Seraphim

Title: Seraphim

Author: Faline

Summary: style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Harry wakes up and gets the biggest shock
of his lifetime. Well, maybe not the
biggest but DAMN, he gets freaked out.

A/N: First HP story ever. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Tried to do something original. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> If it comes back to bite me in the ass, at
least I’ll have an excuse right?

Chapter Nine

I jumped from the bed and looked down at my eventual
fiancée in horror. What in the bloody
hell had I done. Severus stretched, a
content smile on his face, and gazed at me adoringly. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> What in the BLOODY HELL had I done?

"I\'m sorry . . . " style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I backed up slowly, trying to inch my way
towards his door. He sat up quickly,
the look on his face quickly changing to confusion. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> My heart clenched, feeling the hurt that\'d
I\'d caused him seep into the air and into my very soul.

"This was wrong, I\'m so sorry professor."

I grabbed the closest thing possible and pulled it on and
I turned and bolted from the room.
Halfway down the corridor to my own rooms, I slowed my pace, finally
coming to a halt to lean against the wall.
Taking some deep, calming breaths, I organized my thoughts and
formulated the best plan possible.

I should go talk to Albus.
Tell him what had happened. Surely
the man wouldn\'t consider it a serious transgression as I was not a
student. And then I realized that in
the eyes of everyone except Dumbledore and myself, I was. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Oh, bugger it.

Running a reassuring hand down my front, I suddenly
realized that the robe I was wearing had quite a few buttons on it. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> My gaze snapped to my clothing. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Damn.
Severus\'s robes.

From my last location, I heard my name, screamed with
something akin to frustration and desperation. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> The owner of my currant garb came charging out
of nowhere, almost running past me. He
caught sight of me though and grabbed my arm.
"What exactly is the matter?"

I swallowed hard. I
didn\'t really know what to say. I
couldn\'t very well tell the truth.
That could destroy what we’d have one day and I knew I could never do
that. No matter what it came down
to. I just couldn\'t.

Something inside of me was telling me to go back to his
rooms and talk to him. About anything
really, so long as there was a long conversation involved. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> So, I blurted out, “I think we need to
talk.” And started marching back the way I came. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Behind me, he chuckled.

At the doors to his chamber, I allowed him to let us
in. He never questioned my knowledge
of his wards and I never elaborated. I
think he just accepted that there were some things that were better left
unknown. At least I hoped so.

I collapsed with a sigh on his sofa. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> He joined me, taking a seat in the chair
across from me. With a wave of his
hand there was a steaming cup of tea perched on my kneed and a blanket
wrapped around my shoulders.

For some reason, I felt like crying. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Everything was so confused and
upsetting. Even the fact that Severus
had just managed to give me his favorite tea, something that he reserves for
a select few. I’d wonder what exactly
his connection to Seraphim was, however in light of normal\'>recent events, I don’t think that’s a
problem any more.

But what were they
before I got here?

He looked at me patiently.
I was so used to this look having received it more than I cared to
remember in the last 36 hours. After a
few moments of his questioning gaze, he leaned back. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I took the slight opportunity to peruse the
sight he was offering.

Slightly tousled.
Completely satisfied, yet extremely worried. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Remembering of a different time
perhaps. He’s got that far away look
in his eyes that I remember from many of our conversations by firelight in
this very room.

He leaned forward, forearms rested on his knees and his
hair falling over his beautiful yet tragic face. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> “Sera . . . I feel like I should apologize,
but I’m not sorry. Far from it; I’m
incredibly happy that this happened.
You have no idea how many times-“

“Severus . . . “ I cut him off. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I couldn’t bear to style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> hear him speak about this
woman. It would have broken my
heart. “I need you to tell me about
the Order of the Phoenix.”

He’s stunned into silence.
He gapped at me for a few seconds.
My face wouldn’t betray my inner turmoil and my overwhelming desire to
know this girl’s part in it all.

“All right. What
would you like me to tell you?”

“I need you tell about my last mission. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I don’t remember it at all.”

His fingers pointed and rested on each other, creating a
bridge between his forehead and his hands.
It was a deeply reflective pose and I wasn’t sure if he’d speak. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> However, his honor wouldn’t allow him to
remain silent.

“It was a reconnaissance mission. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> You were sent into the last Death Eater
meeting for the express purpose of finding out who
the next crop of Death Eaters would be.
I was there for it. Lucius had
you stand in the center of the circle in you underwear. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> You looked so proud standing there, as if
the gazes of so many men on your body didn’t bother you. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I don’t know how you could stand it.”

My body stiffened.
Lucius was much more of a cunning, manipulative bastard than I could
have ever imagined. “Why exactly was I
standing half naked surrounded by Death Eaters?”

“Perhaps this would be easier with a Pensieve.” style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> He rose and retrieved a familiar bowl from a
cupboard by his desk. He motioned me
over and drew the thin line of thought from his mind. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I watched it drift into the silvery liquid
with a worried frown.

The last edge of the memory fell into the rest of the collection
and Severus touched the liquid with the tip of his wand. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Giving me one small, tight smile, we both
leaned forward and were transported to another time.

It was as bad as I imagined it might be. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> There were a plethora of young and eager
faces around this circle. I recognized
a few of the faces. They’d been
standing outside of my door when I’d opened it that morning. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I shivered, unconsciously. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Sometimes the lack of decency among this
specific breed of wizard was enough to disgust me. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I felt warm hands on my shoulders and
looked back to Severus. He gave me
another small smile as Lucius spoke.

“You all know my daughter.
She’s in her last year at Hogwarts.
As soon as she can, she’ll
be receiving the Mark.” Many of the
room’s occupants smiled, shifting almost excitedly from foot to foot. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I’m sure they knew that their Lord would
return to them shortly.

“When she does leave school, she’ll be of the marrying
age. I will give you all the benefit
of the doubt that you all know that’s why we’re here today. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> You’ve all been chosen to vie for her hand.”

Without another word, Lucius whispered a few words and I
was suddenly naked. The grip on my
shoulders tightened. I looked at the
face of the Memory Severus. It
remained as hard as stone however I could see his fists clench in anger. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Lucius noticed this as well, however, the
grin on his face made me believe that the motions were misconstrued as
desire. I could only hope.

Many of the men took a few steps forward, coming in for a
closer examination. Seraphim’s head
remained high. She seemed unaffected
by this attention. Her gaze scanned
the group, smiling slightly when it lit upon Severus. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Lucius noticed this as well.

I felt the hands leave my shoulders and the memory started
to fade. I started to return to the
present time and to Severus’s study.
He was looking at me, staring intently really, trying to discern my
reaction.

I felt very cold, even in the blanket I’d pulled tighter
around my body. I crossed to the fire,
muttering a quite ignition spell when I arrived. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> The cheerful fire did nothing to make my
mind feel more at ease. Seraphim
Malfoy was a noble spy, that’s for sure, to endure that kind of
humiliation. Perhaps she’d gotten in
over her head.

“I don’t know if I could do that again. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Watching it all, I just felt as though I
wanted to kill them all, especially Lucius.”

“Do you realize what you’re saying Seraphim?” style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> He walked to me, taking hold of my shoulder
again, roughly this time however. He
turned me around bodily. “You’re
father will kill you if you do what you’re thinking. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> He is not a forgiving man. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> You know this.”

“Yes, Severus, I know.
However, this is not a price I’m willing to pay. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Some of those boys were outside my door
this morning, with the rest of the Seraphim Fan Club. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> They didn’t seem affected. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> There’s no decency in the whole bunch. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I won’t be a spy again.”

He let go of me suddenly, turning away in anger. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Maybe he understood the ramifications of my
proposed actions. I would be free of
this horrible life style, yet I would be a forbidden creature to him. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> We would literally be ripped apart so soon
after we’d ‘found’ each other. I tried
to remember that we’d be together again.
So I hoped.

“What you’re thinking is madness. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Absolute madness. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> We need you Seraphim. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> You can not leave the service of the Dark
Lord!” His voice was a practical roar
now. Behind me, the heat increased,
almost as if his very anger made the flames jump higher.

“There is no Dark Lord.
He’s a figment of imagination to a bunch of disillusioned fools!”

“Well, hello dear daughter. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Severus.”

For one split second, I imagined that the voice of Lucius
Malfoy did not just come from the fire at my back. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I dismissed it as an overactive thought
process. The look on Severus’s face
was anything but reassuring as the form of my normal\'>father brushed against my back.
His hands rose, and came to rest at the base of my neck, so close to
circling the column.

“I’m so glad you left your fire open Severus. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I have some very urgent news for you.” style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> The fingers tightened ever so
slightly. It was fractionally harder
to breath as Lucius seemed to burn a brand onto my skin. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> “It seems as though we have a spy among
us. Trenades was just arrested at work
on suspicion of Death Eater activity.”

Lucius leaned close to my ear. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> “Trenades was just promoted. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Did you know that Seraphim? style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Of course you did. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> You were there.”

My eyes must have been the size of eggs. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> The fingers tightened a little more. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I was practically panting to get enough air
into my lungs now. Severus looked on,
seemingly unaffected.

“Do you have any idea who this spy could be Severus? style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> It must be someone very close to those at
the top of the chain among our group.
Perhaps a son . . . or a daughter.”
The grip became fatal now. I
clawed frantically at the hands around my throat, choking my air supply. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> My eye sight was slowly blackening under
the onslaught.

“Lucius, I was just about to fire call you. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> I must tell you something.”

The tone in his voice gave him away. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> He was crumbling inside. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> He wanted this pain to stop for me. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> He was going to give his life away for
mine. A panic deeper than any I’ve
known before gripped me. With all of
my strength, I planted an elbow in Lucius’s stomach. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> The man stumbled backwards, letting
go. I gasped and fell to the floor.

As my father fought to catch his own breath I looked
straight into Severus’s eyes. The look
was pleading, begging. Telling him to
let me take the heat on this one. He
shook slightly. I responded with a savage
shake of my own.

“You’re right father.”
The voice was harsh and rasping.
“I’m your spy. I’ve been
feeding information to Dumbledore for months now. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> He knows everything that I do. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> He knows all about your style=\'mso-bidi-font-style:normal\'>plans for the Dark Lord’s return,
right down to the very last detail.
And he’ll stop you.”

“CRUCIO!”

The pain was blinding.
One second, I was catching my breath and wheezing out my death
sentence. The next, I couldn’t
think. Couldn’t move. style=\'mso-spacerun:yes\'> Couldn’t look at Severus and tell him that
I loved him.

And then, there was darkness.