Crime and Punishment

Prologue: The collar

Remus and Hermione had joined them for Christmas. Ron had been invited, but had decided to spend the day with his family. His letter had promised Harry that they would meet up some time over the holiday. Technically, he was still at Hogwarts, but the staff could take days off over the holidays. It seemed Hermione was enjoying work. From the paleness of her skin, Harry was sure she was spending all her time in the Department of Mysteries. She wouldn’t say anything about her work, except that she was finding it fascinating.

Harry had enjoyed having the company, even though it had included an awkward conversation with Remus about how he and Sirius were getting along. Sirius had written to Remus almost as soon as the two of them had admitted to loving each other, but Harry wasn’t sure if Remus knew just how far this relationship went. It seemed he did, and his questions were aimed at making sure that Harry was happy and not just acting out of a desire to please Sirius.

But the truth was, Harry had never been happier than he was now, in this strange relationship he didn’t quite understand. He felt protected and cared for in a way that he’d never thought possible. Even the old nightmares that had haunted him for years were gone.

Obviously Remus had expressed the same concerns to Sirius, since he took Harry into the lounge for a talk once their guests had gone. They sat side by side on the sofa, Harry leaning against Sirius’ shoulder and Sirius’ arm wrapped protectively around him.

“Are you sure, Harry,” Sirius asked, “about what you’ve let yourself in for?”

“I haven’t had a nightmare since the first day I walked into the playroom,” Harry answered, “Even before I knew I was a wizard, I would dream about my parents’ death. But these past few months I’ve felt safer than I’ve felt for as long as I can remember.”

“You want this? You want to carry on this way?”

“I love you, I trust you and I feel blessed for you to want me to be yours. Of course I want this.” The briefest of kisses ghosted over Harry’s lips, then Sirius stood.

“Wait here.” He left quickly and returned almost instantly, holding a small box in his hands.

“I didn’t want to give you this while the others were here,” he told Harry, handed over the box. Curious, Harry lifted the lid. A collar of supple leather lay inside, but it was unlike those they used for their play. As far as Harry could see, there was no buckle and no way to fasten it.

“I want you to think carefully before accepting,” Sirius said, “because once I put that collar on you, you won’t be able to take it off.” Harry understood that what Sirius was asking for was a lifelong commitment. He probably expected Harry to need to consider the options, but Harry already knew what he wanted. He took the collar from the box and held it out to Sirius.

“I’m certain. I’m yours, for the rest of my life.”

Gently, almost reverently, Sirius wrapped the band of leather around Harry’s neck. He felt a strange, tingling warmth, which he took to be the back of the collar joining together. It was close enough about his neck so that he couldn’t be able to forget that he wore it, but it would do nothing to hinder his breathing.

“How does it feel?” Sirius asked.

“Like it belongs there.” And Sirius sealed the agreement with a kiss. Sirius then led the way to his bedroom that was slowly becoming theirs, and proceeded to undress Harry with loving care. Their lovemaking was slow and tender, not the violent sex they sometimes had. Everything was about sharing their emotions and their pleasure, Sirius giving to Harry every feeling of joy and love. Harry was left with no doubt that he had just made the best decision of his life.