Orchestration of Death

Summary: Death sometimes comes on as surprisingly as a cymbal crash, other times it is as subtle as the beginning of Barber\'s \"Adagio for Strings\". This is one of those latter times.
Warnings: Character death. Possible tissue warning.

Author\'s Notes: Feel bad for bothering my beta when I am in a crappy mood, so this is not betaed and all mistakes are mine. Please point out any you find and I will love you. Please review and I will love you all the more.

Orchestration of Death

Death is one of the biggest enigmas to clutter my thought process of late. What lies for us in the great beyond? Is there a heaven and a hell, as some Muggles believe? Is there a fresh life to begin anew? Or do our minds simply shut off and allow coldness and emptiness to seep in? The thought of what awaits me as had me preoccupied for the last two weeks when I felt my own death approaching. Many are afraid to die while others who are brave do not fear it at all. Even though I am a Gryffindor, I am not in the latter category. Where death is concerned, my Slytherin side takes over.

Only a month ago I killed Voldemort in one of the biggest battles known to Wizarding kind. Finding the remaining Horcruxes with the help from my lover and his protege took seven long years that were often wrought with despair. After the last horcrux was found and destroyed, the battle began almost immediately and lasted several arduous days until I had a clean shot to duel with my nemesis. As soon as his withered body fell to the ground, I felt it start; the depletion of my magic. We all had thought that my levels would raise again in time, but alas, that was not to be.

I did not realize the complicity of the effects until I was lying in bed with Severus one night and my whole body began to tingle. It was as if my whole body was buzzing, but not in the pleasurable way that is brought on by my love bringing me to the throes of ecstacy. No, this prickling sensation has an ominous attachment to it. It was the first, but not the last warnings of my impending end.

The second warning appears as quickly as the first only a mere two days later. As another bout of body tingles come to an end, my chest feels as though weights are being laid on top of it. My breathing becomes more shallow as taking in air becomes a chore.

Severus happens to be laying next to me during one of these episodes. I can feel his beetle eyes on me as the pressure is slowly lifting off of my chest. His concerned eyes stare at me intently as his tapered fingers idly stroke my naked hip. Lying more convincingly than I ever have to him in the past, I am able to pass it off as an approaching cold. I do not tell him the truth out of fear that he will detach himself physically and emotionally from me. It may be selfish, but I need him more than anything right now in what little time I have remaining. He does not need to know that those are not chills, but the crescendo to my soon coming demise.

Our lives continue as normally as they can for the next week and I am successful in hiding further occurrences. As unfortunate as it is, it is in the middle of sex that I find my time has run out. Severus is thrusting inside of me as I feel my heart clench in agony. Severus mistakes my nails digging harshly into his forearms as an urge for him to go faster. I can feel my orgasm approaching just as quickly as my end and between the two it is as though it is a race to the finish line to see who can come in first. Hazily, I can hear the words, ‘I love you’, tumble from between my lips right before a shock pulses through my body.

Somehow I am now floating above our bed. I can see that my body is still below underneath Severus on the bed. I bite my lip as I watch Severus, still unaware, pounding into the prone form that was once me. His body tenses for a brief moment before collapsing onto my shell. As I watch the next scenes flash before me of his horrified realization and his pleading for me to wake up, I feel a pang of regret for not telling him what I had been feeling. I had thought I would die peacefully in my sleep, not go out in the middle of an intimate moment with my beloved. My former fears of his leaving me are replaced with my fear of Severus blaming himself for my death. I wish that there was some way I could reassure him, but I know I can no longer dwell on it as an intangible force is dragging me away to begin what lies ahead of me.

~_______________________________~

This writer from the Dailey Prophet is saddened to report that on this Christmas morning the body of Harry James Potter was found dead in the home that he and his lover, Severus Snape, shared. Mr. Potter, 24, is said to have suffered from a slow hemorrhaging in the brain that was not caught in time by Mediwizards. Mr. Potter will be laid to rest next Wednesday morning next to his parents.

When contacting Mr. Snape, Potions Master for Hogwarts and former Death Eater, for a comment, we were told by family friend, Draco Malfoy, that Mr. Snape wishes time to mourn and that his privacy be respected. Mr. Malfoy also added that any contributions intended for Mr. Potter’s family should be instead directed to the funds for war orphans instead.

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