Harry Hunting

Harry Hunting

Disclaimer
Intellectual Property of J. K. Rowling, I make no money from this. I own nothing, nothing, If you recognise it I have no right to talk about it. But you can’t do anything about it. Ha, Ha, Ha, ha.

\"Careful planning is the key to safe and swift travel\"
-Odysseus

Chapter One

The central train station was so crowded with busy travelers that Harry Potter
could barely push his way through to get to his train.

Harry had been noticing that some of the travelers in King’s Cross station
giving him glances. But, that could just be because he had an owl in a cage,
which tended to stick out like a sore thumb. As he drew closer to the pillar
that would lead onto platform 9 ¾, Harry hoped that the day would turn out
alright. Oh, no, he did it again. It was only a short step to tempting fate that
way. Stupid Harry, don’t tempt fate. In fact, she’ll probably think up something
new and unusual just for me.

Passing through the barrier, a cloud of steam from the Hogwarts Express hindered
his vision for a second. As soon as his sight cleared, he could see hundreds of
students running around wishing their parents goodbye and meeting friends. As he
stepped through the smoke, he was forced forward and slammed forward into the
ground, knocking his head on the concrete.

The crowd surrounding Harry was not as shocked as you would think if a teenage
boy collapsed in the middle of a train platform. A small group of Slytherins,
further up the platform, spotted Harry fall and cheered.

A small group of Slytherin and Ravenclaw had it at 10 to 1 odds that Harry would
collapse as soon as he stepped through the pillar to the train. In fact, some of
the more enterprising Ravenclaws had a pool going for how long into the term it
would take for Harry Potter to faint, scream in class, tell everyone Voldemort
was out to get him, be caught out of bounds or breaking curfew, and a variety of
other events which all ways happened through out the year.

There were even some long-shot bets that had been sitting in the books since first year, such as
Harry getting laid at anytime during the year, Harry getting caught up against
the wall with Snape, and him telling Dumbledore where to shove it when he had to
face Voldemort before summer holidays. It was 2000 to 1 odds that he, Ron, and
Hermione would all come out of the closet at the same time, and form a
three-some, in the first week of school.

Hermione and Ron, who had arrived earlier, having taken into account early
morning traffic in London, rushed over to the fallen Gryffindor. \"Ron, did you
bring any water with you?\"

\"What? I thought you’d have some. You’re the responsible one.\"

\"Ron, I asked you if you had any water. If you don\'t, then just get some from
that bubbler over there. Now!\" Ron otherwise know as Hermione\'s - Bitch walked off, grumbling.

\"Harry, I’m surprised Dumbledore never made you wear a helmet, what with the
amount of times you fall on your face. It’s worse than narcolepsy.\" Ron came
back to the kneeling Hermione and handed her a paper cup.

Harry groaned and held a hand to his head. \"Cheers, Hermione. I don’t know where
I would be if you weren’t always there to help.\"
Smiling at his two friends, he stood up and leaned against his trunk.
\"Hi, guys. What are you up to?\"

\"Harry, are you alright? It wasn’t anything to do with You-Know-Who, was it?\"

Harry scowled then quickly removed the look from his face. \"Thank you for
caring, but, no. It’s just that the Dursley’s haven\'t really been feeding me
during the holidays. I’m faint with hunger.\" Placing the back of one hand to his
head, Harry laughed. \"You would think they would feed me by now.\"

\"Well, you know your relatives would be hard put to take their heads out of
their own arses and do anything.\"

\"Yeah, Harry. When you’re allowed to do magic outside of Hogwarts, I want to be
there.\" A mental image appeared in Harry’s mind. I wonder if there is a spell
that will let me shove Vernon’s head up his own arse.

Getting onto the train was easy. It was putting up with the idiots who somehow
still saw him as a celebrity that pissed him off.

Settling back in an empty compartment, Ron, Hermione, and Harry talked about
their holiday and what they were going to do at school. Thoughts of Voldemort
for the moment pushed away because you can’t be depressed all the time, even if
you try really hard.

Hermione, having been named a prefect this year, was called away from the
carriage to join the others in a meeting. Sitting back after the food cart had
gone past, Ron and Harry were eating enough magical food to make Hagrid ill.

\"So, Ron, have you made a move on Hermione yet?\" Ron started choking on the
chocolate frog he had just eaten.

\"What?! You know no sexual contact is allowed
in Hogwarts. People burnt their books because there were witches. Hell knows
what there would be if we started acting our age.\"

\"Okay, so I’ll assume you spent the time jerking off to porno then.\"
A disappointed Ron sighed and stared at the carpet. \"Yeah, but it was good
porno.\" Ron said justify himself to Harry.

\"You could never be as bad as Dudley. He discovered internet porn over the term
while he was at school this year. The sound of people fucking echoed into my
room. There are some noises that are just wrong. Have you ever heard a donkey
cry?\"

“Stop, stop. Thanks for sharing that. I really didn’t need to hear that.\"

\"I just thought I would share.\" Harry laughed at the look on Ron’s face. He
wouldn’t tell him about when Vernon discovered his son’s collection and had a
private screening while Petunia had been out. Father and son should not be that
close.

\"Have you heard anything from Dumbledore while you were home?\" Harry picked up a
chocolate frog and bit off its head.

\"No. I swear that guy is mental. With what happened last year, I would have
thought that there would be more stuff happening, but all I got was a postcard
after my birthday telling me what a great time he was having in Fiji. He lives
in a fucking world of his own.\" A noise from outside the cart made the boys turn
and watch as Drano Malloy, walked in.

Over the summer, Malfoy had changed as most teenagers do. His once short white
blond hair fell in a sharp cut to his chin. The once pinched and sour face
looked refined; a golden glow graced his skin. The gym at the Malfoy manor had
been liberally used by the prince of Slytherin. In fact, he looked extremely
hot, which explained the fact that several Slytherin females and males were hanging off
his arms.

\"So, Weasel and Potty, back for another year?\"

Harry sighed. \"Look, Malfoy, think about what you just said. Are you kidding?
You sound like an eight year old. All you do is act sarcastic and cause
problems. What the hell are you going to do when you have to think for
yourself?\"

The perfection of Malfoy’s brow was marred for a second by a frown. \"Potter, I
may seem to be a two-dimensional figure at times, but I do think for myself and
you and the Weasel really are pathetic.\"

A miffed Malfoy turned his perfect nose up and stormed out of the room.

As Harry sat looking out the window, he could see the passing countryside flow
past. Ron had crawled up on his seat and was fast asleep. Every so often Harry
could hear some mumbling. \"No Mum, they’re educational. . . . No, don’t take
them . . .”

If fate didn’t shit on him from above, then this year may work out,
but it was Murphy‘s law in action when you looked at his life. He was sure that
somewhere in the world there was someone was living the life he should have
gotten. They probably had a loving family, no evil megalomaniac into bestiality
out to get them, and a life.

If he ever met the bastard he was going to beat the crap out of them.
Since stepping through the pillar to platform 9 ¾, a new part of his mind was
telling him that maybe he would have been better if he had just taken a train to
some place--any place-- else. For all that
Hogwarts was meant to be so safe, he had been attacked by Voldemort’s forces
every time he went to school. Standing in the middle of the freeway looked safer
than Hogwarts to him at the moment. No one was going to force him to do
anything. Harry leaned his eyes into the palms of his hands and rubbed. For all
he knew, the entire school would turn into ravening zombies and hunt him down on
Halloween, Resident Evil style.

Thumping his head against the window, Harry hoped nothing happened to push him.
If Malfoy turned up at that moment, fuck cursing the little bastard. He was
going to rip out his windpipe and beat him to death.

A/N This story has been beta\'d by RandH4ever. Much thanks.