What Is and What Should Never Be

What Is and What Should Never Be

Author: Prongs

Disclaimer: JK Rowling owns all things 'Harry Potter.'  ZEPPELIN owns the song 'What Is and What Should Never Be' (LZ II) and the song 'I'm Gonna Crawl' (In Through the Out Door).

Chapter Eight: I'm Gonna Crawl

……………………….

Severus sighed.  He was finally alone, and now he wanted to make sure he actually had the right book.  He sat down on his bed and leaned against the wall with the book in his hand.  Slowly, he opened it and starting reading the contents.  He gasped out in surprise when he realized what he was reading…

…………..

"What did you just say, Mr. Black?" Professor McGonagall asked worriedly.

"You heard me!" Sirius exclaimed.

James tightly held Sirius' hand in his own and glared at his professor.  "Can you please somehow get it back?  Please?"

"Mr. Black, why didn't you tell us this was going on?  You should have told either the Headmaster or myself.  You know very well that we can't possibly help you if you don't-"

James let go of Sirius' hand and stepped up within inches of McGonagall.  "How dare you speak to him like that?  You act as if he did something wrong, which he DID NOT!  How can you even think of talking to him that way?  You're making everything worse!  Just get out!"

"Mr. Potter, you can be expelled for speaking to a professor in such a manner!"

"I don't FUCKING give a damn!  GET OUT!" James roared as he opened the door.  

Professor McGonagall left the room and headed straight for Dumbledore's office.  Meanwhile, Sirius collapsed on the bed and buried his face his hands.

"I'm far more trouble than I'm worth," he whispered when he felt James sit next to him.

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard," James replied quietly as he rubbed Sirius' back.  "I love you, Sirius."

Sirius snorted.  "I've made a complete and fucking mess of everything, James.  I can't seem to do anything right."

"That's not true, and you know it," James said.  

"James," Sirius said, lifting his head.  "What if she expels you?"

"She won't," James replied.  "She had no right to say those things to you."

"Maybe she was right."

"Bull shit."

"You sound like me," Sirius said, almost smiling.

"That's a compliment," James replied.  "Look, Siri.  You have been through so much more than I can possibly imagine, and I know that I can't completely help you because I haven't been through any of this."  James tugged at his hair.  "That didn't make sense."

"I think it did," Sirius said tiredly.

"Really?  Well then, what I'm trying to say is I really do love you so much more than you can imagine, and I know that we're off to a rough start, but I want you to know that I will do everything and anything in my power to help you feel better."

"Thank you," Sirius said as he allowed James to embrace him tightly.  "Need to get my diary back before the whole world knows."

James nodded his head and bit his lip.  "We'll get it back."

………………….

Severus slammed the black book shut and threw it down on his bed.  He stood up and angrily kicked the side of his bed.  

"Fuck," Severus muttered.  "Fucking hell.  I can't believe Black and I have so much in common."  

He picked up the book again and hid it in his robes.  Then, he quickly exited his room, glaring at anyone who dared to cross his path.

………………..

The following morning, James awoke to find a large owl staring down at him.  James groaned and carefully reached for his glasses.  He then grabbed the piece of parchment from the owl without waking Sirius and quietly opened it.  

…

Potter,

Meet me by the lake tonight at eleven if you want Black's book back.  If you don't show up, I'll make sure the contents of the book become public knowledge.  

Don't bring Black with you.

S. Snape

…

James re-read the letter several times before letting it fall from his fingers.  The owl hooted several times and then flew away.

"James?  Was there an owl in here?" Sirius asked quietly.

"Umm, yes."

"Well?  Why?  What was it?"

Sighing, James handed Sirius the letter.  Sirius quickly scanned it and then stared at James.  " FUCK!"  Sirius shuddered at the thought of Snape reading his diary.  He calmed down slightly when he felt James' hand on his shoulder.  "Do you trust him?" Sirius asked nervously.

"I don't know," James replied shakily.  "I have to go, though.  Gods, I can't believe this."

"I'll go with you," Sirius said, sitting up.

"No way, Siri.  He doesn't want you there!  What if you go and then he changes his mind about everything?"

"Fine," Sirius mumbled.  "Gods, I can't believe he knows…what a fucking mess!"

James took the letter from Sirius' hands and put it on the bedside table.  Then, he gently pressed his lips against Sirius'.  After a f kif kiss, both pulled away and just looked at each other.  

"I'll find out what he wants, and I promise you, he will not tell anyone else about this," James said in a voice that was not to be argued with.

Sighing, Sirius just nodded his head and hugged James again…

TBC