Dear

Dear.

Summery: Harry gets bored over the holidays and starts to write to some rather unlikely people.

Disclaimer: I don’t own Harry Potter or claim any of the characters as my own.


Chapter 1.

Harry was bored. Not the I’m bored lets watch some TV. No he was the I’m so bored I’m going to die if nothing happens type of bored. His life had become very boring after the defeat of Voldermort. It was quite funny when he thought about it.
They had been standing across from each other in the graveyard when the dark lord advanced on him. Harry wasn’t sure but he thinks that Voldermort had tried to do that bellowing thing with his robes that Snape does but had failed. He had subsequently tripped on the hem of his robe tumbled and creaked his head open on a tomb stone before bleeding to death.
“Damn.” Harry muttered. Not even thinking about the weird death could nullify the bordem. So what to do? He couldn’t do much since he was for some unknown reason stuck with the Dursley’s. Perhaps he could write to Ron and Hermione. That normally made him feel better. So getting up from the bed Harry made his way to his desk. Taking out a piece of parchment and a quill he began his letter.

‘Hi Ron

If you didn’t guess it’s me Harry, your best friend.’

Stopping there he realised that he didn’t really have anything to say to either of his friends since they had yet to reply to his previous letters. Groaning as he lent back in his chair he felt the cold grip of bordom threaten to take over.
Not willing to let this happen Harry went through the list of people he could write to, Remus, the Weasleys, Dumbledore. None of those sounded very fun. Ehat was he going to say? That he was fine and just dropped a line because he was bored? No he wouldn’t do it but what could he do?
It was then that the phone rang and an evil idea sprung into mind. He recalled hearing his Uncle complain to someone over the phone once about spam mail. And so he would spam some people in the wizarding world. And he knew exactly who to start with.

‘Dear Snape

Congratulation!
You are officially nominated for an amazing award. This is a deffinate must have for any person shelf. This wonderfull statue is given out only once every twenty years to someone who has made a lasting impretion on those they meet, and you have been nominated!
To receive your invitation please send your contact details with this owl.’

Laughing once he finished it Harry decided that he would write another.

‘Dear Malfoy

If you are reading this then you are elegable to win a ride on the best thing in the world. Witches and wizards all over the world wish for a chance to win this prize.
All you have to do is write your full name, age and occupation on a piece of parchment and sent it to 12 Grimuld Place along with the answer to this simple question.
How big is Professor Snape’s dick normally and when erect?’

Laughing again Harry felt considerably better then he had. Now all he had to do was tell Remus to send him any mail sent to Grimmuld place.
This was bound to be an exiting holiday.


Ok so please review.
Jinx.