Pancake Pandemonium

Disclaimer: I don't own them

Rating: R/NC17

For the November Food Challenge: This is not the first time I'm writing slash or fanfiction, but it is the first time I'm attempting a challenge. Forgive me if this sucks.



Generally, it took a lot to shock Draco Lucialfoalfoy, but as he stood in the kitchens after hours gaping at his rival, he had to hand it to him. He was utterly flabbergasted. Approaching his arch nemesis carefully, he could feel the beginnings of a severe twitch developing in his right eye.

"Uh, Potter? At the risk of sounding stark raving mad--of which I'm sure you're quite familiar--just what on EARTH are you wearing?!"

Harry James Potter looked up from the stove he was standing at and arched one dark eyebrow at the blonde Slytherin. "Uh, look who's calling who crazy. You're the one in therapy, Malfoy, not me."

Draco cringed and restrained himself from strangling the insufferable prat in front of him. He had to remind himself three times that his doctor would be very upset if he harmed anyone else. After that unfortunate incident in Honeydukes with that little boy, Draco feared that one more screw up and he'd be shipped off to St. Mungos faster than you could say: Harry Potter Sucks! "Yes, Potter, but at least I can blame the crazy things I do on my medication! What's YOUR excuse? I mean, what in Merlin's name are you doing?"

"Making pancakes."

"But in--in THAT?!" Draco gestured wildly at the other boy as he spooned the pancake batter into the sizzling frying pan.

Harry concentrated on getting each pancake as round as possible. "I don't see anything wrong with it. Everyone wears them."

Heart failure was also not something that Draco experienced on a daily basis, but at the other teen's response, he felt as if one was coming on. "Potter, you're wearing girl's underwear."

Harry glanced down at his toned, slender frame and cocked one hip out. "Huh, so I am. It's a little snug though." He twirled around for Draco to get a better view of the red, sequined thong riding up his firm ass. "Do you like it?"

"Oh. My. God. Potter, have you lost your bloody mind?!" Draco shouted in an attempt to divert attention awaom hom his bulging crotch. Potter looked strangely appealing wearing the thong and cooking pancakes. Pancakes just happened to be Draco's favourite breakfast food. But he hated Potter, right?

"Lost a bet actually." Harry muttered and flipped the first batch of pancakes onto a platter. He poured more batter into the hot griddle and Draco almost moaned. There was something so erotic about his rival standing there at the stove, pouring the pancake batter into the pan, flipping the half finished cakes onto the other side to cook...starting the whole sexy performance over again. Harry flipped a finished cake onto the platter next to him, but as he turned back to pan, the spatula slipped out of his grip. "Fuck me!" Harry snapped impatiently and bent over to retrieve the errant cooking tool from the floor.

Draco's mind completely melt down.

Potter's firm, round ass seemed to be calling to him; inviting him to play. The thong seemed to disappear right between the tan globes and--wait a minute--Potter didn't seem to have a tan line ANY-FUCKING-WHERE and yes, he really needed to lay off his pills. Surely taking five hits a day was overdoing it, right? Surely this was the reason he was becoming so lightheaded. He watched as Potter's fingers were about to reach out and grasp the cooking utensil and a little demon told him to get his wand out and...

...with a little flick, he sent the spatula skidding across the floor. Potter groaned in frustration and went scurrying after it; his ass jiggling enticingly. Draco was seriously horny by then and really wanted to show Potter what happened when you went cavorting around school wearing nothing but a girl's thong! Finally, Potter retrieved the spatula and headed back to the stove. As he was pouring more batter into the pan, he spoke casually.

"Would you like some, Malfoy? I have to make these for the other Gryffindor 7th years as part of the bet. But you can have some if you like. I don't mind sharing."

"Yes," Draco purred, coming to stand right behind his rival at the stove. His erection strained to get free from his pyjama bottoms and he pressed up against Harry's back. "I would definitely like some, Potter. You offering?"

Harry tensed up a little and then sighed; grinding his ass back into Draco's hard cock. "Yeah, I'm offering."

"Good" Draco growled.

Before Harry could blink, he was suddenly lying onearnearby table with Malfoy sliding the thong off his willing body. The blonde boldly stroked Harry's manhood, causing the Gryffindor to close his eyes and cry out in pleasure. Harry felt an odd sensation on his chest and abruptly looked down. Draco was carefully placing warm pancakes all over his heaving chest. Then, when he was done, the Slytherin grabbed a bottle of maple and pumpkin syrup and drizzled it up and down the pancakes.

Harry blinked. "And you say I'M crazy?"

"Shut up. And don't move or you'll mess up my creation." Draco then drizzled syrup all over Harry's huge cock and then tossed the bottle aside. Without warning, he spread Harry's toned legs and engulfed his cock in one swift movement. Harry wanted to scream. Malfoy's hot mouth licked and sucked at his throbbing shaft hungrily, causing the Gryffindor to arch his back and thrust upwards repeatedly.

"Oh fuck yes, Malfoy. Suck it harder."

Draco tried to hold the writhing form he was ravishing still so as not to upset the sticky cakes plastered to Harry's suntanned body, but the other teen was like a man possessed. Harry bucked and thrust into Draco's mouth, drilling it steadily and forcef. I. It was all the blonde could do to hold on.

"Yes, yes, yes, yes. oh Merlin. Yes! Malfoy...please...harder...I'm so close."

With a shout, Harry came deep inside Draco's talented mouth, spurting jet after jet of creamy goodness. Mixed with the syrup, Draco thought H was was the best he'd ever tasted--not that he'd done this before mind you. It was merely an observation. As Harry tried to regain some semblance of composure, Draco crawled up his body and proceeded to eat the syrupy pancakes off of his rival's flushed and sweaty body. Harry whimpered slightly and just lay still, enjoying the feel of Draco's tongue licking the syrup off of his skin. Finally, Draco reached Harry's mouth and lovingly kissed it. Parting his mouth, Harry allowed his nemesis' tongue to stroke his own and the two battled for dominance. They were interrupted a short time later by someone coughing by the kitchen entrance. Both boys turned to see Professor Snape standing there....in a green sequined g-string. It was hard to tell what embarrassed him more. Finding the boys in their compromising position, or his current state of dress (or undress).

Draco gaped. "What the bloody FUCK are you wearing?! I mean what is this? Panties on Parade Night at Hogwarts?!"

Harry just gazed in sympathy at the dark professor. "You too, huh?"


~Fin