Trading Places

TITLE: Trading Spaces 9

RATING: R (slash warning m/m)

PAIRING: HG/SS, HP/DM, HP/HG (friendship)

A/N: We will be updating every two weeks, possibly with more than one installment,
depending on fate and life. Any constructive criticism is greatly appreciated.

SUMMARY: What do you call a cross between a Gryffindor and a Slytherin? A prefect!
Don't worry, it's not "what would happen in he had been sorted into . . ." Dumbledore
works in mysterious ways as Voldemort grows in power and daring. Other than that?
Shippyness, Snogging, Shagging, Snippy and Snarky! Trust me, it'll all make sense in a
little while.

GRATUITIES:

adedaded-soulz: Happy to entertain and so pleased to hear we're still in character. It's easy to get
carried away.

marasydnjade: Get a seatbelt for your chair, and we'll keep trying to impress you.


menecarkawan: No Jerry Springer, but we'll keep going.


LoMaRiBa: Welcome aboard!


Nicollette: Hang in there, the snoggage is coming. Just not yet.


Katy Kinneas: Thanks! Dramedy (comedy + drama) is our specialty, glad to hear it's working.


Aemos: Again, thank you for your constant reviews. We luv you.


zephiey: You are most welcome to stay in this world and play awhile.


Bre: You want to quote us? <absolutely delighted> Tell us if anyone laughed! Loved your
review. Loved it. Love knowing which parts you really like.


Keeta Maxwell: We're not telling about Draco, but let's just say that darkness plays a large role
in the D/H pairing.


Crazy-iris: Tacos *are* evil on the way out. They should have a warning label.


OzCrow: Wow? They really couldn't tempt you away?<blush> Hope you made it up to them.
Thanks for the review!


Diartemis: YES!! Thank you for enjoying the tension! And we don't mind yelling! Go ahead!


Rose of the Ravens: I love your name! How'd you think of it?


LenaLovely12: Oooh, you're good. . .


Paranoid-fan girl: I'm not q sur sure, I was sort of picturing something along the lines of the
books in "The Pagemaster" if that helps at all.


Redrum: Thanks for understanding. Appreciate that a lot.


Diosa: Your review was so helpful. It's great to know what parts are working.


crazy kitty: kind of like the Hermione-Draco bit myself.


grrbaby: Hope we keep earning those meows.


MadAboutHarry: Thanks for the review, quoting what you like is very helpful to us. *hugs*.


Sparkysparkles: keep giggling, we won't let them take you away!


Vasquaz: Welcome Aboard! Hope you like what's coming.


Chaos-Rose: Thanks! I think we do the same thing when we write it . . .


Tsuyuno: We'll take the Harry on top advice into consideration. Thank you so much for
reviewing all those chapters. If I were Frodo, I'd you you 'precious', except, y'know, not
in a creepy-Smeagle sort of way . . .


Abskii: Sorry about the withdrawl! Thanks for saying that. *hugs*.


Maddie: Aww, we luv you, too!

cadecades: Hope this chapter helps keep that boredom away.


kiwi-pixie: thank ye, thank ye! Glad the H/D stuff is working for you.


lite-crystal: Glad you like the combo, it was hard to decide how to classify this story on ff.net,

because of the dual pairing, but we're hoping it will catch on.


Drakon-Sword: Hello and a GREAT BIG welcome to you! That was our biggest review so far.
I'm so glad you found us! Thanks so much! Please stay, please?


Oda: You brought up an interesting point! Anybody else want to take a guess at the author's
gender? And thank you for the review, luved it!


MistressSilver: Thank you sooooooooooo much!


Kia: Good to be appreciated, we'll try to keep an original spin on everything.


cwtess: Worse than the Weasley Twins? They would've been the Weasley Twins mentors had
they been in Slytherin. Of course, that's their opinion!


S. Wing: Keep laughing, and we'll keep going - Deal?


Jessica Jeeves: Thank you and . . .


Apology: We have to apologize for taking so long, because we promised that we'd update every
twoks, ks, and Jessica was kind enough to point out how long it's been. So sorry! Real Life
stomped onto the scene in a great big, fire-breathing way! Hope the chapter is worth the wait and
we'll do better next time. Though, we would like to point out that we updated like three times in
a week once. No, really. We did. I swear! <cheesey grins>


****************************************************************************************************

Draco stumbled, falling into Harry as they moved down the hallway. Ignoring
the boy's mumbled protests, Harry slipped his right arm around Draco's waist,
supporting his weight. Firmly he grasped Draco's left wrist, applying pressure to
prevent any remaining boomslang venom from circulating. Harry's heart was still
racing and he was beginning to feel lightheaded from both adrenaline and the small
amount of venom he had ingested. He forced himself to walk quickly and stay upright.
Draco mumbled something as he leaned into Harry.

"What was that?" Harry asked softly, hoping he'd make it to the hospital wing
before they both collapsed.

"I said, if you wanted to hold my hand, all you had to do was ask." Malfoy
repeated a little louder, his face creased slightly in pain as he mockingly used Harry's
earlier phrasing.

"Did the snake bite give you a sense of humor, Malfoy? I'm impressed." Harry
laughed lightly, but worry was evident in his eyes. He looked up and saw the door to
the hospital wing. Thank Merlin!

"All these years, that's all I had to do to impress you? Tell a joke?" Draco sagged
against him, his breathing shallow, his face ashen.

"You were trying to impress me?" Harry paused outside the door, trying to
remember a spell to open the door without dropping Draco.

"Impress you - show you up - something like that." Draco lifted his head,
swaying slightly, but managed to smirk slightly. "Well which is it Potter, in or out?"
n." n." Harry disregarded the innuendo, and gave a brief nod. Forget the spell.e kie kicked the door open and dragged Draco through it.kingking his way over to one of
the beds, he lifted Draco onto it, before sitting down on the edge of it, waves of
dizziness washing over him.

"What'd you say to that snake, Potter?" Draco's eyes were barely open, his voice
heavy with drowsiness, sounded far away.

"Told her you didn't mean to come near her nest. Told her I, er, knew you."
Harry gripped the bed frame with one hand to make the floor stop spinning.

"D'you tell that snake not to bite me again, Hero?" He was shaking.

"Yes, I did."

"Like it when you speak parseltongue . . ." His eyes drifted shut.

Still clutching Draco's wrist with one hand, Harry turned and shouted,
"MADAME POMFREY! WE NEED HELP!"

***********


Hermione sat in Snape's living room, clutching a cup of herbal tea. Professor
Snape had suggested that they retire to his rooms. He had been discussing the finer
points of espionage and wanted to give her a few details about the Death Eaters.
"Don't you think Harry should be back by now?"

"You haven't paid attention to a word I've said, have you?" Severus said with
disgust. "Too busy fretting over the hapless Mr. Potter."

"No, I was paying attention!" His expression told her that he was skeptical.
"Really! Do you want to quiz me?"

"No," He snapped. "I know how much you enjoy tests."

"You explained your relationship with Sr. Malfoy. I still don't get how you
could be the 'friend' of someone you loath. You were interested in the Death Eaters
because you could practice spells and potions that were, shall we say, less than ethical.
You refused to tell me why you left the Death Eaters. And I'm still not clear on that
'toy' thing--"

"Let's just stick to the more important things ,alright?"

"Spoilsport." She singsonged.

Severus smiled at her. "You're not a l a little bit afraid of me anymore, are
you?"

"No. Are you afraid of me?"

"And why would I be afraid of you?" He scoffed.

"I did set you on fire."

"True." He nodded.

"And I stole from your personal stash of potion ingredients." She pointed out.

"Yes, you did." He agreed, he couldn't wait to see what she said next.

"Personally, I think I have a knack for this whole evil thing. It's almost too
easy."

"Do try and pace yourself." He made a cenng mng motion with his hand.
"You've only been a Slytherin for a week or so."

"So why you're telling me all your spying secrets . . ."

"Yes?" He prodded.

"How *do* you keep those robes so shiny?" Her eyes widened. "Is it personal to
you, did you cast a spell on yours? Is it a Death Eater perk? Like, are Draco's robes that
shiny -"

"And what makes you think that Draco has Death Eater robes?" He leaned back
with a shocked countenance.

"What, like it's a big secret he's evil?" She frowned. "He confessed it to me when
I was in his room."

"And what were you doing in his room?!" Snape looked horrified. "Never mind.
I *know* what girls do in his room. Don't tell me."

"Not what you were thinking. It had nothing to do with 'toys' of any kind, I
promise you." She hastened to reassure him. "Besides, I think Draco's kinda gay."

"Really?" He sounded fascinated. Then he frowned. "That's beside the point."

"I was just seeing if I was right about my suspicions. I confronted him and he
folded. Told you I was good at this whole being evil thing."

Rune flew into the room, looking rather upset. "Severus! Severus!"

"Rune, what is it?" Snape stood up, covering a smile in his hand. Hermione
turned in her seat to regard the eagle.

"It's Draco . . .he's been bitten by a boomslang. Harry Potter brought him into
the hospital wing an hour ago. Madame Pomfrey has been pumping them full of anti-venom since she found them passed out. There's been no response." Rune shifted from
side to side on the chair she was perching on. "I knew you'd want to know as soon as
possible . . ."

"Oh, Merlin." Hermione gasped. She pressed a hand to her chest. "But they'll
be fine, right? What did Madame Pomfrey say?"

"What's *she* doing here?" Rune appeared very unhappy by this turn of events.

"She's visiting with me, Rune." Severus said, moved by the distress he saw on
his prefect's face. "Mr. Potter's in very good hands, Hermione."

"You called her by her first name!" Rune fluffed out. "You never do that with
students!"

"Did Madame Pomfrey say anything else about their condition?"

"She thinks they'll pull through. She said that she got to them just in time." The
bird offered. She, too, was worried about someone special. Draco Malfoy was Snape's
prize pupil. Losing him would distress the professor.

"Thank you, Rune." It was a dismissal.

"But I just got here. Wouldn't you like to wait for the news about them together?
By ourselves?" She asked pointedly.

"That will be all." Severus said, oblivious to her. His gaze was riveted on
Hermione. He reached out and put a comforting hand on the girl's shoulder. "Is there
anything I can do?"

Hermione looked up at him tearfully and his heart lurched. "Can I stay here
with you?"

"Of course."

Rune was incensed. "But. . .but, I'm upset too!" She tried to fake a sniffle but it
sounded like she had a sinus problem.

"Good evening, Rune." Severus said. His teeth were clenched.

She had the feeling the professor was about to lose patience with her. Well, fine.
She didn't care about anything right now. "You should return to your rooms, Miss
Granger. Being here this late at night. . .people will talk."

"Dead birds can't tell tales."

Rune squawked at him, utterly appalled by his behavior. "Fine! I've had it up to
my pin feathers with you! You'll rue the day you mistreated me! Rue the day!" She
crowed as she flew out of the room.

Hermione hadn't even looked up. He chucked her under the chin and gave her a
half-smile. "Now *that* was a death threat."



***********


Harry slowly opened his eyes. It was near sunrise, but still rather dark. Briefly
he wondered how many days had past. He turned his head to find Draco watching him.
For a moment he thought Draco was going to thank him. "What's the matter, Malfoy?"

"I was just thinking," He held his bandaged hand up. "I've finally got the
answer to a question Slytherin's been pondering since our third year."

Harry sighed. "And what would that be?"

"Whether Harry Potter spits or swallows." Draco's eyes glittered with mischief.
He waited for Harry to glare at him and say something about the crassness of the
statement or call him an ingrate. Instead, Harry grinned.

"Well, I guess that just leaves one question unanswered, Malfoy."

"What's that?"

"Does Draco Malfoy spit or swallow?" Harry chuckled as Draco rolled over,
refusing to reply.

"I heard it was both." Snippy twisted his way up Harry's bedframe.

"According to receiver's preference." Snarky added. Harry laughed out loud.

Draco turned over, narrowing his eyes as he spotted the source of Harry's
amusement. "What are they doing here?"

"Visiting the sick." Snippy hissed, turning to look at Draco.

"And stealing the sick's chocolate frogs." Snarky tossed one from a previously
unnoticed pile on Harry's bedside table to Snippy. Atop the stack was a card from
Dumbledore. Draco had an identical stash.

"You two would steal candy from a baby." Harry hissed back at them.

"Now that's just ridiculous." Snippy said between swallows. Harry arched a
brow.

"Babies never get the good stuff. Everyone knows that." Snarky clarified.

"Are you going to answer me or not, Hero?" Draco snapped impatiently, trying
to cover his intense interest in the parsel-conversation.

"They've come to eat our candy." Harry declared. "Feeling a little nervous
about snakes, Malfoy? Lucky you're not a Slytherin anymore, huh?"

"You seem to fit in well there, Hero. Maybe our infallible hat made a mistake
with everyone's favorite Gryffindor." Malfoy intoned snidely.

"Did you hear that, Harry? You're his favorite!" Snippy wiggled. "You might
be able to steal him away from Snape, yet!"

"That was sarcasm." Harry declared.

"Really? *That*? Huh." Snippy snickered. "Did you hear that, Snarky?
Evidently, *that* was 'sarcasm.'"

" is is this *sarcasm* you speak of? I've never heard of such a thing." Snarky
looked perplexed.

"Ok, ok, I get it. You two *invented* sarcasm." Harry held his hands up to stave
off more commentary. It was in vain.

"I wouldn't say invented. More like, perfected." Snippy stated casually.

Harry ignored him, turning to his human problem. "I was *not* placed in the
wrong House!" He declared sharply.

"Not anymore - the oversight has been corrected." Malfoy grinned. "Why so
defensive, Hero?"

"Sort of like Da Vinci didn't *invent* painting, he just *improved* it." Snarky
continued. Harry glanced at him, but focused back on Draco.

"I *belong* in Gryffindor, I know it." Harry asserted firmly.

"It's almost like it just goes better with us." Snippy replied, philosophically.
"The way peanut butter goes better with jelly."

"Or chocolate!" Snarky affirmed.

"If you know it, why are you so upset, Hero?" Draco shot back.

"Precisely!" Snippy nodded his head. "I would even go so far as to say we've
put an original spin on it."

"I am NOT upset!" Harry raised his voice, sitting up completely now.

"Yeah . . . like taking the song 'Fools Rush In' and making it reggae." Snarky
smiled.

Draco sat up as well, turning to dangle his legs over the bedside. "You most
certainly are. You're practically yelling." Draco's smile grew more sinister. "What's
the matter, Hero? Doubting yourself?"

"Or like Prince! Do you remember that 'kiss' song he did?" Snippy's eyes
gleamed.

"NO!" Harry matched Draco's stance, then, trying to seem calm, "I am not."

"The one where he uses the -pit-pitched voice?" Snarky asked. "That was very
original - not too pleasant, but original."

"Exactly! Just like us - original and not too pleasant." Snippy laughed. "Thee,
thee, thee . . ."

"What is it you're not telling me, Potter?" Draco leaned forward, the fierce glint
of a predator in his eyes.

"You don't have to be rich to rule my world . . ." Snarky began in a high, off-key
hiss.

Harry stared horrified at the snakes, but decided commenting might encourage
them. " *I* have nothing to hide, Malfoy."

"Neither do I, Potter." Draco reached for his sleeve.

"You don't have to be coo - " Snippy broke off. "Is he going to strip?"

"Wouldn't be the first time!" Snarky crowed.

Harry's hand closed over Draco's halting the movement. Draco raised a brow at
him. "What's this."

"Gryffindor trust." Harry met Draco's gaze head on.

"Doesn't prove you're a Gryffindor, Hero."

"What's going on?" Snippy demanded to know. "Why does he keep calling you
that?"

"Awww - you're his hero, Harry!" Snarky cackled.

"Do you two need a minute alone?" Snippy offered. "Because we could sneak
away, y'know."

"Yessss . . . there's a perfectly good spying point over there by the cupboards."
Snarky chimed in helpfully.

Harry's eyes never left Draco's, his grip still firm on his arm. Draco stared back
intently, searching Harry's eyes for the information he was hiding.

"Are they going to snog?" Snippy waived his tail in gleeful excitement.

"I just want your extra time and your . . . "

They both joined in and made the requisite kissing noises.

"Shut up!" Harry hissed furiously, unnerved by Draco's intent gaze. Though
the snakes didn't seem to be affected by his anger, as the parseltongue words left his
mouth, he felt a slight tremble go through Draco's hand.

"Oooo. . . Harry, I think he likes that!" Snippy cried.

"I could be your fantasy - " Snarky sang.

"You *were* supposed to be in Slytherin." Draco's whisper held notes of
discovery and conviction. Then, he continued thoughtfully, "But how did you end up
in . . ."

"Shut up, Malfoy!" Harry jumped to his feet, releasing the blond's arm.

"You changed it somehow." Draco ignored the command, recalling Harry's
desperate, if inaudible, murmuring at the sorting ceremony. "You *told* it not to put
you in Slytherin."

"Maybe, you could be mine." The snakes finished slyly in unison.

"So what if I did! Dumbledore said our choices determine our destiny." Harry
muttered darkly, thinking that the words had seemed much more comforting in his
second year.

"I knew it!" Draco stood. "You belong in Slytherin."

"No more than you belong in Gryffindor." Harry glared at him.

"Well, let's just go up to the headmaster's office and find out then, shall we?"
Draco gestured towards the door. "You can put the hat on and find out where you
should be *without* cheating this time, Hero."

"Fine. Let's go."

"NOOOOO!!!!" The snakes yelled.

"Harry, you can't!" Snippy shuddered.

"That way lies the path of being dropped into the Forbidden Forest . . .

"With large spiders!" They were ignored.

"C'mon then Hero." Draco cupped Harry's face with his uninjured hand, his
thumb stroking Harry's jaw. "Let's see if those pretty Avada Kedavra green eyes of
yours really match your true *House* colors."

*************


Hermione rushed through the hospital wing doors, skidding to a halt as her eyes
landed on the two boys. "Harry! I came as soon as I . . ." She trailed off as her brain
registered how close to each other they stood and Malfoy's hand on Harry's face. The
boys hastily stepped back, Draco's hand falling to his side, Harry blushing slightly.
"Am I interrupting something?"

"HINEY!" The snakes shrieked.

"They were about to snog!" Snarky whined.

"We were not." Harry groaned, sitting on his bed. "No, 'Mione. Nothing at all."

"That's what you think, Potter." Draco said, just loud enough for only Harry to
hear.

"See! Draco said you were!" Snarky pointed out.

"He didn't hear what I said to *you*." Harry corrected him, his head starting to
hurt from talking to too many people - and snakes - at the same time.

"Good." Said Hermione. "Because Professor Snape is - "

"Right behind you." Severus finished for her. He turned to Draco. "I trust you
have survived your latest adventure with Mr. Potter?"

Draco nodded, not wanting to comment on the fact that Harry had in fact saved
his life. He glanced at the dark haired boy, who looked a little offended.

Harry was about to explain that he had saved Draco after the boy had made a
very stupid mistake when Hermione threw her arms around him. "I'm just glad you're
alright! If you had been hurt because of something *I*asked you to do -"

"No need to take on the guilt of his actions, Miss Granger." Severus said quickly.
The group looked at him with him with puzzled expressions, the snakes narrowing
their eyes in suspicion. He hurried to add to the statement, fixing his glare on Harry,
"We all know where the blame lies."

Harry ignored Snape, used to his unfairness. "It wasn't that big of deal,
Hermione. Really." Harry had to believe that. So, he sucked on Draco Malfoy, who
hasn't? Harry's complexion blotched with red. Sucked on his *hand*. Merlin!

Hermione grew more concerned. "Why are you all red?" She pressed her hand
to his forehead. "Maybe the poison . . ."

"No, he's fine." Draco smirked, knowingly. "Why aren't you more worried
about me? I was the one who got bit!"

"Did you get the boomslang skin?" Snape asked.

"Se- Professor, I hardly think that's the appropriate question to be asking."
Hermione frowned. Something was going on between the two of them. First, Harry
lied about seeing Draco the night before. Then she found him in a possible intimate
embrace in the hospital. Now Harry was blushing while Draco smirked at him. "Why
don't you two explain exactly what transpired?"

"Well, I was petting Griff-gruff when Potter, here, burst into my room-"

"How did he get in?" Snape scowled at Harry.

"The password was 'draconus'." Harry said. "Besides, it's not like I went in
there with a boomslang and sprung it on him! I was getting him for our patrol and to
run *your* errand."

"Excellent point, Mr. Potter. Did you get the boomslang skin?"

"Then what happened?" Hermione sat down next to Harry, encouraging him to
continue. The snakes dived out of the way before she sat on them, hissing angrily.
While Harry was distracted listening to their latest stream of expletives, Draco decided
to continue with the story.

"Then Potter hit on me and jumped out of the window-"

"Harry! You didn't!" Hermione gasped.

"Of course not! I would never hit on-"

"I meant, jumped out the window." She corrected him before he could finish.

"Well, yeah. The tower's high enough for a dive!" Harry defended. Hermione
was obviously not pleased with this. He used to do it all the time, but once he had
jumped out the window while she was visiting Ron in their room and she had flipped
out on him, making him promise never to do that again and asking if he had a death
wish. "Anyways, we made a lap around the castle-"

"During which Potter tried to knock me off my broom, unsuccessfully." Draco
interjected.

"Why don't you whine a little more? I barely brushed you." Harry glowered at
him. The snakes looked on with approval of his comments.

"So what would you call that, Potter? A love tap?" Draco sneered.

"I was just playing. And you shoved back." He shrugged, ignoring the gleam in
the eyes of Snippy and Snarky. They were going to have a party with that remark. A
big party, with hats and noise makers. "So we landed and headed into the forest."

"Did you get the boomslang skin?" Snape asked again. Hermione fought the
urge to turn around and elbow him.

"We found a nesting site-"

"Wait a minute! You never told me it was a nesting site." Draco accused.

"Well, I would have thought it was obvious that in order to find snake skin, we
would have to look in a nesting area." Harry said, caustically.

"So sorry, Potter. I'm not that intimate with snake life."

Snippy looked at Snarky. "You don't think he's implying that Harry's having
some kind of illicit relationship with one of us do you?"

"Well only a dim git like you wouldn't look where you were stepping while
gathering snake skin." Harry shot back.

"Ah, so you *did* get the boomslang skin?" Snape interrupted the arguement.

"Right, boomslangs. So I was reaching for a skin when this snake leapt out of
nowhere and bit me." Draco gestured with his injured hand.

"Well, Nova wouldn't have bitten you if you didn't almost step on her eggs."
Harry crossed his arms over his chest.

Draco looked flabbergasted. He had no idea how to deal with the boy who had
saved his life defending the snake that had bit him. He appealed to Snape for help.
"He's on a first name basis with snakes, sir!"

Harry turned to Snape to see what he would say to this 'accusation'. "Did you or
did you not get the boomslang skin?"

Hermione's frown deepened. "So how did you get bit, Harry?"

"Oh, I didn't." He said offhandedly. Snape, Hermione, Snippy and Snarky
turned to look at Harry with confounded expressions. Draco regarded him with a lifted
eyebrow. Harry scowled, and shut his mouth tightly.

"I don't understand. How did you get poisoned if you didn't get bit?"
Hermione furrowed her brow, trying to figure this out.

"He sort of- "Draco broke off. It was obvious that this was bothering Harry, and
he loved to fluster him, but he wasn't sure that he wanted to admit that he had been
saved by the boy-who-lived.

"He what?!" Demanded Snarky.

"Yeah, Harry! Tell us what happened."

"I sucked the venom out of his hand." Harry sighed. He looked up to see
Malfoy gazing at him, his eyes heated to molten temperatures.

"That was so dangerous, Harry!" Hermione breathed.

"Then we put pressure on Draco's wrist to stop the spread of the poison and flew
back here." Harry tried to control his blushing, and vaguely realized he had said
'Draco', not 'Malfoy'.

"With the boomslang skin?" Snape questioned.

"You mean you were able to fly after being bitten by a boomslang?" Hermione
looked a little shocked as she looked at Draco.

"Well, no. Potter . . . brought me back on his broom." Draco stared at the floor.

"And you got the -" Before Snape could as again, Harry tossed him the bag full
of the skins. "Good. Now, since you two have had a two-day respite, I will expect you
to take up rounds again tonight. don don't be late for dinner. The new Muggle studies
professor has finally finished gathering things and having them sent here, and thus
shall be arriving to stay later this day. The headmaster has ordered a special feast to
officially welcome him to the staff."

The snakes wiggled in approval. A feast, plus someone new to steal from. They
snuck off, chattering excitedly and wondering if the new professor would have an
extensive music collection.

Snape turned to Hermione. "If you would accompany me to the dungeons, we
can start that potion now." She nodded, and with one last hug for Harry, hurried to
start on her new potion. "As for you, Mr. Potter. I suggest you take Mr. Malfoy to
look for his broom. And try to not to endanger yourself or Mr. Malfoy this time. The
rest of us do not have days to laze about the hospital wing."

**********


Hermione held the door to Snape's rooms open as he deftly maneuvered around
her despite the heavy cauldron he carried. The potion was supposed to sit undisturbed
for several days, and he wanted to keep an eye on it. "Thank you, Hermione."

"You're welcome, Severus." She stood, biting her lip for a moment.

"What is it?" He sighed as he turned from placing the cauldron carefully in his
work space.

"What's what?" She stalled.

"I know that look." He watched her expectantly.

"I just wanted to, um, well . . ."

"Yes?"

"Thank you for last night." As she heard the words leave her mouth she blushed
to the roots of her hair. "And that came out a lot more dirty than it sounded in my
head."

Snape grinned. "May I ask what the spontaneous, if less than clean, gratitude is
for?"

"For being so calming. For letting me stay here." Hermione gestured helplessly.
"For sleeping on your own couch - "

"Don't mention it. No, really, don't mention it." He scowled and turned away
from her. Hermione had fallen asleep in his chair last night after he had secretly put a
few drops of a calming potion in her tea. At first he was going to put her back in her
room, but he had been afraid she would wake disoriented. So he had levitated her onto
his bed, removed her shoes and thrown a comforter over her. He had slept a few hours
on the couch. When she had awoken, she had seemed rather embarrassed and had run
out of his rooms, mumbling about checking on Harry. Worried, he had called after her
and when she hadn't stopped, had followed her to the Hospital Wing. "It was the least I
could do."

"It was the most you could do." She corrected him. "I was so worried . . ." She
closed her eyes. "Though I suppose I should be used to it by now."

"Mr. Potter does seem to get himself into a lot of dangerous situations." Snape
drawled caustically as he sat down in his favorite chair, indicating the one across from
his. Hermione sat down uncertainly. She had meant to thank him and then run off to
her rooms, but she found that being near him made her feel safer. She used to feel that
way around Harry and Ron, but lately it had changed. Being near Harry did not feel
safe anymore, and it wasn't because of the threat of Voldemort.

"It's not his fault!" Hermione protested, but it was half-hearted. "Not always."

Snape raised his brows at her as if to say, *indeed?*, but let the subject drop. "In
any case, with Mr. Potter safe and sound, and the first draft of our potion nearly
complete, we should turn to other matters."

"Other matters?" She asked blankly.

"Yes. Fortunately there shouldn't be another Death Eaters meeting until after
school starts. That gives us time to plan, and you time to train." He steepled his hands
together under his chin.

"I'm not sure I understand. Train to do what?" She looked worried once more.

"Well, I'm afraid you're going to have to learn some of the dark arts, to add to
your credibility and for general defense. Also, I would like you to learn some hand to
hand combat skills. Most wizards, particularly of the dark persuasion, feel it is beneath
them, and that can give you an advantage." He paused, holding her gaze. "We will
also have to work on acting as a fluid pair. One slip up, and we'll both be exposed."

"How exactly . . . I mean, what would that . . .entail?" She tried not to blush
again.

"Well, spending time together for one. I need to know everything about you,
from your eating habits to how you like your pumpkin juice to your favorite color." He
expounded.

"I'm sorry, but why?" She looked perplexed.

"I understand if the idea is unpleasant, but it *is* essential -"

"It's not unpleasant." She said softly. He looked startled. "I just don't
understand. Is there going to be a pop-quiz? Something along the lines of 'let's see
whose girlfriend might be a spy'?"

His lips twitched. "Not exactly. You won't need any parchment. But there will
be Social Balls, formal dinners, weekend gatherings as well as meetings." At her
shocked expression, he added. "These people think of themselves as high society,
Hermione. They like to plan death and destruction like civilized people, at a party with
shrimp cocktail."

"So what you're saying is that being a Death Eater is like belonging to a yacht
club, without the pretty boats?"

"Actually, there are boats sometimes. Usually less pretty and more secretive,
basically used for dumping bodies . . ."

Hermione sighed. "Evil boats?"

"Pretty much."

She looked up sharply, thinking of a movie she once saw. "The shrimp cocktail
isn't evil though, is it?"

"Not so far." He shot her a serious look. "But don't touch the pate."

***********


Harry and Draco crossed Hogwarts' grounds quickly, headed into the woods
once more. Harry's mouth was drawn in a tight line, indicating he was in no mood to
talk. He pretended to ignore Draco, but when he noticed the blond wince slightly at
their rapid pace, he surreptitiously slowed up a bit. Draco glanced at him out of the
corner of his eye.

"Let's have a little chat, Hero." Draco crossed his arms imperiously over his chest
as he walked, carefully choosing his steps in his high boots. Harry looked at him
sharply a moment, as if wondering what he was doing, before continuing on as if Draco
had never spoken.

"Let's not."

"That was rude." Malfoy reprimanded him. "What shall we talk about? Hmm . .
."

"Malfoy . . ." Harry sighed.

"I know. Let's talk about lies." Draco announced the topic with flair. "What do
we call people who tell lies? Liars! Now, let me think. . . do we know a liar?"

"You?" Harry suggested.

"No, I was going to say you." Draco grinned.

"I am not a liar." Harry said vehemently. Why was Draco making conversation?
Where was this going?

"Oh, really?" Draco quirked an eyebrow at him as they reached the forest and
began moving through the cool shade. "So then, when Hermione asked you about the
other night, you told her all about our little conversation in the woods?"

"Since when do you call her Hermione?" Harry asked harshly.

"Since three days ago." He replied flippantly. "And now you're changing the
subject. That's practically an admission of guilt."

"Is not." Harry looked abashed at his response. He hurried to add in what he
hoped was a semi-mature manner, "I have nothing to feel guilty about."

"So you don't even feel guilty about lying to Hermione?" Draco smirked.

"No." Harry shook his head, aggravated. "I mean, no, I didn't lie to . . ." He
trailed off, it was obvious that he had been caught in the lie. "Truthfully? I didn't think
it was worth mentioning."

Draco didn't even bat an eye, he merely maintained the silence until it stretched
into what seemed like infinity. He was familiar with Harry's tendency to lash out when
backed into a corner.

Harry gritted his teeth. "Fine. I just didn't want to worry her."

"By telling her what you were doing?" Draco gave a short laugh. "Yes, I see how
that would be reassuring."

Harry glared at him. "Is there a point, or are you just trying to distract me from
how worn out you really are?"

"Hmm, speaking of the snakebite incident, exactly why didn't you want to tell
them how you came to my rescue, Hero?" Draco's eyes flashed.

"You didn't tell them, either." Harry pointed out.

"I didn't want to tell them that you had helped me in any way. You however,
didn't want to tell them *how* you helped me. Now why is that?" They stopped just
outside the boomslang nest. "Accio broom!"

"Perhaps I was repulsed at having to recall that I had touched you." Harry
glowered at him as his broom flew into his hand.

"I don't think so." Draco said arrogantly, stepping a little closer to him. "I don't
think that repulsion had anything to do with it at all."

"Just what are tryitrying to say, Malfoy?" Harry's heart sped up as Draco came
even closer to him.

"What do you think I'm trying to say, Potter?" Draco reached a hand out as if to
repeat the gesture he had made earlier and cup Harry's face in his hands. "Why don't
you tell me what you were thinking when you were sucking the venom out of me?"

"I - what was that?" Their strange conversation was interrupted by the distinct
sound of something skittering towards them. Both boys froze, barely a foot apart,
Draco's arm extended midway between them. Slowly they turned their heads toward
the sound. There stood three abnormally large spiders, gnashing their fangs at them.

Harry moved on pure instinct, grabbing Draco's arm around the elbow, feeling
Draco's hand close on his own arm he began to back up. His wand was in his robe
pocket, he had to get to it! As they each reached for their wands, the spiders spit out a
string of webbing. Without thought, they each threw up a protective hand, murmuring
"Expelliarmous!"

Draco felt a tremendous vibration move through him, something a muggle
would compare to electric shock. He felt something reach inside of him, entangling in
his magic and pulling it up through him. His fingers clamped convulsively on Harry's
arm as the power of it swept over him, a rush he hand never felt the like of before. And
when he whispered the spell, he heard Harry's voice in his mind, overlapping,
compelling, combining with his own, before it blew him back onto the ground, his eyes
full of the tree-branch scattered sky, his mind full of Harry Potter.

Harry felt as if a swirling vortex rose up out of him, pulling wind and energy
from deep inside him, as well as around him. He felt Draco's magic rushing towards
him as if by his command. His fingers gripped Malfoy's arm as the rush of it overtook
him. He whispered the spell, hearing the echo of Malfoy's voice entwining within his
own, before the blast of the spell threw him on top of Malfoy, his vision filled with the
flashing silver of eyes.

The spiders had flown so far back into the forest they couldn't be seen or heard
by the young wizards. Harry panted, staring into Malfoy's eyes. "What the - "

"Bloody hell was that?" Malfoy finished, sounding a little breathless himself.

"I'm not sure. It was incredible -"

"Powerful. We didn't even -"
ave ave our wands." Harry finished, too caught up in the what had happened to
really consider the ramifications of what had happened. He shivered, for some reason
feeling as if he had just been sprayed with ice water. He glanced over the body
underneath him, realizing that he still grasped Malfoy's arm. For some reason, he
didn't want to let go just yet. "Are you alright? Did you hurt anything?"

With a mischievous glint in his eye, Malfoy bucked his hips up against Harry's,
grinning at Potter's gasp of surprise. "Nothing important."

Harry stared at him for a moment, as if trying to determine what Malfoy had just
done. He lowered his head a little, blocking Draco from seeing anything but his face.
"I'm freezing."

"I'm on fire." Draco felt as if he was lying next to an inferno. He could picture
green flames licking at his flesh. He was starting to sweat. Harry felt cool everywhere
they touched, and it was hard not luxuriate in that feeling. He looked into Potter's eyes.
"Gonna let me up?"

"Oh . . .yeah." Harry tried to get to his feet, touching as little of Malfoy as
possible. It was so tempting though. He felt so warm. He stood, looking at down at
Malfoy, stretched out on his back at Harry's feet. He extended a hand to help him up,
which Draco accepted. Harry was starting to shake. "We should get back."

"Yeah." Draco looked at Harry for a moment, unbuttoning the top button of his
shirt, wishing there was a breeze. "I don't think we should tell anybody about this,
Potter. Not until we figure out what happened."

"But, shouldn't we tell Dumbledore?" Harry wrapped his arms around his body
for warmth.

"Not just yet, Hero. We need to think this through a little before we involve
him." At least he did. Draco climbed on his broom. "Why don't we just ride my broom
back, I don't want to run into anymore spiders."

Harry nodded and climbed onto the back of Draco's broom. He put his hands on
Draco's side as they took off, for balance, wishing he could lean forward against the
warmth of the other's back, but stayed upright, angling his body so that Draco was
shielding him from the breeze. He had to talk to Hermione. She would know what to
do.

**********


Dr. Troy Tatterton eyed the large man who lumbered beside him as they
approached a gothic castle. He was a dashing man with black hair and brown eyes. He
didn't sport robes or even a suit. He was dressed in black jeans and a grey cashmere
sweater. Troy had been dubious about his new position when he'd met Hagrid at the
train station. If all the professors at Hogwarts dressed this way, he was going to have
some serious work on his hands.

"So, what kind of a statement are you making here?" He gestured to Hagrid's
smudged clothing. "Lumberjack?"

"A lumber what?"

"Never mind. What kind of accommodations should I expect?" After first sight,
he was thinking Braveheart and that was a big no. Hagrid looked at him questioningly.
"For example, where do you live?"

"Oh, I've got a hut on the edge of the property. I have a fireplace, usually with a
cauldron full of soup bubbling for visitors." He thought the good professor was fishing
for an invite. "Very humble but just the thing if I do say so meself."

"Dear God." Troy was horrified. "And I will be living in a. . .a hovel?"

"Hut."

"Same diff, Martha Stewart, the goddess, would not approve and neither would
I."

"You know Martha? She graduated in-"

"So not the point." He gulped. "Where's my hut?"

"Oh, you'll be livin' in the castle with the rest of the professors." He thought a
moment. "And the ghosts, of course."

That was marginally better. But if there was flourescent lighting, he was out of
there. It made him look puffy. "Fabulous." Hold up, did he say ghosts?

As they walked across the lawn, Troy saw a small cat regally strutting across the
grass. Being a great cat lover, he called. "Here kitty , kitty."

"Oh, you shouldn'ta done that." Hagrid shook his head.

"Kitty?!?" The small creature came into the moonlight, illuminating his wings.

"Did that cat just say something?" Troy said in a whisper. Maybe he'd had one
too many margaritas at the hotel.

"Yes, I did. By the way, it's rude to not answer when you're asked a question."
Griff Gruff padded over and sat down in the man's path. "And just who are you?"

"This is Dr. Tatterton, Gruff. He didn't know who you were."

Griff Gruff was incredulous. "You're a Muggle!"

"Excuse me, furball. No one told me that talking house pets would be part of the
deal."

"It's good think you are wearing that cashmere or I'd slice it open!" He smirked.
"Maybe I'll just have the snakes steal it for me and I'll sleep on it."

"Cat fur on cashmere!" He gasped. "You wouldn't!"

"I would and I will!" Griff Gruff stood taller. "Just for your lack of proper
respect."

"Well, pardon me, Fluffy. I'll be more careful in the future."

"No, Fluffy's in the dungeon." Hagrid added. "That's Griff Gruff."

"Fluffy?" He looked at the griffin. "One of your brothers cough up a hairball on
the rug?"

"That's revolting."

"No, Fluffy's my three-headed-dog." He explained.

"Why not? I'm living in a castle with ghosts, magicians, a talking cat, and a
three-headed dog. All we need now are elves."

"They work in the kitchen." Hagrid informed him. "Innit that right, Gruff?"

"Oh, that's right. You're name's Griff Gruff, isn't it, kitty?" Troy laughed.
"How very Sesame Street."

He had no idea what that meant. "You are strange and displeasing despite your
good taste in clothing." Griff Gruff walked away, tail in the air. "You'd better watch
yourself, Dr. Muggle. And you should watch out for," he whirled around and made
his voice dark and mysterious. "The evil book."

Troy through his hands up in the air. "Is nothing safe? The books are evil?!"

"No!" Wild laughter was heard from the bushes. Lockhart's book leapt out of
them and sprung on Troy's chest. It snagged his cashmere sweater and ran off into the
night cackling. "Just this one!"

Troy stared down at his rapidly unraveling sweater, the giant of a man standing
next to him, and the glorified house cat that was sauntering up the front stairs.
"Where's Buffy when you need her?"