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Mowing Weeds

By: tifsuz
folder Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Snape/Hermione
Rating: Adult +
Chapters: 1
Views: 3,724
Reviews: 44
Recommended: 0
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Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Mowing Weeds

Disclaimer: I own them! They are mine, all mine! EEP!

*beats lawyers back with a large stick*

Alright! Alright! I don\'t own anything. *sob* Do you have to rub it in?


Mowing Weeds


\"Severus, what the fuck is wrong with you today!?!?\"

\"I have no idea, you have to help me! I suffer the most appalling nightmares. I am being forced to act worse than even Lucius, and for some reason, I can\'t shake the image of myself being jerked around like a puppet on strings by a large breast! The worst part is -\"

\"A huge boob?\"

\"Exactly! Now if I may finish?\"

He was met with silence.

\"Very well. As I was saying, I have apparently raped you and -\"

Snickers were heard at this proclamation.

He sighed, \"You have something to add?\"

\"Well, besides the fact that I would be wearing your balls for earrings while you bled to death if you had ever tried to attack me, I was just thinking... you can\'t rape me darling, I\'m only too willing to play our games.\"

He grinned, \"If I ever make it through my explanation, I may make you prove that. Anyway,\" This was stressed with a hard look, \"you behave in a most unbecoming manner during these... night horrors.\" He shuddered just thinking of it. \"You run around weeping, forgiving everyone in sight. Not only that, there is a child from the attack -\"

\"Fuck that. If you think I would -\"

\"I did state that these images were nightmares did I not? Now if you would allow me to finish! Not only I am I complete and utter bastard to this child, whom by the way seems to be possesed by something very unchild-like, you continuly thrust this little sprog in my face and are the worst mother I have ever heard of! I mean really, I treat this thing worse than my students!\"

She had to laugh at this, \"That bad?\"

He shuddered again, \"You have no idea. Plus there is you, behaving as a complete and utter snivelling doormat. I can\'t take it anymore!\"

She moved over in the bed to embrace him tightly. \"Severus, they are just meaningless nightmares. I can see why they wouistuisturb you though. Besides the wholly unrealistic portrayl of yourself, the thought of having myself act in such a manner is enough to give me nightmares too! Thankfully I will never be such a woman. I mean really, could you ever see yourself respecting and loving a doormat?\"

\"Of course not my dear. If I was that kind of a man, you would have killed me long ago, coming up with a very clever cover story.\"

More laughter. \"No, I\'d let it go just far enough to leave a few marks. That and a pensieve would be enough to acquit anyone.\"

\"Have a told you lately how much I love your clever, devious mind?\"

She grinned wickedly as she pulled him down to her. \"I think you could remind me again. Maybe we could even come up with a few....distractions, to get rid of those nightmares of course.\"