Forsaken
folder
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
50
Views:
2,140
Reviews:
4
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
50
Views:
2,140
Reviews:
4
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Revelations of a Spy
Disclaimer: All rights belong to JKR et al. I'm just playing.
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Chapter 8 - Revelations of a Spy
Harry blinked his eyes several times, the dingy lace curtains in front of him fluttering slightly in the breeze coming through the cracked window. He sat perfectly still for a good ten minutes, processing everything from Snape’s memory and trying with all his might to connect it with the man that he knew. None of it fit. The way his mother had looked at Snape - even knowing he was a Death Eater -- was so… forgiving. It was as if she’d been friends with him for a long time.
“But she couldn’t have been?” he whispered to himself. “Could she?” He stood and ran a hand through his hair. Severus quickly recast his Disillusionment charm and nudged Kingsley’s arm. Kingsley sat bolt upright on the bed, relaxing a little as he watched Harry pace the room.
“Alright there, Harry?” asked Kingsley softly. Harry didn’t hear him, he was so lost in his thoughts. His emotions rioted within him as he paced up and down the room. His mind couldn’t even begin to wrap around the idea that Dumbledore had in any way planned to have Snape kill him. Dumbledore hadn’t even finished explaining everything. Harry had so many questions with no answers…
He clutched the front of his shirt, rubbing hard at the searing pain in his chest as his eyes welled up with tears. Why had Snape killed him? Dumbledore had given Snape lots of chances to prove himself when no one else would have trusted him at all. Snape had thrown them all away with that one curse. It didn’t make any sense. Unless -
“Harry?” asked Kingsley again. Harry ignored him, rushing back over to the pensieve. His hands shook as he put the memory of Severus’s induction back into its vial. He placed it carefully back into the box and plucked the last vial from its compartment. He rubbed a thumb over the loopy “4” and uncorked the vial, pouring it into the pensieve.
“This is the last one,” said Harry quietly. He turned to look at Kingsley. “After I’m done, you and I will need to talk.”
“I’ll go down and get the rest of your stuff while I wait,” said Kingsley. “We’ll need to be gone from here as soon as we can.” Harry nodded, and for the fourth time, entered the memory in the pensieve.
Again, he found himself in Albus’s office. Albus was sitting behind his desk, examining his burned and mutilated hand. Harry walked slowly towards him, grimacing as Albus grimaced trying to take his wand with his blackened fingers. Harry jumped at a light tapping on the door.
“Come in,” said Albus, setting his wand down on the desk. Severus walked in, carefully carrying a smoking goblet. He was dressed far more casually than Harry had ever seen him dressed - just a simple black button-down shirt tucked neatly into a pair of belted, black trousers. He handed the potion to Albus, who drank it immediately and pulled a face as he smacked his lips.
“I can’t find a way to undo the damage,” said Severus in barely above a whisper. He stared with frightened eyes at Albus’s hand. “I can only assist you with the pain until - until the potion is no longer effective.” Albus smiled sadly, setting the goblet on the desk.
“I am not surprised,” said Albus. “Tom’s paranoia about someone finding his Horcruxes is understandable, I suppose.” Harry’s jaw dropped, a slight fear balling in the pit of his stomach. Of all the people to tell -
“I’m sure he devised his protections with the hope that if someone did stumble upon it, they would not live to speak of it.” Albus’s face grew serious as Severus’s grew more worried.
“Severus, you must concentrate on matters of your own,” said Albus firmly. “I cannot afford to have you worried about me.” Severus jaw clenched.
“That is a hell of a thing for you to say to me,” hissed Severus. “I am the one who got us into this fucking mess! If Bellatrix hadn’t been there, I would have refused to swear that damn Unbreakable Vow. I have to fix this.”
“Child, please,” said Albus sternly, as if he’d had this discussion several times already. “I have already told you what I expect of you, and I cannot be so presumptuous as to ask any more from you. I do not think that young Malfoy has the necessary temperament for being a Death Eater. Yes, he knows the dogma. Yes, he is ambitious, but a killer, Severus? Surely you of all people know that Draco is not up to this challenge, no matter what he thinks of himself. In the end, I am afraid that you will have to complete the boy’s task for him.”
“You are asking me to do something that I cannot do,” said Severus, visibly trembling in rage. “You are asking me to kill you in cold blood, Albus. You cannot ask this of me! I can’t -“ he faltered, his breathing becoming slightly ragged. He gazed into Albus’s face, pleading with his eyes.
“You can do this without me,” finished Albus quietly. “You underestimate your skill, Severus. You are the brightest young man I have ever had the pleasure and the honor of mentoring, as well as being one of my most devoted followers. You must remain within Voldemort’s confidence or all will have been for naught!”
“I would rather die!” shouted Severus. “I’d rather just let the Vow run its course! If Draco cannot kill you of his own will, I will let it take me and be done with this war!”
“That is the cowardly way out, Severus, and you know it!” said Albus intensely. “We need you. Harry needs you. After I am gone, he will need someone to teach him, Severus, someone with the right background and the right temperament for being a warrior. He needs discipline and someone to care for him as he finishes this. Remus is in no position to be that for him. There is no way for someone like Remus to truly understand Harry. You are the only one that I trust with this task, Severus. You must do what is necessary.”
“And if I refuse?” ground out Severus, glaring daggers at Albus. “If I refuse to become a traitor and a murderer in the eyes of everyone in the Order, everyone I have tried for years to convince that I had truly returned? What happens if I say no?” Harry was captivated by the expressions on both of their faces - Albus’s tired and old eyes staring into the blazing, glassy black irises of his friend.
“That is your choice, Severus,” said Albus softly. “You must do what you think is best. But realize that not only does your own fate rely on your decision, but that of young Malfoy and of Harry. Our choices are never solely contained within ourselves. They ripple outwards, like throwing pebbles in a pond. The choices we make today could affect thousands of people in the future.”
Severus ran a hand through his lank hair and walked slowly around the room. He gently brushed his fingers over some of the silver instruments sitting on the table as he passed by. From his perch in the corner, Fawkes trilled softly, the notes of his phoenix song filling the room. Severus stopped, lifting his head as he stood with his back to Albus. He slowly turned around.
“I don’t know if I can do this anymore, Albus,” said Severus. “I’m - I’m not even sure who I am anymore. I can’t protect both Draco and Harry.” Harry started at hearing his name come out of those lips without any bitterness or hatred attached.
“I can’t keep both of them from dying,” he whispered as he sank into the chair in front of Albus’s desk. He hung his head in his hands. “Too many people have already died on my account.” Albus sighed softly.
“My child, you cannot punish yourself for things that were beyond your control,” said Albus gently. “Think of how many lives you have saved by giving us information - Remus, Kingsley, Hestia, the Grangers, not to mention how many times you’ve risked your life and reputation for Harry. I could go on for hours, Severus. My accepting your renunciation of Voldemort was not conditional on you meeting a quota of good deeds. It had no condition other than you try your best to help us in any way you could, which you have done over and over again. I am asking you for one last deed - I am asking you to start the avalanche.” Severus chuckled morosely.
“You and your damn riddles,” he muttered. He stood and met Albus’s calm gaze. “Whatever you would have me do, I will do. You have my word.”
“Thank you, Severus,” said Albus quietly. “I can never repay you for your sacrifice. I hope in time you can forgive me for all the pain and suffering I’ve put you through.”
“Your trust in me is more than enough,” said Severus. He bowed his head and walked swiftly from the room.
The last of the memories faded to black as Harry felt himself being pushed out of the pensieve. He put his hands on top of the desk, hanging his head as disjointed thoughts began clicking into place. Snape getting the Defense post, even though it was jinxed - Snape tailing Malfoy for the entire year - the argument Hagrid overheard - Dumbledore’s pleading with Snape on the Tower - it was as if someone turned on a very bright light that put everything into sharp perspective.
Harry mechanically scooped up the memory, placing it back into its vial. He put it and his pensieve back into the box and shut the lid. He turned to see Kingsley waiting, his trunk open on the floor.
“You said that you wanted to talk,” said Kingsley. Harry swallowed thickly, wondering how in the world he was going to say this without getting hexed into a million pieces or sent to St. Mungo’s.
“Okay,” said Harry, “but you have to wait until I’m done to say or do anything. And you have to promise me that this stays between us. You can’t even tell the Council.” Kingsley raised his eyebrows.
“Alright,” said Kingsley hesitantly. “What’s going on?”
“I,” began Harry. He took a deep breath and spoke very rapidly. “I think that Snape may have been following orders when he killed Dumbledore.” Kingsley heard a sigh of relief from the corner of the room near the foot of Harry’s bed.
“I have to find him to make sure,” said Harry firmly. “I need to talk to him in person.”
“Ask and you shall receive, Potter,” said Severus, canceling his Disillusionment charm and lowering the handkerchief from his face. Harry drew his wand, scrambling on top of the bed and pressing himself up against the wall.
“Bloody hell,” gasped Harry, his wand hand shaking. He looked sharply at Kingsley. “How - what the -why is he -“
“Articulate as always, Potter,” said Severus softly. Harry glared at him.
“Show me,” said Harry fiercely. “Show me the phoenix.” Not breaking eye contact, Severus pulled his wand out of his holster with his left hand and touched it to the back of his right.
“Defero revelatio,” muttered Severus. The Council brand lit up on the back of his hand, creating a small glow in the room. Harry lowered his wand, unable to take his eyes off the blue phoenix. For some reason, his heart felt heavier at seeing that Snape was still loyal to Dumbledore. It brought home the fact that Dumbledore had chosen to die - and that he had chosen the way in which he died.
“We need to go,” said Kingsley, checking his watch. “It’s almost dawn.”
“Here,” said Severus evenly, tossing a parcel at Harry. “Go and get cleaned up while we finish packing your things.”
“I just have the box,” said Harry, still keeping his distance from Severus as he stepped down off the bed and walked towards the door. “Everything I want is already in my trunk.” Severus nodded once, going to the desk to retrieve the pensieve box.
“I’ll go with you and make sure the muggles don’t hear you,” said Kingsley, following him out into the hall. He returned moments later, just as Severus was pressing down hard on the lid of Harry’s trunk.
“A boy his age shouldn’t be able to put his entire life into a box,” said Kingsley sadly, looking around at the bare room. Severus lifted the lid, staring at the pell-mell way everything had been thrown inside the trunk.
“There are lots of things a boy his age should not be doing,” said Severus. He set Harry’s Firebolt against the bed before waving his wand over the piles of clothes, folding them neatly and setting them on the bed. He pulled out a cauldron and filled it with rolls of parchment, quills, ink and potion ingredients. He pulled out all of Harry’s books and cleaned out the empty candy wrappers, broken quills and scraps of parchment. He then repacked everything neatly, placing Harry’s broom and the pensive box on top.
“Where are we going to take him?” asked Kingsley softly as Severus shut the trunk easily. Severus leaned his arms on the trunk. He cancelled the spell on his hand and looked up at Kingsley.
“I don’t have room for him, Severus,” said Kingsley. “I barely have enough room for myself.” He rubbed his eyes tiredly. “Do you think he’d go to Headquarters?” Severus sighed.
“I don’t know,” said Severus. “If anyone found him there, they would ask a lot of questions he may not be able to answer. And after the Dark Lord discovers he’s left here, there will be several places he'll immediately look, one of them being Grimmauld Place. There is only one person he can send to do that.” Kingsley sat down in the chair, allowing the silence to stretch on for several minutes.
“What do you suggest then?” asked Kingsley. Severus pushed himself up.
“We will ask Potter what he wants to do,” said Severus softly. He sat down on the rickety bed and waited. Fifteen minutes later, Harry walked back into the room and shut the door quietly behind him. Kingsley grinned at him dressed in his new robes.
“Lookin’ good there, kid,” said Kingsley. Harry bent his head shyly, running his hand over the front of the emerald green robes. Severus walked over to him and brushed out a few wrinkles with his hand. He spun his finger in the air, motioning for Harry to turn around. Harry did so hesitantly, feeling incredibly awkward at being looked at so intensely.
“Not bad,” said Severus evenly. “Do you like them?”
“Yeah,” said Harry softly. “Thank you.” He looked up at Severus, who simply stared at him, an unidentifiable emotion on his face.
“Harry, we have to go,” said Kingsley, looking out the window at the sun rising over the horizon. “But you have to decide where. We can take you to Headquarters -“
“No,” said Harry firmly. “I don’t want to be in that house.”
“Harry -“ said Kingsley.
“I said no,” said Harry sternly. Kingsley looked to Severus. Severus lifted the handkerchief back over his face. Harry frowned slightly at the look in his eyes as Kingsley nodded
“Right then,” said Kingsley quickly. He rapped his wand on the lid of Harry’s trunk, shrinking it to the size of a matchbox and handing it to Harry. “It’s almost six- thirty. I need to get back to my flat and change clothes before I go to work.”
“Then let’s go,” said Severus. “We will have to go out the back. Potter, lead the way.”
“Damn it,” muttered Kingsley. “The wards -“
“Shit,” hissed Severus.
“What wards?” asked Harry, looking back and forth between them.
“The weakened wards Severus took down so he could get in,” said Kingsley rapidly. “Dumbledore set them so that no Death Eaters could get in, not even Severus, but when he died, they pretty much collapsed.”
“We don’t have time now,” said Severus. “You’ll have to come back and set them later.” He placed a hand on Harry’s back and pushed him gently into the hall. Just then, the door across the hallway opened, revealing a groggy Dudley. His beady eyes widened at the sight of three robed wizards.
“Don’t -“ hissed Harry.
“DAD! MUMMY!” hollered Dudley.
“Shit!” cried Harry and Severus, running down the hallway and the stairs. Kingsley wasn’t as quick, so he jumped the banister, stumbling slightly as he landed hard on the floor.
Harry burst through the kitchen door and raced around the kitchen table. Severus, not being familiar with the layout of the room, crashed headlong into it. Harry ran back and flicked on the light switch.
“Sorry,” he said.
“Never mind, Potter,” said Severus, quickly pushing himself up. Kingsley ran into the room, nearly bumping into Severus as he slid around the other edge of the table. The kitchen door slammed open. Vernon stood panting in the doorway, holding a pistol in his hand. He lunged at Harry, grabbing the boy’s arm. Severus grabbed Harry’s other arm as Harry tried to wrestle away from Vernon.
“Kingsley, get out of here!” shouted Severus. “I’ll handle this!” Reluctantly, Kingsley ducked out the back door. Once he was gone, Severus wasted no time in putting the muggle in a Body bind. Harry fell into him as Vernon’s heavy body hit the floor with a loud thud.
“Jesus Christ,” muttered Severus. “Are you alright, Potter?”
“Yeah,” said Harry shakily, staring in horror at the gun on the floor. Severus bent down and vanished the weapon before leaning over Vernon’s frozen face.
“I am taking Potter with me,” he said firmly. “You will never lay a hand on this child ever again. The Order will be informed of your careless disregard for every single warning we have sent you about this kind of abuse in the past and you will all be dealt with accordingly.” He held his arm out to Harry.
“Come, we’re leaving,” he said quietly. Harry nodded and grabbed onto his arm, disappearing from the room with a soft pop.