Desires

Harry, Hermione, and Ron sat together at the beginning of term feast,
as they had for the past six years. The starttheitheir seventh year at
Hogwarts was to have been one of great expectation and promise. They
sat instead in silence, an oasis of quiet amidst the noise and bustle
of the rest of the Gryffindors. It had been a summer of change for the
trio, and none of them was entirely sure how to react. Lest of all
Harry, who felt alien to the other Gryffindors, and more alone than he
had ever felt before. For the first time since their second year, Harry
had felt the odd man out. Ron and Hermione were definitely a couple,
and he was not. Harry wasn\'t interested in joining Ron and Hermione,
with them, but he wished for someone to spend time with, other than in
the platonic way that had taken over his life. Yet he had no idea how
to go about it. Not that he had ever done anything. Ron would have
killed Harry if he had done anything serious with Ginny, and he and Cho
had been so wrapped up in their mutual grief that things hadn\'t gone
any further than a quick feel after a cry. Cho had promptly dumped him
for Neville and Harry was once again alone.

For Ron and Hermione, their relationship had deepened over the summer.
They had been able to spend a great deal of time together, first when
Ron visited Hermione and her parents, and later when Hermione joined
Ron and the rest of the Weasleys at the Burrow for the last two weeks
of the summer holidays. Harry joined the Weasleys for those two weeks,
but the time had been different. Harry and Ron had not spent hours
talking Quidditch, trying out the twins latest novelty or even lazing
about the grounds surrounding Bur Burrow. Instead, Ron and Hermione had
paired off constantly, leaving Harry to follow along behind. They tried
to make sure that Harry hadn\'t felt like the odd wheel out, but Harry
felt obligated to give his friends some privacy and made a concerted
effort to leave the two alone whenever possible. He been reduced to
explaining to Arthur Weasley the various Muggle devices that Ron had
brought back with him, from his trip visiting Hermione. Even on trips
to the local pub, Harry, inevitability, was left waiting at the table
for Ron and Hermione to return from a groping session in the bushes or
the alleyway behind the pub. He hadn\'t even been able to interest a bar
girl into to meeting with him for a session next to the lavatories.
Even complete strangers knew what an utter prat Harry was with the
opposite sex. It did not help that Ron and Hermione had it all figured
out.

It seemed his two best friends had discovered the wonders of sex. Even
Ginny, on the rebound from years of Harry worship, apparently dating
him for a few months had cured Ginny of that particular want, was now
seeing Coliarryarry had tried to corner Ginny into talking with him
over the fortnight to see what he had done wrong, but Ginny had taken a
page from Percy\'s book and had spent most of the vacation holed up in
her room owling Colin. There were the occasional sessions with
Hermione, but for the most part Ginny had avoided him. The one and only
time Harry had been able to get Ginny to say anything it had done
nothing to bolster Harry\'s spirits. Ginny said to him that he had
gotten more excited about the new Quidditch brooms than b wit with her.
She continued by stating that she preferred being with someone who
didn\'t yawn when kissing her. Matters had not been helped by the fact
that soon after this conversation, Fred had brought home the new
Thunderfast 6000, a broom designed especially for Beaters. Harry had
turned from the conversation he had been having with Ginny to the
broom. It wasn\'t for several hours later that he\'d thought to look for
Ginny and found her in her room, writing another long message to Colin;
probably detailing every aspect of the fact that he was a total and
complete prat thought Harry.

Harry knew that the entire Weasley household, for that matter, the
entire population of Hogwarts was probably having sex. The garden
gnomes looked happier than he was. Harry was certain that he was the
only celibate seventeen year old on the planet. It did not help that
Harry found himself thinking back to that day when he had been out with
the Dursleys and his life had changed, or at least his perceptions of
it. He hadn\'t been looking for it, he hadn\'t wanted it, but by the time
he reached the Weasleys this past summer, it had been all that he could
think about. Harry hadn\'t been able to think of much else, the very
least of it being, why Ginny Weasley thought he preferred broomsticks
over her.

Harry looked at the main table, and focused on the figure that had
drawn his gaze since the start of the feast. Professor Snape; Potions
Master, all around bastard, and since this past summer, the subject of
more of Harry\'s thoughts than he would ever like to admit. Harry
ignored Ron and Hermione playing with each other\'s feet under the
table, even though they kicked him occasionally, and looked to Snape
under hooded eyes as his mind cast back to the moment where his life
spiraled out of control.

********
Harry accompanied the Dursleys to London. Normally he remained behind,
but since the unfortunate accident with Aunt Petunia\'s geraniums, the
Dursleys had been loath to leave hione.one. In addition, Mrs. Figg had
disappeared with her cats to parts unknown, despite Harry\'s protests
that a sitter was unnecessary for him, the Dursleys dragged him along
on the expedition. Therefore, Harry was with them as they went to
London in search of school clothes for Dudley. Dudley had outgrown his
Smeltings uniform. Actually, Dudley had ballooned to mammoth
proportions and had taken to wearing sweat pants and trainers the last
few months of the term as he had split all his uniforms in two. He had
managed to intercept all the correspondence between the school and his
parents so they hadn\'t known of his condition until he had arrived home
on break. Fortunately, Aunt Petunia hadn\'t seen anything wrong,
declaring, \"Her precious Dudleykins had taken on another growth spurt,
didn\'t he look handsome and would he like a treacle tart?\"

Harry personally thought that Dudley looked like a beached whale, but
his opinion wasn\'t wanted. But here he was, accompanying the Dursleys
has they made their way through the streets of London on their way to
purchase clothing for his cousin, who waddled alongside, huffing and
puffing as he swayed side to side. It wasn\'t just school clothes;
Dudley was in need of everything, from underwear, everyday clothes and
then his school uniform. Dudley was a state unto himself.

They came to a shop called \"Mr. Grossman\'s Shop for the Above Average
Son.\" Aunt Petunia declared it ideal as Dudley was indeed \'A Very
Special Young Man.\' They went into the shop and Harry spent what felt
like an eternity as the tailor measured Dudley for his new clothes. The
measure wouldn\'t fit around Dudley\'s massive thighs that made Harry
wonder if even the magical measure at Ollivander\'s would work on his
rotund cousin. Personally, he didn\'t think so. After two hours had
passed, Harry idled up to his Uncle and asked if he could step outside
for an instant. Vernon had agreed, stating that if Harry missed the
family as they left London he could \"Jolly well walk back to Little
Whinging.\" Since the likelihood of Harry, missing two people who
resembled large beach balls next to one that looked like a twig were
about one million to one, he had agreed.

Harry walked up and down the street, thankful that his cousin was such
a brat, even outside the shop he could hear Dudley as he complained
that this fabric itched, that fabric chafed and the third wasn\'t
flattering. Looking to the windows, a sight behind him caught his eye.
There were two men kissing behind him. They weren\'t just kissing. They
looked to be devouring one another. One was a bit shorter than the
other was and their chests pressed into one another. Their legs seemed
to intertwine. If Harry had been older, he would have termed it erotic,
but he wasn\'t, so he was embarrassed and aroused. His face flushed and
he couldn\'t tear his eyes away from the men. The taller of the two had
his hands on either side of his companion\'s face. Their mouths moved
hungrily over each other, Harry imagined if he had been closer that he
could have heard the moans, he was sure the men were making. The
shorter one had his hands up and under the leather jacket, the taller
man was wearing. The taller man\'s black hair hung around his face and
his leg pressed closer between the shorter man\'s legs as the other ran
his hands under the jacket, across his back, coming to rest on his
waist. Harry watched the reflection of the two men in the glass as they
moved together. He felt his face grow flushed and hot as the men
continued to kiss and caress one another. His eyes focused on the
taller of the two men. The way his hair fell around his face; the long
fingers on his companion\'s face; his shoulders framed by the black
leather on a jacket that hung loosely past his waist ane moe motions of
the hands on his back and waist. The men fit together so well.

Harry bit his lower lip and wanted that. He wanted those fingers on
him, the hard chest pressed to his, the leg that looked like it was
pressing right against the other man\'s cock and the smell and feel of
that leather. The way the men fit together felt so right. It was as
though Harry had been clobbered by a bludger, he\'d gotten it. This was
why his sort of relationships with Cho and then Ginny hadn\'t worked.
He\'d known. He had. He didn\'t wake up in a sweat and feeling his sheets
sticking to him in the aftermath of an orgasm after dreaming of breasts
and girls and long hair, sugar and spice. He\'s woken up more times than
he could count, trembling in the aftermath of a dream that involved
faceless figures that loomed above him, hard chests and images of
himself bent over with his arse filled. Someone thrusting into him, a
hard chest pressed against his back, the sweat dripping down onto him,
and hands that clutched his while a mouth breathed hot air into his
ear. He\'d concluded that these dreams did not feature Voldemort.
Sometimes he wished they had, and sometimes he\'d awoken trembling with
desire, not knowing what he wanted. Well, he known, but he really
hadn\'t wanted to admit it. Out loud. For everyone to hear, least of all
himself, so he denied the dreams, talked about girls and never once
said anything to anyone about the dreams of hard chests, and men or
anything else.

However, he\'d never seen anything like this before. The reality of
watching two men kiss and move together in a way that he\'d never even
dreamt of, it was one hundred times better than the faceless fantasies
he\'d been having. He couldn\'t take his eyes from them. He began to
breathe harder as the men moved together, oblivious to the observer
watching them from the window. It felt so right, what he wanted, what
he needed, every desire he hadn\'t knew he had was spelt out in front of
him in the tableau reflected in the window glass. The men were pressing
against one another while leaning on a phone booth, as though their
combined weight would send them to the ground. One more than the other
drew his attention. From the long lean body, the leather encasing the
torso and the fingers wrapped around the other man\'s face. The sheer
power that the man contained within his body, drew Harry like a moth to
a flame. He wanted to be consumed by that passion and fire within.

Harry jerked forward unexpectedly and almost fell to the ground as the
Dursleys made a mass exit, bumping into him on the way out. With the
exception of Aunt Petunia, none of the Dursleys could fit in the
doorway with another person, and each of them seemed to take a visceral
pleasure in bumping into Harry on the way out of the store. Petunia
piled bags of Dudley\'s new accessories onto Harry and beckoned him to
follow her back to the car. As Harry followed them back to the car, he
turned for one final look at the two men. They had parted and were
looking at each other, still entwined, hands on each other\'s face.
Harry had to stop in shock. Because the taller man, the one in the
amazing leather jacket, who had the other man\'s hands all over him,
who\'d been kissing another man right on the lips for everyone to see.
That man, the one that made Harry\'s stomach clench up, the man was
Snape; Severus Snape, and Harry hadn\'t been able to take his eyes off
him.

He still couldn\'t. Harry sat at the table with Ron and Hermione and
watched Snape. Snape as he ate; Snape toss his hair a bit and those
long, elegant fingers cut his meat. Snape glare at the incoming First
Years. Snape as he applauded the Slytherins and nod to Draco Malfoy.
Harry wished for an instance that he hadn\'t been so adamant about not
being put in Slytherin. If he had been sorted there, Snape wouldn\'t
automatically hate him. Harry stared at Snape with such a focus that
Draco noticed and pulled Snape\'s attention to the Gryffindor table.
Harry found himself blushing red as Snape looked up and glared right at
Harry. Harry ducked his head down and interrupted the game of footsie
between Hermione and Ron as he tried to escape Snape\'s glare.

He couldn\'t help but feel jealous of the unknown man who kissed Snape,
ran his hands over a long, lean body and knew what to do. With another
man, it looked the same as a girl, but Harry hadn\'t been particularly
good at that, if he listened to the school gossip, and he hadn\'t. Not
really, but everyone else had. For weeks, Harry had been subject to
buttons that flashed on and off whenever he entered a room. Buttons
that listed Harry\'s deficiencies as a lover, or at least a kisser and
groper, Harry hadn\'t felt anything while touching the girls, and thanks
to Snape, he\'d finally realized why. It didn\'t make it any easier, but
at least Harry thought he could get it right if he had a lover that at
the very least aroused him. All he\'d felt while dating the girls had
been mild curiosity at their chests and mouths, nothing exciting had
happened to him. Harry thought back on his feelings at the time and
realized that must have been his first clue as to the homosexual thing.


Ron and Hermione led the Gryffindor first years up to the Common room
and their dormitories. As Harry followed, he wondered if Ron even
realized he was giving the same speech that Percy had given them upon
their arrival at Hogwarts as first years. He doubted it. Once the first
years were settled, Harry looked forward to a game of chess with Ron,
it wasn\'t to be, however, he looked around to find that Ron and
Hermione had ducked out, leaving Harry in the Common room with Neville
and Seamus. He and Seamus settled down for a game of chess before
Trevor jumping on the chessboard and the chess pieces attacking the
toad interrupted them. Declaring the game an utter loss, Harry and the
others went to the dorms to sleep. At least Neville and Seamus did,
Harry went to the room he shared with Ron and stopped dead at the sight
of the necktie on the door. Dragging a book from the Common room, Harry
settled down in a chair to wait. It was past two in the morning when he
looked up to see Ron with a sheepish look come down to the Common.
Harry grinned back at Ron and went up to the room. Harry thought that
Ron would look more contrite if he didn\'t have a mark on his neck from
Hermione.

\"Look Ron, we\'re going to have to figure out some sort of schedule for
this. I mean, I\'m not, I don\'t care, but Lavender won\'t let me bunk
with her and I might need the room as well.\"

\"Harry, you haven\'t had a date in months, is there anyone who interests
you?\"

\"Well, maybe\"

\"Who?\" Ron said with amusement. \"Susan Bones, Millicent, McGonagall?
Come clean Harry, who\'s the lucky one this time?\"

Harry figured that Ron wouldn\'t be up to hearing about Professor Snape,
so the subject needed to be changed. Fast.

\"Ron, we need to figure something out for the times you and Hermione,
and even me want to use our room for privacy.\"

At this Ron began to laugh, \"Harry, you haven\'t needed a room for
privacy in months, what makes you think that you will need it any time
in the near future.\" Harry gave Ron a look previously reserved for
Voldemort and various Slytherins, \"hope, my luck has got to change at
some point,\" said Harry.

Ron gave Harry a grin as the two settled down for the night.

*********
Several weeks passed into the term. Things had settled down into a
routine. Classes, Quidditch and the thrice a week trip to library as
Ron and Hermione used their room. Harry never really wanted to know
what they were doing. The one and only time he\'s gotten a bit mad was
when they had used his bed instead of Ron\'s bed. One month into the
term came the lecture legends were made of, sexual education with
Madame Pomfrey. The Weasley twins had laughed themselves silly for a
week after their class. Nevertheless, for Harry and most of the
students, they were both embarrassed and excited for the class.
Hermione was heard to grumble, however, that the class had been needed
two years prior, but said Professor McGonagall, \"tradition was
tradition.\"

That Thursday, the upper levels of all four houses filled into the
Great Hall and sat at their respective tables. The ceiling reflected
the somber nature of the subject as only the arches looked down upon
the students. Standing before all the tables was Madam Pomfrey with a
stern look on her face. As the lecture began, most paid careful heed to
her words. Hermione, in particular, applied the same care to this
subject as she did to all her classes. She took copious and detailed
notes, much to Ron\'s chagrin. His embarrassment deepened when Hermione
copied down the diagram of a woman\'s vagina, labeled, with arrows
pointing to the various parts. \"She hasn\'t taken any notes on,\" Ron
commented to Harry while blushing and said in a sotto voice, \"the
penis.\'\' Unfortunately, Hermione heard the comment, \"Ron, if you cannot
say penis without turning red, why do you want me to handle it all the
time?\" Ron made a chocking noise, which drew Madam Pomfrey\'s attention
to the trio, \"Was there something you had to say, Mr. Weasley?\" Ron
made a choking sound as his head hit the desk, fortunately or
unfortunately, as might be the case, Hermione voiced a question.

\"Madam Pomfrey, you\'ve covered everything to do with heterosexual sex,
what about homosexual activities?\"

At Hermione\'s comment, the hall silenced from all the slight whispers
and comments that had permeated the discussion. Madame Pomfrey looked
to Hermione and continued, \"I know you are Muggle-born Miss Granger, so
I understand your ignorance in this matter. Homosexuality is strictly a
perversion. It is not tolerated, nor is it accepted.\"

\"But why,\" Hermione questioned, as she continued, \"I mean, well, why is
so wrong.\"

\"Well, obviously Miss Granger,\" Madame Pomfrey answered, \"Homosexuals
do not contribute anything to our society. They do not produce children
and it is common knowledget hot homosexuals are known to commit
unlawful acts.\"

\"But,\"

\"Enough, Miss Granger, if you desire further knowledge, or have any
other questions, please refer to the reference section of the library;
there are volumes about it under common perversions. Also, may I direct
your attention to your head of house; she might be willing to answer
any other questions you might have instead of you taking up precious
time in this lecture.\"

Hermione turned beet red and looked to answer Madam Pomfrey, until Ron
shushed and calmed her down. Neither of them noticed that Harry had
paled at Pomfrey\'s words. It didn\'t feel like a perversion, just him.
Harry thought back to that day in London when he had seen Snape kissing
that man, towards the end, just as Harry was leaving and he had turned
for one final look at the two men, Uncle Vernon had followed Harry\'s
gaze. Looking at the sight of the two men in each other\'s arms, he had
muttered \"bloody fairies\" under his breath. Moreover, had dragged
Dudley quickly away from the sight that had so entranced Harry; he
thought with his return to Hogwarts, that he\'d escaped all the hatred
that surrounded him at the Dursleys. However, it wasn\'t so; it seemed
that Harry while accepted as the Boy Who Lived might be in trouble if
he became the Queer Boy Who Lived. The doors to the Great Hall opened
and in walked Professor Snape, robes flowing and billowing behind him.
He went up to Madam Pomfrey and they held a quick conversation after
which Pomfrey addressed the students; \"unfortunately, there has been a
minor accident in Professor Snape\'s third year Potions class. As I am
needed in the infirmary, Professor Snape will be happy to remain here
and answer any remaining questions you might have.\" As Poppy left the
hall, Snape turned and glared at the assembled students. Any questions
anyone might have had died upon seeing the sneer that graced the
Professor\'s lips. Even the Slytherins paled at the thought of asking
their head of house how to find the clitoris. Snape looked
extraordinarily pleased at the expressions on the students\' faces. He
settled down in front of them, daring the class to ask him anything.
Even Hermione was subdued by the thought of debating sexual politics
with Snape. Snape\'s lips compressed into a hard line as he glared out
at the students, unlike the other students, Snape knew the value and
the power in silence. He had a tendency to do it just to unnerve the
class it always worked. Harry couldn\'t stop his tongue from darting out
and licking his lips as he imagined those lips on his, devouring him
and astounding him.

Snape took in the silence of the students and said, \"Dismissed,\" in his
quiet voice that carried through the room.

Harry, Ron and Hermione left the hall together. They had some free time
before dinner and Ron gave Harry a silent, pleading look. Harry laughed
and nodded at the two and made his way up to the library. Once there,
he avoided the helpful looks Madam Pince was giving him and went in
search of the books Madam Pomfrey had mentioned. It was well into
dinnertime when Harry finally looked up from the texts. After reading
what the information contained within the pages, he really didn\'t feel
up to supper. What he wanted to do was talk it over with someone.
Unfortunately, he didn\'t know whom to talk it over. If the books were
correct, and Harry decided to live as a homosexual, he would never be
accepted within Wizarding society, he would be an outcast. Harry
shelved the books and made his way down the staircases and to the Hall.
He caught sight of Hermione and Ron sitting together and sat down
besides them. Hermione gave him an affectionate push and Harry smiled
back at her. He decided to put the entire matter out of his mind. He
was only seventeen. It had only been in the past year that he had even
begun to think about men in a sexual way. Perhaps if he never thought
about it again, he wouldn\'t have to worry about it. What was that
phrase Aunt Petunia used when stuffing him in the closet? \'Out of
sight, out of mind\' that\'s what he would do, not think about it at all.

Later that evening, as Ron trounced Colin at chess, Harry dragged
Hermione off to a classroom for a chat. Before he could begin, Hermione
started talking to him. \"Harry thanks for being such a sport about Ron
and me. You know we\'ll do the same for you when you get yourself a
girlfriend.\" She stated, laying her hand on Harry\'s leg and leaning
into him.

Harry gave a sickly smile to Hermione, tried to grin and agree with
her. Things would be much better if he found a girlfriend. His life
would be a simple thing if he didn\'t have to worry about the fact that
he wasn\'t thinking about getting into a girl\'s knickers. His life would
be paradise if he weren\'t thinking about Snape, leather and kissing.

When had his life ever been simple?

*******
Potions class became the bright spot in Harry\'s life. He could watch
and listen to Snape without anyone wondering if he was insane. He had
to listen to Snape. Harry loved it. Unfortunately, due to all the
listening he was doing in class, he wasn\'t getting any detentions.
Harry thought of mucking up a potion just to get detention, but due to
an unfortunate accident in Charms, Gryffindor was now down 150 point to
the other houses. In addition, the Ravenclaw Quidditch team had gotten
a new Seeker this year and was in strong contention for the Quidditch
cup. Harry thought that if he lost points on purpose, his house would
have him strung up by his nails.

Fortunately, Ron and Hermione saved Harry after dinner. Hermione went
off to the library to pick up an obscure text on Transfigurations, and
Ron cornered Harry on the way to the Common room.

\"Harry, would it be possible for you to leave for a few hours tonight?
Since term started, Hermione and I haven\'t been able to get any time
together. And the first Hogsmead weekend isn\'t for two weeks. Would you
mind?\"

Perfect, thought Harry, \"Sure, but you better stay off my bed this
time.\"

Ron laughed, hit Harry on the arm, and followed him into Gryffindor
saying, \"I wonder if I can borrow those diagrams Hermione made? They
might be useful in the long run.\" They laughed together and sat in
front of the fireplace as evening came over the castle.

Around two hours later, Harry found himself making his way through the
corridors of the dungeon on his way to Snape\'s office. He wasn\'t going
to look for Snape, nor, Harry thought, was he going to spy on, stalk,
or lurk around looking for Snape. He just needed a place to relax and
rest for a few hours and the library was too drafty. The dungeons are
such a warm place to be, thought Harry, with a sense of irony.

er ter than he thought, he found himself at the door to Snape\'s, which
was closed fast. Harry sank to the flooder der his invisible cloak with
his arms around his knees, resting his head against his arms. This was
not going well towards the plan. Even though Harry wasn\'t sure exactly
what the plan was, he was certain that it did not involve sitting in
the dungeon corridors whilst freezing and his roommate was messing
around with Hermione, probably on Harry\'s own bed. None of his plans
for this evening had involved this. Sitting on the cold stones of the
dungeons, without really knowing why he was here, just with a vague
plan that involved Snape and Snape\'s body. Harry wasn\'t sure how this
would happen, but he had faith that it would. He wasn\'t a Gryffindor
for nothing, he was renowned for his ability to think fast in a
situation. All he had to do was overcome the butterflies and slight
feeling of nausea he seemed to have and carry out his plan, whatever
that was. It just wasn\'t fair, everyone else seemed to know what to do
when it came to sex, Harry supposed with the Dursleys as role models he
was at a slight disadvantage, but even Vernon and Petunia had managed
to procreate, but, if Harry were determined to take this route, he\'d be
childless as well.

Harry didn\'t have much time to ponder upon the inequities of life.
Snape\'s door slammed open and out came the man himself, robes billowing
and walking at a fast clip towards the Slytherin dormitories. Harry
peeked inside the office and saw a cup of tea, open parchments and
something strange boiling in the background. He took a wild guess and
figured out that if Snape had left the office in disarray, he was sure
to be back at some point tonight. Harry went inside the office and
waited against the bookcases filled with very strange and scary bottles
and objects. Unlike the warm welcoming and inviting feeling of
Dumbledore\'s office, Snape\'s made one want to cringe. It was not a
place inviting to the soul. Harry was certain that if Snape had a say
in the matter, he would have liked to pickle a person\'s soul and
display it in the place of honor behind the desk. Looking to some of
the bottles, he wasn\'t sure Snape didn\'t have something like a soul in
a jar. There were some very strange things in the office.

Harry knelt down and waited. After what seemed to him to be an
interminable time, in billowed Snape, again. The door slammed shut
behind him and Snape moved to his desk in long, purposeful strides. He
sat down behind the desk, took a sip of the tea, grimaced, tossed the
tea in a plant that looked very dead, and poured a fresh cup from the
strange boiling thing behind his desk. Obviously, a Snape instrument
for boiling tea that did not resemble anything used by mere mortals.
Snape sniffed the tea once, his mouth quirked once and he sipped at the
tea. He then picked up the quill and began to write on the parchment.
For the longest time the only noise heard was the sound of Snape\'s
quill scratching against the paper, broken only by the soft sound of
Snape sipping his tea. His hair had fallen forward and framed his face;
Harry couldn\'t remove his eyes from the sight of Snape working at his
desk. He was so involved with the image of Snape, that he didn\'t
realize that the figure at the desk had made a noise. It had, Snape had
looked up and was speaking to the wall. Not just the wall, but his gaze
and voice directed right to the space that Harry occupied under his
invisible cloak. Harry jerked out of his Snape worshiping to hear that
magnificent voice that filled the room, and as soon as Harry woke up
enough to realize it, was directed at him. Snape was speaking to him,
as he sat, under the invisibility cloak, in Snape\'s office; with no
real reason to be there other than, he wanted to stare at the
Professor.

Harry was a horrible liar.

\"Mr. Potter\" and Snape had managed to drag the word \'Potter\' into
three syllables that rolled off the tip of his tongue. However, Snape
was saying more, so Harry had to focus back on to reality and not the
fantasyland that he was becoming so fond of residing in.

\"Mr. Potter,\" Snape repeated.
\"Umm, yes?\" replied Harry from under the cloak.

\"Do become visible, Mr. Potter.\" Drawled Snape as he drank some tea and
looked directly at Harry.

Harry took the cloak off and stared sheepishly at Snape behind the
desk. Snape stared at Harry and gestured at the chairs in front of him.
Harry rose to his feet, held the cloak clutched in his hands and sat in
the chair to Snape\'s right and stared at the desktop. His eyes focused
on Snape\'s long fingers interlaced on the desk and started as Snape
spoke again.

\"Mr. Potter,\" again drawing his name out into many syllables, \"perhaps
you would be so kind as to tell me what you are doing in my office,
without an appointment, lurking behind an invisibility cloak that had
the unfortunate luck to pass from one generation to another of hapless
Gryffindors?\"

\"Sir? I\'m not really sure what you want me to say.\" This settled it;
Harry was not going to impress Snape with his quick wit. Harry thought
about trying to seduce Snape, but given Harry\'s current frame of mind,
he would probably make a complete hash of it. So sitting in a chair,
clutching his cloak to his body seemed to be the best option, and the
least embarrassing, this was prior to when Harry began to answer
Snape\'s questions. Later, much later, Harry would wish that he had
chosen option two. However, hindsight, while useful, is nothing more
than wishful thinking and a dream. The outcome of this conversation was
nothing like Harry had imagined.

\"Sir?\" repeated Harry, because his brain had taken a vacation into the
Dark Forest and he had no idea how to go after it, because students
were supposed to stay away from the dark forest and not tramp about
merrily in it. Something that Harry was sure he would learn to do by
the time he left Hogwarts. \"How did you know I was here, Sir?\" he
asked.

Snape, in lieu of a reply, smirked, took another sip of tea and looked
at Harry, \"I was under the impression that I was asking the questions
here, Mr. Potter. And the matter before us is what you are doing
sneaking around in my office this evening.\"

\"I wasn\'t really sneaking Professor, the door was open when I came in,
and I was just sitting against the wall,\" replied Harry.

\"Uninvited, unexpected and I warrant, with the full expectation that
you would not be noticed. So for the final time Mr. Potter, what are
you doing here?\" With that, Snape leaned forward and towards Harry, who
was so startled he blurted out the first thing that came to mind; which
in Harry\'s case happened to be the truth.

\"Ron and Hermione needed my dormitory room to make out in and I had to
vacate it for a few hours because Lavender won\'t let me in hers, so I
came down here.\"

Whatever Snape had been expecting Harry to say, that was not it. At
least that was what Harry thought. Due to Snape\'s long and varied
career as a spy for Dumbledore, he did not react at all. His eyes might
have blinked, but Harry would never be sure if he had imagined it. As
it was, Snape took a sip of tea, looked at Harry and asked; \"yet again
I must ask you Mr. Potter, the proclivities of Miss Granger and Mr.
Weasley aside, what drew you here this evening. Surely, you had better
things to do than skulk around in my office while your roommate is
otherwise, involved. So I repeat, why come here?\" With that, Snape put
his elbows on the desk and leant forward to Harry, arms crossed with
his head slightly tilted.

Harry swallowed and continued, \"Well, I think I\'m gay, so I came down
here.\"

At that, Snape did the one thing that Harry never thought he would do,
Snape laughed; not a little snicker, not a chuckle, but a full on laugh
that shook Snape with the force of the noise. Harry looked at his feet
while he waited for Snape to regain control.

\"And this concerns me in what way, Mr. Potter?\"

\"Well, you\'re a homosexual, and I thought I could, talk to you about
it.\"

Harry\'s words sobered Snape up instantly, thus crushing Harry\'s hopes
that Snape would swoop down upon him and take him on the desk that very
instant.

\"And how exactly, Mr. Potter, did you come about to speculate about my
private life, and what on earth would draw you to that conclusion?\"

Harry swallowed, took a deep breath and answered, \"Because I saw you
Professor.\" Snape looked at Harry with hooded eyes as Harry continued
with the tale of his summer of seeing Snape.

Harry wound down and finished as Snape continued to stare at him. The
seconds of silence stretched in to minutes and Harry fought the urge
not to squirm as Snape stared at Harry. Finally, Snape began to speak,
as though he was thinking aloud, \"Mr. Potter, only recently having had
the infamous lecture on the sexual practices of Wizards, now thinks he
is a homosexual. Regardless of the fact that homosexuality is not
tolerated either at Hogwarts or within proper,\" and at that word, Snape
couldn\'t help the contempt coloring his words, \"society, has now
invaded the inner office of his most hated teacher to confess, what,
that Harry Potter, probable homosexual, wants to chat with the
aforementioned Professor? Alternatively, is it form of blackmail? What
exactly do you want Mr. Potter? You have me over the proverbial barrel
as it where. So what may I do for you?\"

Harry hadn\'t really thought that far. The thought that Snape would
immediately take Harry\'s confession as a means of foreplay had been in
the forefront of Harry\'s mind, there wasn\'t an immediate option two in
the field of play. However, Harry did try.

\"I thought; maybe I might ask you some questions, get some advice,
something Professor. This isn\'t something I can ask my classmates
about, and I know about you, so I just thought,\" Harry trailed off, as
he really had no idea what else to say. Snape wasn\'t having any of the
problems that plagued Harry.

\"Mr. Potter, I teach Potions at Hogwarts. Not as you might think,
Homosexuality for Young Wizards, do try to remember this on your way
out of my office. Good night Mr. Potter.\" With that, Snape stood up and
gestured Harry towards the door. Harry followed Snape\'s command and
went to exit the office. At the doorway he turned to face Snape again,
\"Professor,\" he began.

\"Enough, Mr. Potter, leave now.\" Snape said, dismissing him with a wave
of his hand. Harry soon found himself outside Snape\'s door, making his
way back up to Gryffindor under the cover of his cloak. Harry resolved
never to do that again.

The promise that Harry had made to himself lasted all of two days.
Harry\'s dreams filled with images of Snape, in leather, in his office,
drinking tea, writing and finally kissing Harry. Harry was quite
thankful for the last one as he was beginning to believe that he had
some bizarre fetish to get off while Snape worked. Thankful that wasn\'t
the case, Harry had gone to Potions class after the discussion in
Snape\'s office with a large amount of trepidation. He shouldn\'t have
worried. Snape ignored him to his usual degree and managed to reduce
Neville to tears with one well-placed insult.

Harry was impressed. Three days after the first confrontation with
Snape, Ron came to Harry again with a sheepish look, Harry\'s cloak in
hand and asked that Harry make himself scarce for a few hours. Harry
wandered in circles around the castle, the concentric circles bringing
him nearer to Snape\'s office with every turn. Finally, even Harry
couldn\'t deny it and found himself again outside of Snape\'s office.
With the stealth of years of sneaking into places he shouldn\'t, Harry
edged the door open a tad and slipped inside. Snape was nowhere in
sight, but again there was the cup on the desk and the parchments at
the ready. Harry sat himself against the door and waited. He would
never be sure at what point he fell asleep, but he did, on the floor of
Snape\' office. He jerked awake, unsure of the amount of time that had
passed, just aware that it was terribly late. Looking around, Harry
peeked in the teacup and saw the curdled milk. The pot of tea had grown
cold. Harry took a final look around the room and left to go back to
his chambers. Crawling back into bed, he curled into a ball as he
wondered what would make Snape disappear for so long. His fears were
soon answered as his scar began to hurt immediately as he closed his
eyes. Harry sighed and made his way back out the Gryffindor rooms to
the Headmaster\'s office. Patting the gargoyles, with a quickly mumbled
\"Smarties,\" Harry made his way up the stairs. As usual, the Headmaster
was waiting for Harry. However, there wasn\'t much to tell Professor
Dumbledore, aside from the obvious, his scar hurt. Harry hadn\'t seen
anything this time, just the pain of his scar, which usually indicated
that Voldemort was having a gathering and planning for the annihilation
of all things not Voldemort approved. Since Harry was at the top of
that list, he always reported the scar\'s twinges to the Headmaster, not
that there was always something to do, but it helped to have someone
else know about it. Professor Dumbledore helped lay Harry\'s mind to
ease and sent Harry back along his way with a smile and a cup of hot
chocolate. As Harry made his sleepy way back to the dormitories, he
gave a sigh, thankful that the weekend was next and he wouldn\'t have to
face classes the next day.

Harry slept well into the next day. It wasn\'t until supper that he was
able to look for Snape again, and there he was, at the Head Table,
looking just as sour as ever. Snape turned from his conversation with
Professor McGonagall to glare at Harry, which caused the Slytherins
watching Harry to beam with joy. There always seemed to be a few
students who put Harry under constant surveillance these days. Although
no one was brave enough to attack Harry directly, he was sure that his
movements were reported to the parents and then on to Voldemort. Harry
quickly turned his attention to Ron and the ongoing Quidditch
discussion. Trying to put Snape and the last discussion he had with Snape
out of his mind, Harry found himself failing miserably. He had a vague
idea what gay sex entailed, but in terms of the practical matters about
it, he really had no clue. He wasn\'t interested in a grope in the
showers. He couldn\'t figure out how to broach the subject matter. It
had been embarrassing enough when he had been dating girls. At some
point the gossip in the school had reached even him regarding his
sexual prowess, or lack of knowledge in that area. Harry had been
dismayed to find out that the girls actually compared notes on how he
kissed. The news that he was gay wanted to go around with boys and was
interested the entire matter was guaranteed to fly around the school in
a matter of minutes if he tried to approach anyone for a test snog.

So, anyone in his class, the class below him or in anyway related to
Harry himself was out. There was no one Harry could trust to be
discrete in the matter, save one person, Snape. He wouldn\'t tell, and
Harry could have some fun, enjoy the thing and get it over and done.
All he had to do was make Snape listen to reason. Something that Harry
hadn\'t been able to do in the seven years he had been at Hogwarts. He
just needed to wait for the opportunity to arise. Therefore, with a
purpose and plan in mind, Harry made his way back to Snape\'s office and
waited to enter.

The door opened of its own accord and Harry walked in. He wasn\'t
surprised to find Snape seated at his desk, looking at Harry. He
gestured to the chairs and Harry sat down.

\"Mr. Potter, I was under the impression that you had no further need of
me. Your coursework in Potions has been barely adequate of late, but is
enough for you to pass, what other reason could you have for slinking
down here again?\"

\"What if I\'m gay?\" Harry began with no preamble. Better, he got to the
point before Snape tossed him out on his ear.

Snape regarded Harry with those dark eyes that revealed nothing, \"Mr.
Potter, I thought I\'d made it clear that I have no interest in guiding
you through this matter. Why are you persisting in this course of
action?\"

\"I really don\'t have anyone else to talk to sir. I can\'t go looking for
someone to test this all out on. I was bad enough when those badges
came out every time I kissed a girl.\" Harry winced, as Snape gave a
small smile at the memory of the buttons his Slytherins had created.
Snape sighed and stood up to begin pacing the room. He stopped
abruptly, placed his hands on the desk and leaned into Harry.

\"What exactly do you want to know?\"

\"Well, what did you do?\"

\"Mr. Potter,\" Snape said with a sneer, \"this matter has little to do
with me. I can tell you that if you choose to follow this path, it\'s
not an easy one. You\'ll get little sympathy or acceptance. If you
actually want my advice, forget about these momentary feelings, grow
up, marry a nice witch and have a few screaming brats, fulfill the
expectations everyone has of you.\"

\"I thought this wasn\'t a choice. Isn\'t it something I just am?\"

\"You have the choice whether or not to walk this path. It will be,\"
Snape paused, \"easier on you if you don\'t act on these impulses. Either
way Mr. Potter, choose, take an action and follow through with it. You
can dabble in this, it is acceptable to fool around while in school and
then forget about it upon leaving. You can then walk down to path that
hundreds of others have done before you and put it down to schoolboy
experimentation. If, however, you choose to live as a practicing
homosexual, understand that it is a life that requires discretion,
something I have yet to see in all my years at Hogwarts.\"

\"I don\'t want to lie to myself Professor,\" Harry said, standing to meet
Snape\'s eyes.

\"Then don\'t, go find a nice playmate and have some fun, Mr. Potter,
simply do me the favor and cease these excursions into my office.\"

\"I won\'t.\" Harry said. \"I want to be with you.\"

Snape gave a harsh laugh and looked to Harry while he retreated into a
far corner of the office. He leaned against the wall and looked to
Harry, \"Don\'t be a fool Mr. Potter, why on earth should I even accept
what you are saying as truth?\"

\"Because it is,\" said Harry looking to Snape in the shadows, \"I can\'t
do this with anyone else. I don\'t want to do this with anyone else.
I\'ve been thinking about you since I saw you in the street. I want
that.\" During Harry\'s confession, Snape had moved close to Harry until
they were standing face to face, in front of the desk.

\"What exactly do you want to happen here Potter? What do you want to
do?\" asked Snape as he leaned closer to Harry.

Harry blinked at Snape\'s proximity, shrugged, and said, \"You know.\"

\"Potter, if you won\'t state what you want, you have no business
thinking you can do anything except play with yourself in a bed that
Mr. Weasley defiled with Miss Granger.\"

\"Everything, anything, with you, I just want to feel something.\" Harry
said.

Snape leaned closer to Harry, his mouth almost against Harry\'s, close
enough so that Harry could feel Snape\'s breath warming his face,
against his cheek. Snape trailed a finger against Harry\'s face and
pulled it to his. His mouth closed over Harry\'s, Harry instantly knew
the difference between this kiss, and the others he had shared with the
girls he had dated. This kiss went straight into his body. It connected
directly to hisk ank and back to his head. He panted into Snape\'s mouth
as Snape moved his hand behind Harry\'s head and pulled him closer to
his body. Harry\'s hands went to Snape\'s waist and around his back. His
fingers clenched and grabbed on Snape\'s coat, trying to burrow their
way into Snape\'s body. Harry felt both of Snape\'s hands move to either
side of his face. The fingers moved up and into his hairline, rubbing
at his forehead. Snape\'s tongue plunged into Harry\'s mouth and he bit
lightly on Harry\'s bottom lip. Snape reached down and pulled his mouth
from Harry\'s lips. Harry tried to follow Snape\'s movement, but Snape\'s
thumb stilled his movement as his other hand plucked Harry\'s glasses
off his face and tossed them on the desk. Snape pulled Harry back into
the embrace of his arms and kissed him again, pushing Harry into the
edge of his desk.

Harry gasped against e\'se\'s mouth, as Snape\'s other hand pulled Harry
against his body. Held in place by Snape\'s hands, pressed against each
other, Harry could feel Snape\'s hardness as he ground against Harry.
His own erection was trapped in his pants and against Snape\'s leg. It
pressed uncomfortably in its confinement. Harry moved one hand from
behind Snape\'s back and squeezed it between them. His mouth left
Snape\'s as he looked down to his zipper and fought to pull it down to
release his cock. He felt himself propelled backwards as Snape pushed
him up against the wall. Snape pushed Harry\'s hand away as his hand
replaced Harry\'s one. Harry\'s arms clutched the outsides of Snape\'s
arms as he felt Snape\'s hand open his trousers, and rub his penis
through his underwear. Harry gave a sob as Snape pushed his pants and
underwear down until they pooled around his ankles. The cool air raised
the hair on Harry\'s legs as it also caressed his balls and cock.

Harry tried to twine his legs with Snape\'s but felt Snape push him back
as Snape\'s hand moved to his own fly, undid it, removing his cock from
the confines of his pants. Snape grabbed one of Harry\'s hands and
placed it on his penis, circling his cock with their hands and moving
their joined hands over his penis. Harry\'s eyes widened and his breath
came in hard short breaths as his hand circled and moved over Snape\'s
cock. He could feel the penis, hard in his hand already wet with
precome. Snape moverry\rry\'s thumb over the head of his cock, down the
shaft and back again, effectively masturbating himself, using Harry\'s
hand.

Harry\'s own penis moved and twitched with his actions. He tried to rub
his cock against Snape, but Snape\'s hand on Harry\'s arm kept him at a
distance. Harry looked down at Snape\'s penis between them and the head
that moved in and out of Harry\'s fist as he circled and moved up and
down the shaft. Snape let go of Harry\'s hand and moved both his hands
to either side of Harry against the wall. He spread his legs a little
and pushed into Harry\'s hand. His mouth came down against Harry\'s head
and Snape kissed the side of Harry\'s neck. Harry\'s legs were trembling
and he shook with the strain of trying to hold himself upright.

Snape reached down and removed Harry\'s hand from his cock. He moved his
mouth again to Harry\'s and his tongue plunged into Harry\'s mouth and
thrust furiously into it.
One hand moved to Harry\'s crotch, while the other went to Harry\'s
chest, pinching Harry\'s nipple through his shirt. The hand at Harry\'s
crotch went directly over Harry\'s penis and applied pressure to it.
Harry was so excited that he gave a short yell, and came over Snape\'s
hand in four short hard pulses. Snape\'s mouth broke from Harry\'s and he
looked into Harry\'s eyes as he brought his come-coated hand to his
mouth. Harry\'s eyes widened as he watched as Snape licked all the
traces of come from his owngersgers. Drawing each finger into his mouth
and sucking on it slowly and thoroughly. Throughout the move, Snape\'s
eyes never left Harry\'s face and his mouth twitched in amusement as
Harry\'s eyes grew larger and brighter at the sight of Snape\'s fingers
in his mouth with a fistful of Harry\'s semen.

Harry swallowed as he felt Snape\'s saliva covered hand rest on the side
of his face. He looked down to see Snape\'s hard cock between them; he
felt Snape\'s hand pulling him down as Snape sank to the floor taking
Harry with him. They ended up on the floor, Harry kneeling over Snape,
his pants and underwear still around his ankles. Snape pushed his pants
down a little and his cock stood erect between them, Snape spread his
legs a bit and pulled Harry up and into his chest, his hand reaching
around to the back of Harry\'s head as he kissed Harry once again. Harry
rested his hands on Snape\'s shoulders and straddled him as he kissed
S aga again. Harry was quickly become addicted to the taste of Snape in
his mouth. Snape leaned back against the wall a little more and the
hand at the back of Harry\'s head gave him a little push down. Harry
followed the movement Snape was requesting of him and found himself
staring directly at Snape\'s cock. Harry\'s hand moved once again to the
shaft and he ran his hand up and down feeling the veins and the
hardness of Snape\'s penis beneath his hand. Under him, Snape shifted
again and his cock moved in Harry\'s hand, brushing against Harry\'s
chin. Harry looked at Snape, and then bent down and sucked the head of
Snape\'s penis into his mouth. Harry\'s hand was beneath his mouth,
holding Snape steady. The head was salty, sweet and when Harry stuck
the tip of his tongue into the slit at the head of Snape\'s cock, he
heard Snape moan and grab Harry\'s head with both hands. Snape held
Harry\'s head steady and began to make small thrusts into Harry\'s mouth.
Harry just held onto the base of Snape\'s cock and one of his thighs and
went along for the ride.

Harry felt one of Snape\'s hands leave the back of his head and move to
his cheek. Snape\'s fingers rested on the side of Harry\'s face and where
Snapstedsted his fingers, he could feel where his cock moved in and out
of Harry\'s mouth. The idea of Snape feeling where his cock was in
Harry\'s mouth made Harry moan and his own penis harden once again.
Harry pushed his hand down over his own cock as his other hand
continued to hold onto Snape\'s penis while his mouth moved over the
head of Snape\'s cock. Harry sucked on Snape\'s cock, moving his head to
the rhythm dictated by Snape\'s hands, when he felt Snape pull him up.
Snape drew Harry against his chest and rolled them both over until they
were lying on the floor, legs entangled with the other. Harry\'s legs
fought the confinement of his pants as his arms reached up and pulled
Snape down to him. Harry ran his hand up the back of Snape\'s neck and
into his hair. Snape rolled slightly off Harry and pushed his pants
further down and his shirt up. He then undid the buttons of Harry\'s
shirt so when he rolled back, their bare chests met together. Snape
angled himself over Harry until their cocks aligned with each other and
began to thrust against Harry\'s cock and stomach. Snape\'s head went to
Harry\'s neck and kissed the juncture between Harry\'s shoulder and neck.
Harry arched into Snape\'s body, trying to push their bodies closer
together. He settled for moving his hands to Snape\'s arse and pushing
it down and into him. Harry\'s fingers slid into the crack between
Snape\'s cheeks and he heard Snape give a deep groan and push hard up
into Harry\'s fingers and then back into his body, coming all over
Harry\'s stomach and chest. Harry felt Snape\'s semen hit his skin and
came again, his seed mixing with Snape\'s in a mess all over his and
Snape\'s chests.

Harry felt Snape breathing deeply against him and then roll to the
side, his stomach shiny with semen. Harry looked at the ceiling and
felt Snape\'s fingertips move against his stomach. He looked up and down
and propped himself up on his elbows to see Snape tracing patterns in
the semen on his chest. Snape\'s hand moved from Harry\'s chest to the
side of Harry\'s face and pulled Harry to him, kissing him again while
burying his hand deep into Harry\'s hair. They stayed together for a
while, kissing and moving slowly against one another. Their legs
entwining and releasing, rolling over each other and over the floor;
eventually they ended up in a pile on the carpet, their pants around
their ankles, shirts in disarray and covered in dried semen, which was
beginning to itch. Finally, Snape rolled away from Harry, reached down
and pulled up his pants. He sat up in an economy of movement that Harry
envied, stood all the way up and held a hand out to Harry. Harry
reached for it and let Snape pull him up, almost falling down again as
his legs caught up in his pants. Snape laughed and steadied Harry as he
caught his balance. Harry was faced with the awkward moment of bending
down and trying to get his pants on with out flashing his bare arse at
Snape. Fortunately, or by mistake this didn\'t happen. As Harry bent
over he was extremely conscious of Snape watching him. Snape caught him
around the middle and drew Harry to him so that Harry\'s back was
against Snape\'s chest. From there, Snape walked Harry over to his desk
and bent him over it.

Harry could only look out on the surface to the desk, covered with
parchments, quills and his own glasses as Snape ran his hands up and
down Harry\'s back. Snape moved between Harry\'s legs and ran a finger
from underneath the collar of Harry\'s shirt, down Harry\'s spine,
between his buttocks until it rested directly on top of Harry\'s anus.
Snape applied pressure to Harry\'s hole with the tip of his finger and
Harry tensed as his finger went in up to the knuckle. Snape bent over
Harry\'s back, with his finger still in Harry\'s arse, dipped down to
whisper into Harry\'s ear. Snape moved his finger out of Harry\'s anus
and ran it around to Harry\'s front gathering up some of the liquid that
still dotted Harry\'s stomach and chest. His hand moved back over
Harry\'s arse returned to his hole. Harry felt Snape\'s finger circle his
anus and then push back inside, the semen just lubricating the passage.
He gasped and turned his head to the side as Snape\'s finger pushed all
the way inside him and stayed there. Snape moved Harry\'s legs further
apart with his own legs and leaned over Harry\'s back, hingernger still
inside of Harry, pushing his covered crotch onto Harry\'s bare backside.
Snape stayed where he was, pushing against Harry, thrusting against
Harry. After feeling Snape pulse against him, Harry tried to push back
into Snape. He was stilled by Snape\'s hand against his back.

\"Be careful what you make wishes for Mr. Potter, and be ready for them
if you so desire.\" With that, Snape, pulled his finger out, ran both
hands up Harry\'s back and kissed him on the side of his face. Harry
fell off the desk,the the floor, sat there, his face in his hands,
covered with Snape\'s and his semen, pants at his ankles, and only knew
he wanted more and more.

***********