Just another Story

Title: Just another Story
Arthor: Mirestelfea
Rating: NC 17
Warning: Angst, M/M
Summery: It’s a bond fic but in this one, the bond does not force love: So what happens when a bond begins to fall apart.
Disclaimer: As always I am not J.k. nor do i pretend to be, I am not making money on this so please no sueing as I own nothing of value.
AN: Just to let all those who are reading my other A Pale Shadow, I haven’t forgotten it, I am a bit stuck and this muse wanted out.

The warm breeze of June teased the long dark hair of the man standing on the balcony as he mused on the turn of events of his life over the past four years. His old master had finally been killed with much cost by those that opposed him, from the deaths of dear friends to what had been asked of the boy who lived and himself. He had fought it tooth and nail but the wisdom behind the plan was not lost on him and in the end he had given in to Albus as he always did. It had been simple, to increase both Harry’s power as well as give the boy an anchor for his new powers, a bond was needed.

Sighing he ran a shaking hand through his hair and despite what others said, it was not greasy at least not all the time. A bitter smile touched his face as he realized that Harry had mentioned the same on the night the bond took place as if the young wizard was in awe of the fact. The bond, it all came back to that simple spell, one that would bind their powers together and allow them to cast stronger and more complex spells. It also allowed for better protection on both parts as both in the bond gained a powerful blood ward. Still with all the benefits, Severus could only see pain resulting in the actions of this path, while the bond could not encourage love between the involved parties; it did not protect either should one fall in love while the other did not. He had not seen that event happening so he had reluctantly agreed, a little annoyed that on some level he would be tied to Potter for the rest of his life but then the thought that Potter would be tied to him gave him a measure of twisted pleasure. If only he had known then what he did now, he might have fought harder for one of Harry’s friends to be the bond partner or at least that damn werewolf Lupin to be the person.

Dark eyes that used to glitter stared dully over the garden that was growing below in the summer’s heat and sun. It seemed only yesterday to him that it had been overgrown, desolate place, where weeds and shadows had choked all life from it but now it was as vibrant as the young man who brought it back to life. A bitter laughter bubbled forth from the pit of his soul as he couldn’t help but see the comparison of his own life in that garden but unlike the flowers found there, his own soul had lost its final battle.

Yes Harry had fought when he learned what was wanted to be done, only to calm down when Severus himself had told him that this would only happen if Harry wanted it to. Albus had been mad at him but this once he had not allowed the man to win, it would be Harry’s choice, since the boy had little of that in his short life. It surprised him that two days later had found himself back in the office, to hear that after doing much thinking and talking with his best friends that he would go through with the bond. So it was that three days after all had been agreed that Severus found himself standing by the fountain that at the time was nothing more than a stagnate pool looking into green eyes that were filled with apprehension and speaking a spell that would bind them together. He had not felt the cut into his palm as the spell was being worked, nor did he remember cutting Potter’s own smaller hand with the same silver knife. He barely remembered that when his blood had touched the water that it had caused it to hiss and to bubble angrily but when Harry’s blood had touched it, the water bubbled more before becoming pure again. It was then that Severus had realized the enormity of the mistake that he made and just what he had sacrificed.

Wrapping his cloak tighter around him to fight back the cold that was a constant state, he forced back the sadness that wished to spill tears down his gaunt face. He had realized that Harry would do the one thing he had not been able to do, purify Snape Manor and bring it back to life. He knew then that Harry would drive away the darkness that had been a constant in his life and somehow knew that he would not be around to see the final touches that would bring the manor back to its once glorious state of the distant past. At the time he had dismissed the thought as foolishness, there was more important things to think on, such as training Harry to use his power to their fullest capacity as well as making sure that the dark master would not realize what had happened when he played his role. There had been times Severus was sure that he would die and leave Harry to deal with sudden rush of power as his own magic became Harry’s. Shaking his head, foolish to think of things that did not happen but at the time it had been a driving force to Severus’ every action there after.

Slowly Severus moved away from the balcony, his steps having lost much of the grace that they once had as he shuffled some to move. Stopping when he got to his room, he found he was no longer as surprised to find that he was worn from the movements. He looked around, taking in the large four post bed, draped in midnight blues and forest greens and felt the heaviness again. Harry had only been in this room for one week before it became apparent that he was not happy sharing the bed. While the bond could not force love it was stronger if the two parts agreed to seal it by having sex. Harry, true to his Gryffindor nature had accepted this with bravery,a bravery that Severus was sure he wouldn’t have possessed at that age. Still it had happened and even now if the man closed his eyes, he could feel Harry’s shy touches upon his body, smell the sun and light musk that he attributed to Harry, as well as taste the other wizard’s flesh. How lovely he had looked, his face flushed from passion, his deep green eyes alight with pleasure and his smaller frame shaking with desire. Strong legs had naturally wrapped around Severus’s body with the strength that could only be gained by flying a broom and low moans escaped the young man’s throat as Severus kissed down his body. His tongue flicking over each inch, tasting the slightly sweet but salty taste and he had been reward to Harry rubbing his body to his own when Severus had sucked on one of those pert nipples. Harry had been a natural, even when Severus had begun to prepare to take him, making sure to be gentle and supportive in each movement. He remembered how good Harry’s heat had felt just wrapped around his fingers as he stretched Harry. Severus remembered how he had almost passed out as he slowly slide into his reluctant lover, between the sheer tightness to the warmth the enveloped him he had been sure he could have died happy in that moment.

Leaning against one of the post he couldn’t but help wish that he had died in that moment and be damned with what it would have done to the lucky prat that was his bonded. He had stilled himself once buried deep within the younger man, both to let Harry get used to the feeling as well as allowing himself to fully enjoy what was happening but it had only taken a few seconds before Harry began to beg him to move. Just hearing Harry’s voice dripped with desire had been enough to spur him into moving and he had allowed himself to believe that Harry actually had wanted him. The feeling of sliding in and out of that tight hole had nearly undone Severus before it was time as well as the mewling and begging Harry had done. If he allowed himself he could feel Harry moving against each of his thrust, driving him deeper so that Severus would brush that sweet spot in him. He could feel Harry’s heavy cock in his hand as he stroked it as he took him, coaxing him to come with him over the edge and to their orgasm. That was all it had taken as he felt Harry tighten around him and both had come screaming each other names and for Severus the sound of his name on those beautiful lips had been pure music but that had been the only time he would hear it.

Grabbing a cane that was magicked to help him walk with little effort, Severus walked out of the room and sighed. It was then that Severus was sure that a small part of him had begun to hope that maybe Harry could come to care about him and take their bond to another level after Voldemort had died but even then he should have known better. Closing the door he walked down the hall to where Harry’s room was to be found and slowly he opened the door. Unlike his own, Harry’s was done in cheerful colors of yellows; it looked more welcoming than his own and stayed just at the door. This room had once been done in a maroon color, it had been his mothers. He had given it to Harry when the young man came to live with him that last summer that Voldemort would live to terrorize the wizarding world. It was that same summer that Severus had given Harry permission to redecorate the Manor as he saw fit except two places, his own room and in the basement his potion lab. He remembered how happy Harry had looked as the boy asked if Severus was certain. Severus had laughed and said yes, it was far past time for the manor to lose some of its darkness and he was sure Harry would be able to do it. He had felt bad, upon learning how those muggle relatives had treated Harry and had decided to let the young wizard make the manor his home. Snape hadn’t realized then at least not on a conscious level that would mean he would lose his own home in the process. It had been a great joy to watch as Harry redid each room, brining it back to life and Severus couldn’t have denied him if he had thought to stop it.

Shutting the door that had been the start of the end for him, Severus turned and walked down the grand stairs that had been brought back to life. The marble that had once been dingy now shone a brilliant white and even the pictures on the walls that where his relatives had seemed brighter. Well not now as he was sure they were grumbling about having been placed in a large crate that had been sent to his other home, Hogwarts, to be stored. Somehow he could not bring himself to leave them on the walls any longer as they were not Harry’s family and now instead were the portraits of the Potters. All looking pleased if not slightly confused as to why they were hanging in this house. No he would not leave his family in this house to be a reminder to Potter of it’s once darkness.

Stepping into the large hall he moved to the library, Granger had helped Harry with this room and he was sure that Harry would learn to regret that. Hermione defiantly loved books and Harry would learn that his friend would likely to be found in this room every moment that she could. Severus looked around at the white walls with light oak shelves that housed each precious book. There were comfortable chairs of cream circling the grand fireplace as well two large cream and tan couches for a reader to sit at. Hermione had insisted on a few tables so that if anyone needed to study or make notes that they could do so in comfort. An ancient chess board of white and black marble sat in one corner, its pieces carefully stored in small drawers hidden in the base at the moment. He closed his eyes and could see red hair bent down next to his beloveds messy dark hair as the two played. Harry had improved but was still hardly a match for Ron but the two still played the game. Where as Harry and himself had only played maybe twice in the four years they had been together and a part of Severus ached at that knowledge. He had wanted to be more of a part to young Harry’s life but learned that summer it was nothing more than that a wish. While Harry would talk to him, he had made it clear that he still thought of Severus as a greasy git who lived to make his life hard. That had hurt deeply but Severus had hidden his pain, he did after all have years of practice on masking his feelings.

He looked up to where a painting of Lily and James staring back down at him from above the fireplace and he wished he could be here to see Harry’s face when he saw the picture, it was Severus’s going away present to the young man. He had it commissioned not long after Harry had finally defeated Voldemort and whispered, “I think he will be happy to see the two of you, to remind him of how much he was loved.”


James seemed to glare at him as Lily looked sadly upon the older man as he moved out of the room. He could go through each room and have a memory of Harry, of how Harry rescued his childhood home from disrepair and each memory added another weight upon his over burdened soul. Stopping in front of mirror that was hanging in the hallway to look into his own pale face that showed now only weariness, pain etched the lines there deeper into his face, Severus let one tear fall, “Of course how could he care for me, I am not handsome by any means, I have a horrid personality and I look like I should have died years ago. At least if the rumors in the Prophet are right then Harry has found what he has wanted and is in love, who am I to deny him that. It’s not like I every really thought that I would be loved or cared for. Hell I will be luck if anyone besides Albus morns my passing from this world.”

Walking over to the last picture still remaining propped up on a chair from when he had made room for Harry’s parents he looked at it. It was a picture of him, it used to be next to a picture of Harry’s but he had moved that picture to Harry’s small study. His own looked back at him, there was pain even then in his eyes and the smile that had once been there when it had hung next to his partners was gone. He put a cover over it and walked to the main doors. Pausing he looked back, how great it would have been if he had been able to have the love Harry had given his house. It wasn’t to be, he knew that and he walked out for what he knew would be the last time. No one could have foreseen that the man who was said to be without a heart or soul would fall for the golden boy. None could have known that by doing the bond that Severus’s death sentence had been signed, none except himself.

Stepping past the wards that protected the house, Severus apperated to just outside Hogwarts and made his way to the place he would die. It seemed fitting to him, even though he had always planned on leaving it when he was free of the stupidity of his youth and go traveling. Slowly he made his way down to his rooms and whispered the password and into his dungeon home. Sitting down the few pieces of luggage Severus sat down in his favorite chair and stared at the fire that had come to life at his presence. At least Harry was still away with England’s quidditch team; he had taken the spot as the seeker and in his first year had brought home the world cup. He would miss going to see Harry doing the one thing that he loved to do more than anything else. By the time Harry had come back, Severus knew he would be dead and to any that really didn’t think to look it would appear that he had died of natural causes. After all it was natural to die if you weren’t eating or drinking and that is what would really kill him in the end. The chills was the first sign to coming end, followed by shakes that were so bad it left him unable to make potions anymore and finally he would lose himself to his own mind. He would withdraw from the world unable to do anything but lapse in a sort of coma before he would die. It was said that it wasn’t really a painful death and Severus had found that he was at the last of the stages as he couldn’t account for lost time. He would find himself staring at nothing losing entire afternoons only to come back to the world in the late of night. He could almost feel that he was going into another fit as he called them and just surrendered to it.


Albus stopped talking as he felt a tug on the wards; he was slightly puzzled as to why Severus would be here as he normally wouldn’t show up till it was a week before classes to start. He knew that Severus liked to be home to greet Harry when he got back from the world cup and he looked to Minerva, “Severus is here.”

Minerva looked to her husband with the same amount of shock, “Really I wonder what has happened?”

Albus could only give a shrug, “We will give him some time to see if he comes to us before we go see what he is doing here. I am sure that it is nothing to worry about Minerva, he could just need some ingredients for a potion he can only find here.”

She wished she could believe that but she knew Albus didn’t really buy it either, “I suppose your right as far as I know Harry and him are still getting along. I haven’t heard anything that would say different.”

Albus smiled, “True neither man would be afraid to tell us if there was something troubling them. No I am sure that Severus just needed something for one of his many potions. Lupin was telling me that the new wolfsbane was the best ever and it even managed not to taste nearly as bad.”

Minerva grasped onto that news, of course Severus must be working on his pet project, “Well that is good news to hear, I know how hard Severus has been working to make the transformation less taxing on the afflicted.”
With that the headmaster and the deputy headmistress began to go over the upcoming school year, making plans and discussing who should take over Binn’s job.

Severus blinked as he became aware of his surroundings with a feeling of alarm till he realized that he was back in the dungeons. Quickly he looked to the clock and read that it was nine but he couldn’t be sure if it was at night or the next day. He stood shakily and started as he heard a pop next to him. Looking down he saw Dobby standing there, “Master Dumbledore is asking you to come to his office for tea sir.”

Snape nodded wearily as he reached out for his cane and then looked down again as Dobby handed it to him, “Is you wanting me to tell him you is sick sir?”

“No Dobby I will be fine.” Severus said none of the malice or even any of the old spirit was in that dark voice. To Dobby it sounded so hallow and even though Snape was not the easiest to get along with, he knew that the man had tried to change for Harry.

Dobby gave a nod, “I is telling him you is to be there soon sir. I am sorry sir you are leaving us.”

Snape’s dull eyes of black looked into Dobby’s as he gave a small bitter laugh, “I would deny that but I am sure you can tell what is happening. Dobby tell no one else though, let them think it was just this old man’s time to go when it happens.”

Dobby’s ears dropped some, “Dobby is wondering does master Harry know?”

Snape shook his head as headed for the door, “No Harry does not know and nor will he, Dobby. He had found someone that makes him happy and he loves this person. I just want him to be happy and not blaming himself for what is happening to me Dobby.” He looked back to the house elf, “Harry deserves to be happy after all that has happened to him, he deserves that and he has my blessing.”

“I won’t tell anyone Master Snape.” Dobby said, his small voice filled with sadness as the house elf left the room.

Snape looked to the spot where he had stood, “Good Dobby, knowing Harry like I do he would do just that and ruin his chance. I won’t allow that to happen, not while I still have strength to do so.”

It had taken him longer than he had thought it would to reach the headmaster’s office and he was grateful for the chair as he sat down. He tried his hardest not to show any weakness as he said in his best ‘why am I here’ voice, “Yes you wanted to see me Albus.”

Albus smiled at him, the normal twinkle in his eyes was more subdued than normal, “Yes just a bit surprised that you are here is all,” the headmaster held up his hand, “I know I’m being a nosey old man but surely you can allow me that.”

Snape gave a half laugh, “I do believe that I have always allowed you that Albus but I need to use the library for a potion I am trying work on.”

Albus nodded, knowing that he was being lied to but not wanting to call Severus on it yet, “I was wondering if that was it or not, you know Remus told me all about your improvements on the wolfs bane potion. He said that he wasn’t aching at all like he normally did.”

A pleased smile showed on Severus’s face, “Good I was hoping that my additions would help stop the pain and wear and tear on the body of his kind.”

Albus smiled, “I hear that you might be considered for the honor of greatest contribution to potions with your improvements.”

At one time this would have been all he needed to be happy, at one time he would have burned with self pleasure to earn such an honor but now it was a hallow victory, “That is nice to hear but there are others are working on far better potions than what I did.”

Albus chuckled as he shook his head, “No Severus my boy not even I believe that, with your changes a whole group of suffering people will be allowed back into society.”

Severus blushed as he pulled his cloak tight against him again, “Yes well if that is all I need to get back to my research, I will let you know what I am up to when I have brewed a successful potion.”

“Of course my dear boy and feel free if you need to take a break to come and see me. I haven’t had anyone to play chess with when you are not here.” Albus said and watched Severus walk off. The mirth that had been on his face fell as he looked to Fawks and sighed, “I had hoped that it wouldn’t end this way, I need you to find Remus and bring him back here Fawks.”

The phoenix gave one trill before it headed out of the headmasters chamber, he hoped that Severus was telling the truth but what he had seen, Albus knew well that another would be added to Hogwarts graveyard before the term even started.

an: I just have a little thing to add here, I have finished this but well I really don\'t like what i have done as it is I will put my ending up as well as a challenge at the end. Please as always review and constructive critiscm is welcome. For all flamers spear me, there is this wonderful thing called a back button, if you do not like my story i would suggest you use that as no one is forcing you to read any stories that are put up. With that thank you for reading my story and I hope that you like it.