TRYING TO REMEMBER

It was six in the morning when Lucy walked in. She had been in a few times during the night but Sirius was sleeping. This time he was awake just looking at Remus.

“You still here?”

“Good morning to you too Mr. Black. My shift ends at seven I’m just making my last rounds.”

“What time is it?”

“Six.”

“Merlin, I don’t ever think I’ve been up that early,” Sirius grinned at Remus, “not without a little help.”

Lucy blushed at this, but laughed. “Do you have any plans for today?”

“I was invited to some friend’s house before I found out about Remus. But I just feel I can’t leave him. I don’t want him to be alone.”

“Mr. Black, I don’t know your friend but in most cases the significant other would want their lives to go on. Plus you might have more to tell him when you get back.”

“Do you think he can hear me?”

“I don’t know. His brain is functioning and is alive so there is always a possibility. There have been studies saying that a people in comas can hear, it keeps them connected to the world outside. But I think it’s like a black nothingness. I know it’s hard to understand what I mean.”

“No, I understand perfectly.”

“You should spend the holiday with your friends, he’s not going to wake up until the doctors decide to wake him up.”

“I know.”

“I’ll see you tonight then?”

“It’s a date.”

“Mr. Black, Happy Christmas.”

“Happy Christmas to you and yours Lucy.”

With that she smiled and left.

Sirius made the fold out chair grow longer legs so at least he could sleep with his arm around Remus’ waist the only place where there didn’t seem to have any bandages, wires or tubes. Feeling his lover beneath him he fell asleep. He was so exhausted he didn’t hear the day nurse Katherine come in at least twice before he woke up. Sirius woke up again around eleven fifteen he stretched and realized that he was hungry. He wondered what was going on at the burrow, what Harry was doing. Suddenly a stunningly pretty nurse walked in everything was perfect not a thing out of place.

“Well hello there. Nice to see you up finally.”

“Hello there yourself. I’m Sirius Black.”

“Yes, yes all the nurses are going on and on about you. I personally don’t see what the deal is.”

“What do you mean?”

“How handsome you are, and such a loving and devoted partner you are.”

“I’m still handsome and if I didn’t have such a hard life you would have seen how handsome I was. You would be swooning all over me too,”

“Too bad I’m the wrong sex.”

“What if I told you I swing both ways.”

“I’d say you’re a fucking asshole for trying to hit on me while your ‘lover’ is in here fighting for his life.”

“I’m not hitting on you, I’m stating a fact. As a matter of fact I haven’t hit on a girl since I fell in love with Remus and we were sixteen at the time.”

“I’m sorry. It’s just that I’ve had more than my share of men hit on me while their wives or partners were in comas. I hate it.”

“Forgiven.”

“Is he one of you?”

“Excuse me?”

“C’mon Mr. Black the chairs just don’t come that tall. You’re a wizard aren’t you? Is he?”

“How do you know about wizards?”

“I lived next door to one, until she was killed a few years ago near Ten Downing.”

“When?”

“Late June, early July of ninety-six.”

“I can’t say that I heard.”

“A very stately woman. She never left her house without her green shawl.”

“So that’s what happened to Emma.”

“So is he one?”

“Yes.”

“I have to go, it was nice talking to you Mr. Black. I’m glad I was wrong about you. You are a loving and devoted mate. And quite handsome,” she winked at him. “He’s quite a lucky man.”

“If you knew him you would know that I am.”

She left. Just then a woman with mousy brown hair walked in.

“That’s a new look.”

“How is he?” It broke her heart to see Remus like this.

“Everyone is telling me he’s going to be fine. I just don’t know.”

“Come to the burrow.”

“I can’t.”

“I know you feel guilty about what happened.” Tonks went to the door and shut it. “But he brought you back for one person and one person only.”

“But Tonks look at him.”

“I know. But you have a godson that needs you. As much as Remus is going through he can’t feel the pain. Harry can. He defeated Voldemort and then he had to be there for everyone else. Me, the Weasleys and whoever lost a love one in the war. He has been there and even though we try and Merlin knows that Remus has. He needs you. Remus could see that and if he was awake he’d admonish you for not being with Harry on Christmas. It’s what he wanted was for you two to have a happy Christmas together. Leave them Hermione’s cell number they’ll call if anything changes.”

Tonks was right since Harry knew he was back, he was thrown into the middle of what was going on between Remus and himself. It was time to give a little and if Remus was awake he would throw him out of the room and lock the door so he would have no choice but go. He knows it's happened more than once. Let me stop at Grimmauld Place and make my self presentable.

“Okay we’ll see you in about an hour?”

“Tonks, how do I find out what Hermione’s cell number is?”

“I’ll let the nurses know.”

Sirius took Remus’ hand. “I’m going to spend some time with Harry for Christmas I know that’s what you would have wanted. Don’t do anything drastic while I’m gone. I love you and I’ll miss you.”

About an hour later Sirius showed up at the burrow, and all eyes looked at him. Maybe he should have stayed at the hospital.

Harry smiled at his godfather, “Happy Christmas.”

Sirius smiled back “Happy Christmas, Harry. Here.”

Harry opened his gift it was a beautiful pewter frame with an inscription. ‘Harry, you are more precious to us than we could have ever thought possible.’ In side the frame was a picture of James and Sirius looking down either side of Lily holding Harry. It was the day he was born, Remus had taken the picture.

Harry had tears in his eyes it was the most thoughtful gift he had received in his life. “Thank you, Sirius.”

“Your parents actually had the same picture in the same frame at Godric’s Hollow when they died. Remus gave it to them as a gift and inscribed the first words James said to you. He gave me a copy of the picture which I kept secretly in a box.”

“Dinner won’t be for a few hours.”

“A quick game of Quidditch, anyone?”

Hermione and her mother decided to help Molly in the kitchen. While Mr. Granger never played the game he loved watching it.

Teams were Charlie, Tonks Percy and Fred vs. Ginny, Harry, Ron and Sirius. Sirius needed a few practice runs as he had not been on a broom for awhile. After getting used to it they played and played rough. Sirius was having a blast he and Harry worked well together, just like he and James. It was really a nice diversion for everything that was happening in his life. Harry’s team won but barely and since they were all former Quidditch players of championship teams they should. After the game Sirius pulled Harry aside.

“I’m sorry I haven’t been there for you like you need me to be. I promise that once Remus is awake and on the mend, things will be different. But I’m here now and if there is anything that you want to talk about now don’t be afraid to ask. I’m always here for you Harry.”

“My parents, what finally brought them together?”

“She finally figured out that though he we, well most of us, were stupid gits, we were loyal and good friends. Not only did we accept someone who was totally prejudiced against we tried to help him too. She understood that showed more maturity more kindness than anything that we could have done. It opened the door and your father grew up enough to get in it. Though we missed the fighting it was quite amusing at times. No to say there wasn’t the occasional banter after they were together. But nothing like some of the knock out drag down fights. Poor Remus Lily was always trying to make him choose sides. And believe it or not he wouldn’t always choose ours.”

“Sirius, what if he’s an invalid?”

“Then I’ll take care of him. Today Harry is about you and me. And short of an emergency phone call from the hospital that’s the way I plan to keep it. Remus would have wanted it this way.”

There were more conversations about the marauders, how they met. Looking back were there any tip offs about Peter? Just for the first time really getting to know them. Harry couldn’t believe that James and Sirius was that close. He wondered if he and Ron were that close. It was nice to see Sirius laugh. Dinner was done a small prayer was said for Remus’ full recovery, and then they ate and ate and ate. Before too long Sirius was in front of the fireplace sleeping, Harry levitated him into one of the bedrooms upstairs. Sirius wake up a few hours later it was late almost ten o’clock, he desperately wanted to get back to the hospital and back to Remus.

“Thank you Molly for a happy Christmas.”

“Your welcome, take care of yourself and Remus too.”
He went around the room and said his good-byes went outside and apparated to the alley around the corner from the hospital. Walked in just a Lucy was coming in for her shift.

“And where are you coming from Mr. Black?”

“I took some wise advice and spent time with friends. I needed that.” Sirius looked up at the moon it was almost half waxing towards full.

Lucy noticed what he was looking at. “Moon will be full next week all the crazies come out, I wish there was just one full moon where nothing would happen.”

“So do I. C’mon let’s get in I’m here much later than I wanted to be.”

They traveled to the third floor together she to the nurses station he to Remus’ room and saw that there was no change. He leaned over and gave Remus and kiss.

“Happy Christmas, babe.”