Choices Not Made

By the Har Harry settled in the Library he had Justin, Aaron and Orion with him. He noticed that Orion was exceptionally quiet compared to the rest of his siblings. The boy hadn’t said two words to Harry the whole time. He wondered whethhe bhe boy felt he had little to offer compared to the rest of his talkative siblings.

It was rather amazing to think that Orion was born less than a year after the last date that Harry remembered. He had a kid at 17. He was way too young to be thinking about kids. He hadn’t even finished his schooling at Hogwarts. He didn’t remember once in the last 6 years hearing that a student was pregnant. It must have been humiliating, to be a 7th year boy knocked up by his own professor. The papers must have had a field day with that one.

He didn’t even like Snape. He supposed that Snape had some good qualities. He was a spy and had saved Harry’s life on a number of occasions. But he certainly was never nice about it. He wasn’t nice to him even now and they were trapped in the future and only the two of them knew about it. That kind of thing was supposed to bring people closer.

He simply didn’t like Snape enough to consider having him as a friend, never mind anything more. That and Harry certainly didn't consider him in any way attractive, especially now when he was... what, 48 or so? He was less pale than he used to be, but he haso gso gained a good deal of weight. He was bordering on what might be called fat -- not huge, just mostly pudgy, and startio sao sag. He still had that horrendous nose. Too add to it his formerly black greasy hair was now grizzled. Harry now thoroughly disgusted by the image in his head tried to imagine kissing it. He gagged, which was horribly embarrassing as Aaron and Justin turned to look him and he had to fight not to look too embarrassed.

Thankfully, the very man he didn’tticuticularly want to see (and definitely didn’t want to kiss) saved him. Snape kly kly walked in carrying a rather unhappy looking Helena and dumped her next to Aaron with the command to play nicely. They paid little heed to his attitude and started happily playing with Aaron’s toys, while Justin watched.

“Harry, I need to speak to you for a moment.” He walked out of the room expecting Harry to follow him.

Snape was seething when Harry joined him. “These children are all Potters, I lay claim to none of them. Except maybe Aaron and Orion, they seem unobtrusive.” He rubbed the bridge of his nose. “I will be in the Lab with Thomas, I expect no one will join us.”

“Why is he named Thomas?” Harry blurted out before Snape could run off.

The older man just stared at him. “What brings that about?”

Harry blushed and muttered. “Tom Riddle.”

“Don’t be obtuse, very few people knew the Dark Lord’s real name, especially at that time. And no supporter would think of purposely giving their child a name he hated,” he shook his head.

“So why is he named Thomas?” Harry pursued.

“I haven’t an inkling. I never asked. If you ever meet his maternalndfandfather you can ask him if he knows. He’s longwinded but he might get around to the topic of conversation at some point.” Snape inspected him for a long moment.

Harry thought back to his earlier thoughts and tried to decide whether he was even slightly attracted to the man in front of him.
Snape gave him a mild glare as if reading his thoughts. “For 27 years old, your education is severely lacking. I’ll spend the time later on working out a curriculum for you, but for now study up on household and warding charms. With these kids you’ll need to know them.” Snape glanced at the door to the Library.

“What about the kids, you’re not making them do school work?” Harry asked.

“I don’t know what I have taught them and what I haven’t. I have yet to find what I’m using as a classroom or their curriculum. Never mind that I have work on Monday and I’m ten years behind on Potions advancements.” He raised the intensity of his glare. “Stop feeling sorry for yourself and do something constructive.” He turned quickly and started down the hall at the end he turned back, “The Nanny has both sets of twins and Cassie.”

Harry couldn’t understand what had induced him to marry that man. Beyond the fact that he wasn’t even mildly attracted to him, the man was positively insufferable. This brought to mind a question, if he couldn’t find a way back would he be forced to stay married to him? Would he be able to spend of the rest of his life like this?

He went back in the Library and flopped down on a couch.

“Dada?” He felt someone tugging at his robes. Lifting his head he saw Helena attempting to climb on to his lap.

“Hi, little girl.” He said picking her up and seating her on his lap facing him. She smiled brightly at him. “Peek-a-boo” She said covering her eyes with her hands.

He smiled and removed her hands. “Peek-a-boo,” he commented before kissing the tip of her nose. Her eyes shined brightly at him as she giggled.

Looking into the face of the little girl he noticed. “You have my nose. But Snape’s eyes.”

“Papa.” She corrected.

“Yes, Papa. Papa’s ears, eyes, and fingers. But Daddy’s chin. You’ve got both of us. Papa’s not very attractive is he? But you, you’re adorable and you’ve got quite a bit of him in you.” He sighed and noticed Orion and Aaron watching him with guarded eyes. He had seen Snape watching him with that look many times. It always made him feel like an insect. Coming from the eyes of four and nine year olds, it was horrifying.

He would never have done any of this, but he couldn’t panic, he couldn’t scream and yell. He just couldn’t do that; not to them. Not to these kids he didn’t even know, but who seemed to love him and think he was their Daddy. Then of course they also thought he was happily married to a man he disliked. He didn’t want to imagine how hurt they would be if he left Snape.

He covered his eyes. Opening them he said, “peek-a-boo.” Helena and Justin laughed.


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No I haven't given up on this story. It just comes a bit slower than I anticipated, that and I've been doing other things.