Words Could Never Say It

Chapter Nine - The Apology

Mario Devenish had been sent to the Ministry of Magic for trial of attempted rape and was expelled from Hogwarts the Monday after the Halloween ball. Everyone was talking about it, and most of the students had found his fate most fitting, Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter among them - three months in Azkaban. A new Keeper had been brought to the Hufflepuff team, a tall and lean fifth year named Dash Candle, and one the Beaters, Trixi Samson, had been named Quidditch Captain. She was harder on the players than Devenish had been, and it was doing them wonders, pushing them farther than they had ever allowed themselves to go.

Draco had been in a rather dazed state since the Halloween ball. Emily Rose Matthews... a Mudblood? He winced inward at the word even as he thought it. She wasn't EXACTLY a Muggle-born... Her father had been a Squib, from a very powerful and old Wizarding family. It would make sense the magic could pass through the blood and skip a generation... but it was still so unreal. He didn't know what he was more shocked at "“ the fact that Emily was a Muggle-born, or the fact that Draco found himself caring less and less about her heritage the more he was apart from her.

For her own, Emily was avoiding Draco like the plague, and he knew why. He openly voiced his hatred for Muggle-born wizards and witches on several occasions, and he used the term Mudblood very freely. No wonder she had stood up for Granger that day in the hall... For the first time in his life, he began to feel guilt about how he had treated Granger. For now, he was simply ignoring her to keep him from being tempted to call her that or otherwise mock her. He found this harder done than said... Over the past five years, teasing Granger about her heritage and really anything else he could think of had become something of a pastime or hobby to him, and that made him feel even worse.

November came and went, the first hard snow falling on the first of December. By the time the middle of December arrived, most students had plans to travel home for the Christmas holiday, Draco among them. He half dreaded this time of year... the Malfoy clan was as big a family as any pureblood wizard family in the world, and they were the most stuck-up and bigoted, but they were also very judgmental of him and how he was reacting to the dirty blood that infested the school of Hogwarts. This year, however, he had too much on his mind about a certain Muggle-born to worry about his family.

Draco had already packed his trunk before he went down to breakfast the day after the final day of term. Most of the students had already left for the Hogwarts Express from Hogsmeade back to London, but his parents always came to pick him up personally and apparate him home. The tables were somewhat barren, but there was still plenty of food on array there - toast and English muffins, pastries, dried cereals, milk and pumpkin juice. Simple, but sufficient. Draco sat down alone, something he hadn't done since arriving at Hogwarts "“ Crabbe and Pansy had gone to Hogsmeade to catch the Hogwarts Express earlier that morning, and Goyle had gone to spend Christmas with Millicent's family (the two had become something of a couple after the Halloween ball).

The Great Hall was decorated with its classic Christmas trees, done up in gold and the colors of the schoolhouses in the four corners of the hall. Gold bells and ornaments garnished with holly and mistletoe hung from the rafters above, appearing to hang in midair with the magical ceiling that showed the gray sky, snow drifting gently downward in the windless air and disappeared about ten feet above the ground. Red, green and gold ribbons tied into beautiful bows adorned the torch and candle fixtures around the Great Hall, strung together with more garnish with glass baubles that encased tiny flickering lights hanging from them.

A glitter of silver caught Draco's eye, and he looked up from his meal and his thoughts. The text Emily Matthews had scrolled vanished before he could read it as she waved goodbye to three Hufflepuff girls walking away from the Hufflepuff table where she was seated alone. Granger had just approached her and was signing to her with a smile, and Emily stood, gently hugging her before the bushy-haired girl left the table and made her way toward the exit. Draco watched her, looking back at Emily, and gritted his teeth. With a scowl, he stood up, leaving his food, and hurried after Hermione.

"Granger!” he shouted as he reached the large oak front doors, seeing Hermione just reach the bottom. She paused and turned to him, a dark expression coming to her face as he spoke.

"What do you want, Malfoy,” she said dangerously, her hand in her pocket. The last time they had ‘spoken,' he had tried to give her a black eye at the beginning of October. But he had been avoiding her and not even sniggering at jokes others had made about her. The only thing that kept her from hexing him that moment for even presenting himself was her curiosity as to why.

Draco moved down the stairs to her, stopping a few stairs up and looking at her. He gritted his teeth, and took a deep breath. "Look... This isn't easy, so bare with me,” he rumbled in his throat, and Hermione cocked a brow. When Draco spoke, it sounded like he was swallowing broken glass. "I'm... sorry for how I have behaved toward you. Nothing I can say can make up for it, and I won't insult you by asking if I can when I already know the answer. I'm sorry I ever called you a Mudblood.” He took a step back up the stairs as Hermione gapped at him, flabbergast and at a lack for words. "... Happy Christmas, then,” he said quickly, and turned, hurrying up the stairs and back into the Entrance Hall. He felt... odd. And slightly disturbed. But he knew it would get back to Emily. That's what really mattered.

As he sat down to finish his toast, a large screech owl swooped in from the window, landing easily on the table beside his plate and hooted low, holding out its leg to reveal a rolled letter. Draco recognized the bird as Baulder, one of his father's fastest owls. He stroked Baulder's chest with his finger for a second, and removed the letter, giving the bird what was left of his toast before the bird took flight again. Unrolling the letter, Draco read the short note sent to him by his father.

"Draco,

Your mother and I have decided to travel to South America for the holidays on a little private vacation. I want you to stay at the school for the winter holiday. I'll make it up to you this summer.

Your Father."

Draco sighed softly. Though he didn't generally like the rest of his family, he did like to spend Christmas with his parents at the manner... Ever year since he was born, he had come downstairs well before his parents had woken, and creep to the kitchen, eat as much of the Christmas candies and goods he could get his paws on, and then sit before the fire, looking over his many gifts wrapped in bright papers and ribbons until his parents woke up, usually no earlier than 8 o'clock and sometimes as late as 11. Now that he was sixteen, almost of age, he of course had planned on doing the exact same thing this year. His parents seemed to find it amusing to see Draco sitting in the firelight in his pajamas waiting for them to wake.

He dropped the letter and ran his hand through his platinum blond hair, sighing wistfully with the memories of the few happy times he had ever had with his parents, the few times they had dropped their aristocratic attitude and allowed him to be a child. They were few and far between, usually only Christmas and, on occasion, his birthday.

Lifting his head, Draco looked at the head table. Most of the professors had gone to their own families for Christmas, but the ones that were left looked cheerful enough about the holiday, except of course Snape who was only really happy when he was making a Gryffindor feel the size of a pixie. Dr. Matthews was not among them. Draco glanced at Emily. She didn't look ready to travel anywhere... Was she staying here for Christmas? If so, where was Dr. Matthews? Draco glanced around the hall. Harry Potter and Ronald Weasely were at the Gryffindor table playing wizard's chess, and two Ravenclaws looked well situated. Emily was the only Hufflepuff, and Malfoy the only Slytherin. Swallowing the last of his food along with his nervousness, Draco stood up, and moved to the Hufflepuff table.

"Emily..."he said softly so as not to startle her or attract the attention of the others in the room. Emily looked up at him slowly, stopping mid-word on the scroll she was writing on - knowing her, extra credit for Professor Snape. "... May I sit down?” Emily numbly nodded. With a deep sigh of relief, Draco sat beside her, folding his hands on the table.

*Aren't you leaving soon?* she wrote on another piece of parchment nearby.

"No... My mother and father left for South America for a private vacation. I'm staying here for Christmas this year,” he said softly, squaring his shoulders a little to hide how much it bothered him.

*We're in the same boat then. Dad went to Ireland on his own to gather information for a character in his new book.*

"At Christmas?”

*He usually forgets dates... like Christmas... Easter... my birthday... stuff like that.* She smiled wryly. *I'm used to it by now. He'll come back sometime next month, apologizing profusely for forgetting and buy me whatever I want.* Her expression about this certainly wasn't happy...

"Ah..."Draco was at a bit of a loss. He doubted there was anything sadder than a father forgetting your birthday and Christmas... "Well... since we'll both be alone, maybe we could spend Christmas together then?"

Emily slowly looked at him. *... Christmas... with me?*

Draco turned dark in the cheeks. "I have apologized to Granger, and I won't bother her again. I promised her that and now I make the same to you, that I won't bother Muggle-borns again. Emily... I meant what I said on Halloween. And the more time I spend apart from you, the more I realize I don't care about your heritage, I don't care about your parents or your blood... I care about you. I want to be with you. For who you are."

Now it was Emily's turn to blush. And darkly. Her sharp eyes were clear blue with the shock of his statement. Finally, she slowly scrolled out her simple answer. *... Okay.*