The You’ve Got To Be Kidding Challenge Responses
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Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Snape/Hermione
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Category:
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Snape/Hermione
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
1,968
Reviews:
2
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
The You’ve Got To Be Kidding Challenge Responses
The “You’ve Got To Be Kidding” 100 Word Challenge Responses
Summary: Various author's responses to The “You’ve Got To Be Kidding” 100 Word Challenge on Wiktt. HG/SS
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Here are the responses to date for The “You’ve Got To Be Kidding” 100 Word Challenge. Authors and the locations of the response are listed for each response. The rnsesnses are listed alphabetical according to the title. The challenge rules are listed at the end.
Please note: if you do not see your response to the challenge here it is because I do not have a link to your response in the challenge folder. If you will e-mail me I will be glad to add it.
Note: Please do not email me to inform me that some of the responses are not exactly 100 words. Some are a bit over, one or more words. It is not up to me to edit the responses, I am merely posting them for others to enjoy. I appreciate each and every person who took the time and energy to answer my challenge. Each one is an enjoyable read and creative in it’s own right.
Enjoy!
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Disclaimer: The characters, settings, etc. of the Harry Potter series are not mine they belong to J.K. Rowling and Co. I promise to return them when I am through. Well, most of them anyway.
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A Slightly Strange Situn Byn By Lady Tuesday
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
*** I decided to write a little snippet that isn’t included in my fic, “Silk Stalkings” … but really could be … as a part of the “You’ve Got to Be Kidding” challenge at WIKTT ***
(PS – If you haven’t read Silk Stalkings, it will still make sense, but you should go read it anyway cuz it’ll be much funnier .)
A Slightly Strange Situation By Lady Tuesday
“Unhand me this instant,” Severus growled at the young woman currently heaving at a pair of black fishnet tights.
Hermione sighed and continued her work, slapping away his hands periodically. “Give over, I’m doing my job,” she said, exasperated. She continued adjusting and moving the stockings, but something just didn’t look quite right. She couldn’t put her finger on what it was … then it hit her. Hermione scuttled out of the room, returned with a razor and said, “It’ll have to go.”
“What?”
She looked down ruefully at his rather hairy legs.
“You’ve got to be kidding!” he roared.
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A strange creature By Nici1807
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1983639/1/
Disclaimer: Nothing mine. Everything belongs to JKR, except the plot. This is my response to the KIDDING Challenge on WIKTT. Thanks to my Beta CallistaEvans for her help!!
A strange creature By Nici1807
She was in need of help and that very soon. The only person in the library was unfortunately. "P. "Professor Snape! Please come. Hurry! I need your help!”
“What happened, Miss Granger?”
"Professor Granger!” She better suppress this comment. "There is something disgusting in the hall."
He snorted. Together they left the library. Severus started laughing. She gave him an unappreciative look. In the distant there was much smoke and odd laughter sounded from grey creatures with red wings. Her body tremble.
"Professor Granger, these are only Hagrids new donkeydragons."
"What?"
"Don-key-dra-gons."
"You've got to be kidding!"
The End
If you know “Shrek2", you will realize the Donkeydragons. I'm from Germany and no native English speaker, but I hope, I translated everything correct and the text is logical.
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An Unexpected Card By Imhilien
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1985285/1/
An Unexpected Card By Imhilien
Being quite practical at eighteen, Hermione is nevertheless surprised by the falling card by her plate on Valentines Day. The card is devoid of gushing sentimentality, with an anonymous, carefully worded expression of affection for her. Despite the efforts of the writer, she recognizes the handwriting and a lump comes to her throat. Hermione had noticed his oddly hesitant behavior around her these days and glancing towards the High Table she sees a watching Professor Snape with wariness and hope in his dark eyes. Her faint look of revulsion wounds a heart.
She muttered, “You’ve got to be kidding!”
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In another version Hermione’s day goes like this……
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Being quite practical at eighteen, Hermione is nevertheless on the verge of blushing as shads ads her Valentines Day card. Despite the efforts of the writer, she recognizes the hand that wrote the anonymous and carefully worded expression of affection for her. Glancing towards the High Table she sees Professor Snape watching her with his eyebrows slightly raised. The card he is holding is a bright pink, but it was the only one she could find for him in Hogsmeade. Despite her careful efforts he has recognized her handwriting.
He mouthed, “Pink? You’ve got to be kidding!”
A/ hav have written two responses to this challenge, or rather, two different ways that Hermione responds on Valentines Day when she receives an unexpected card.
A/N 2: Yes, I am working on the next chapter of ‘Roads’. But these 100 word challenges with their accompanying plot bunnies are very persuasive……
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Dirty Severus By Juji
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1985405/1/
Summary: Hermione stumbles upon a scene she was not quite prepared for - semi-naked Severus and his wand. Response to the WIKTT "you've got to be kidding" 100 word challenge.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter is © J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros., Inc. and various publishers including, but not limited to, Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books.
Dirty Severus By Juji
Propping herself against the doorframe for much needed support, Hermione struggled to muffle her laughter while watching her oblivious husband posture for the rooting restroom mirror.
"Oh, you big bad Slytherin! Again!"
Egged on by the mirror, the newly appointed DADA professor entered a mock draw. He quickly brandished the wand held at his side and threateningly aimed it at an imaginary foe. With a sneer, he taunted, "Make my day."
No more Dirty Harry for him, Hermione thought. She then strolled forward, snagged the towel from Severus' waist and playfully swatted his bare arse.
"You've got to be kidding."
The End
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Detention By Pearle
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
Detention By Pearle
Snape was sitting behind his desk glaring at the class. He was trying to think of a way to make Hermione speak with him. She had been avoiding him since their argument Monday.
Hermione was carefully chopping dragon’s liver. She had no desire to give him any reason to notice her. The sleeve of her robe knocked her quill to the floor. Harry reached over, picked it up, and handed it to her. “Thanks” she said.
That’s it! “5 point from Gryffindor for talking Miss Granger and a detention with me at 7:00 tonight.”
“Detention? You’ve got to be kidding!”
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Final Conversation By amo6524
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
Final Conversation By amo6524
In my time in the wizarding world, I have met sorrow and surpassed it! Now I shall vanquish you, the despicable source of that pain!
I was afraid when I met you on the back of Professor's Quirrel's head. I knew then as now that your power is vast. However, nothing has shown me your evil more than you bringing Hermione Granger and Severus Snape together.
In this moment before our final battle, tell me how you did it.
What?? You didn't do it? You mean... they actually love each other?
Hermione and Snape? You have got to be kidding.
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Kidding?! By Juji
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1987686/1/
Summary: Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley speculate on Professor Severus Snape and winning the house cup. Hermione Granger does her part to assure Gryffindor's victory. Response to the WIKTT "you've got to be kidding" 100 word challenge.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter is © J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros., Inc. and various publishers including, but not limited to, Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books.
Author's Note: My second response to the WIKTT "you've got to be kidding" 100 word challenge. Once this idea hit me, I had to write it. And, now that I have, I am going to be good and go work on my longer WIP fics. Enjoy.
Kidding?! By Juji
"Miss Granger, a word?"
The Golden Trio peered up at the request. Their most reviled professor towered over them with a grim set to his pallid features.
Hermione responded, "Certainly, Professor Snape."
As they departed the Great Hall, Ron muttered, "Snape needs to get shagged." He jokingly added, "Maybe that'd help our chances at the house cup."
"Only if he shagged a Gryffindor," Harry jested back.
A while later, Hermione and Snape returned. Those within hearing distance were stunned when Snape said, "50 points to Gryffindor."
Ron, amidst a large bite of pudding, choked out, "You've got to be kidding!"
The End
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Men Don’t Wear Tights! By Aussie Mel
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
Men Don’t Wear Tights! By Aussie Mel
Severus looked over at the young witch by his side incredulously. Surely she couldn’t be serious. Severus looked between the monstrosity on the bed and his dear wife she was indeed very serious he decided.
“Absolutely not, I refuse to parade around in public wearing that…that…monstrosity” Severus protested mentmently, suddenly at a complete loss of words of how to describe such a torture.
“Severus Snape,” Hermione glaring at the sulking wizard “You will wear it and that is final this is the first Halloween ball since Voldemort’s defeat and the Headmaster wanted to try something different, the least you could do is turn up in costume.”
“I refuse to be seen in tights, besides who wears tights?”
“Peter Pan, Now put them on or we’ll be late!” Hermione snapped.
Glaring at the witch, Severus said the only thing that he could think of when facing the torture of the tights, “You’ve got to be kidding!”
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Middle Age By Pearle
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
Summary: In answer to my own challenge at Wiktt – You’ve Got To Be Kidding 100 Word Challenge.
They had just celebrated their 55th anniversary and her 75th birthday. Wizard’s lived to 200 or more, 75 is considered middle age.
Middle Age By Pearle
They had just celebrated their 55th anniversary and her 75th birt. Wi. Wizard’s lived to 200 or more, 75 is middle age. Still, she hadn’t felt well for a few weeks. Poppy would fix her right up. He was worried waiting for her. Muggle born’s could still get Muggle diseases pureblood wizards didn’t get.
She walked into his office looking dazed and lost.
“What’s wrong? What did Poppy say?” She’s Muggle born. Please, let her be all right.
“Severus…..”
“Hermione, what is it?” Merlin no.
“Severus….”
“What Love?”
“I’m pregnant!”
Severus looked at his wife amazed. “You’ve got to be kidding!”
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Slytherin Big and Proud? By blatantlydisontent
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
Okay, this is the first smut I've ever written, so be gentle. It's the first thing that popped into my head when I saw this challenge.
Slytherin Big and Proud? By blatantlydisontent
“Now that we’re married, let’s get to business,” murmured Severus eyes shining with lust.
“Let’s see if Cyrano DeBergerac was right,” Hermione whispered back in a sultry voice as she ran her hands over the hair on Severus’ chest. Slowly she undid the buttons on the front of her new husband’s dark green dress robes as he pulled her wedding gown over her head. They panted lustily together as she removed first his cotton pants then his checkered boxers.
“Oh, Hermione,” Severus moaned kissing her thoroughly while kneading a plump breast.
Hermione looked down. “You have got to be kidding!”
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The Consequences of Shaving Crooks By Blatantlydisontent
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2003739/1/
Disclaimer: Harry Potter is owned by that one lady with the money. That description doesn't fit me. I don't even own the bathing suit. That's a figment of my imagination. This is in response to the You have got to be kidding 100-word challenge on WIKTT. It was hard to do this in 100 words, so it's really messed up, but w/e.
The Consequences of Shaving Crooks By Blatantlydisontent
"Oh, Severus," Hermione called sweetly as she strode into the livingroom, hands behind her back. "How is my favorite little husband?"
Severus glared at her suspiciously. "It depends. What is my favorite little wife hiding behind her back?"
Hermione grinned. "Remember that masquerade ball Dumbledore is holding? You promised to wear anything I wanted you to after I caught you shaving Crookshanks."
"Say no more," interrupted Severus. "What insidious costume are you making me wear?"
Hermione giggled, pulling out a tiny red two-piece bathing suit that was completely covered in frilly red lace.
"You have got to be kidding."
And there you go. I was going to call it "The Consequences of Shaving Pussy" before I realized that probably wouldn't be a very good idea...
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You Expect That To Fit? By Betz
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
You Expect That To Fit? By Betz
Severus hoped the translation of the ancient Chinese potion was correct.
She was in the bedroom while he gathered his nerve in the bathroom. It would be their first time and he didn't want to disappoint her.
He tipped the vial back and the vile elixir slid down his throat.
His cock began to grow. However, once reaching an impressive size the growth unexpectedly continued.
Hermione, getting impatient, opened the bathroom door and saw his cock was as long as a broomstick and thicker than his arm.
Her jaw dropped in shock as she said, "You've got to be kidding."
A/N: If the challenge was 200 words long, I could have added a few more sentences to add more humor, but I had to REALLY pare this down to fit. One line I *REALLY* wish I could have added was just before the
last sentence. "You expect -that- to fit? You've got to be kidding." I also would have loved to add a few
lines about Severus panicking.
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YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING By fyiagcg
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1978893/1/
Ok, to stick with the new rules set forth by Ashwinder, I’ve done more than just one response to the new ‘you’ve got to be kidding’ 100 word challenge. Below, you’ll find my responses to it. I’ve got 2- 100 word scenes, followed by 2- 200 word scenes, followed by a 400 word scene. I simply couldn’t stop. So, I hope everyone enjoys, please leave a review, even if it is just to tell me to stop writing.
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YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING by fyiagcg
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“Is that a hickey?” screamed Lavender. “It is! Do tell, Hermione! Who was it?”
Hermione just rolled her eyes at her roommates. It was moments like these that she regretted denying the head girl position. What she wouldn’t do for a single room right now. She considered turning around and going right back down to the dungeons, but she figured the girls wouldn’t give up so easily, and the last thing she needed was them following her back down there.
But trying to simply ignore them didn’t deter them one bit.
“You wont tell us? You’ve got to be kidding!”
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Her mind was reeling. A hickey? He had given her a hickey? What part of ‘secret relationship’ was he not understanding?
“It is none of your business who I choose toociaociate myself with,” she stated, trying to infuse her voice with as much of a ‘this subject closed’ tone as her lover.
But when she heard them gasp, and burst into a fit of giggles, she knew something was wrong.
She ran to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. There was no trace of him anywhere. She cursed herself for being so stupid. ‘You’ve got to be kidding.’
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They hadn’t stopped in three weeks. Every morning, it was the first thing she heard. Every night, the last thing she heard before falling asleep to dreams of him. Every mealtime. Every break in between classes. Sometimes they’d even pass her notes during class time. ‘Who is it? Who is it?’
Who ‘Was’ it was more likely these days. It had spread around the school like a wildfire that Hermione was seeing someone, but that she wouldn’y why who. So except for a detention a few days after she’d been caught, when they made the mistake of passing her a note during potions, she hadn’t had a second alone with him.
She was sick of it. She hated the constant questioning, and she missed him. It was during lunch on a Saturday when she lost it, stood up screaming, pointing at the head table. “It’s Snape, ok? I’m in love with Severus Snape!”
She froze, shocked by herself, when she realized the entire hall was looking at her. Then she heard it from every corner; Draco Malfoy, Albus Dumbledore, Susan Bones (the damn head girl), and her two roommates, among others, all exhaling in unison. “You’ve got to be kidding.”
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“How long, Severus?”
“About six months now, headmaster. But we’ve only just let it turn physical recently. Before then we talked a lot. It wasn’t until a few months in that we even knew there was something more than friendship. It took a while for both of us to admit that there was an... attraction. Even then, it was a while before...”
“Stop right there, dear boy. Just because I always seem to know everything, does not mean I need to be told everything.”
“Sorry sir. I understand. I apologize for the inconvenience, and I know what I have to do. I will have my things out by the end of tonight. I will leave a copy of my lesson plan and release all the wards before I go.”
“Tell me something, Severus. With her outburst, Miss Granger said she loved you. Did you know this?”
“No, sir. I didn’t.”
“And do you love her?”
“Yes, sir. I think I do.”
“Then I can only wish you my best. You aren’t sacked, Severus. You’ve still got a job. And Miss Granger will not be expelled or anything of the sort.”
“You’re giving me your blessing? You’ve got to be kidding.”
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He stepped ou the the Headmaster’s office and found himself staring at the end of Potter’s wand, almost touching the tip of his nose. Next to him stood his redheaded sidekick, whose wand was inches from Severus’ heart.
They seemedry. ry. He decided the best way to deal with them would be a quick deduction of house points, followed by a scowl and some turning and striding, maybe even a bit of billowing robes, for effect.
But Potter, like his father, had something to say. “Whatever you’ve done to her, take it back. We don’t want you hurting our friend, you evil, ugly bastard. If you’ve hurt her, I’ll...”
But Potter stopped talking, both foolish boys being distracted by their wands flying out of their hands and into that of the one person Severus wanted to see most.
“Boys! How dare you! You couldn’t stop to let me explain anything to you or be there for me when the rest of the Great Hall swamped me, you had to run off and be some kind of bloody heroes!”
And with that she threw their wands down the hall and pushed them out of the way. She only seemed to have lost that Gryffindor courage once she was face to face with him. “I’m so sorry,’ she began., ‘I didn’t mean...”
She didn’t get much further into her sentence, as he had found a while ago that the best way to stop her talking was witkisskiss. After a good, long while, she pulled away, shocked.
“Hermione, did you mean it? Are you in love with me?”
“Severus, I am. I love you.”
“Good. Because the Headmaster just gave us his blessing, with the words, let me see, what did he say? Oh, yes, ‘if you two have found love and happiness with each other, I can not see any reason to stop you.’”
“His blessing? With each other? Does that mean you’re not sacked? You’re not furious with me?”
“Yes, yes. And no, on both accounts. What I mean to say... I love you, too, Hermione. And neither of us is going anywhere.”
Harry and Ron stood and watched the exchange, and when the kissing began again they finally turned to go collect their wands. The embracing couple couldn’t be positive, but they were pretty sure they heard someone mumble “Snape and Hermione, in love. You’ve got to be kidding.”
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The You’ve Got To Be Kidding 100 Word Challenge
They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. With that in mind (And a tip of the hat to Kate for the Unbelievable 100 Word Challenge). I would like to issue my own 100 word challenge. So, here it is:
Rules:
1. It should be Severus Snape and Hermione Granger.
2. In 100 words, you should tell a story that logically ends with the words, “You’ve got to be kidding!”
3. Fluff, angst, romance, smut, whatever. You decide.
4. The challenge ends at midnight September 8th, 2004.
You may enter as often as you like. Good Luck!
Questions, comments, whatever can be directed to: PearleVision9240@aol.com
Regards,
Pearle
Summary: Various author's responses to The “You’ve Got To Be Kidding” 100 Word Challenge on Wiktt. HG/SS
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Here are the responses to date for The “You’ve Got To Be Kidding” 100 Word Challenge. Authors and the locations of the response are listed for each response. The rnsesnses are listed alphabetical according to the title. The challenge rules are listed at the end.
Please note: if you do not see your response to the challenge here it is because I do not have a link to your response in the challenge folder. If you will e-mail me I will be glad to add it.
Note: Please do not email me to inform me that some of the responses are not exactly 100 words. Some are a bit over, one or more words. It is not up to me to edit the responses, I am merely posting them for others to enjoy. I appreciate each and every person who took the time and energy to answer my challenge. Each one is an enjoyable read and creative in it’s own right.
Enjoy!
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Disclaimer: The characters, settings, etc. of the Harry Potter series are not mine they belong to J.K. Rowling and Co. I promise to return them when I am through. Well, most of them anyway.
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A Slightly Strange Situn Byn By Lady Tuesday
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
*** I decided to write a little snippet that isn’t included in my fic, “Silk Stalkings” … but really could be … as a part of the “You’ve Got to Be Kidding” challenge at WIKTT ***
(PS – If you haven’t read Silk Stalkings, it will still make sense, but you should go read it anyway cuz it’ll be much funnier .)
A Slightly Strange Situation By Lady Tuesday
“Unhand me this instant,” Severus growled at the young woman currently heaving at a pair of black fishnet tights.
Hermione sighed and continued her work, slapping away his hands periodically. “Give over, I’m doing my job,” she said, exasperated. She continued adjusting and moving the stockings, but something just didn’t look quite right. She couldn’t put her finger on what it was … then it hit her. Hermione scuttled out of the room, returned with a razor and said, “It’ll have to go.”
“What?”
She looked down ruefully at his rather hairy legs.
“You’ve got to be kidding!” he roared.
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A strange creature By Nici1807
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1983639/1/
Disclaimer: Nothing mine. Everything belongs to JKR, except the plot. This is my response to the KIDDING Challenge on WIKTT. Thanks to my Beta CallistaEvans for her help!!
A strange creature By Nici1807
She was in need of help and that very soon. The only person in the library was unfortunately. "P. "Professor Snape! Please come. Hurry! I need your help!”
“What happened, Miss Granger?”
"Professor Granger!” She better suppress this comment. "There is something disgusting in the hall."
He snorted. Together they left the library. Severus started laughing. She gave him an unappreciative look. In the distant there was much smoke and odd laughter sounded from grey creatures with red wings. Her body tremble.
"Professor Granger, these are only Hagrids new donkeydragons."
"What?"
"Don-key-dra-gons."
"You've got to be kidding!"
The End
If you know “Shrek2", you will realize the Donkeydragons. I'm from Germany and no native English speaker, but I hope, I translated everything correct and the text is logical.
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An Unexpected Card By Imhilien
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1985285/1/
An Unexpected Card By Imhilien
Being quite practical at eighteen, Hermione is nevertheless surprised by the falling card by her plate on Valentines Day. The card is devoid of gushing sentimentality, with an anonymous, carefully worded expression of affection for her. Despite the efforts of the writer, she recognizes the handwriting and a lump comes to her throat. Hermione had noticed his oddly hesitant behavior around her these days and glancing towards the High Table she sees a watching Professor Snape with wariness and hope in his dark eyes. Her faint look of revulsion wounds a heart.
She muttered, “You’ve got to be kidding!”
********************************
In another version Hermione’s day goes like this……
********************************
Being quite practical at eighteen, Hermione is nevertheless on the verge of blushing as shads ads her Valentines Day card. Despite the efforts of the writer, she recognizes the hand that wrote the anonymous and carefully worded expression of affection for her. Glancing towards the High Table she sees Professor Snape watching her with his eyebrows slightly raised. The card he is holding is a bright pink, but it was the only one she could find for him in Hogsmeade. Despite her careful efforts he has recognized her handwriting.
He mouthed, “Pink? You’ve got to be kidding!”
A/ hav have written two responses to this challenge, or rather, two different ways that Hermione responds on Valentines Day when she receives an unexpected card.
A/N 2: Yes, I am working on the next chapter of ‘Roads’. But these 100 word challenges with their accompanying plot bunnies are very persuasive……
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Dirty Severus By Juji
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1985405/1/
Summary: Hermione stumbles upon a scene she was not quite prepared for - semi-naked Severus and his wand. Response to the WIKTT "you've got to be kidding" 100 word challenge.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter is © J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros., Inc. and various publishers including, but not limited to, Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books.
Dirty Severus By Juji
Propping herself against the doorframe for much needed support, Hermione struggled to muffle her laughter while watching her oblivious husband posture for the rooting restroom mirror.
"Oh, you big bad Slytherin! Again!"
Egged on by the mirror, the newly appointed DADA professor entered a mock draw. He quickly brandished the wand held at his side and threateningly aimed it at an imaginary foe. With a sneer, he taunted, "Make my day."
No more Dirty Harry for him, Hermione thought. She then strolled forward, snagged the towel from Severus' waist and playfully swatted his bare arse.
"You've got to be kidding."
The End
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Detention By Pearle
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
Detention By Pearle
Snape was sitting behind his desk glaring at the class. He was trying to think of a way to make Hermione speak with him. She had been avoiding him since their argument Monday.
Hermione was carefully chopping dragon’s liver. She had no desire to give him any reason to notice her. The sleeve of her robe knocked her quill to the floor. Harry reached over, picked it up, and handed it to her. “Thanks” she said.
That’s it! “5 point from Gryffindor for talking Miss Granger and a detention with me at 7:00 tonight.”
“Detention? You’ve got to be kidding!”
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Final Conversation By amo6524
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
Final Conversation By amo6524
In my time in the wizarding world, I have met sorrow and surpassed it! Now I shall vanquish you, the despicable source of that pain!
I was afraid when I met you on the back of Professor's Quirrel's head. I knew then as now that your power is vast. However, nothing has shown me your evil more than you bringing Hermione Granger and Severus Snape together.
In this moment before our final battle, tell me how you did it.
What?? You didn't do it? You mean... they actually love each other?
Hermione and Snape? You have got to be kidding.
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Kidding?! By Juji
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1987686/1/
Summary: Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley speculate on Professor Severus Snape and winning the house cup. Hermione Granger does her part to assure Gryffindor's victory. Response to the WIKTT "you've got to be kidding" 100 word challenge.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter is © J.K. Rowling, Warner Bros., Inc. and various publishers including, but not limited to, Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books.
Author's Note: My second response to the WIKTT "you've got to be kidding" 100 word challenge. Once this idea hit me, I had to write it. And, now that I have, I am going to be good and go work on my longer WIP fics. Enjoy.
Kidding?! By Juji
"Miss Granger, a word?"
The Golden Trio peered up at the request. Their most reviled professor towered over them with a grim set to his pallid features.
Hermione responded, "Certainly, Professor Snape."
As they departed the Great Hall, Ron muttered, "Snape needs to get shagged." He jokingly added, "Maybe that'd help our chances at the house cup."
"Only if he shagged a Gryffindor," Harry jested back.
A while later, Hermione and Snape returned. Those within hearing distance were stunned when Snape said, "50 points to Gryffindor."
Ron, amidst a large bite of pudding, choked out, "You've got to be kidding!"
The End
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Men Don’t Wear Tights! By Aussie Mel
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
Men Don’t Wear Tights! By Aussie Mel
Severus looked over at the young witch by his side incredulously. Surely she couldn’t be serious. Severus looked between the monstrosity on the bed and his dear wife she was indeed very serious he decided.
“Absolutely not, I refuse to parade around in public wearing that…that…monstrosity” Severus protested mentmently, suddenly at a complete loss of words of how to describe such a torture.
“Severus Snape,” Hermione glaring at the sulking wizard “You will wear it and that is final this is the first Halloween ball since Voldemort’s defeat and the Headmaster wanted to try something different, the least you could do is turn up in costume.”
“I refuse to be seen in tights, besides who wears tights?”
“Peter Pan, Now put them on or we’ll be late!” Hermione snapped.
Glaring at the witch, Severus said the only thing that he could think of when facing the torture of the tights, “You’ve got to be kidding!”
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Middle Age By Pearle
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
Summary: In answer to my own challenge at Wiktt – You’ve Got To Be Kidding 100 Word Challenge.
They had just celebrated their 55th anniversary and her 75th birthday. Wizard’s lived to 200 or more, 75 is considered middle age.
Middle Age By Pearle
They had just celebrated their 55th anniversary and her 75th birt. Wi. Wizard’s lived to 200 or more, 75 is middle age. Still, she hadn’t felt well for a few weeks. Poppy would fix her right up. He was worried waiting for her. Muggle born’s could still get Muggle diseases pureblood wizards didn’t get.
She walked into his office looking dazed and lost.
“What’s wrong? What did Poppy say?” She’s Muggle born. Please, let her be all right.
“Severus…..”
“Hermione, what is it?” Merlin no.
“Severus….”
“What Love?”
“I’m pregnant!”
Severus looked at his wife amazed. “You’ve got to be kidding!”
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Slytherin Big and Proud? By blatantlydisontent
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
Okay, this is the first smut I've ever written, so be gentle. It's the first thing that popped into my head when I saw this challenge.
Slytherin Big and Proud? By blatantlydisontent
“Now that we’re married, let’s get to business,” murmured Severus eyes shining with lust.
“Let’s see if Cyrano DeBergerac was right,” Hermione whispered back in a sultry voice as she ran her hands over the hair on Severus’ chest. Slowly she undid the buttons on the front of her new husband’s dark green dress robes as he pulled her wedding gown over her head. They panted lustily together as she removed first his cotton pants then his checkered boxers.
“Oh, Hermione,” Severus moaned kissing her thoroughly while kneading a plump breast.
Hermione looked down. “You have got to be kidding!”
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The Consequences of Shaving Crooks By Blatantlydisontent
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2003739/1/
Disclaimer: Harry Potter is owned by that one lady with the money. That description doesn't fit me. I don't even own the bathing suit. That's a figment of my imagination. This is in response to the You have got to be kidding 100-word challenge on WIKTT. It was hard to do this in 100 words, so it's really messed up, but w/e.
The Consequences of Shaving Crooks By Blatantlydisontent
"Oh, Severus," Hermione called sweetly as she strode into the livingroom, hands behind her back. "How is my favorite little husband?"
Severus glared at her suspiciously. "It depends. What is my favorite little wife hiding behind her back?"
Hermione grinned. "Remember that masquerade ball Dumbledore is holding? You promised to wear anything I wanted you to after I caught you shaving Crookshanks."
"Say no more," interrupted Severus. "What insidious costume are you making me wear?"
Hermione giggled, pulling out a tiny red two-piece bathing suit that was completely covered in frilly red lace.
"You have got to be kidding."
And there you go. I was going to call it "The Consequences of Shaving Pussy" before I realized that probably wouldn't be a very good idea...
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You Expect That To Fit? By Betz
Located: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/whenikissedtheteacher/files/Fanfiction/-%20Fic%20Challenges%20-/Running%20-%2004-09-08%20-100%20words/
You Expect That To Fit? By Betz
Severus hoped the translation of the ancient Chinese potion was correct.
She was in the bedroom while he gathered his nerve in the bathroom. It would be their first time and he didn't want to disappoint her.
He tipped the vial back and the vile elixir slid down his throat.
His cock began to grow. However, once reaching an impressive size the growth unexpectedly continued.
Hermione, getting impatient, opened the bathroom door and saw his cock was as long as a broomstick and thicker than his arm.
Her jaw dropped in shock as she said, "You've got to be kidding."
A/N: If the challenge was 200 words long, I could have added a few more sentences to add more humor, but I had to REALLY pare this down to fit. One line I *REALLY* wish I could have added was just before the
last sentence. "You expect -that- to fit? You've got to be kidding." I also would have loved to add a few
lines about Severus panicking.
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YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING By fyiagcg
Located: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1978893/1/
Ok, to stick with the new rules set forth by Ashwinder, I’ve done more than just one response to the new ‘you’ve got to be kidding’ 100 word challenge. Below, you’ll find my responses to it. I’ve got 2- 100 word scenes, followed by 2- 200 word scenes, followed by a 400 word scene. I simply couldn’t stop. So, I hope everyone enjoys, please leave a review, even if it is just to tell me to stop writing.
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YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING by fyiagcg
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“Is that a hickey?” screamed Lavender. “It is! Do tell, Hermione! Who was it?”
Hermione just rolled her eyes at her roommates. It was moments like these that she regretted denying the head girl position. What she wouldn’t do for a single room right now. She considered turning around and going right back down to the dungeons, but she figured the girls wouldn’t give up so easily, and the last thing she needed was them following her back down there.
But trying to simply ignore them didn’t deter them one bit.
“You wont tell us? You’ve got to be kidding!”
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Her mind was reeling. A hickey? He had given her a hickey? What part of ‘secret relationship’ was he not understanding?
“It is none of your business who I choose toociaociate myself with,” she stated, trying to infuse her voice with as much of a ‘this subject closed’ tone as her lover.
But when she heard them gasp, and burst into a fit of giggles, she knew something was wrong.
She ran to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. There was no trace of him anywhere. She cursed herself for being so stupid. ‘You’ve got to be kidding.’
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They hadn’t stopped in three weeks. Every morning, it was the first thing she heard. Every night, the last thing she heard before falling asleep to dreams of him. Every mealtime. Every break in between classes. Sometimes they’d even pass her notes during class time. ‘Who is it? Who is it?’
Who ‘Was’ it was more likely these days. It had spread around the school like a wildfire that Hermione was seeing someone, but that she wouldn’y why who. So except for a detention a few days after she’d been caught, when they made the mistake of passing her a note during potions, she hadn’t had a second alone with him.
She was sick of it. She hated the constant questioning, and she missed him. It was during lunch on a Saturday when she lost it, stood up screaming, pointing at the head table. “It’s Snape, ok? I’m in love with Severus Snape!”
She froze, shocked by herself, when she realized the entire hall was looking at her. Then she heard it from every corner; Draco Malfoy, Albus Dumbledore, Susan Bones (the damn head girl), and her two roommates, among others, all exhaling in unison. “You’ve got to be kidding.”
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“How long, Severus?”
“About six months now, headmaster. But we’ve only just let it turn physical recently. Before then we talked a lot. It wasn’t until a few months in that we even knew there was something more than friendship. It took a while for both of us to admit that there was an... attraction. Even then, it was a while before...”
“Stop right there, dear boy. Just because I always seem to know everything, does not mean I need to be told everything.”
“Sorry sir. I understand. I apologize for the inconvenience, and I know what I have to do. I will have my things out by the end of tonight. I will leave a copy of my lesson plan and release all the wards before I go.”
“Tell me something, Severus. With her outburst, Miss Granger said she loved you. Did you know this?”
“No, sir. I didn’t.”
“And do you love her?”
“Yes, sir. I think I do.”
“Then I can only wish you my best. You aren’t sacked, Severus. You’ve still got a job. And Miss Granger will not be expelled or anything of the sort.”
“You’re giving me your blessing? You’ve got to be kidding.”
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He stepped ou the the Headmaster’s office and found himself staring at the end of Potter’s wand, almost touching the tip of his nose. Next to him stood his redheaded sidekick, whose wand was inches from Severus’ heart.
They seemedry. ry. He decided the best way to deal with them would be a quick deduction of house points, followed by a scowl and some turning and striding, maybe even a bit of billowing robes, for effect.
But Potter, like his father, had something to say. “Whatever you’ve done to her, take it back. We don’t want you hurting our friend, you evil, ugly bastard. If you’ve hurt her, I’ll...”
But Potter stopped talking, both foolish boys being distracted by their wands flying out of their hands and into that of the one person Severus wanted to see most.
“Boys! How dare you! You couldn’t stop to let me explain anything to you or be there for me when the rest of the Great Hall swamped me, you had to run off and be some kind of bloody heroes!”
And with that she threw their wands down the hall and pushed them out of the way. She only seemed to have lost that Gryffindor courage once she was face to face with him. “I’m so sorry,’ she began., ‘I didn’t mean...”
She didn’t get much further into her sentence, as he had found a while ago that the best way to stop her talking was witkisskiss. After a good, long while, she pulled away, shocked.
“Hermione, did you mean it? Are you in love with me?”
“Severus, I am. I love you.”
“Good. Because the Headmaster just gave us his blessing, with the words, let me see, what did he say? Oh, yes, ‘if you two have found love and happiness with each other, I can not see any reason to stop you.’”
“His blessing? With each other? Does that mean you’re not sacked? You’re not furious with me?”
“Yes, yes. And no, on both accounts. What I mean to say... I love you, too, Hermione. And neither of us is going anywhere.”
Harry and Ron stood and watched the exchange, and when the kissing began again they finally turned to go collect their wands. The embracing couple couldn’t be positive, but they were pretty sure they heard someone mumble “Snape and Hermione, in love. You’ve got to be kidding.”
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The You’ve Got To Be Kidding 100 Word Challenge
They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. With that in mind (And a tip of the hat to Kate for the Unbelievable 100 Word Challenge). I would like to issue my own 100 word challenge. So, here it is:
Rules:
1. It should be Severus Snape and Hermione Granger.
2. In 100 words, you should tell a story that logically ends with the words, “You’ve got to be kidding!”
3. Fluff, angst, romance, smut, whatever. You decide.
4. The challenge ends at midnight September 8th, 2004.
You may enter as often as you like. Good Luck!
Questions, comments, whatever can be directed to: PearleVision9240@aol.com
Regards,
Pearle