Image and soul

Title: Image and Soul
Author: Mahie/EvenStar
E-mail: persefone_rj@hotmail.com
Pairing: Harry/Ron,little Draco/Hermione
Rating: NC-17
Timeframe: by the end of 7th year
Spoilers: maybe something I heard that will be happening in the 7th
book,but nothing to do with the books who had already been released.
Archive: AFF.Net
anywhere else but please ask me first
Warnings: bad language/slash/one-shot (no sequels planned)
Notes: I wrote this after watching the first movie for the 5th time.
In the beginning of last year,I mean\'s \'s just a re-post,though it was
formerly on FF.Net and not here.
Summary: Ron is in love with Harry,but can he deal with his feelings?
Disclaimers: all the characters belong to J. K. Rowling and Warner Bros.


Ron was in love. But it was no easy kind of love. He was in love with
Harry Potter. His best friend. The Boy Who Lived. The most famous
wizard in the world. And to a boy like Ron,who was always underestimating
himself,feeling he was worse than his own brothers,this wasn\'t easy to
deal with. He felt a piece of nothing compared to Harry. Even being so
close to him,Ron always thought Harry was \"too much\" to him. He was
better,famous,more intelligent,richer,braver,and so on. Now they were
eighteen and Ron felt a little more self-confident,but still was afraid
to tell Harry the way he felt.
Voldemort had been killed by Harry a year before. Days were very calm these
days. Even Draco Malfoy,who used to be Harry\'s enemy,was his friend now.
He hadn\'t been a DeathEater like his father had,and even before Voldemort\'s
death,Draco had become Harry\'s friend and helped him to kill Voldemort.
Draco was not as great as Harry in magic but was one of the best wizards
alive too,so they could share their power.
After killing Voldemort,Harry seemed to have become even more famous. All
the places he went,he was recognized and spoiled. Harry was tired of it
all,and really didn\'t like all this thing,but no need to say Ron felt
even smaller by his side.
On a cold Winter day,Ron was walking his way to Gryffindor tower,when he
met Harry. Ron felt always the urge to tell him how much he loved him,but
still couldn\'t tell. He just hugged Harry,and listened to his problems,
and Harry did the same. Ron felt happy to be his best friend. While most
people saw his image,Ron knew his soul. His fears,his wishes,and he was
always there when Harry needed him. He wasn\'t like that girl _ Cho Chang _
who had once dated Harry justauseause of his fame. She would become
popular if she dated him,and so she did it. When Harry found it out by
listening her talking to friends,it was his greatest disappointment.
When Ron met Harry,he felt at the very same time that he was nervous. And
asked:
\"What\'s wrong,Harry?\"
\"You can\'t imagine,Ron. Fuck,how I hate to be famous like that! I\'m going
to fight a giant troll from Asia. The monster has been destroying a city
there,and it has to be killed.\"
\"But why you?\" Ron asked. \"Aren\'t there great wizards in Asia,for God\'s
sake?\"
\"Yes,but I am Harry Potter,the Boy Who Lived,The Boy Who Defeated
Voldemort,The Boy Who Blah-Blah-Blah...Fuck!! And this is not easy as
they think!! I think they should choose an older wizard.\"
\"But you know that your age was never a problem,Harry. You were the youngest
seeker of the century. You almost killed Voldemort when you were
one-year-old. You are the best,Harry,and you know that.\" Ron said,almost
dreamily. It was like Harry was an idol to him,even though they were so
close friends. He continued:
\"Harry,your power will make you a kind of savior,you know that. You\'ll
be always fighting something,or someone. You cannot help it. Now it\'s
already begun.\"
\"I think I\'m afraid of this kind of life.\"
\"You know you can defeat all these monsters and bad wizards out there.
You defeated Voldemort,Harry! Think: you\'ll never have a routine...you\'ll
always be travelling...meeting new wizards and making new friends...\"
\"And being careful to realize if they want to be friends with me or with
The Boy Who Defeated Voldemort.\"
\"Yes,that\'s the worst part. That was what I was going to say: the only
thing I imagine that you\'ll have to be careful with is not to trust
anyone and not let your fame and power be stronger than your soul.\" Ron
smiled at him. \"But it will be difficult to happen,\'cause I know you. I
know you will never be arrogant because of your fame or power.\"
Harry smiled and hugged Ron. He liked the idea of travelling and having
a non-routine life. And by the end of this term,his last year at Hogwarts,
he knew it would be even more usual to have these kind of affairs. But
what he didn\'t like was being famous.
Harry would be travelling to China soon to fight the troll. Ron,Hermione
and Draco,who were his best friends,weren\'t afraid,because they believed
the troll wouldn\'t be a problem. Ron was more worried with his own
cowardice to tell Harry the way he felt.
And what he felt was very strong. Only Hermione and Draco knew_but,of
course,he had asked them not to tell Harry. The day before Harry\'s trip,
he talked to his three best friends in private.
\"Wish me luck.\" Harry said at first,and Hermione was the first one to
hug him and wish him luck. Draco noticed he was nervous,and said:
\"I don\'t know why you are nervous,Harry,I really don\'t know. It\'s just
a stupid troll.\"
\"But it\'s a *giant* troll Draco.\"
\"I agree with Draco.\" Ron said. \"You are better than any troll,Harry.\"
Harry said \"OK\" just for them to shut their mouthes. He didn\'t need his
friends telling he was the best. He was already sick of hearing this
from strangers. At least with his friends Harry wanted to feel like a
normal person.
\"OK,let\'s just stop talking about it.\" Harry said. \"I wanted to spend
this night with you. Because I never know if I\'ll be back.\"
\"Stop being dramatic,we all know you will!!\" Hermione said laughing. \"So,
are we going to Hogsmeade?\"
\"Are we allowed?\" asked Draco.
\"Yes.\" Harry looked at him. \"Dumbledore said that I could take you
wherever I wanted to. But only this night.\"
\"OK,let\'s go then.\" Ron said excitedly.
---
They arrived at Hogsmeade very fastly. Butterbeers seemed to be even more
tasty that night. They kept talking and drinking for a long time. y
sy
stopped drinking earlier than his friends because he would have to travel
the next day. But the other three were becoming drunk.
\"I won\'t carry the three of you!\" Harry laughed while watching them drink
more and more butterbeers.
Ron,Hermione and Draco laughed,and drank more butterbeers. After this,
they went out and wandered by the city. Harry watched as Draco pulled
Hermione closer and kissed her. She was very surprised but liked it.
When Draco and Hermione were walking a little far from them,Harry asked
Ron:
\"Are they dating?\"
\"I don\'t know.\" Ron laughed. \"But I can bet they want to do it.\"
\"Did you know Draco was in love with her?\"
\"No.\" Ron watched Harry. \"Why? Are you jealous?\" Ron hoped not.
\"No!!\" Harry laughed. \"Just curious.\"
\"He wouldn\'t have told it only to me,but to the both of us.\"
\"Yes,I guess so. Ron,I dunno,but sometimes I don\'t trust Draco still.
Why hasn\'t he told us that?\"
\"He\'s our friend now Harry. Do you trust me?\"
\"Of course I do. I trust you with my life.\" Harry said sincerely,and Ron
smiled.
\"So believe in me,Draco is just a little...shy to confess his feelings.\"
\"I know,but I think a friend should tell everything.\"
\"Oh,not always...there are people who don\'t tell everything but feel so
much...\" Ron was talking about himself,but Harry didn\'t notice.
\"Yes,maybe. Maybe it\'s just that it\'s still odd to me that we became
friends with Draco.\"
\"You are jealous,that\'s all!!\" Ron laughed at him. Draco and Hermione
were far away now and Harry didn\'t know where they had gone.
\"I\'m not!! I love another person.\" Harry said.
Ron\'s heart froze. Who was that person?
\"Who?\"
\"Not telling.\" Harry laughed,and said: \"I think we should go back to
school.\"
\"Where are Draco and Hermione?\" Ron asked.
\"Uh...I think they wouldn\'t be glad if we found them now.\"
Harry and Ron went back to Hogwarts. Somewhere,Draco and Hermione were
making love and had started dating.
---
As soon as they entered Gryffindor common room,Harry went to bed. He was
very tired and needed to rest before thinking about the giant troll. He
said goodnight to Ron and fell asleep.
Later in the night,Harry was awaken by a noise. He opened his eyes and
watched who was talking in his sleep. It was Ron.
\"Harry...\" he said. But Harry didn\'t notice he was saying \"Harry\". It
sounded like \"Mary\" or something.
Harry went near Ron\'s bed,but only watched him.
\"Harry...\" he repeated,still asleep.
Harry sat on his bed,took one of Ron\'s hand in his and said:
\"Shhh...go to sleep,Ron.\"
\"Harry...\"
\"Shhh...\". Ron squeezed Harry\'s hand and said:
\"More...\"
Harry didn\'t understand what he meant by \"more\". His hand was sweaty,and
Ron had been moaning a little. Harry told him to sleep once more and went
back to his bed. Before sleeping again,he realized that Ron was maybe
saying \"Harry\" and not \"Mary\". He didn\'t know any Mary,and Harry knew
all Ron\'s friends.
Harry would be travelling very early in the morning. When he woke up,Ron
was still asleep,but Harry wanted to say goodbye to him.
\"Ron...\" he called,sitting on his bed,and caressing his hair.
\"What?\" he woke up in a sudden. \"Oh,Harry,it\'s you...what is it? Are you
going to leave now?\"
\"Yeah...I\'m leaving...just wanted to say goodbye...\"
\"Goodbye then...\" Ron hugged him tight. \"Good luck. And please come
back.\" he smiled.
\"I will,\" Harry smiled at him. \"Say goodbye to Draco and Hermione to me.\"
\"OK.\" Ron said,and before sleeping again he said: \"Gosh,I had such a
dream this night...\"
\"Really? What about?\" Harry asked. He wanted to know what Ron had dreamed
finally.
\"It was an...erotic dream...\" Ron said with no idea that Harry had heard
him call his name,even though Harry was not sure that he had called Harry
or Mary. \"Lots of sex,and all I can remember is that I begged for more...\"
Harry\'s face became pale. Then he blushed furiously. Was Ron dreaming
of having sex with him??? It couldn\'t be. Maybe he knew a Mary somewhere.
But Harry couldn\'t help himself to blush. And Ron noticed there was
something wrong. He became pale as well.
\"I heard you...\" Harry said.
\"What???\" Ron asked. \"Wh-what d-did you hear?\"
\"I heard you moaning and asking for more...\"
\"Really?\" Ron blushed.
\"Yeah...and I heard a name...\" he looked into Ron\'s eyes. \"A name I
couldn\'t understand very well...but it sounded like Mary...\"
Ron blushed even more. It wasn\'t Mary.
\"Do you know any Mary,Ron?\"
\"N-no...\"
\"Terry?\" Harry asked.
\"N-no...\"
\"Then what name did you say?\"
\"I-I don\'t know...\" Ron tried to sound convincing,but he wasn\'t. His
blush and his trembling made Harry think that maybe Ron was dreaming
about him. But it wasn\'t time to think about this.
\"I...I need to go.\" he said.
\"Bye...\" Ron said,still nervous.
\"Goodbye Ron.\"
Ron stood there,cursing himself for being so talkative at night.
What if Harry didn\'t want to talk to him again? What if he thought it
was him?
Ron tried to sleep again but it was impossible.
--hilehile Harry was away,Ron kept sending him owls,but his letters weren\'t
answered. Ron thought Harry didn\'t want to talk to him again. And Draco
and Hermione were now dating; so Ron stayed alone most of the time. Both
his friends wanted him to be near them,but Ron didn\'t feel comfortable
holding a candle.
Ron was becoming depressed. The thought of never talking to Harry again
was a horrible one. He wanted desperately that he came back soon for him
to explain; and maybe to deny some things. If Harry thought Ron was in
love with him,Ron would deny it till his death,that\'s what he thought.
Harry would never love him back. He was famous,rich,handsome,and Ron was
just a poor boy,a boy in the shadows of The Boy Who Defeated Voldemort.
Harry would want to date a beautiful girl,as popular as him.
The news had come fastly. Harry had defeated the giant troll. He would
be back soon. And all the school was preparing to celebrate it in a party
the night Harry came back.
When he came back,all the students spoiled him. There were even more
girls around Harry. All of them wanted to kiss him,to dance with him.
And Ron was vefraifraid to talk to him again. And all the spoiling made
him feel even smaller. Harry would never notice him between all those
people.
He felt like nothing.
Harry hadn\'t seen his friends yet,\'cause people wanted photographs,and
autographs,and so on. Harry was very irritated,but accepted these things
and all the girls spoiling around him. But what he wanted most was to
meet Ron,Hermione and Draco again.
When Harry could enter the Gryffindor common room,Hermione smiled brightly
and hugged him.
\"Oh,God,Herm,I\'m so happy to be back...\"
\"Harry,you did it!!!\" she said. \"See,I told you not to be dramatic.\" she
laughed.
Draco showed up next. Now all the Gryffindors were used to see him in
the common room because of his and Hermione affair.
\"Did you know we were dating?\" Draco asked Harry.
\"No,but I imagined so.\" Harry laughed and hugged Draco tightly. \"I\'m
very happy for you.\"
Harry noticed Ron wasn\'t there and asked:
\"Where\'s Ron?\"
Hermione fell silent. Draco looked away. Harry asked:
\"What is it?\"
\"Well,Harry...\" Hermione said. \"Ron won\'t be in the party.\"
\"Why not?\" Harry asked again,worried.
\"He\'s...very sad,that\'s all.\" Draco said.
\"But why?\"
Hermione let her arm go from Draco\'s and approached Harry.
\"I think you should talk to him,Harry. He\'s depressed since the day you
left.\"
\"Where is he?\"
Before Hermione could answer,lots of Gryffindors entered the room and
wanted to take the three of them to the party which had already begun.
They went,but Harry didn\'t want to stay. He hated those celebrating things.
Especially without Ron.
After some more autographs,Harry managed to find Hermione again and asked:
\"Where is Ron,Herm?\"
\"He\'s in the dorm,Harry. He must be asleep. He sleeps most of the day.
The teachers are very worried about him. He\'s not going to all the classes,
and he\'s not studying...his parents have been here and all...and he\'s
taking some Muggle medicine as well.\"
\"For what?\"
\"Depression.\" Hermione said sadly.
Harry felt very worried. He wanted to see Ron immediately. The hell with
the fucking party.
\"Let\'s go with him,Hermione.\" Draco said.
The three of them went back to Gryffindor common room and then to the
dorm. Ron was asleep. He had seen Harry coming but didn\'t want to talk
to him. He felt ashamed and afraid because of what had happened that
night before the trip.
\"Ron...\" Harry sat on his bed.
\"Harry!\" Ron woke up in a sudden. Harry noticed he was very skinny. He
hugged Ron tightly,and looked to Draco and Hermione.
\"Please,let me talk to him privately.\"
\"OK.\" Hermione said.
\"Call us if you need.\" Draco said and left with his girlfriend.
After they left,Ron sat on his bed. Harry was watching his every move.
\"What has happened to you,Ron?\" Harry had little tears in his eyes. \"Why
are you depressed?\"
\"I dunno.\" Ron lied and tried to change the subject. \"You did very well,
Harry. You were great as always.\"
\"I don\'t care and you know that,Ron.\" he said. \"I\'m worried about you,
now let\'s talk about you.\"
Ron ignored what he had said and asked:
\"Why aren\'t you in the party? It\'s for you!\"
\"Guess why,Ron.\" Harry was becoming angry.
\"Stop this thing!\" Ron yelled at him and Harry got really surprised that
he could yell as weak as he seemed to be. \"You are famous,you are the
best wizard and you have a party waiting for you! You don\'t have to stay
here with me.\"
\"I don\'t fucking care about parties,or articles about me,and you know
that,Ron!\" Harry said,still angry. \"And I\'m here because I want to. I\'m
worried about you and I don\'t care if they are partying or something
because I defeated a fucking troll.\"
\"Why are you here?\" Ron asked. He felt very badly that Harry wasn\'t
having fun because of him. Ron thought he didn\'t deserve Harry\'s worries.
\"Because I care about you.\" Harry said. \"And you are ill. I won\'t be in
the mood to go to the party if you are like this.\"
Ron fell silent and Harry asked again:
\"Now can you tell me what\'s wrong with you?\"
\"Did you get my letters?\" Ron tried to change the subject again.
\"Oh...I was going to tell thisthis...I couldn\'t read them,Ron. Dumbledore
asked me to be concentrated. He got all my letters. And there were lots
of them. Lots of girls spoiling,and everything...I asked him if I could
only answer to you,but he didn\'t let me do it.\"
Ron smiled a bit. So Harry had his reasons not to answer him. Harry smiled
as well and took Ron\'s hands in his.
\"Sorry.\" Harry said sincerely. \"I really couldn\'t answer.\"
\"It\'s OK.\" Ron answered.
\"Did you miss me?\"
\"All the time.\" Ron said without second thoughts and then felt himself
blushing furiously. But Harry didn\'t seem to notice.
They talked for a long time. Harry told him about the troll,and what
China was like,and similar things. Ron didn\'t say a word about his
depression,and the more Harry asked,the less Ron said. But he felt better
to talk to Harry and said:
\"Let\'s go to the party then!\"
\"No...I don\'t want to go anymore...\"
Ron looked at him and said:
\"But why?\"
\"Seems nicer to be here with you. Do I need a lot of people seeing my
image if I have someone who knows my soul?\"
Ron looked at him in the eye and said nothing. Harry came closer to him
and caressed his face. Ron was tense,and when Harry took his hand again,
he shivered a little.
Harry looked away,and asked Ron something that couldn\'t get off his mind:
\"Who was the one you were dreaming of that night before I went to
China,Ron?\"
Ron blushed. He tried to lie:
\"Oh...a g-girl I m-met once...Terry...\"
\"Terry?\" Harry didn\'t believe him. \"When on Earth did you know a girl
named Terry? You told me you didn\'t know any Terry.\"
\"No!! I-I m-met a Terry once... It w-was in...\"
Ron couldn\'t finish. Harry said:
\"Don\'t lie to me,Ron...\"
Ron started to cry because he knew that Harry had noticed he had dreamed
about him. He tried to hide his face,but Harry didn\'t let him do it.
\"Ron,look at me.\"
\"No...pl-please leave me alone...\"
\"Ron...\" Harry hugged him tight,and started to kiss his hair.
\"Stop it,Harry...go to your party...\"
\"Why are you so afraid?\"
Ron stood up and went to the common room. Harry followed him. Ron had
sat on a chair and Harry asked,kneeling rontront of him.
\"Don\'t run away from me,Ron...\"
\"I\'m not!\" he said irritated. \"I just want to be alone!!\" he yelled again.
Harry didn\'t care about the yell,and took one of Ron\'s hand in his.
\"I\'ll go away later if you want. But I need to know something,and I want
it now. You dreamed of me,didn\'t you?\",Harry asked,looking at him in the
eye.
\"No!\" Ron tried to deny it,but Harry took his face in his hands and pulled
him close:
\"I know when you are lying,Ron.\"
Ron stood there looking at Harry in the eye,and their lips were almost
touching. So,Harry kissed him finally.
Their kiss was so sweet that Ron thought he would melt. He felt happy
like never before. Harry took him in his arms and went back to the dorm,
never once breaking the kiss. They lay down on Ron\'s bed.
\"I love you,Ron.\" Harry said when he broke the kiss. \"I love you so very
much...I don\'t want you to be afraid of me...never...\"
\"I\'ve always felt so small beside you,Harry...\" Ron confessed. \" I think
you\'re better than me in everything.\"
\"How can you feel so small if you love me,Ron? How can you feel bad when
you love someone? I\'ll be just your boyfriend here. Forget about The Boy
Who Lived and so on...OK? It\'s just you and me now and we\'re the same
because we love one another.\"
Ron bursted into tears while Harry started to take off his clothes. But
before taking them all,he asked:
\"Want to do it?\"
\"Yes.\" Ron answered. \"I want you to make love to me.\"
Harry smiled and kissed him hard. Ron started to take Harry\'s clothes as
well. And when they saw each other naked,they kissed again even more
passionately.
Harry felt very safe in Ron\'s arms. It was like being really loved;not
only admired or respected by his power. He knew Ron would be going to be
the best boyfriend he could ever have.
Harry licked all the way through Ron\'s body and reached his hard cock.
Ron moaned. It was really incredible that Harry was there with him when
he could be with all those people who admired him.
\"I don\'t need to make an image; I need to be loved.\" Harry said as if
he had heard Ron\'s thoughts,and engulfed his cock,sucking him hard until
Ron started to shake uncontrollably from pleasure.
\"Oh...Harry...please...don\'t stop...oh...\"
After he came,Harry asked lovingly:
\"Are you OK?\"
\"Never better.\"
Harry kissed him again,lying on the top of Ron.
\"I love you,Harry...I still can\'t believe you love me too...\"
\"You\'re not worse than anyone...you deserve to be loved just as everybody
else,Ron...and if you don\'t stop underestimating yourself,I\'ll be really
mad at you.\"
It was Ron\'s time to kiss Harry hard. After this kiss,Harry was so
excited that Ron spread his legs and let Harry take him.
When Harry entered him,Ron felt something he had never felt before. It
hurted,but was good as well. He moaned even more,and Harry\'s thrusts were
becoming faster and deeper. Ron cried in pain,and Harry stopped everything:
\"Sorry...I\'m so sorry, my love...\" he held Ron tightly,worried about him.
He was very excited and couldn\'t help thrusting fastly and deeply and
hardly.
\"It\'s OK,Harry...it\'s OK...\" Ron caressed his hair while Harry was lying
on the top of him.
\"Did I hurt you,love?\" Harry asked and kissed Ron\'s mouth softly.
\"A little,but don\'t worry...take me again...\"
\"No...let\'s do something different...will you suck me?\"
\"Of course.\" Ron grinned and put Harry\'s cock on the mouth.
It felt so good that Harry almost screamed when he came. He said Ron\'s
name out loud. Said that he loved him. And Ron hugged him tight after
all. Harry did the same as they lay there on Ron\'s bed,embracing one
another tightly.
\"I love you so...\" Ron said.
They stayed there talking,caressing,kissing,and making love for a while.
Then they decided to go to the party. People would be asking where Harry
was.
Harry and Ron went to the Great Hall and when they got there Harry
immediately was asked where he had been,that he had to take photos and
to answer an article\'s questions. This time Harry did it all with a smile
on his face.
Ron joined Draco and Hermione. She said:
\"Who if not Harry would make you get off from your bed?\"
\"No one,Hermione. No one...\",Ron said grinning while his eyes were on
Harry on the other side of the Hall.

The End