Prank Wars

Disclaimer: I don\'t own any of this, and I\'m not making money off of this.

Warnings: None for this chapter.

A/N: Ok. This has been itching in the back of my mind for a while. I couldn’t figure out what to do with it until now. Although I did love HBP, it doesn’t happen. Instead, Harry killed Voldemort during year six. Draco and Severus aren’t evil… well, not that evil. He, he. And Dumbledore isn’t dead. Are we good? I think so. And the NC-17 rating is for later chapters. Just follow the warnings for each chap to know what to expect. Let the story commence!

The summer passed by reasonably quickly. Harry stayed at the Dursley’s house for the last time. He was only there for a month, and then he went to The Burrow to stay with the Weasley family for the rest of the holiday.

When their Hogwarts letters arrived, Mrs. Weasley took Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny to Diagon Alley to get schools supplies. They first stopped at Madam Malkin’s Robes for All Occasions shop to get new clothes. Ron and Ginny were both getting fitted for their new school robes so Harry and Hermione decided to look around. Mrs. Weasley was in a fit about Ron growing way too quickly and they didn’t want to set around and listen to that.

Harry stopped in front of the dress robes, and began to sift through them. He needed a whole new wardrobe. He was quite sick of wearing Dudley’s hand-me-downs. He stopped over a dark green robe with black velvet designs moving through it.

“That’s nice, Harry. Why don’t you try it on?” Hermione asked him. She had a strange gleam in her eye that scared him.

“Yeah, I think I like it,” he said as he pulled it off the rack.

By the time they made their way to the dressing room, Hermione had showed a sinful enthusiasm for clothes shopping. She had nearly pulled down everything that had caught her eye saying, “Oh, Harry, this will look so good on you,” or, “Merlin, this is drop-dead gorgeous. Try this on too, Harry.”

Harry had to admit, all the clothes and robes that she had chosen for him looked good. They were all fitted very nicely on him, showing off his lean-cut Quidditch physique. He caught himself primping in the mirror every couple outfits. Hermione wasn’t helping.

“Harry, you are so hot. I want more. I need more,” she shouted after a catcall.

He blushed. “Hermione cut it out.”

He spent quite a bit on his new wardrobe, but figured it was worth it. When Mrs. Weasley saw the mountain of sacks and packages, she about through another tantrum, but decided that it was his money and if he wanted to blow it all away that was his choice. She simply flicked her wand and the parcels were sent back to The Burrow.

They went to Flourish & Blotts to get their books after that. Then, Mrs. Weasley and Ginny went to Florean Fortescue’s Ice Cream Parlor for some frozen custard, and the trio decided to drop by Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes to visit the twins.

When they walked inside, George eyed Hermione up and down. His gaze stopped over her rather nice breasts. He was almost drooling.

“Hey, stop ogling my rack, please,” she said after blushing slightly.

“Can’t help it. When did you… grow up?!” George asked with a grin.

“George, sod off. She’s mine,” Ron said quickly and draped an arm around her.

Ron had finally hooked up with her at the end of last year. And she had become quite the looker over the summer. Harry was gay, and even he thought she was a fox. She filled out nicely, with curves in all the right places. Her hair was no longer a tangled mess, but now had think curls with blond highlights. And she used just enough makeup to accent her natural beauty.

They all just laughed when Fred came up, and stared at her with the same expression as his twin.

Hermione looked irritated. “Will you two stop undressing me with your eyes?!” she shot out.

They all laughed again and Fred ran off, yelling at some little girl not to touch something. Ron and Hermione walked to a display while holding hands, and said something about snogging. George looked to Harry and sighed.

“I was wondering when those two would finally shack up,” George said.

“Yeah, took them bloody long enough,” Harry stated with a smirk.

“So, what about you, Harry? Have you got a special someone that I need to know about?” he asked Harry and nudged his side.

“Not yet. Nothing’s really caught my eye,” he lied. Harry had a few guys on his mind, but didn’t know if Ron had told him if he was gay. And he didn’t want to broadcast that fact in the crammed shop.

“Oh well, you’ll find Mr. Right eventually.”

Harry just chuckled awkwardly. Apparently Ron did tell him that he liked guys.

George gave him reassuring smile. “Harry, no one cares if you like to bump ugly with blokes. It’s not a very big deal in the wizarding world.”

Harry felt a little relieved. He hadn’t really come out to everyone yet, and he felt very uncomfortable talking about it because it was looked down upon by muggles.

“Just as long as you don’t make a pass at me, we’ll be fine,” George snorted.

Harry gave him a suggestive grin and gazed over the tall twin. George’s smile disappeared.

“Harry, you aren’t going to make a pass at me, are you?” he shifted nervously.

Harry just continued to beam at him. He ran a finger down George’s chest and leaned in slightly. “You know, George, I do have a thing for lanky redheads. They just rock my world.”

George yelped. “Cut it out Harry. That’s not funny.”

“Oh yes it is.” Harry was holding his sides he was laughing so hard.

“But seriously Harry, you wouldn’t make a move on me, right?” George asked still looking uneasy.

“Sorry babes, but your not my type,” Harry just giggled harder.

George took a deep sigh. “You had me going there for a minute.” He smiled at Harry again. “So, you come up with any good pranks? I could give you a couple if you want.”

Harry raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

George’s eyes widened. “Prank Wars?”

Harry shrugged.

“Merlin, Harry. You don’t know about seventh year Prank Wars?! It’s only the best thing about your last year at Hogwarts. You see, each year the four houses pull huge pranks on each other. I think it was originally created to help the seventh years take their minds off of N.E.W.T.’s, but now they’ve made a contest out of it. Whoever pulls the best pranks of the year gets bragging rights. No real prizes.

But sometimes it gets really dirty. Bill said that things got so bad in his year that the professors were getting involved, too. Ole’ McGonagall helped the Gryffindors sneak into the Slytherin dorms and plant hundreds of snakes all over the place.”

Harry was laughing so hard his sides hurt. He could just imagine his Head of House tiptoeing into the Slytherin common room with her finger to her lips as she waves in all the Gryffindors. He would have never thought McGonagall would help pull something like that.

“How come I haven’t heard of it?” Harry inquired.

“They haven’t been doing a whole lot of pranking ever since You-Know-Who came around. But now that he’s gone, thanks to you I might add, I’m sure it will be back in full swing.

“You know, the only regret I have from leaving school early was the Prank Wars. Fred and I would have turned Hogwarts upside-down,” he smirked.

Ron and Hermione walked back up. “Hey, Harry, I think we are heading out soon,” Ron said.

“Oh, alright,” he told Ron. “Well, I guess I will see you later, George.”

George nodded. “Bye, bye then. Give them hell at Hogwarts for me!” he shouted after the trio as they left.

“What was that about?” Ron asked lazily.

“I have no clue,” Harry laughed. “Prank Wars.”

Ron’s eyes widened and Hermione gave a disapproving look.

“It’s going to be great, isn’t it?” Ron smiled.

“A bunch of childish games,” Hermione spat out and turned up her nose. “You should be worried about N.E.W.T.’s instead of pulling those ridiculous shenanigans.”

“Baby, you’re starting to sound like mum,” Ron sneered.

Hermione glared at him for that comment, but let it go.

They all met up and left Diagon Alley just a little bit later. Harry was looking forward to the new year at Hogwarts. He figured things would be a little bit more interesting to say the least.

A/N: So there it was. Kind of short, I know, but I decided to shorten the chapters so I can put them out quicker. If you would rather wait a little longer and have lengthy chapters, just give me a heads up. I have the next few chapters finished! Maybe if you rate and review enough, I might just add the next sooner. He, he. And again, my beta is currently out of town. So if you find any grammatical errors, just let them slide for now.

Love y’all,

Morgane