Abby's Side

On Monday morning, Abby and Sirius dropped their bags off at Sirius’ flat and went to training. Abby was in the middle of a practice duel with her squad leader, Larissa, when a far-off alarm sounded.
“Oh SHIT!” Larissa yelled. “Abby, Alice, Laura, Kelsey, Cayce, and Lily—go meet up with the other squad upstairs—NOW!”
The group of girls called out raced upstairs and was greeted by Sirius, James, Frank, and Jordan. Sirius pulled Abby into a quick embrace and spoke quietly to her. “Hey. You ready?” Abby swallowed and nodded, getting a brief, reassuring smile in return. Sirius then addressed the entire group. “Okay, if you can possibly believe this, Lucius Malfoy is in charge of this one. So… we could have some fun with this.” A dark murmur rippled through the young trainees as well as the handful of qualified Aurors. “Let’s go.”
The group returned to Headquarters much later dirty, sweaty, and wet from a torrential mid-April downpour. Abby collapsed, almost literally, on the floor between James and Sirius. The trainees had managed to haul in Sirius’ cousins Bellatrix and Narcissa, as well as Lucius and Rodolphus Lestrange. The rest of the Death Eaters had evaded capture.
“Well done,” their Head said above them. Each girl accepted his help and clambered to her feet; Sirius got up at almost the exact same time as Abby weaved on her feet. He wrapped his arms around her waist and steadied her as wave after wave of pain emanated from her and dizzied him.
“Stay tough,” Sirius whispered as Abby squeezed her eyes shut. Abby gave an almost imperceptible nod and rested her hands on his. Alex was speaking again and Sirius slid his hands to Abby’s temples as she leaned on him and forced her eyes open.
“You were all top of your Squads already but tonight you have risen above some fully qualified Aurors. We are fast-tracking you on the accelerated program, cutting what should be a 2-year program into mere months. By October you should all be fully qualified Aurors.”

Indeed, the following October the combined squads became fully qualified. Abby spent the entire Friday doing deskwork, escaping 2 hours after she would’ve liked. She Apparated straight onto the sidewalk outside their Godric’s Hollow home, hoping Sirius would be there to greet her in the downpour. Abby was not disappointed; Sirius opened the door and had pressed his mouth to hers before it had completely shut.
“I know what tomorrow is,” he said quietly.
“Hmm… Saturday? I don’t know, Siri, tell me please!” Abby’s eyes sparkled with the same mischief as Sirius’ as they grinned at each other.
“It’s Halloween. I’ve always liked Halloween, Abby.”
Abby sucked in a breath. Halloween was the day they had first truly made love. It was the day he had decided he loved her. It had many meanings to the young couple… not to mention it was their 6-month anniversary. “Me too, Siri. Whatever are we going to do?”
“Well… as soon as I’m allowed to steal you away upstairs, m’lady, I’ve got a couple surprises for you.” Abby smiled trustingly up at him and let him pull her into his arms. He carried her upstairs and let her down just as he opened the door to their lavish bedroom.
“Strawberries!” she gasped, looking around the room. “And- oh, SIRIUS, is that…?” She collapsed against him, willing herself not to cry. He had found out how to make the fruit dip her mother had made when she and James were growing up, and with her emotions already bubbling over out of both love for Sirius and frustration with her lack of excitement at the Ministry, it was the last blow.
“I’m sorry, Abby, I thought-“ his choked voice startled her, and she realized just how much his emotions were at the surface as well. That was the final straw; she collapsed into his arms and began crying. He cried for a while as well, feeling the strong emotions rolling off of her again. Finally, she stopped, and looked up at him.
“Strangely, I feel better. Can we eat our snack?”
Sirius smiled down at her. He had cried much less than her, even though his emotions were just as strong, putting her need to be comforted above his need to cry. “I was wondering if you were hungry. Did you get to eat anything for dinner?”
Abby nodded. “But that was at… 4:30? Something like that. So I’m really hungry!!” She dramatically jumped onto their enormous, soft, scarlet-and-gold covers after kicking off her shoes. Sirius joined her, and they took turns sloppily feeding each other strawberries, grapes, apples, and pears dipped in the sweet, creamy fruit dip.
The couple made a mess of things, but immensely enjoyed the experience. Sirius slid up behind Abby and gently pushed her long hair over one of her shoulders. After pressing a soft sigh of a kiss to her neck, he rested his chin on her shoulder. “Six months. Abby… out there… it’s so dark, so bleak, people are giving up. But me and you… we aren’t. I love you, baby.”
She snuggled onto his lap, then turned around. “If words could tell you how much I love you… but they can’t. Siri…” she trailed off, waiting to lock her eyes with his.
“What is it, Abby?” he probed softly, gently pushing her shirt over her head.
“Siri, I quit taking the potion… I…”
Sirius stopped, his hands on her waist. His expression was unreadable, and Abby began to wonder just what he was thinking. “Me too, baby. I’m ready. We have to be, don’t we…” He gently laid her back on the bed and slowly, luxuriously the two undressed each other. Sirius leaned over her and pressed soft, tantalizing kisses to her neck, collarbone, ribs, and waist. “Tonight is about you, Abby. You are my life.”
His body rippled with muscle, and Abby slowly reached out and pressed one hand to his chest, over his heart. “You’re mine, too, Siri.”
The two slipped into a slow passion, and it was much later when Sirius finally rolled onto his side next to her. She drew lazy patterns on his chest, and just before they fell asleep and the candles went out, they snuggled up under the covers, feeling more secure in each other’s arms than ever before.

Three weeks later, Sirius found it nearly impossible to get Abby out of bed. “Abby?” Sirius called after his (rare) solo shower, walking back into their room with just a towel wrapped around his waist. She was curled in a tight, miserable ball, and he dressed quickly before rousing her. Abby mumbled something incoherent about not feeling well into the pillows.
“Abby, are you sure it’s not--?”
Then she knew. She threw up as soon as she sat up, but instantly felt better. She stared at him, then fled to the bathroom for the test. After waiting for 15 minutes, the small vial of potion turned pink.
Abby squealed and flung herself into Sirius’ waiting arms. “I am!” she said breathlessly. “Siri, I’m pregnant!”
He grinned down at her expression. “I guess you’ll be stuck doing deskwork for quite awhile. Do you think you can handle that?”
“I think I can, for this. I may be bored out of my mind but I’m sure you’ll find ways to amuse me.”
The two Flooed to the Ministry, and Sirius gave her a quick kiss when they reached the Head’s door. “I’ll see you later,” he whispered. “I’m sorry I can’t be there with you baby but I’ll be there every other time I can.”
“I know,” she said softly. She took a deep breath, knocked, and was told to enter. When she did so, Alex looked up and smiled at her.
“Have a seat! How may I help you, Abby?”
“Well… um.” She swallowed carefully. “I can’t do field work for… awhile.”
Alex suddenly smiled even more widely. “Let me guess… are you pregnant?” When Abby looked surprised, he laughed. “Alice and Lily are pregnant. Either you three friends have planned this or there’s something in the water.”
Abby laughed as well. “Or we just all three think Halloween—“ Alex held his hand up and was laughing harder.
“Okay, Abby, I really don’t want to know what you and Sirius get up to on Halloween. There’s really not much deskwork going around right now, so just let me know when your checkups are. I’ll let both you and Sirius go, I know he wants to be there with you if he can.”
“Thanks,” Abby breathed, turning at once to track down Sirius and tell him.
When told about the news at lunch, her exhausted husband seemed rejuvenated. “That’s exactly the pick-me-up I needed, Abby. When are you going to the Healers?”
Abby bit her lip. “This afternoon. Baby, please, for this one stay here. They need you.”
Sirius smiled softly and kissed her forehead. “I know, Abby. Keep me updated on when you go and when… well… if there’s not too many callouts or potential callouts I’ll go.”
“I love you,” Abby whispered. She had felt compelled to say it much more frequently than usual lately, and could attribute it only to the hormonal changes inside her and the ever-darkening world they lived in.
“I love you, too, Abby,” he said quietly in response, watching as she left to go to St. Mungo’s. With a sigh, he heaved himself up from the table and went back to the training rooms with James.

By her April checkup, the pregnancy (though going perfectly) had begun to wear on Abby. She was exhausted, no doubt due in large part to her small build. Alex was cautiously keeping an eye on the heavily-pregnant Auror, and essentially forbade her to move about too much as she entered her last trimester. Abby was shaking from exhaustion and nerves when she went to St. Mungo’s alone; Sirius had gotten called out around lunch and hadn’t yet returned.
The Healer who had been keeping an eye on Abby’s charts smiled reassuringly at the end of the checkup. “Everything is great, Abby. It’s clear you’ve been eating well, resting, and pretty much letting Sirius dote on you. But since you are so small, this pregnancy is beginning to wear you down physically. I’m putting you on homebound until the baby is born, and quite possibly after your June checkup on bedrest. Your due date is July 28th… do you want to know if it’s a girl or boy?”
Abby bit her lip, seriously tempted by the offer. “No. And don’t let Sirius know either!”
The Healer laughed. “Of course not. Have you two made a list of names yet?”
“No,” Abby sighed. “We haven’t had time, we’ve been so busy lately. I’ll probably let him pick the day the baby is born.”
Sirius met her in the hospital’s lobby, and they took the Knight Bus home. As they sat at the table eating, Sirius brought up the checkup. “How did it go?” he asked as she downed yet another enormous glass of ice water.
“It was good. They put me on homebound though,” Abby replied, watching him as he got up to get more water for her. “I found out my final due date, it’s July 28th. Which, now I think about it, is really close to Lily’s—even closer than Alice’s.”
“Really?” he asked, surprised, as he sat back down.
“Yeah… three days apart. Won’t that be amazing, to have them be neighbors, cousins—almost twins?”
A few minutes later, Sirius got up and took her plate and class. He kissed her nose as he did so. “And I’m still allowed to spoil my gorgeous Abby, right?”
“Of course you are,” she replied, smiling.

By late July, Abby, Lily, Alice, Sirius, James, Remus, and Frank had become seriously entrenched with the Order of the Phoenix, attempting ferociously to stop Voldemort. Alex, who was also a member, gave the entire group of Aurors orders to stay home and stay safe, but Sirius, James, and Remus were as reckless as ever. They frequently did Dumbledore’s more heinous tasks, and on the 26th had been away for nearly three days on one such mission.
Lily and Abby were upstairs in the nursery-to-be, with Abby reading the book Sirius had gotten her not long ago. The book focused on the ever-roaring debate about whether or not to breastfeed children, and Abby was forcefully on the side of breastfeeding her child.
A sudden, sharp pain coursed through her entire being, and she gasped. Lily looked up curiously, but Abby was still deeply into her book. Minutes later, a much sharper pain in her abdomen made her drop the book. “Abby?!” Lily gasped, handing her friend a glass of ice water.
Just as she was panicking about what to do without Sirius, the front door opened and closed. “Abby? Lily?” Sirius called.
“We’re in the nursery!” Lily called, unable to keep the strain of panic out of her voice. “Sirius, quick-!”
Lily’s tone shook the exhaustion out of Sirius and he hurtled upstairs as James and Remus trudged into the house as well. Sirius dropped to his knees in front of Abby, whose hands were now on her stomach. “Abby… are you okay?” he asked, placing his hands over hers.
“No,” she gasped. “Siri, this baby’s coming and it’s coming now, no matter what!” She took the emergency portkey she’d been given, Sirius held it out, and counted under his breath. When they slammed into solid ground, he steadied her before releasing her into the Healers’ care.
James, Lily, Remus, and (much to his shock) Sirius’ cousin Andromeda showed up. Andromeda was with her husband, Teddy, whom Sirius had been acquainted with briefly before. They had their 9-year-old Metamorphagus daughter Nymphadora with them, and the child’s expression lit up.
“Uncle Sirius!” she cried, grinning. He hugged her and let her momentarily latch onto his arm before shaking free. Andromeda, Teddy, and Dora weren’t there long, but their visit brightened and fortified Sirius.
“Thought you needed that,” James said under his breath. Sirius was exhausted, and before anyone could say anymore, he had fallen asleep right there in the waiting room.
Finally, at around 3 the morning of the 28th, a gentle hand shook Sirius awake. He started awake to see a Healer smiling at him. “You can come see them now,” she said softly. Lily was asleep, James looked asleep, and Remus had disappeared.
He slowly trudged into Abby’s room, and saw Abby in a deep, peaceful sleep. Sirius settled into a chair, rested his head on the bed, and watched her. The expression on her face was so secure and relaxed that he could not bear to look away. When she woke early on the morning of the 29th, he was resting his chin on the sheets, gazing at her sleepily.
She laughed softly. “Don’t you ever sleep?” she asked, stroking his thick, silky hair.
“Not since yesterday,” he replied, closing his eyes under Abby’s touch. He suddenly yawned and sat up. “We need to pick a name,” he said quietly, kissing her forehead.
“Girl?” Abby asked hopefully; Sirius laughed a bit and nodded. Both had been hoping for a girl, though Sirius did so secretly. He had given everyone the impression of indifference, claiming boldly that girl or boy the child would play Quidditch and be an exceedingly popular and talented young person.
“A beautiful one, Abby.” He got quiet for awhile, thinking deeply. Finally, an appropriate name came to him. “Ariana.”
Abby considered this for a moment and then nodded. “I like it, Siri. And her middle name should be Cassandra, like mine. Then she’ll have influence from both of us.”
Sirius smiled. “I bet she’ll have more of both of us than we realize,” he said softly, kissing Abby gently.

Five months later, Abby couldn’t stay on her feet long. Several things were wearing her down, but the one she was most acutely aware of was Ariana—or Ari, as they had decided to nickname her. The child was boisterous and had lungs of steel; she wailed into the morning hours no matter what, threw her food, and simply refused to behave. Upon talking to both Alice and Lily, Abby found that only Lily’s little boy, Harry, did this as well. Supposedly the boisterous children could be very early signs of powerful magic, and Abby even heard that she and James had been very rambunctious and stubborn as well.
She had collapsed on the stairs in tears when the doorbell rang one night after Ari flung her food across the kitchen with amazing force. Abby was still breastfeeding, but attempting to alternate in soft foods. Ari was having none of it. Abby struggled to her feet, and somehow made it to the door. Sirius and Remus were already outside; they walked in (Sirius kissed Abby’s forehead as he passed) with James on their heels. Lily was walking up the path behind them with a softly cooing Harry.
“How,” Abby said hoarsely as she shut the door, “did you do that?”
Lily settled Harry down in the playpen in the little-used dining room and pulled Abby into the kitchen. Using simple, short spurts of silly magic, the girls entranced and calmed Ari, who soon began insisting on chasing the spoons through the air with her tiny arms. After putting Ari in the pen with Harry (they frequently babbled to each other happily in baby-talk), the two cleaned up the kitchen and moved the children and the pen into the living room. “What about baths?” Abby asked, walking back into the kitchen for a couple glasses of sparkling (non alcoholic) juice for them both.
“We’ll be here for awhile,” Lily said quietly. “Your brother, Sirius, and Remus are refusing to rest. Actually, from what I’ve gathered, this work on defensive spells is going so well that Dumbledore has seen fit to tell them to drop everything else for the Order and do this.”
Abby had just set her glass down when it happened. She collapsed onto the couch as her stomach dropped and her head spun. Colors and shapes whirled by in blurs, and it was all Abby could do not to get sick. She felt something cold pressing against her face, and finally forced one eye open. Sirius was kneeling beside the couch, holding an icy cloth to her sweat-streaked face. She smiled weakly and rolled all the way onto her back as Sirius massaged her temples. James and Remus stood watching, astonished.
“I still don’t understand all of this,” James said quietly. “And I’m related to her!”
“Give me a minute,” Sirius said quietly, gently settling Ari in with Abby. When Abby and Ari were comfortable, the group moved to the kitchen.
“She told me a long time ago to tell you if the need arose, and I sure as hell think the need has arisen. James, those feelings you get around Death Eaters? She gets that—just a lot more intensely. Whereas you feel weak and just drained, she physically gets sick. I’m honestly not sure why, and neither is she, but this is her worst attack in awhile.”
“Who has she been around?”
“No one that’s a known Death Eater,” Sirius said quietly, looking down at the scarred table. “I think it’s just the suppressing darkness. James, this war is literally killing her. The only thing we know to help her is me—that’s why, even at school, she was essentially attached to me—I prevented these attacks as well as healing her after them.”
As everyone tried to process this information, a knock at the door informed them of Dumbledore’s arrival. Abby was sitting up when Sirius sat down and pulled her into his lap. Remus looked away, Lily looked after Harry, and James got the door; Sirius got in a few seconds’ serious kisses before Dumbledore and James came in. The Order leader and Hogwarts headmaster was looking uncharacteristically grave as snow began to fall in huge amounts. With a sudden jolt, Sirius realized it was Christmas Eve.
“Lily, James, Sirius, Abby… it has just come to light that the danger in this house is not on you yourselves… but on Ariana and Harry.” When the couples exchanged startled, scared glances, he cleared his throat and continued. “There has been a prophecy made, and it concerns a child born at the end of July. Which child—Ariana, Harry, or Neville—remains to be seen. I believe, however, that it is logical, based on lineage, to believe it is one of these two children and not Neville. And based on what I know of Voldemort’s nature, I believe it more likely to be Harry than Ariana. He wouldn’t want to spill pure blood.” When Sirius made a strangled but vehement noise, Dumbledore held up one hand. “I know, Sirius, that this does not matter to you. Indeed, we cannot help who we fall in love with. But to Voldemort, this does matter. However, based on what you, Abby, and you, James, told me as soon as you had graduated from Hogwarts, there is a lineage more important that places your children in more danger.”
Abby went pale and held Ari close. “The Heirs,” she choked in a whisper. Tears had begun to form in her eyes. “But he can’t know.”
“He can suspect, much like me, Abby. James, Sirius, Remus, please keep up your excellent work on those spells. I’m giving you seven months. On Ari’s birthday, we will perform the charm.”
Sirius tucked Abby’s head beneath his chin. “Sir… would it be prudent to have… two Secret-Keepers?”
“In many situations, no, it would be counterproductive. But I think, in this case, it is the best chance we have.” Their eyes met, and Sirius understood with a sinking heart that the second Secret-Keeper would have to be either Ari or Harry. “Choose wisely,” Dumbledore said, and with that, he was gone.
“Well, that was cheerful,” Remus said from the doorway.
“Kinda what we thought,” Sirius agreed. Abby was completely listless and limp in his embrace, even at 7 at night. “Let’s go to bed,” he said quietly, helping her up. “James, Lily—that extra bedroom is cleaned up, you can stay there. Remus, that room down here still has the bed set up.” Before either of his friends could protest, he added, “I can’t even see straight, I’m so exhausted. We’ll get nowhere working blindly on those spells. All of us need to rest.” He helped Abby upstairs, put Ari to sleep for her, and waited for his gorgeous girl to come out of the bathroom.
Sirius had simply slid out of his jeans and was sprawled on the bed after setting the charms when Abby walked out of the bathroom. She was clad in just a tank top and a pair of pink underwear, and Sirius was on his feet faster than he thought possible. As he kissed her deeply, his awareness of the danger they had upon them intensified into passion. Abby felt the same, and simply needed the same reminders as Sirius that they were, for now, alive, with a happy, healthy daughter.
“You are so gorgeous,” he breathed as he slowly undressed her. “I don’t want to leave you… ever.”
“Then don’t,” she replied in a whisper-soft voice. “Go slow… make this last.”
Sirius complied, and they were both covered in a layer of sweat before either felt anywhere near the edge. He flicked his damp hair out of his face as he gritted his teeth and gripped the blankets. Abby had wrapped her small hands around his forearms, unable to feel anything but the intense pleasure and warm tingling everywhere their bodies met.
Finally, she shuddered and gasped, and for only the third time since they had been together (including at school) she cried out. Her hands slipped to his wrists, where her grip tightened. The changing feeling of her around him and near him dragged Sirius over the edge, and he held himself up shakily on his elbows.
“I love you so much,” Abby breathed, brushing his hair out of his eyes. He leaned in to kiss her, then rolled them over so Abby was resting her cheek on his still-heaving chest.
“I’m glad you do,” Sirius replied, running his fingers through her hair. “I don’t know what I’d do if you didn’t.”
“You’d gently touch my cheek,” she replied, demonstrating, “then you’d play with my hair.” She slipped her hand up to his hair and untangled bits of it. “You’d talk softly and sweetly to me. You would make me love you. And then… you’d kiss me.” By this point she had scooted up, and softly pressed her lips against his. The kiss deepened, showing Sirius’ agreement, and Abby rolled over so she was spread-eagled on top of him.
Sirius groaned in pleasure as she wriggled around. “I’m guessing you want to go again,” he said quietly. When she nodded, he deftly flipped them and began to pay attention to every single one of her sensitive spots. By the time they finished, the sky was turning pink.
“Siri?” Abby said softly. He lifted his head to look at her. “I’m going to go check on Ari. She hasn’t cried all night… that’s really strange.”
“Okay, Abby,” he said quietly, kissing her nose.
She dressed quickly, then removed the charms from the door and slipped out into the hallway. When she got to the nursery, Lily was there, as well. The redhead smiled and nodded to Ari’s crib. Ari was cooing softly to Harry, who was as usual responding in baby-speak. Abby gently lifted her daughter into her arms, and Harry immediately held out his little arms to be picked up also.
Abby settled into a chair, and Ari immediately began whimpering softly. “Lily…” she asked quietly. “Do you-?”
Lily nodded. “Sometimes. It’s supposed to help their immune systems—especially in the case of magical children.” She softly shut the door, and Abby settled into a chair with Ari comfortable against her chest.
“I didn’t know that! I never got that far in that book.”
“Madam Pomfrey told me one day. I’d heard it from my cousin and decided I needed to ask; the opinions were in firm agreement.”
Quite awhile later, the sun broke over the horizon. Abby settled Ari into her crib and fell back into the bed next to Sirius. He instantly pulled her close, reveling in the feeling of their bodies together and listening to her heartbeat calm to match his own languid rhythm.
“Was it that bad?” he asked quietly. She closed her eyes.
“No. Lily was in there too… Ari and Harry were, um, talking again. We just sat there talking for awhile.”
Sirius laughed softly, a sound Abby loved and missed dearly. With each passing moment, his laughter faded from his eyes. She knew that soon his blue-grey eyes would be simply haunted-looking, and slid even closer.
“I love your laugh, baby,” she whispered, but she never heard his soft response. She never felt him press a kiss to her neck. She had already drifted into a deep sleep.