Control

AN: Third day, third update- yeah me! No seriously, this is a longer chapter and I promise you there will be serious smut in the next one.

Unneeded: Are you stalking me? Thanks for sticking around and commenting- I truly appreciate that.

SinfulMind: I feel you dear- it takes a bit of will to finish a story to the end. Maybe you could start with a one shot? Actually I have already written two third of the story- I won't publish anything until I feel pretty confident that I can complete it.

Cody_Thomas: Could it be that you like sub/dom fics? *grins*

Misery


The next weeks passed in no time at all with Harry spending time with Ron and Hermione who were setting up their first apartment together. However he began to feel like the figurative fifth wheel, with them using every opportunity to cuddle and smooch. Remus had been right, Sirius did calm down and even if he could not understand Harry's decision, he grudgingly accepted it and they spent a little time together.


Once at his best friend's apartment Harry had met Ginny and it had not been quite as awkward as he anticipated and they talked extensively about her quidditch training- obviously she was determined to try out for the Edinburgh Chaser in early fall. The young wizard could not help wonder, if maybe not marrying him had given Ginny the opportunity to live her dream.

May came and went and at the beginning of June were the application deadlines to apply for a place in auror training. Ron had used the first opportunity to apply and so far Harry could not bring himself to do it. He was no longer sure if he really wanted to work in a job that felt like his fight against Voldemort had for so many years.

Since there were no more order meetings or school to attend he did not see Dumbledore or Snape for the next four weeks. It was a Tuesday precisely four weeks after his first- well he did not know what he was supposed to call it.

Sprawled on the couch he stared against the ceiling for hours trying to find the courage to use the floo to make arrangements for his second night with Snape.

Sirus and Remus were on vacation to Paris for the week and he had Grimauld Place to himself which meant he had stopped to shave or even dress properly, he mostly wore his pyjamas.


Hearing his stomach grumble he considered if he should get up and get himself something to eat but he dismissed it.

He slept badly but it were no longer dreams about Voldemort that made him afraid to close his eyes- his dreams were vague and even so they did not scare him, some made him uneasy. And that were not the ones where Snape fucked him.

In the last days he had began to feel restless, his stomach mostly upset which meant he had lost a couple of pounds. Sirius would give him hell when he returned next week and saw the condition his godson was in. In that moment the fireplace flared to life and Snape's head appeared in the green flames.

“Potter, are you there?” He sounded his usual icy self and Potter just raised his hand over the backrest of the sofa because he was faced away from the fireplace.

“I'm here,” he muttered not bothering to raise himself from his resting place.

Snape looked annoyed at that. “Could you do me the courtesy to show yourself when I am talking with you. You have horrid manners Potter which do not suit you.”

Sighing Harry sat up and stared at Snape. “What do you want?”

“It has been four weeks Potter,” Snape said without any emotion

Snorting Harry ran his fingers through his unruly hair. “Really? My my, it feels like it was yesterday.”

“Sarcasm does not suit you as well,” Snape spat obviously already in a sour mood. “You can come over, Draco is in the ministry filing out some papers.”

“Wonderful,” Harry muttered and when Snape was gone from the flames he stepped through to stumble out of the fireplace in Snape's living room.

The potion master was nowhere to be seen and so Harry leaned against the sofa waiting for him to return. When he did Snape was already wearing a silky bathrobe and without sparing the boy more than a cursory glance he motioned for him to follow him into the bedroom.

“Change into the robe and get into bed,” he said from the bathroom where he washed his hands. Not wanting to argue with him Harry quickly undressed, put on the second bathrobe and sat down on the silken sheets.

When Snape returned a little while later he took in Harry's frail body on the bed frowning deeply.

“What happened with you Potter? Can the mut not feed your properly or why do you look like an anorexic adolescent?”

Harry huffed. “I have no idea what you mean?”

Snape walked over and placed his wand on the nigthtable. “If you want to be difficult Potter, fine- let's get it over and done then.”

Suddenly angry Harry stiffly laid down on the bed and stared at the creamy canopy his green eyes blazing with fury. He waited for Snape to move, to do what he had done the last time and was surprised when he felt the bed move next to him and Snape sighed.

“You should have come to see me when you started to lose your appetite.”

Harry chuckled bitterly. “Oh and disturb your little thing with Malfoy- no thanks.”

“He is only staying here until he finds his own place to live.”

“Yeah sure.”


~~~~~~~


“Yeah sure.”

Severus found it hard to follow the boy into the depth of his mind- he was sure all of it made sense somewhere in the boy's brain but some part of him could not understand where Harry's jealousy came from.

The boy had been skinny since he stepped into the great hall in his his first year but he looked nearly emaciated now from what he could see. From a gap in the robe he could make out his protruding hip bones.

Deciding against baiting the boy into an argument he rested himself against one of the posters and attempted to find out what was wrong with Harry bloody Potter now.

“Nobody excepts you to deal with it all by yourself Potter. There are people around who would be rather glad to assist you with coping.”

Still keeping his eyes firmly on the canopy Harry could not help snorting without much humour.


“You mean everybody just wants me to deal and live their own happy lives starting their own little family.” Harry pinched his eyes shut, “Why do you care anyway? Shouldn't you be glad if I starved myself to death? No more stupid bond chaining us together.”

A flicker of anger showed in Severus' eyes but there was although amusement present .


“Do not ever think you know what I am thinking and feeling Potter. What would be the point of keeping you alive all these year and now let your own stubbornness wipe out your life.”

“Was that a joke?” Harry asked staring at his teacher incredulously.

For a moment the ghost of a smile played around the potion master's lips. “And if it was?”

Rolling his eyes Harry settled more comfortably into the sheets and his body relaxed. “You are not like I expected you to be,” he mumbled more to himself.

Severus cocked one of his brows. “And why is that?”

“I always thought you lived in a spooky manor, buried into a cauldron most of the time and eating students for dinner. But instead you have a gorgeous house at the sea and have some humour.” Harry turned on his side facing Severus who had relaxed against the foot of the bed.

“I am sorry you are disappointed Potter,” Severus said the beginning of a smile playing around his eyes. “Now, will you tell me what happened in the last weeks?”

Harry sighed but nodded. “I have trouble sleeping, I rarely eat and mostly keep my pyjamas on because I won't bother with dressing.”

“That does not sound like the bond is troubling you,” Severus replied his black eyes resting on Harry's unhappy face. “How about we get you to loosen up a bit Potter?”

Harry did not really like the smug expression on Snape's face but if it meant he would spend the night with him instead of Malfoy it was worth the risk. Mutely he nodded.