Stress Relief

Mrs Sheen

AN/ Mr Sheen is a furniture polish, hence the chapter title.

Ahh – another chapter! Well, I was kinda tired when I wrote this, and being my own beta, well…both of us were just a tad dozy. Hope you enjoy anyway… Sorry it’s been a while since I’ve updated.


Snape swept into the dungeon classroom with his usual air of contempt for the students. The class immediately hushed. That was one relief – fifth years seemed to have for the most part realised that silence was one way to avoid his wrath.
“Today you shall be preparing a draught of silence,” Snape crossed his arms over his chest, glowering down at the students before him. “This, though seemingly stupendously simple, will undoubtedly prove to be a challenge for many of you.” His eyes flicked around the room, pausing first on Neville Longbottom and then Harry. “I suggest you take care in reading the ingredients, don’t you agree, Mr Potter?”
Harry winced, remembering the disaster of his first potion this year, just three days ago, and the ominious zero he had received for the class.
“Yes, Sir,” Harry murmured.
“Very well. The directions are on the board, you will retrieve your own ingredients…MISS GRANGER!”
Hermione’s head jerked up in utter surprise. She was not usually subjected to Snape’s disapproval so early in the hour.
“Yes, Professor?” she asked, a little quizzical as to what she had done wrong.
“Who is that sitting beside you?”
Hermione glanced to her side and then back at Snape. She gave him a confused look and then said, rather slowly, “this is Norah Topps…she’s a uh…”
“Well, spit it out girl! I haven’t got all day!” Snape was now standing before the desk where the girls were seated.
“She’s an exchange student from…uh…”
“Perhaps you can tell me who you are and what you are doing in my potions class? Miss Granger seems to have lost her tiny wee mind!” Snape hissed at the girl.
“I’m Norah Topps,” she gave him a grin. “I’m here on an exchange – just for tonight.”
“Very well,” Snape muttered, obviously rather annoyed to have this extra student in his class. “I should hope that perhaps you could teach Miss Granger some manners!”
“Dunno about that…Sir,” the girl giggled.
“Well, let me tell you, Miss Topps, that you’d do best to keep your head down in my class – I will not tolerate any foolish nonsense!”
Snape glided back to the front of the class to take the seat at his desk.
Norah giggled again. Snape shot her a sharp look, and caught her whispering something to Hermione.
“Something you wish to share with the class?” he hissed at her.
“Something you’d probably prefer I didn’t,” she smirked at him, and Hermione snorted, trying so hard to stop from laughing.
“Well then, keep it to yourself – you have an entire hour for lunch to share silly girly gossip with Miss Granger!”
“Oh, I have much more important things planned for my lunch hour.” Snape glared at the girl.
“I don’t care to know what you shall be doing with your break, Miss Topps. I am only interested in the fact that you shall be out of my classroom!”
Half the class room snickered – the half adorned in green and silver.
The class continued it’s work in silence for several minutes, and Snape returned the papers on his desk. However, as hard as he tried to focus on grading the first year essays he had demanded be handed in this morning – two day early – he couldn’t concentrate. His mind kept wandering back to the night he’d spent in the garden outside his family’s home with Tonks. Ah, such a memory, he recalled. The way she had looked at him, like nothing else in the world had mattered. The feel of her soft skin against his…
Snape’s daydream ended abruptly as a loud crash echoed through the class. His eyes flew open and scanned the room for the source of the noise. It didn’t take long. That blasted girl and Miss Know-it-all were staring down at the floor. There lay an up turned cauldron, green goo oozing from beneath it.
“Clean that blasted mess up this instance!” he boomed at them, his face glowering.
“Oops,” said the girl, and gave Hermione a genuinely apologetic look. She pulled her wand from her pocket and cast a rather advanced cleansing spell. Snape wondered just for a moment where she had managed to learn such advanced magic, but quickly shoved the thought aside as being somewhat trivial. Who cared, so long as there were no holes in the floor?
Ah, yes, now, Tonks, where were we? Snape began to drift off again, recalling those glorious moments. He still hadn’t retrieved his cloak – having to wear one he had dug from his closet instead. Though he had transfigured it from purple to black, he still was not satisfied with its appearance – still, it was a small price to pay for the sight of her sleeping in his arms. What he wouldn’t do to have her there again…
Snape flicked his eyes open again, checking to make sure the students were working. Convinced that they were all hard at work, he pulled out a piece of parchment and his quill, intending to write Tonks a letter. Granted, he knew he could never send it to her for fear of it being intercepted, but perhaps he could arrange some other way to get it to her.

Dearest Tonks

I trust this letter finds you well.

My students this year are the usual bunch of imbeciles…

Snape looked at the page and screwed it into a ball, shoving it across his desk in disgust. Much too formal – too uncaring. He never had been one to express his emotions – and despite his feelings for Tonks, and his declaration to her, which he was now finding hard to believe he’d actually said. He almost smiled – the things a woman could do to a man.

A wad of parchment later, and all Snape had achieved was a growing mountain of discarded paper balls on his desk. However, on the bright side, the class seemed to have mostly finished making their potions and were hence that much closer to departing his presence.
“Well, what are you waiting for? Bring me a sample of your potions!” Snape demanded, his mood changing for the fouler in frustration.
The fifth years scampered up to his desk like timid little mice. With two exceptions – one being Draco Malfoy, who being made a Slytherin Prefect had seemingly impossibly inflated his ego even further, and the other being Norah Topps. She casually strode up to his desk, tripping over the tiniest raise in the stone floor on her way. She placed the flagon beside the others, but did not return to her desk.
“You seem to be in a particularly foul mood,” she observed, giving him a critical look. “Perhaps been a little long since you were last laid?”
Snape was utterly speechless. He glared quickly around the room, but most of the students were already heading for the door and didn’t seem to have heard what she said – all except for Potter, Weasley and Granger.
“Excuse me?”
“I said, been awhile since you got laid?”
“I don’t believe that is any of your…”
”Okay, let’s try this one – you know, Sir,” she leant against his desk, her eyes looking at the ceiling in thought, as if trying to remember something, “I’ve heard that your hair is so greasy that last time you went to get it cut, 3 hairdressers drowned.”
Snape’s face distorted in anger, and he stood from his desk, pointing a sharp finger at the door. “GET OUT!” Hermione, Ron and Harry who stood at the classroom door erupted into hysterical laughter, then darted out the room, slamming the door behind them.
The girl rolled her eyes, “Jeez, Sev, what’s a girl gotta do to get detention around here? Anyone would think you’re in lurrrrrrrrve!”
Snape paused, about to yell obscenities at the obnoxious tramp who dared insult him, when something clicked. “Tonks?”
“Yeah,” she grinned. “Can I have detention now? I mean, I can continue with the insults if you’d like, but I have things I’d much rather be doing.” The girl winked at him.
“Oh, for heavens sake,” Snape leant back in his chair, with a somewhat irritated look. “Why couldn’t you have just come to my chambers later?”
“Where’s the fun it that, Sir? I’d much rather have detention,” she teased. “Then you can order me back to your room if you like, but I’ve kinda been wondering what your desk would feel like under my bare bum.”
An amused look settled itself over Snape’s face. “Is that so?”
“Yeah. I was just hoping I wouldn’t get any splinters.” Tonks smirked back at him. “Not that I’d complain of course – small discomfort to endure. And then of course there’s the time you’d have to spend pulling them out for me. Besides, your desk looks like it could use a polish.”
“Well, you most certainly do deserve a detention – however, you will not get it looking like that!” he waved his hand over her current form. “I am not interested in bratty little fifth years, Miss Tonks!”
Tonks wrinkled her nose, squeezed her eyes tightly shut and moments later stood before him as herself, – albeit the bubblegum pink hair back and still dressed in a Hogwarts school uniform.
“What is with that?” Snape sneered at the robes.
“Well, this is detention, sir,” she replied. “Don’t tell me you’ve never had little fantasies about any of your students?”
”MOST CERTAINLY NOT!”
”Oh, sure. Well, tell yourself that if you wish, but I can assure you that your students have had fantasies about you.”
Snape eyed her wearily for a moment. “Hardly.”
“Oh, very hardly,” Tonks grinned at him. “Might even have to admit to having had a couple myself back when I used to be here. You do have a rather alluring voice, Professor, even when it is being used to yell at some poor clumsy girl for being an imbecile.”
“I never called you an imbecile – a three footed twit, but never an imbecile.”
Tonks looked him square in the eyes, a deadly serious look on her face. Snape was just beginning to think that perhaps she had taken his insult to heart when she burst out laughing.
“Well,” he spoke quietly, as if someone were listening, “perhaps my mind did wander somewhat when you were in seventh year.”
“Ha! I knew it! Well then, Professor, I believe I have detention?”
“Indeed.”
Snape seemed to be unsure of what exactly to do with her, so Tonks took the opportunity to seat her self on the desk before him. She leaned forward and placed a hungry kiss upon his waiting lips. Snape found his limbs again, reaching forward to unclasp her robes, allowing them to fall on the desk under her. So, he thought, she used to fantasize about me? He found this incredibly arousing, the crotch of his pants seemingly shrinking in the process. Her hands were in his hair, pulling him deeper into the kiss. She slid from the desk and into his lap, slipping her legs between his thighs and the arms of his chair. Snape growled as she lowered herself against him, her weight falling deliciously against his raging erection. Three days of nothing but wondering how and when he would next get this opportunity had left him overly sensitised. Snape began to wonder what on earth she must think of him – he had hardly lasted long enough last time to tip her over the edge and he doubted he could do much more this time. She turned him back into a raging hormonal teenager again – with a complete lack of self-control. Tonks, however, was feeling rather needy herself – she’d also spent the past few days fantasizing about this – and now it was here she could hardly contain herself. She ground her hips into his, eliciting a gasp from the wizard beneath her. Amused, she repeated the move, pleased with the friction against her clit. Snape caught her hips in his hands, holding her still.
“Dangerous move, Tonks,” he murmured, his eyes falling shut. “I suggest if you are serious about feeling my desk under that pleasant bottom of yours that you hold still for the meantime?”
“Something wrong with the present time?” Tonks enquired, in a gaspy voice. When Snape drew in a sharp breath in reply, Tonks slid back off his lap and onto the desk once again. Snape wasted no time in unbuttoning his pants, and pushing Tonks’skirt up to her hips. He didn’t even take the moment to remove her pink panties (the same colour as her hair, he noted) instead, just shoving them to one side. He plunged himself into her in one swift move. He almost regretted the move, desperately trying to think of anything other than the tight wet heat now surrounding him. The next class… Sirius… Professor Umbridge… Unfortunately Tonks’ hearty moan broke his concentration.
“Merlin, that feels good,” she sighed, clenching her muscles around him.
“STOP!” Snape roared, causing Tonks to jump in surprise.
“Sorry,” she giggled.
“Gods, girl,” Snape moaned, leaning his palms on the desk’s surface, taking a deep breath.
Tonks shivered at his words. It still didn’t cease to amaze her that she could have this affect on the man. She felt a new rush of need flood through her, and her breath caught in her throat. Tonks reached down and found her clit with her slender finger, slowly circling it, and occasionally brushing over it. Snape watched on in awe. He watched as her breathing changed to short, sharp, ragged gasps, her face flushing, and the tiny tugs on his erection grew stronger, pulling him in further.
“Sev, now!” Tonks moaned, her head slipping back off the edge of the desk, unable to hold it up any longer. Snape drew almost out of her and plunged quickly back in. Tonks let out a cry as she came, clutching at the edge of the desk. Snape took up an unforgiving rhythm, drawing out Tonks orgasm to the point where she thought she would black out. The intensity of the waves flooding through her body seemed to build to the brink of being painful, as were the muscles gripping tightly on Snape’s erection. He couldn’t hold out any longer. With one last plunge he joined her in oblivion.

Tonks came back to earth first to find Snape collapsed op oop of her. Cor, she thought, the bloody desk with collapse under this. She wriggled a little to try and get comfortable, knowing already that there would be bruises on her backside in the morning. Snape came to his senses, and struggled off her with an apology.
“I wouldn’t rather be squished by anyone else,” Tonks replied, straighting out her clothes as Snape tucked himself back away.
“Well, I suppose I’m supposed to be touched by that?” he enquired, raising an eyebrow at her.
“Don’t really care what you think about that, just kiss me you twit.”
Although it was tough not to retort, Snape decided complying with her demand was a much more pleasureable option. He leaned down and caught her lips with his, running his fingers through her spikey hair. Tonks sighed against his mouth, sucking his bottom lip between her own.
The classroom door creaked open, and a loud clearing of a throat echoed through the room. Snape’s eyes darted to the door, and there stood Albus Dumbledore.
“Severus! What on Merlin do you think you are doing?!”
Tonks had rarely heard Dumbledore sounding so ser, an, and those few occasions had been over Voldemorts actions.
Tonks couldn’t help it. A giggle escaped.
“Albus, sorry,” Tonks turned to look at the old wizard, a laugh still on her face. “I guess we should’ve locked the door.”
“Nymphadora?” Dumbledore’s face softened somewhat and then turned serious again. “Well, I suppose what the two of you do in your spare time is your business – may I suggest you keep it that way? Severus, I would’ve thought you would have the pertinence to ward the room?”
Snape looked guiltily at the floor, then back at the Headmaster. “Sir, I am sorry, I … she…”
“My doing, Albus. I kinda jumped him.”
“Well…Well…” Dumbledore for once seemed to be short for words. “As you were. I shall ward the doors, I think. I suppose I should’ve recognised that hair…” The door clicked shut behind him, and Tonks turned back to Snape and burst out laughing.
“How could you tell Dumbledore that you ‘jumped me’?” Snape demanded angrily.
“Oh, Sev, chill. He might be wise and almighty, but his is a wizard. I’m sure he’s had his fair share of witches over the years…”
“I’d prefer not to think about that, thank you!” Snape stood and straightened his clothes. “Come on – my next class will be here any moment, and it wouldn’t be fitting for them to find me with sex dripping from my desk.”
“Always the charmer,” Tonks muttered, but she was smiling. “I shall see you this evening then?”
“Of course.”


Estella – yay! I’ve converted another one! Hm, perhaps I’ll write a prequel to this one day…

Tiffany – yes, a little stress relief? TEE HEE! One of my mates has just started OotP and she says she wouldn’t keep reading it if I wasn’t making her – she is a devout HP fan, but she thinks it is quite depressing, and I have to agree.

Gx-Silver – cheers!

Seraphina – Hm, Snape as sex on a stick – might have to market that! Glad you enjoyed it! ;)

Alana – Yay! I achieved my goal! Thought a little fluffy fairytale was in order…

M A Raie – Thank you! Wow! People are recommending this to their friends? I am flattered!

Amethyst – thanks so much! I’ll check out your fic as soon as I get a chance!