Dangerous Game

Lily crawled out of bed the next morning, everything that had happened the night before coming back into her mind. Sighing, and trying to keep the tears back, she climbed into the shower, staring at the wall, knowing James was only a few feet away. Once done she got dressed, and headed out of her room, the common room was cold, since the fire went out, and she saw James’ door was cracked open a bit. She fought the urge to run in there to him, to tell him she never meant a word, which she didn’t.

James could hardly sleep that night, he was busy staring at the wall, then the ceiling, then out the window. His alarm went off at six thirty, and instead of hitting the sleep button, he got out of bed, knowing sleep would not come, then got dressed, heading down to breakfast.

“Hey mate!” Sirius called jogging over to James.

James looked up at him, since he had been staring at the ground when he walked.

“Why so glum? I have great news!” Sirius said with a wink, and James knew it was probably another sex story.

“Lily broke up with me last night,” James said bluntly, even surprising himself. He sat down, and out of the corner of his eye he saw Sirius’ dumbfounded face.

“Why?” Sirius asked him taking a seat next to him.

“I have no idea, she said she couldn’t tell me, that it was better for the both of us,” James said playing with the eggs on his plate. He was not hungry at all.

Sirius sat silent next to his friend and saw Lily walk into the hall. She walked just on the other side of the table, and she saw her discreetly look at James, sadness written on her face. Then she glanced up and to the side, and he followed her look, it was to the Slytherin table, more importantly, at his cousin, Mulciber, Severus and his brother. Curious, Sirius did not say anything, and instead reached for some toast.

Lily sat down a few feet away from James on the other side of the table. She could see him looking at her out of the corner of her eye as she tried to watch him. She knew that she could not been seen even showing James attention, or they would do something to hurt him. Sighing, she rose from the table when she was done, and she felt as if all eyes were on her. Lily slowly walked over to the Slytherin table and took the empty seat next to Severus staring at her hands.

“Hello love,” Severus said with a smirk, his hand moving to rest on her upper thigh under the table.

“Hi,” Lily said flatly staring at the food in the middle of the table. All of Slytherin was looking at her, and she knew her friends were looking. Praying Lily dared a look, and her prayers were not answered. There was James his mouth and face forming a shocked and very hurt look. Lily bit her lip and stared at her hands again, and Severus’ very pale and cold on her leg. Cringing, she adjusted nonchalantly to get his hand off her leg, but it didn’t work, he instead slid his hand a bit under her skirt.

“I need to get to class,” Lily said reaching down to grab her books. She could not believe she was honestly going through with this, but she kept telling herself that it was to keep James safe and that was all that mattered. She hoped that this stupid infatuation Severus had with her would die down, and soon.

“I will see you after classes then,” Severus said looking up at her as she stood up.

“I have a paper to write,” Lily said trying to make up as many excuses as she could so she would not have to be around him.

“Then I will help you,” Severus said and heard people around her snicker.

Lily just nodded, and glared at Bellatrix who was sneering at her. “I’ll be in the library.”

With that, Lily left before Severus had time to get up out of his seat, like he had been doing, and exited the hall as quick as possible, not looking over at James.

“Why the hell was she with him?” James spat as he watched her leave quickly.

“I don’t know mate,” Sirius said not really paying attention to Lily leave, but rather looking over at the Slytherin table.

“They are up to no good,” he mumbled and James just merely nodded, not really paying much attention to what he was saying.

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James skipped out of Charms class early to catch Lily leaving Herbology. When he spotted her by herself he struck, walking briskly over he grabbed her arm, and to his amazement she did not resist. “Lily please talk to me,” James said pathetically as he pulled her behind a group of trees.

“I told you James,” Lily said feeling tears in her eyes as she looked at his face. She could tell he was in pain. “It is the best for both of us. I can’t be with you anymore James, I have to go,” Lily said moving to pull away from him but he caught her arm again.

“Why? Why is it better for the both of us? I thought you were happy, because quite frankly, I had never been so happy in my life, if this is better, then one of us must be crazy,” James said looking into her eyes, searching them. He knew this was not the Lily he knew.

“Because James,” Lily said knowing exactly what she needed to say, even if it killed her inside, as well as him. “I—ca—don’t love you anymore.” She had done it, she knew that this was going to be the absolute end.

James let go of her arm, staring at her, he was hurt, terribly hurt, “alright then.” He said not knowing how to respond to that. “Then I should let you go, since I make your life so miserable.” With that he moved to walk off, feeling crushed.

“Wait!” Lily said calling after him. “James it’s not—“but he did not turn around, and she just gave up. Wiping her eyes she walked out from behind the trees, and went to the library to meet Severus with a sigh.

James tromped up to his room; he needed Sirius, alcohol, and some other company to take his mind off of Lily.

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Severus was waiting for Lily in the library she was wait, and he knew exactly why. Bellatrix said that she had been talking to James so he would have to deal with that later, but now he needed to deal with Lily.

She walked around the corner to see Severus at a table, drumming his fingers impatiently. “Sorry I’m late,” Lily said taking the only chair available which was next to him, and Lily knew exactly how that had happened.

“What kept you,” Severus asked, pulling his chair closer to her so he was right next to her. He waited, knowing she was going to lie to him.

“I was talking to professor Sprout,” Lily said reaching down into her bag. She was stopped though by his cold hard hand grabbing her around the wrist. “Ow Severus,” Lily said as he pulled her arm upright so her face was only inches from his own.

“Don’t lie Lily,” Severus said glaring at her.

“I didn’t—ow let go,” Lily said suddenly very nervous and pale. She knew he knew but there was no backing out now.

“You did, you went to see Potter,” Severus said.

“No, we just ran into each other…let go!” Lily snapped pulling her arm out of his grasp, but that was a mistake. A sound of a whip cracking broke the silence of the library.

Severus was quicker then light, he had smacked her hard and fast across the face. She held the spot with the hand she just wrenched free from him, her wrist red from his grasp. Her eyes were welling up from the pain, and her cheek was hot.

“Don’t you ever lie to me,” Severus said before grabbing his book from the floor. “And don’t you ever yell at me. You are to listen to me, if you want him to survive, and for your own well being.”

Lily did not say a word, and instead grabbed out her school work, and began to scribble away at her paper. The librarian came around to see what the noise was, and Lily turned her head so she could not see the obvious hand print on her face.

Lily finished her paper in about an hour with Severus sitting over her shoulder, and his arm around her waist. His touch was cold, and she cringed when he moved to play with her hair. God she wished this was James and not him. This was only the first day, and Lily already felt dead inside.

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James was in his bedroom with Sirius, a full case of fire whiskey, and a few girls. There was music playing in the background, and James had almost downed his first bottle, as Sirius sweet talked a girl that was sitting on his lap.

Stumbling, James went over to his nightstand to look at a picture of Lily and himself that Remus had taken for them out by the lake. With a laugh, he threw it at the wall, watching the frame shatter, it was face up and he looked down at it. There they were smiling, then leaned in for a kiss. Picking it up, glass cutting his hands, he crumpled it up and threw it into the garbage. She said she did not love him, if she had fallen out of love that quickly, there was no way she loved him to begin with.

He wiped the blood off his hands onto his cloak, and turned back around the room. “James needs some loving,” he said and a petite blonde girl stepped up to him smirking. She was two years younger than him, and he did not know her name, but it did not matter to him. Taking her to his bed, he threw her down upon it, kissing her. Sirius took the cue, and him and the girl he was with left, and the other girls sulking left as well, leaving the door partially open.

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Lily returned to her room, the smack had actually bruised a bit, and her arm had a perfect handprint. Just outside the head boy and girl common room she heard something that made her stomach sink. There was heavy breathing and moaning coming from inside, when she opened the door she heard it loud and clear.

“Oh James,” she heard a high voice groan out. Lily stared at the door in disbelief, it was half open. Marching up to the door, she shut it, before running off to her room turning on music to drown out the sounds.

“W-what was that?” The girl asked, unwrapping her legs from around James waist for a second.

“Nothing,” James grunted, thrusting into her hard. “Just be quiet.” He was trying to pretend she was someone else, being Lily of course and with her talking it did not help.

The girl complied, putting her legs back around him, before digging her nails deep into his back, knowing that it would leave a mark.

“How could he do this?” Lily almost screamed in her sobs. She choked a bit, coughing for a few seconds, and then walked over to the mirror to look at her face more clearly. It was swollen and still a bit pink. “Maybe he never did truly love me. What if I was just what that girl is? Just someone to have sex with,” she said to herself taking a seat on her bed. She knew that was not true though, she had seen it in his eyes that he really loved her.

James finished with the girl about ten minutes later. He pulled out of her, and then found her clothes on the floor. Tossing them at her, she gave him a dirty look before beginning to get her clothes on. “So I’ll see you tomorrow?” She asked him with a smile.

“Yeah, sure,” James said before retreating to his bathroom. He just wanted to be alone now; getting drunk and being with this girl had done nothing to get Lily off of his mind.

With an angry huff, the girl left the room, slamming the door behind her. Once she was gone, James took a shower, regretting what he had just done. Even in his half drunk state, he knew who had closed the door. He could hear her music blasting in the other room, and James knew she had heard. “Damn it!” He yelled slamming his fist against the wall, leaving a small dent.

“Well she said she doesn’t love me anymore, so I need to move on,” James rationalized with himself. He knew that was lie, she was lying to him, but why?

He retreated to his bed, his head already beginning to pound. Getting under the sheets, he threw the girls sock that she left behind in the trash, before rolling over to sleep.