Harry Potter and the Half Blood Pimp Two

“Is that a no…? I guess it is a no.” Dumbledore sighed sadly before standing. “I guess I will have to surprise every one with a phat free style some day.”



Harry yawned as he watched Hermione rewrite the notes he had taken earlier. He was sure that he had down a good job, but it was obvious by the stack now thirty pages tall, he had missed something as his girlfriend scribbled furiously.

“You didn’t do that bad…” Hermione spoke without interrupting her writing. “I was just… I’m under a lot of stress.”

“Don’t sweat it girl.” Harry smiled an assuring, yet lopsided grin at her. “I know I ain’t even… like half as smart as you girl.” He continued, his index finger slowly pressing circles softly around Rupert’s head.

You have good finger skill human

Sick

“I can’t believe you aren’t mad at me for comparing you to a flobberworm.” Hermione continued.

“Girl, you the smartest witch in fo’ eva’. You can say any thing you want about my smarts, because you got room to talk shit.” Harry spoke nonchalantly.

“I do not!” Hermione yelped as she finally looked up from her notes. “That doesn’t mean any thing!” Hermione scowled as Harry simply pointed at her notes, the stack now much higher then it was only moments before.

“Any thing you say girl.”

Your mate is feisty

Do you have a girl friend Rupert?

“What are you telling the snake?” Hermione inquired as Harry paused to lift Rupert closer to his mouth, his hisses no louder then a whisper.

“I’m askin a playa’ if he gots a girl.” Harry replied with a smirk.

“Well does he?”

“Well do you?” Harry began conversing in parsletongue. “If you don’t that’s all right.”

“I do not have a girlfriend.” Rupert replied before uncoiling from Harry’s arm and dropping to the floor. “I will go get a girlfriend now. I will return, make sure you eat, and do not get in trouble.” Rupert commanded as he began slithering away.

“Did you offend him?” Hermione asked, perplexed by Rupert’s hasty exit.

“Muther fucker told me he was going to go get a girl, and just left me.” Harry exclaimed. “I can’t believe this shit… he just… slithered away.” He continued, his mouth hanging wide.

“Well, I suppose you will have two new friends soon.” Hermione laughed before stretching. “Let’s go to your room.”

“That’s what I’m talking bout, a girl who knows what she wants!” Harry rubbed his hands together as they stood.

“To talk.” Hermione shook her head as she placed her palm over her eyes. “To talk.”

“That’s exactly what I was talking about. I want to talk too.” Harry grinned as Hermione gave him an un-amused look.



Harry and Hermione both gave their regards to Neville, wishing him a good night as they left. Harry taking note that his friend was slightly preoccupied with watching one of the Patil twins talk to Terry Boot.

Eventually the pair found their way to Harry’s dorm, where Dobby had left two frosty mugs. One of butterbeer, the other filled with milk. A small plate of mandarin oranges lay beside the drinks.

“Even Dobby knows huh?” Harry spoke as they moved to sit, Harry deftly lifting two glasses, one in each hand. “Your beverage my love.” He smiled as he handed the milk to Hermione.

“Thank you. If I am going to have to change eating habits, you are too you know.” She smirked as Harry prodded one of the tiny bites of orange with a fingertip. “They are very good, citrus-y, yet sweet.”

“Ya, mother natures cookie I guess… right?” Harry smiled as he popped a small handful of the tiny bite sized fruits within his mouth. “So where do we start baby?”

“I’m not sure. Of course I need to begin reading about what is to come.” Hermione instantly transformed, her down to business personality kicking into over drive. “You should of course read the books with me.”

“Right.” Harry agreed. “But you read better then me. I’m down with the cat in the hat, and you bustin moby dick.”

“Harry.” She grumbled. “You are not that bad.”

“If you say so.” Harry shrugged before motioning for the conversation to continue. “I get to name it if it’s a boy.”

“What?”

“Yea, if it’s a boy. I get to name it. If it’s a girl, you got dibbies on the namin.”

“Before I agree to this stipulation, errr, agreement.” She corrected her self as Harry gave her a confused look. “I wan’t to know what you would name the baby.”

“I can’t tell you.” Harry replied.

“Why not?”

“I don’t actually know… I’m thinking about naming him after Silver.” Harry smiled softly as Hermione eyed him scrutinizinly. “Look girl, it’s better than CrunkJuice McPimp-Star Potter.”

“It had better be.” Hermione scowled murderously as Harry laughed uproariously. “Damn it Harry.” She grumbled before cracking a smile. “CrunkJuice? Merlin.”

“I’m just playin.” Harry finally composed himself enough to placate Hermione. “I gotta get you a ring to. You want bling, or sub-ling?”

“Wha?” Hermione simply cocked her head, not understanding Harry as she chewed on an orange as well.

“You know, you want 5 carat diamonds in the platinum band, or twenty 1 carats in the gold ring?” Harry explained. “Bling, your street status symbol.”

“I just want a ring, but nothing… bling… As you would put it, just show the world I am yours, and that’s all I could ever ask. May be a silver band with our names in it?” Hermione offered as she recoiled at the mention of 5-carat diamonds.

“So you telling me just to pick?” Harry questioned her slowly, his eyes following her every move.

“Yes, but subdued please. Nothing blingin.” Hermione cringed as she used Harry’s slang. “I don’t need things like that to know that you care about me.”

“You got it girl.” Harry smiled as he reached out to run his fingers through her hair, causing Hermione to cringe a bit as his fingers met resistance from a few tangles in her curly locks.

“Now, that is all later, what do we do about after I have the baby. We will still have one year left of school.” Hermione continued, her eyes wandering as her face drooped to express how badly she worried about school.

“Ill drop out, and take care of the baby, till you get done.” Harry replied. “Easy as that, you got to finish school girl.” Harry commanded.

“Is that your plan?” Hermione sighed as she reached out to grip Harry’s hand. “You will just never complete school?”

“I never completed school before I got here, and no one would be surprised if I didn’t finish school here.” Harry shrugged. “Ain’t no one ever thought I would achieve much, but you gonna give me more than I could ever ask for girl.”

“You don’t think that we are loosing something?” Hermione asked as she scooted closer to Harry, her head draping onto his shoulder. “That we will miss out on something every one else will get to enjoy, while we raise the baby?”

“Like what?” Harry asked. “I ain’t missin out on a thing. There ain’t a damn thing I ain’t done befo’.” Harry mused as he looked as though he were becoming almost nostalgic.

“But…”

“But you think you gonna miss out on somethin.” Harry elaborated for her. “I understand girl, what do you wish you could do?”

“I don’t know really. Ms. McGonagall told me that I was ruining my life, and… that I had only one real choice, if I planned to be able to live a healthy life.” Hermione sighed as she reached down to tug at a bit of string hanging from Harry’s pants leg. “She said that I was to young to understand, but would thank her later.”

“That sure doesn’t sound like her, I don’t think.” Harry spoke as he wrapped an arm around Hermione. “Not like her at all.”

“I know. That is what bothered me so much. It was like she changed.” Hermione explained as she wrapped her arms around Harry’s waist. “They called me in, and showed me the results and it was like she became another person.”

“Because she cares about you, every one does. This muther fuckin gangsta comes along and ruins your life, and of course every one is trippin on it.” Harry sighed as he gave a squeeze to Hermione’s shoulders. “You was gonna be a star, and now you gonna be a mom.”

“Moms can be stars too!” Hermione growled as she pivoted her face to look up at Harry. “I can still be any thing I want.”

Harry simply answered her with a smile, his eyes twinkling.

“You… you’re using reverse psychology on me or something!” Hermione simply stared at Harry flabbergasted. “You… you are right, I CAN do any thing I want, I just have to do it different.”

“What did you want to be before?” Harry asked, hoping he could help her some way.

“I thought about being a librarian, or a teacher, or even a researcher of new spells.” She explained as she leaned into a deeper cuddle with Harry.

“What did you want to teach?” Harry prodded.

“I don’t know actually.” Hermione laughed lightly. “I just wanted to be a teacher, of something. I wanted to work with books.”

“Do you have to teach here, or do you want to teach at a regular school?” Harry continued, hoping he could figure something out for his girl.

“I don’t know.” She yawned before leaning back on the couch. “I expected more time to decide on all this, it will take a lot of research… stop smiling like that!”

“I’m not.” Harry grunted as he bit down on his lip, unable to disguise his mirth. “You just so smart, and you worrying, and I just don’t know why.”

“Well what do YOU plan to do?” Hermione grilled him as another yawn shook her body.

“You should get some sleep.”

“No! Nope! Not going to happen. What is Harry Potter going to do?” Hermione inquired as she crossed her arms.

“Well, I don’t know either.” Harry shrugged. “I have never wanted to be any thing, but one thing.”

“What is that one thing?”

“You don’t want to hear it, you’ll get upset.” Harry replied stone-faced. “I know you will.”

“Try me, if we plan to make this work, you better be willing to talk to me Harry.” Hermione sighed. “Communication is what makes a relationship work. I read about it.” Hermione smiled gently as Harry smirked at her.

“Alive.”

“Alive? You are alive! That doesn’t make any sense!” Hermione shrieked. “Really, tell me Harry! You can trust me!”

“No, really.” Harry spoke, dipping his head to emphasize his point. “I just wanted to live. No one makes it as long as Silver did in the game, and he still got popped.”

“Oh God Harry.” Hermione sobbed softly as she reached out to grip his arm. “That’s all you ever wanted? Was to stay alive?”

“Well, I always wanted a sports car too, but… Look, I don’t know what I am going to do when we have this kid.” Harry sighed. “I can’t just up and leave the game. A lot of innocent people will die, but I don’t think you would understand.”

“Try me. I will try to understand if you give me the chance.” Hermione replied strongly, her resolve strengthening as she studied and worked with Harry.

“I’m an OG, that’s an original gangster.” Harry continued slowly. “That means I’m old money on the street.”

“Old money?”

“Pure blood’s for the wizards. I guess is the closest thing.” Harry thought as his eyebrows scrunched. “Any ways, if I give up my throne as King of the Streets, a lot of people will be waiting to take that title.”

“You are worried someone who doesn’t deserve it will get your title?” Hermione offered.

“Fuckers would kill to take over my streets. Ain’t no one who knows how to run it. Until I can find a new boss, I can’t give it up.” Harry fidgeted a bit before lifting his damaged leg with an arm, laying it up on the coffee table. “I got a responsibility to the people I protect.”

“You talk like you are some kind of mafia big man.” Hermione smiled, but her face fell as Harry nodded lightly.

“I sort of am.” Harry replied through a yawn. “Time for bed.”

“Do you think I can sleep in here?” Hermione asked, her eyelids droopy.

“I thought you would never ask.” Harry smiled before lifting his leg off the coffee table. “Let’s hit the bed.”



Harry awoke the next morning with a happy sigh. “You sposed to be cookin breakfast Macey.” He yawned as he reached over his shoulder to pet the women sleeping next to him.

“Who the hell is Macey?” Hermione shrieked as she set up in bed.

“Oh shit!” Harry replied as he rolled out of the bed, the sheets crashing around him as he floundered on the floor.

“Tell me who she is!” Hermione growled dangerously as she leant over the edge of the bed to stare at Harry.

“The black girl you saw at the Diner.” Harry replied as he stretched and lay on the floor. “The one who wanted to cut you.”

“Oh.” Hermione mouthed, unsure if she should be angry. “So she sleeps in your bed enough that you would immediately think I was her?”

“Don’t ask questions you ain’t gonna like the answers to baby.” Harry replied from the floor.

“I have a right to know.”

“Fine.” Harry sighed before explaining himself. “Macey, and the rest of the girls sleep in my bed for mutual protection.”

“Right.” Hermione replied skeptically. “Try again.”

“No, really.” He emphasized as he pressed himself up into a sitting position. “Silver started it. When we was poor. The bitches sleep in the bed with a pimp, so if someone ever trys to gat yo’ ass in the night.”

“That’s terrible, you mean you would use the women as a human shield?” Hermione shrieked wide-eyed. “That’s… it’s… barbaric!”

“I put my ass on the line every day and night for them bitches, I risk getting shot, stabbed, beat, and some muther fuckers would even rape you given a chance.” Harry spoke slowly, as though trying to explain to a child. “If a bitch can’t take a minute to watch my back, bitch can work the streets by herself.”

“I never…”

“I know, don’t worry.”

“We are going to talk about this more.” Hermione yawned a bit. “Let’s go, we have to get ready.”

“All right. At least you aren’t…” Harry began, but stopped as Hermione rushed to the bathroom, the sounds of her being ill echoing back to him. “Sick.”



The Great hall was in chaos as Hermione and Harry entered. “What the fuck is going on?” Harry asked as he looked around the room.

“Every one is excited about the upcoming tournament, obviously.” Hermione replied as she straightened her robes. “I’ll take care of this.”

“Ok.” Harry smiled as Hermione began to press her way through the crowd. For a moment, every thing seemed to be the same, and then suddenly, a loud bang silenced the entire crowd.

“Make two lines!” Hermione could be heard shouting from near the cup. “One line for those who can enter on my right, and one for those who know they can’t but will try any ways! I am a prefect! Do as I say!” She shouted as the students began to shuffle to their respective lines.

“That works.” Harry grinned before sitting down at the table, enjoying his ability to eat as every one else was preoccupied.



Hermione was feeling fairly pleased with herself. She had organized the students, and was directing the attempted entrances when a student from Durmstrang began talking to her.

“How do you do?” The seventh year boy inquired as he extended his hand to her. “I am Victor Krum.”

“Hermione Granger.” She smiled before extending her hand.

Krum surprised her as he took her hand and kissed the top. “A beautiful name, for an equally beautiful and powerful woman.” He smiled.

“Errr… Yes, well…” Hermione stuttered as she wiped her hand as nonchalantly as possible on her robe. “I extend my welcome from Hogwarts to you, and hope you enjoy your stay. I am a bit busy now.” She inwardly thanked Fred and George as they attempted to throw each other at the cup, hoping to penetrate the wards long enough to place their name sheets within.

“I see you are busy, I will give you leave.” Victor smiled as George began bleeding profusely upon the floor. “I hope we can continue our conversation another time.”

Hermione pretended not to hear him as she began directing two third year students to help Fred and George to Madam Pomfery. “Don’t let them bleed all over the floor, scourgify their tracks!” She shouted as the procession of injured began to exit to the Medical Wing.

“This competition is already dangerous, and they are just trying to enter.” She sighed as she watched the Half-Veela from the French academy place her sheet with her name within the cup. “Stupid Frenchie.” Hermione muttered as she watched the beautiful woman retreat to the Ravenclaw table with a smug look on her face.



“Excuse me.” Ronald Weasley spoke softly as he stepped up to Victor Krum. “My name is Ronald, and I couldn’t help notice you speaking to Hermione.”

“I am sorry, is that your girlfriend?” Victor nodded his head lightly as he extended his hand to Ron.

“No. THAT is her boyfriend.” Ron scowled as he pointed at Harry, who was currently pouring hot sauce all over his meal. “He is an animal.”

“Is he?” Victor asked as he leaned around Ron to stare at Harry. “He does not look that tough.”

“He isn’t.” Ron smirked. “May be we could do a little business?” A glint of evil in his eyes shimmered as he began to explain his plan.



“Hey Neville.” Harry smiled as Neville set next to him, wisps of smoke rising from his singed hair. “A shocking situation huh?”

“You could say that, I gave up after the third time that damn cup shocked me.” Neville sighed. “Hey, I just got here, where are you going?”

“To feed Hermione.” Harry replied as he grabbed the basket of breakfast rolls and emptied its contents on a squirming first years plate, he then flipped the basket back over and began to fill it with fruits, a couple biscuits, and some bacon.

“And a drink?” Neville asked as Harry snapped his fingers.”

“Thanks, almost forgot.” With a flick of his wand, which he withdrew from his trousers, gangster style, he had two large glasses of milk and pumpkin juice following him. “Holler at yer boy Neville.”

“See you Harry.”



Hermione was pleasantly surprised when Harry budged his way up to stand next to her, and was even more surprised when he reached into a basket he was carrying and withdrew a strip of bacon that he placed against her lips.

“Eat ma pork.” Harry grinned mischievously as Hermione let him slip the meat between her lips.

“You need to behave.” Hermione smirked as she chewed seductively on the meal, her show attracting more attention then she meant.

“I like that.” Harry smiled as he withdrew an apple, having placed the basket on the floor, he placed his wand against it, and the apple fell into bite-sized pieces.

“Thanks.” Hermione beamed as Harry handed her the food.

“Of course. I didn’t think you would get to eat at this rate, since you doing the job of Head Girl.”

“I’m not doing any ones job, I took it upon myself to organize this.” Hermione explained as she waved her hand at the crowd. “This is your last chance to try Dennis.” She sighed exasperatedly as Dennis Creevey took another running start at the cup and was immediately blasted backwards.

“Resilient little fucker.” Harry whistled, earning a chastising look from Hermione. “I’m just saying, he stood up fast and I swear I saw his noggin bounce off the floor.”

“It seems as though the cup is more… forgiving of certain students then others.” Hermione laughed before reaching out and grabbing the milk glass from the air. “Thanks for this.” She smiled as she drank from the cup.

“Of course girl.” Harry smiled as he summoned a chair from the Slytherin table with his wand, the chair gliding to him through the crowd. “I just need to rest a little, and you might want to too.”

“I’ll be ok.” Hermione smiled before returning to command the students about.



Eventually the entire student body was pleased with the results, whether they had entered the cup, or tried their damndest, the school eventually began to disperse for class.

“Ms. Granger.” McGonagall called as Hermione prepared to leave for class. “100 points for Gryffindor for organizational and leadership skills.”

“Thank you!” Hermione beamed.

“You also loose 100 points from Gryffindor, for not being in your dorm room last night.” McGonagall continued as Hermione’s face fell. “You will also be serving a detention with me.”

“That shit is not fair!” Harry yelled as he stepped towards his head of house. “I want detention too then! Right along side her!”

“You didn’t do any thing that was not expected of you.” Minerva scowled as she puffed her self up.

“Fine!” Harry shouted as Hermione reached out to grab his arm.

“Please Harry.”

“COLLIN!” Harry screamed as Collin Creevey was leaving the Great Hall.

“Yes Harry?” He grinned wildly as he turned. “What can I do for you sir?” He smiled as his idol spoke to him.

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but I need detention, and I got to do this.”

“ANYTHING!” Collin squealed, his body shaking with bursts of pleasure.

“You are a huge fuck head.” Harry screamed back as he cast a tickling charm on Collin.

“Oh GOD YES!” Collin nearly exploded as he dropped to the floor in raucous laughter, his body convulsing in waves of laughter and pleasure. “Harry spoke to me!”

“As… disturbing, as that may have been.” McGonagall growled, her eyebrows lifted high. “I do believe it still demands a detention.”

Harry smiled smugly.

“With Hagrid.”

“YOU CAN’T DO THAT!” Harry shouted.

“Yes, I can. I am also deputy headmistress. You will spend tomorrow night with Hagrid, beginning with your study period, while Hermione will spend her evening with me, after dinner.”

Harry scowled as Hermione rubbed a hand in circles upon his back. “Come on Harry, let’s go, we have class.”

“FUCK!” Harry yelled in frustration as Hermione practically dragged him from the room.

“Don’t make me make it two days Potter!” Minerva called back at him, chuckling to her self as Hermione cast a silencing charm on Harry.



Harry thought his morning was ruined, and his day was shaping up to be just as bad, but when dinner time rolled around, Harry realized, life could always get worse.

“The Cup has had eight hours to decide upon its entrants.” Dumbledore stated serenely as the entire Great Hall silenced. “We will eat first, then we will watch as the Cup declares the names of the competitors for the Tri-Wizard tournament. Let us feast!” Dumbledore shouted as the room burst into applause, the only one who didn’t clap was Harry.

“Who do you think it will choose?” Neville chatted excitedly with Harry and Hermione, though his eyes occasionally wandered down the table to the Patil twins.

“I think you should holler at those bitches.” Harry smirked as Neville choked on his juice. “The way the three of you is all ways throwing side ways glances at each other, you might as well get down with the twins.”

“HARRY!” Hermione sighed exasperatedly.

“What? Don’t think Neville has it in him?”

“I do too have it in me… What is it?” Neville questioned.

“You should hit it up for a three some with the Patil twins, is all I’m sayin.” Harry grinned. “Do it for the rest of us Neville.”

“So you are saying you wish I was twins?” Hermione inquired, her tone level.

“Now see girl, that’s a loose/loose situation for a playa.” Harry scowled. “If I say yes, then you get mad cuz you say you aint good enough, then if I say no, you get mad because I don’t want more of you to love or think I can only put up with one of you.”

“You know me so well Harry.” Hermione grinned. “And I was sitting here thinking you would put your foot in your mouth.”

“A pimp aims to please.”

“You guys never answered me, who is going to get picked?” Neville urged. “We all know Krum and Fleur were the only entrants from their schools, their teachers wanted to make sure they were picked.”

“I think it will be that big Syltherin, the one with bucky teeth.” Harry shrugged as he nibbled on a piece of steak. “Muther fucker is built like a brick shit house.”

Hermione simply arched an eyebrow at Harry’s description as her lips curled into a snicker. “I don’t know, and really, I think it will be a Gryffindor.”

“I think we might as well just wait till after dinner. Then we can find out.” Harry smiled. “I don’t give a shit really.”

“Well I care, I hope it’s someone who can take Hogwarts to the winning podium.” Hermione replied. “It would be nice if we could let the entire world know, our school is the best.”

“Yea.” Neville grinned. “Here here!” His fist pumped the air as he cheered Hermione.



Eventually the meal finished, which seemed far to soon for Harry as he was still eating his cheesecake when it disappeared. “Fuck, muther fuckin school wont even let a playa eat his cheesecake.” He complained as Dumbledore stood, the entire assembly falling silent in anticipation.

“Within moments, the cup will spew forth the first competitors name.” Dumbledore explained as he used his wand to float the cup over the center of the great hall.

The entire hall jumped in their seats as Fred and George began pounding the table, their rhythmic screaming punctuating the silence of the room. “FRED AND GEORGE! FRED AND GEORGE!” They yelled in an ever-increasing crescendo as the cup began to pulsate and throb, spurts of blue flame erupting forth to the beat of their chanting.

For a moment, silence rained again as the cup began violently shaking, flames pouring out of its brim like a blue oil fire, and then every thing froze. The entire room was on tender hooks, every one craning their neck to see how the cup would declare the first competitor.

Harry yawned, much to the chagrin of Hermione who seemed to be very intent on seeing who the first competitor was. “Harry, at least pretend to be excited.” She whined before the cup practically exploded.



BOOOM!

The explosion of noise and light that erupted from the cup was deafening as the name VICTOR KRUM blazed above the cup in a sparkling array of fireworks and noise.

“OH SHIT!” Harry could be heard screaming as he ducked in his seat, his hand on his wand. “Muther fucker! That sounded just like a fucking bomb going off!”

What ever else Harry had to say was muffled as the rest of the great hall began clapping and celebrating. Krum simply stood from his seat and bowed three times, his face betraying that he was not surprised by his name being chosen.



The clapping died down immediately as the cup began pulsing, repeating its previous performance, of fire and light.

“Fuck this.” Harry scowled as he put his fingers in his ears. “Muther fuckin cup gonna make a pimp deaf.” His face scrunched up in irritation.



BOOOM!

Again the room shook with passion as the cup spat forth fireworks that now took the form of flowers. The name Fleur Delacour shined above their heads as small rose petals sank slowly to the floor.

It seemed as though the entire male population of Hogwarts was attempting to scream themselves deaf as Fleur stood and wrist waved, a smug smiled plastered upon her face.

Harry settled with making Hermione giggle as he placed his hands in front of his chest and wiggled his index fingers in circles. “They spinnin!” He mouthed at her through the crescendo.



Finally, the room fell silent once more as the cup shook. All of Hogwarts waited in excitement as the cup began to spew different colors of flame. Gold, Yellow, Silver, and Green flames began to erupt from the cup as it wiggled in the air.

“It’s obviously going through the different houses names.” Hermione explained as she watched the cup perform its works.

Harry simply shrugged before putting his fingers back in his ears. Part of him wanted to know whom their representative was to be, but part of his mind also wondered what it would be like to lick cheesecake off of Hermione’s ass. Hermione’s ass won as Harry closed his eyes and grinned to himself.



BOOOOM!

Again the room shook as the school burst into cheers. For a moment Harry thought about sticking with his fantasy, but eventually opened an eye to view the name Cedric Diggory burning in the air, yellow smoke pouring off of the letters.

“Pretty boy?” Harry laughed as he opened both eyes. “Pretty boy Diggory is going to be our champion?” Harry felt as though he were going to burst as he twisted in his seat to see Cedric waving wildly from his seat. “At least he is happy.” Harry grinned as he watched Hermione clap with mixed feelings.

“Well that does it, I’m gonna sneak down to the kitchens and get some cheesecake, and I want to see you in my room in 10 minutes.” Harry smiled at Hermione as she cupped a hand to her ear, unable to hear him over the deafening roar of the school.

“I said I am gonna eat cheesecake and strawberry out of yo’ ass crack!” Harry smiled back, as he realized Hermione couldn’t hear a thing he was saying.

“Ok, we will talk in a minute!” She smiled back, oblivious to any thing Harry was saying.

“Ok!” Harry smiled back.

Every thing felt pretty good at that moment. Harry was happy with his current situation, and was pretty sure if he played his cards right, cheesecake night would be all right.

That was until the cup began pulsing again. Red and Gold fire began to explode slowly from the cup at first, and then, it sped up. “What the hell?” Harry asked as he recognized the beat to the flames. “That’s my song.”

“What?” Hermione inquired as the entire school had fallen silent, all eyes returning to the cup.

“I know that beat.” Harry continued, “That’s my beat.”

“Really?”



(Nick Cannon- Gigalo Verse 1)

Shorty I, only got one night in town, tell me baby where you down

Bushes we won\'t beat around, bushes we just eat \'em now

Feeling yo Masqueno blouse, seven jean, Black and Lebonese

Head to her knees, please if you ever need a bastard remember me

Just rock to the melody, I got you in bed wit me

I thought you would never leave

You wanna name meLike A-merie

Know the chain freeze wrist be the same degrees

Tryna get lil\' mami, in that thang of reese

Only getting in for free, if you came wit me

Cause I\'ma grown man, not B2K

If I need a girlfriend, it won\'t be to-day

No, I\'m NOT tryna be ya man, pimp bones in my body

Rock them body-hotty, rock them, like ladi-dadi

Me and Kels on the cotty, wanna see you drop it shawty

Oh weee, tryna leave the club, wit a groupie



BOOOM!

The room shook one more time as Harry finished rapping to the beat.

“FUCK NO!” Harry screamed as he pointed at the letters shining in gold and green above his head. Harry Potter glimmered and shined as all eyes turned to him.

“You entered Harry?” Neville shrieked as he began clapping. “How did you do it?”

“Fuck na man, I didn’t enter shit!” Harry yelped. “Not a god damn thing!”

“GO HARRY!” Fred and George began yelling as the Great Hall began to split. It was obvious only a small group of people supported Harry in representing the school in ANYTHING, let alone being a part of a competition.

“Harry?” Hermione questioned, obviously waiting to hear what Harry had to say about the situation.

“No. I didn’t enter baby.” Harry explained as he began to stand. “I’ma tell Dumbledore I ain’t doin this shit.”

“Could all entrants for the Tri-Wizard tournament enter the door to my right?” Dumbledore bellowed over the din of students. “All entrants enter here please. Yes, that is you also Harry!”



“E’ is vut a crip’el” Fleur shouted as Harry limped into the room.

“I do not believe he should be allowed to compete.” Cedric screamed, as Fleur finished her tirade. “It is obvious he is not physically fit enough to perform the duties of a competitor.”

Harry simply stared, taking a mental note as Krum leaned back against the wall.

“Mr. Potter.” Dumbledore smiled. “I would like to have an explanation, if you would.”

Harry turned to face Dumbledore. “I didn’t enter my name in the cup. After I saw what happened to that Creevey kid, I didn’t even get near it.”

“Ahah!” Cedric yelled as he lifted a finger in the air. “So you WERE going to try! Obviously that Prefect Granger entered your name!”

“Suck my dick.” Harry replied, his manner cold and calm.

“Harry!” Dumbledore yelped as he prepared to stun Harry, pleased that Harry hadn’t reacted violently to Cedric’s accusations.

“Listen here you little shit.” Cedric began to growl as he walked towards Harry, his wand drawn.

“Come at me muther fucker. Do it. I’ll shove that stick up yer ass so far y’all be pulling splinters out yo tonsils… bitch.” Harry spoke, his right hand taking a tighter grip around his cane.

“There will not be violence here.” Dumbledore spoke forcefully. “If Harry says he did not enter, I will believe him.”

Harry didn’t turn from staring at Cedric. “Well that’s nice that you believe me, because I ain’t competin.”

“It is to late.” Dumbledore sighed sadly. “The cup chose you, and you have no choice but to compete.”

“Fuck the cup, I ain’t doin shit.” Harry spat as his nostrils flared slightly.

“Ve vas terrivle language skills.” Fleur complained as she cringed at Harry’s colorful language.

“Listen French toast, I can talk how ever the fuck I want.” Harry smirked as a vein began to appear on Cedric’s eyebrow.

Fleur began to speak quickly in French, her hands pressed into fists at her side as she yelled at Harry.

“Harry.” Dumbledore spoke softly as he lifted a hand to silence Fleur. “I am sorry, but now that you are entered, you can not back out.”

“Bull shit.” Harry spat as he turned to Dumbledore. “Just use yo magick and take me out of this shit.”

“I can’t. If I could, I would. It is not possible. All of you will be competing.” Dumbledore sighed as he watched Harry begin to shake in fury.

“I believe, it will be an enlightening experience for him.” Victor Krum finally spoke from the shadowy part of the room they were in. “I think it will be very interesting to see how he handles himself.”

Harry let his eyes flicker to Krum for a moment, before snapping back to Cedric. “Thanks. I think…” Harry smirked.

“Oh, I don’t support you. I just think it will be interesting to see you be crushed.” Krum laughed. “Don’t thank me, I’m expecting you to be hurt grievously.”

“Yea, I like that.” Cedric smiled as he slipped his wand back in his pocket. “I didn’t think of it that way.”

“You poor voy.” Fleur smirked as she too perked at the thought of Harry’s plight.

“Y’all bitches are pussy.” Harry scowled. “I don’t even want to be in this shit, and ya’ll are lookin to see me get beat down.”

“Scared?” Cedric smiled as Fleur smirked at his taunting of Harry.

“Cedric, you so pussy, if I punched you in the mouth right now, I’d be elbow deep in coochy grease.” Harry laughed as Fleur gagged.

“That is disgusting.” Krum scowled as he shook his head admonishingly.

“Well.” Dumbledore clapped his hands together with a small pained smile on his face. “I will give you all leave to prepare for the first task. It will be in one week, and I dare say, you will all be hard pressed to find a more difficult challenge.”

“I’m still pissed.” Harry grumbled as he waited for the rest of the contestants to exit the room, he flat out refused to allow any of them to stand behind him. “I can’t believe you be making me do this shit.”

“It is not within my control Harry.” Dumbledore sighed. “I am more worried about Ms. Grangers nerves, then your safety. I can only beg you to please think of her and whom she carries, and study hard for the competition. I hate to think of what your injuries could do to her, or your bundle of joy.”

“FUCK!” Harry shouted as he began to leave the room.



There was an explosive roar of boo’s and cat calls as Harry exited the room. It seemed that the entire school had decided to voice their opinion against Harry as he began to make his way back to the Gryffindor table.

“I can’t believe this shit.” He scowled as Collin and Dennis Creevey took turns patting his back and cheering him. “Hey, you guys are getting a little to feely.” Harry shouted over the roar of the crowd as Dennis reached out to touch him the seventh time.

Hermione simply smiled sadly as she reached out to hold his arm. “I don’t know what happened Harry, and I am sorry every one is acting like this.” She sighed. “Won’t Dumbledore let you exit the tournament?”

“No.” Harry practically had to shout over the roar of the crowd as he beckoned her to leave with him.

“It’ll be ok Harry.” Neville smiled. “Remember! BE HAPPY!” He shrieked as he pointed at a necklace he was wearing of hemp rope.

Harry smirked lightly as he began to exit, Hermione walking before him with Neville as the students all scowled and screamed at him.

One student in particular caught Harry’s attention as he began to scream to the boy next to him. “I bet that bitch Granger put his name in the cup!” The boy shouted, oblivious to the fact Harry was standing behind him. “I heard she has been sneaking out of the dorms to fuck him! She is like a whore or something!” He screamed, unaware that the boy who he was speaking to was wide eyed, not because of his revelations, but because of Harry seething behind him.

BONNNNGGGG!

The heavy wooden table shook as Harry had palmed the back of the boy’s head and slammed it downwards. He didn’t even speak as he resumed his trek back towards Hermione, ignoring the howls of pain and splatters of blood as the boy writhed on the floor.

“Everything ok?” Hermione asked as she finally turned back to look for Harry. “I thought I had lost you there. Hey, what is wrong with Terry?” She questioned as she noticed the boy squirming on the floor.

“He’s fine, just feelin sick.” Harry shrugged as he gripped her arm. “Let’s go.”



“What are you going to do?” Neville inquired as they sat in Harry’s common room. “If Dumbledore won’t let you back out of the competition, how do you plan to… you know?” He explained as he pointed at Harry’s injured leg.

“Doesn’t he understand you can’t do this?” Hermione whimpered as she bit her lip pensively. “Doesn’t he see you are hurt?”

“I can do this shit. I just don’t want to.” Harry replied indignantly. “I ain’t a fucken in-vo-let.”

“I know Harry.” Hermione breathed quickly. “I’m just worried about you. Last time this competition was held, someone died.”

“Well, if any one is going to die, it will be Cedric. That pussy is askin for an ass beaten as badly as Ron.” Harry spat as he reached out to wrap an arm around Hermione.

“Cedric was not nice?” Neville asked.

“Fucker told me I was to broke to compete, and acted hard cuz The Spinnin Frenchie was there.”

“Spinnin Frenchie?” Hermione snorted, a sinking feeling in her gut lifting as Harry continued.

“That bitch was talkin shit to me in French and English. I hate her, and this fucker named Krum is a bitch to.” Harry scowled. “All these bitches is pussy.”

“Well, in brighter news. I plan to ask the Patil twins to Hogsmeade when we have the next weekend trip.” Neville smiled as Harry whooped.

“That’s what I’m talking bout!” Harry grinned. “Just lay back and let em ride yo’ ass. One on yo’ snake and one on yo’ face!” Harry cheered.

“Merlin!” Hermione shrieked. “I can’t believe you!” She continued as she swatted at Harry, a look of disgust on her face.

“I’m just sayin.” Harry grinned as Neville blushed furiously. “Is that what you beat it to?”

“HARRY!” Neville screamed, his voice reaching a falsetto. “I don’t! I wouldn’t! I… yes…” His voice dropping pitch as he finally admitted to his actions, a deep blush permeating his cheeks.

“Shit, don’t be ashamed Neville. Just ask the bitches out, and then stick it to ‘em.” Harry grinned as he chuckled. “If they ask fo’ money though, tell me so I can straighten they asses out.”

“Harry.” Hermione growled as she placed a hand on his thigh.

“I’m just sayin…”

“Harry. You are all ready digging your self in a hole. Stop while you are ahead.”

“A’ight.”



“I am most pleased with Master Potter.” Dumbledore smiled as he sat within the teachers lounge. “He did not resort to violence when Mr. Diggory confronted him.”

“That doesn’t mean any thing Albus.” Minerva scoffed as she stirred a sugar cube into her tea. “It is not much to be proud of, when all you can be proud of is a boys ability to control his emotions.”

“Is it?” Dumbledore inquired. “I do believe, if Mr. Potter had not had the influence of Ms. Granger, Mr. Diggory would have been dead or worse before I could have drawn my wand.”

“I don’t see where you are going with this Albus.” McGonagall sighed. “I will not forgive them for their actions, no matter how much Mr. Potter begins to mimic normal people.”

“Ms. Granger is becoming an instrumental tool in teaching Harry!” Dumbledore exclaimed. “She is showing him, that he can be a boy.”

“You desire he be a boy, when a man is what is required when he becomes a father?” Minerva spat as she spilled a bit of tea with her rough stirring.

“I believe Harry is a man, and I would like to see him understand what it means to be a boy. He has never had the pleasure of childhood, and it will be a world he will be thrust into when their CHILD is born.” Dumbledore spoke evenly, his frustration obviously surfacing.

“Hermione will handle that. Harry will be of no use to her when the child is born. That much is obvious.” Minerva growled back. “He will abandon her the moment he has to change a diaper.”

“That is not TRUE!” Dumbledore exclaimed, fighting to keep his composure as a glass trinket exploded on a shelf near by. “You do not believe that, any more then I. Have we both not seen Harry caring for Ms. Granger as she threw up? He wiped the snot off of her face with his bare hand, I do not believe a dirty diaper will deter him.” Albus growled as he attempted to calm himself.

“It may not be diapers that will deter him.” McGonagall replied, her lips pursed as a vein twitched above her brow dangerously. “It may not be the day the child is born, it may not be the year, but he will give up. He is weak, and nothing but a thug. He will destroy her. She will slave away for the child, while he sleeps around and partakes in extra-marital relationships and vice.”

Dumbledore didn’t speak as he allowed her to continue, his eyes drawn into slits.

“She could have been any thing she wants. It is over for her. She refuses to dispose of the bundle of pain that is growing within her womb. She won’t listen to reason, and when her beauty is gone, and her brains have faded, she will be left with nothing.”

“Good night Minerva.” Dumbledore replied evenly as he stood. “I have nothing more to say to you, until you realize that Hermione, is not your daughter, and Harry is not the man you believe him to be. They are both much stronger then you give them credit.”



Harry awoke the next morning fidgety. Hermione hadn’t slept in his bed, and it felt empty. “I hate this.” He growled as he began to prepare for the day. “I have got to get that girl to where she can sleep here… It aint like I can get her re-prgnant.” He laughed as he stretched.

The rest of the day was uneventful as possible. Harry enjoyed his time with Hermione, and took to ignoring the students who were being most audible in their disgust with Harry’s position.

“I don’t even know why every one is trippin.” He sighed as Hermione reached over to rub his shoulder during lunch. “Every one is pissed because I’m in this competition, and I don’t even want to be in it.”

“We know that Harry, but every one else thinks you entered…” Hermione began to speak but stopped, unsure of how to continue.

“Entered…? They sayin sumthin else ain’t they?” Harry prodded.

“Well… Yes, they are saying I got your name in the cup. Since I was so bossy and wanted every one to make lines, they said I snuck your name in for you.”

“But they ain’t sayin it like that is they?” Harry continued. “Tell me who is talking shit.”

“Every one is Harry. Really. It’s like the entire school turned on you, and me.” Hermione sighed. “You can’t fight the whole school.”

“Give me a name, and I will make an example out of ‘em.” Harry scowled.

“Like you did Terry Boot?” Hermione asked. “Yes, I heard what you did to him.”

“What, they can’t handle it when Harry flips it on em?”

“Harry! Breaking a guys nose because of something he said is not the way you handle your self here.” Hermione implored him.

“On the streets, he woulda woke up in a ditch dead some where.” Harry grumbled in reply.

“This isn’t the street Harry. You can’t do things like that in the real world. Sometimes you have to turn the other cheek.” Hermione sighed as she pinched on his neck.

“I aint gonna let a muther fucker disrespect you.” Harry pressed on. “He was talking shit about you. I ain’t gonna stand for it.”

“No matter what you do, they will still talk about me. I’m a Prefect for Merlin’s sake. They will be angry with me no matter what.” Hermione smiled, attempting to relax Harry.

Harry crossed his arms in reply, obviously frustrated with his inability to control the population of students. “I can try.” He muttered, aware that Hermione had not heard him.



Eventually, Harry finished Care of Magickal creatures class. This time, without incident, and waited patiently as Hermione began her trek back to the school.

“I have detention with you.” Harry shrugged as Hagrid gave him a questioning look.

“Ye’ do?” Hagrid asked. “I know ye’ let the snakes loose, but I ain’t mad.”

“No, McGonagall is putting me in detention with you. I tried to get detention with Hermione, and she split us up to punish me.”

“Right. Well, that sounds like her.” Hagrid grunted as he scratched his head. “Well, let’s go detention som’en.”

“Heh. All right.” Harry smiled, silently thankful that Hagrid was not angry at his previous performance within his class.

“Harry?” Hagrid called as they stopped at the edge of the forest. “Why did you let the snakes loose?”

“I can talk to them.” Harry shrugged. “I couldn’t let em be fed to what ever it was you was gonna feed em to.”

Hagrid nodded slowly for a moment before placing a hand on his shoulder. “You have a good heart boy.” He smiled beneath his scraggly beard. “A good strong heart.”

Harry simply shrugged in reply.

“Want ter see a dragon?” Hagrid grinned as he stood back up to his full height, a twinkle in his eye. “I’m sur’posed to feed em tonight, and since you is goin t’er be fightin one, mabe I can sneak ye’ a peak.”

“Yea buddy!” Harry grinned. “I ain’t never seen a dragon.”

“They are beautiful creatures Harry. Wondrous and gentle animals, they are.”

“Cool man, I like gentle.” Harry smiled as they began the journey into the forest.



Hermione sat in the Great Hall fidgeting. She was worried about what Hagrid may be making Harry do as part of his detention. “God, I wish Harry hadn’t exploded.” She sighed as Neville passed her a chicken leg. “I wish he wasn’t so hot headed some times.”

“He is a good guy, he just wanted to be there with you.” Neville smiled as he attempted to console her. “He isn’t a normal person. You know that, it’s like I am preaching to the choir.”

“I know, but what if he gets hurt. Hagrid could be making him do any number of things with all sorts of dangerous creatures.” Hermione sighed as she stabbed at her mashed potatoes with her fork.

“Harry won’t get hurt. Hagrid is a good teacher. They are probably carving whistles, or cleaning those blasted skrewts.” Neville smiled at her. “He isn’t going to get hurt.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that.” Ronald Weasley drawled as he sat next to Hermione. “The cripple may just find himself in trouble when he gets to the first task.”

“Leave us alone.” Hermione scowled as Ron reached over to her plate and snatched her chicken leg away. “That was mine!” She shouted.

“Bug off Ron!” Neville growled, feeling much braver then usual. “We don’t want your kind around here.”

“You have a problem LongBottom? What do you mean, my kind?” Ron prodded. “Your little buddy, the moron from the streets isn’t here to protect you, so I would speak more kindly to me.”

“Harry doesn’t protect me.” Neville growled dangerously. “Now what the hell do you want? I’m getting ready to smash your face in Weasley.”

“Ho ho!” Ron laughed as he turned to Hermione. “It isn’t, what I want… it is a question of who.”

“I’m with Harry, and there isn’t any thing you can do about it to change that Ronald.” Hermione scowled as she leant away from the boy who was scooting closer and closer to her. “Harry is not going to be happy with you.”

“I’m not afraid of him. Never was, I was just… biding my time.” Ron laughed as he reached out to touch Hermione’s face. “See, I made friends with some of the guys from Durmstrang, and they agree with me.”

“About what?” Hermione asked as she slapped Ron’s hand away for the third time.

“About taking care of Harry, so you and I can get to know each other better… of course… If you were to…” Ron smiled sickly as he rotated a wrist in the air. “Leave Harry. I could be persuaded to call my friends off.”

“Get away from me.” Hermione breathed slowly, her body shaking as she gripped her wand in her hand white knuckled. “Get out of my sight you bastard.”

“I’m just trying to protect Harry.” Ron smiled. “We wouldn’t want him to become… any more injured then he already is. Now would we?”

“She said leave.” Neville growled as sweat began to bead down his brow, his eyes flashing angrily. “If you don’t leave now, I will be forced to make you.”

“What ever you say Neville.” Ron laughed as he stood. “Just remember what I said. Oh, and if any thing were to happen to me. Well, the boys at Durmstrang wont be very pleased with that. I wouldn’t tell him what I said, if I were you.”

“I can not believe that guy.” Neville spat as he placed the last chicken leg off of his plate onto Hermione’s. “Hey, Harry would kill me if he found out you didn’t eat.” Neville smiled softly as Hermione gave him an incredulous look.

“Thanks Neville. I… what do I do?” She sniffed as she lifted the chicken leg up, staring at it tentatively before taking a bite. “What will Harry do?”

“I don’t think you want to hear what I think he would do.” Neville chuckled. “As Harry would say… There is fin to be a throwdown.”



“WOW!” Harry laughed as he and Hagrid stumbled out of the forest around three in the morning. “That was some shit.” He continued as smoke wisped slowly off of his burned robe and singed hair.

“I’m glad ye’ liked ‘em.” Hagrid smiled as he came into view, his beard and eyebrows were both charred, and most of his moleskin coat was in tatters. “Like I say’s, ther’ gentle as lambs.”

“Right.” Harry smirked as he stretched. “Especially when they be trying to set yo ass on fire.”

Hagrid simply chuckled in reply.

“So is that Weasley guy in the forest, with the dragons. Is he related to that ass hole Ron?” Harry inquired as they made their way to Hagrid’s hut.

“Language ‘Arold.” Hagrid admonished as they continued to walk. “’E is.”

“Wow. Such a cool guy, and he’s related to Ron. What a waste.” Harry laughed, causing Hagrid to laugh as well.

“That isn’t very nice.” Hagrid smiled as they both sat upon the steps to Hagrid’s cabin. “ ‘Erry, can I interest ye’ in a kip? If ye’ don’t tell Dumbledore, er’course.”

“ ‘es sir!” Harry smiled as Hagrid drew a large bottle from under a step.

“T’er tha dragons!” Hagrid cheered as he took a long swig from the tankard and handed it to Harry.

“To them dragons.” Harry concurred as he took a large swig as well.

Earlier that night-



Hermione’s detention had not been as relaxing as Harry’s. It seemed that facing dragons, and almost being set on fire could be more enjoyable a detention than facing McGonagall.

“Ms. Granger, you will be required to simply speak with me.” Minerva spoke levelly, as she motioned towards two chairs. “Face to face.”

“That’s all?” Hermione inquired, her face belaying her inability to believe that her Head of house simply wanted conversation. “But… I thought this was a detention…”

“It is, I’m forced to suffer through this conversation.” McGonagall scowled as Hermione looked hurt.

“This is about Harry and I. Isn’t it?” Hermione began slowly as she sat down at a desk, McGonagall facing her. “I have all ready made up my mind.”

“I wish to know why. Why do you insist on going down this path?” Minerva questioned. “You are so very bright the gleaming star in an ocean of mediocrity. “Yet, you insist on burning bridges.”

“I…” Hermione stuttered slightly at the mix of praise and admonishment bestowed upon her. “I am not going to kill a child. I can’t. Harry is supporting me.”

“How so?” Minerva questioned coldly.

“How so…? What do you mean?” Hermione asked, obviously unsure of how to handle the question.

“How does he support you?”

“He loves me…”

“Does he? What does he do, that shows you he loves you? Partake in sexual intercourse with you?” Minerva scowled as she stared a hole through Hermione.

“He… he tells me he loves me. He protects me, and does what he thinks is right for me.” Hermione pressed, her voice wavering slightly as pink flushed through her cheeks.

“Are you saying that breaking Terry Boot’s nose is right?” McGonagall scowled as she prodded at Hermione’s faith. “He is doing what he thinks is right?”

“Well, no it isn’t right. Harry thinks it is though. I talked to him about it, and he said he would try to not do it again.”

“Try?” Minerva smirked. “Is that all he can do? Try? Did he try to do what was right, when he impregnated you with his seed?”

“Actually. That was my fault.” Hermione growled slightly as she felt a deep need to stand up for her mate. “I was the one who over took Harry, and had my way with him.”

“I have a disturbing lack of faith in that statement.” Minerva scoffed as she leaned back in her seat. “I was prepared to press charges against Harry for rape, before I spoke to you.”

“He would not do that!” Hermione shouted as she felt her chest constrict. “I can be bad too! I have my own desires, I’m not a frigid book worm!”

McGonagall had no answer for her, simply watching as Hermione felt tears prick behind her eyelids.

“I love him. I didn’t at first, but I realized he is a good man.” Hermione implored as her shoulders shook, her eyes squeezed tightly closed.

“You sound less like you are making a statement, and more as though you are trying to convince your self.” Minerva spoke softly as she watched the young girl fidget in her seat.

“He has done terrible things. He was a great big prat when I met him, but I learned about him. I studied him, and I asked him questions. He taught me…”

“Taught you what? Taught you that women are objects, and murder and drugs are all right?” Minerva snapped as her eyes neared to become slits.

“YES! YES! Some drugs are ok! If any one knows what murder is, Harry would!” Hermione shrieked as her voice began to rise. “His parents…” She began, but was cut off by McGonagall.

“What do you know about his parents? Lily and James were wonderful people, who would be ashamed of their son if they lived.” Minerva screamed back, her hands clinched into fists. “Neither of you have the right to speak of them! Besmirching their name! She DIED FOR HIM!”

“I. Have. EVERY RIGHT.” Hermione growled dangerously. “HARRY HAS EVERY RIGHT!” She yelled as her body shook. “I have seen him. He doesn’t read about them! He doesn’t look at their pictures! He is afraid of them! ASHAMED!” Hermione screamed as she began crying, tears running from her eyes as her lips pursed in anger.

“Well, at least he isn’t a total loss.”

“You are a horrible person!” Hermione sobbed as she watched the idol like worship of her Head of house crumble around her. “He hates them! He doesn’t understand! I read his lips when he reads, and he mutters about them. He doesn’t know I watch him, but I do! He hates his parents, because he doesn’t understand. Fear and lack of knowledge breed hate, and he is the number one example, next to Voldemort!” Hermione continued as she stared Minerva in the eyes.

“What does that have to do with any thing?”

“EVERY THING! I am here for him. I fill the void he has in his life, just as he does for me!” Hermione spat as she felt her energy slipping away. “I am his mother, friend, and lover. I am every thing he needs, and all I want from him is to be with me. I am teaching him, and that is the only job I have ever wanted. I wanted to teach, and now, I am!”

“He can’t learn. He is an idiot, too far gone for salvation.” Minerva spoke slowly, flat out refusing to listen. “He will never be human. He is an animal from the street, who should be kept behind bars for observation.”

“How could you say that? That is the same attitude that bred Voldemort and Grindelwald. Every dark wizard ever known grew from the same cesspool of ideas that is pouring out of your mouth. How could you say something like that?”

“Because I can! I have a daughter, who could have been someone. She could have been just as great as you, but she threw it away for a man who does nothing for her. I can say any thing I want, because I have lived this before!” McGonagall exploded, tears now leaking from her eyes. “You are sneaking away from your home. Sneaking out of your dorm. Sneaking all around, and yet, I don’t see a ring on your finger! What has he done for you, but make false and empty promises!”

“Been there for me, when no one else has. He showed me that I could be any thing I want to be, no matter what.” Hermione sighed as she laid an elbow upon her desk, her face drooping into her hand.

“Then come out to the public. Let every one know you have his child. Why aren’t you proud of it then? Why aren’t you telling the world?” Minerva spoke quickly, pressing her self upon Hermione in her emotionally weakened state.

“Because I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because… I…”

“You are ashamed?” Minerva continued softer now.

“I… I just… I want to wait.” Hermione breathed slowly as her chest tightened. “I’m not ashamed. I just want more time.”

“Well, obviously you have all the time you could handle. You will regret your choice. For the rest of your life, when you suffer and berate your self, remember me, and remember what I said to you. You will have no one to blame but your self.” Minerva growled dangerously as she stood. “Detention is over.”

Hermione continued to cry softly as she listened to Minerva leave the room. Unable to bring her self to stand, she simply laid her head upon the cold desk, her eyes closed tightly.

It felt like hours to her when she heard the door open softly, a soft click echoing through the room as it shut. “Ms. Granger?” The voice of Severus Snape inquired, causing her to sit up straight.

“Professor?” Hermione breathed as she attempted to straighten her robes. “I’m sorry, I was just…”

“It is fine. I desire to speak to you… as loathe as I am to say this, I believe… Mr. Potter will benefit from your influence.”

“Sir?” Hermione questioned as she rubbed at her eyes, self conscious of the obvious wreck she looked like. “I don’t understand.”

“The smartest witch in a century, and she doesn’t understand?” Snape huffed as he took the seat Minerva had occupied earlier. “Your decision is very Gryffindor.”

“It is?”

“It is very brave of you to stand strong against opposition. You wish to stand for what you believe in. That takes strength. I can respect this.” Snape explained as he fidgeted in his seat, obviously uncomfortable under the scrutinizing look that was upon him by Hermione. “It will take more then bravery to handle Harry Potter I dare say.” He smiled as Hermione snorted.

“I feel you. Ugh… He is rubbing off on me.” Hermione scowled as a smile tugged at the edge of her lips.

“I would say, you have rubbed off on him far more, then he has upon you. I see how he uses you as his pillar of strength. Has he shown you his marks?” Snape continued as Hermione sat in awe of her teachers new found caring nature.

“No, he hasn’t. He always seems so… withdrawn, when it comes to our schoolwork. He does seem to be trying harder, he even tried writing notes for me.” Hermione laughed softly as Snape snorted.

“Potter has gone from flunking, to an acceptable within my class alone.” Snape explained as his voice hinted at an emotion Hermione had never heard expressed in his speech. Perhaps it was pride? “You have truly turned the young man around on his path.”

“Have I? I feel like… I am loosing more then I am gaining.” Hermione sighed as she felt tears prick at her eyes again.

“Is it YOU who believe in this loss, or perhaps, someone else placing that feeling within you? Perhaps you should take time to search your heart and soul for that answer. I will not say that I believe that Harry can give up his duties, but I do believe you can find a niche within his life.” Severus continued as he sighed softly.

“Is there something bothering you Professor?” Hermione questioned, unsure of why Professor Snape, the meanest teacher at Hogwarts, was spending his evening comforting a silly girl.

“Yes, actually. I can’t hate him any more. I could hate his father. I could despise him, and loathe him. I could pine for the love of his mother, and hate her for being with my enemy. I could hate Harry, for sharing the blood of James. Now, I have no one left to hate, but my self.” Snape spoke sadly, as though he had lost a toy.

“Well, you two have more in common then you think.” Hermione smiled sadly as Snape gave her an incredulous look. “He hates his parents too.”

“Why is that?”

“He can’t forgive them, for throwing him away. He thinks it is their fault that they died, and that he is what they hate now. He blames them, because he is ashamed of what they may see in him.” Hermione attempted to explain as she huffed in annoyance at her lack of vocabulary to describe her mind. “Do you understand what I am trying to say?”

“Too well.” Snape shrugged. “You will not speak of this, I trust.” Snape stated sternly as he stood. “I will walk you back to your dorm, as it is very late. I would hate for our resident hall stalker to catch you out of bed without escort.”

“Filtch?” Hermione smiled as Snape shook his head in the negative.

“Mrs. Norris. I hate cats.” He scowled as Hermione snickered behind him.



Hermione stood near the entrance to the Great Hall as breakfast time rolled around. Her forehead creased in worry lines as she watched student after student enter. “Where is Harry?” She spoke slowly as her stomach tightened.

“Hermione?” Neville spoke as he entered the room. “Everything ok?”

“Have you seen Harry?” She inquired as she wrung her hands. “Do you think he is ok?

“I haven’t seen him all morning.” Neville stated. “Come on, let’s sit down, and I will go ask McGonagall if she knows where he is in a minute. You know Harry, always late to breakfast right?” Neville chuckled reassuringly, though a flutter in his voice betrayed his worry.

“Right.” Hermione whimpered, her eyes wandering to the entrance door incessantly. “Always late.”

Hermione and Neville both felt sick with worry as they noticed that it was nearing the end of breakfast, and Harry had still not shown himself. “Where is he?” Hermione growled as she ran her fingers through her hair. “I’m going to ask McGonagall.”

“You didn’t say Professor.” Neville spoke, stunned by Hermione’s tone of voice as she practically spat the name.

“We aren’t on good terms right now.” Hermione replied as she began walking towards the teacher’s table.

“Oh.” Neville breathed as he watched her stomp towards their head of house.



“Professor.” Hermione spoke curtly. “Where is Harry?”

“Harry Potter is currently sleeping off a hang over.” McGonagall scowled as she looked up from her meal. “As is our grounds keeper and care of magickal creatures teacher, Professor Hagrid.”

“You sent Harry to drink, as his punishment?” Hermione gaped as Dumbledore concealed a snort with a cough.

“No. I didn’t.” McGonagall scowled. “I sent him to be punished, as when Harry did not return to the Castle, I investigated why. He was found, with Hagrid sleeping on the grass outside of the hut. Both of them are fine… Well, not fine. But they are safe.”

“Well… thank you Professor.” Hermione nodded as she turned to leave.

“Ms. Granger?” Dumbledore called before she had a taken her leave. “Go easy on him, when you berate him. Hagrid does not drink normal liquor. Harry is truly being punished as we speak.” Dumbledore smiled at her, his eyes twinkling wildly.

“I’ll try to remember that.” Hermione smiled back at him with a blush before giving him a slight bow. “Thank you Professor.”

Dumbledore smiled as Hermione returned to Neville’s side, obviously explaining every thing to the boy who was now making several different styles of surprised face.



“They are adorable. All three of them.” Dumbledore chuckled as he watched Hermione and Neville leave breakfast, obviously sneaking food out. “No Minnie, sit down. Let them go to him.” Dumbledore stated as Minerva began to stand.

“What? Why? They are sneaking food out of the hall.” Minerva scowled as she gave an exasperated look to the Headmaster.

“Well, we both know where it is going. I think turning the other cheek is all right in this instance. A Prefect should know best.” Dumbledore twinkled as McGonagall ground her teeth.

“I said I would not give them preferential treatment Albus.”

“Oh do shut up. You are as bad as I am!” Snape scowled as he leant forward over his plate to make eye contact with McGonagall. “Really, I saw what you did to Ms. Granger. She looked up to you, and you are pushing her away. You’re a Gryffindor, not a Slytherin, why don’t you grow up a little?”

McGonagall looked a lot like a fish as her mouth moved, but no words came out. Her eyes glittering in both shock and offense as Snape gave her a smug look.

“Ohhhhh Snape!” Dumbledore exclaimed as he leant back in his seat, his eyes twinkling and a grin tugging his beard upwards as he chuckled at the two teachers.



“Harry?” Hermione spoke softly as she entered his room, which was very dark. “Are you awake?” She whispered.

A groan from the vicinity of Harry’s bed informed her that he was awake, but was not in the best of health.

“Hey buddy, we brought you food.” Neville whispered as they entered the room fully, making their way towards the bed. “You ok man?”

Another groan from the bed echoed through the room at the idea of food.

“You look terrible.” Hermione chuckled as she sat down on the edge of the bed, reaching out to stroke Harry’s cheek. “What happened to your hair?” She questioned as she withdrew her hand, ashy black charred hair sticking to her fingertips.

“Dwagons.” Harry whimpered as he squeezed his eyes shut in pain. “Hurts ta talk.”

“Dragons?” Hermione inquired incredulously. “Is that a drink or something Neville?” She inquired as Neville simply shrugged in reply.

Harry snorted then grimaced as he curled up into a ball, attempting to mold his body to Hermione.

“Dumbledore did say Hagrid doesn’t drink normal drinks. Right?” Neville smiled softly at Hermione who had returned to stroking Harry’s head.

“I guess you are right.” Hermione nodded before standing. “Harry, we are leaving you some fruits and bread on the night stand. We have to get to class, or we will be late. I love you.”

“Blugh ber boo.” Harry groaned as he placed the covers over his head.



“Mr. Potter?” Tonks scowled as she peered at her role sheet. “Is Mr. Potter here?”

“No Professor. He is sick right now.” Hermione spoke up. “He had detention last night…”

“Yes yes. I all ready heard.” Tonks huffed as she marked her roster. “Well, I think Harry will regret missing this class.”

Hermione realized, if Harry were to regret missing this class, it would be up too her to pay extra attention so that they could discuss it later. It was a sound idea, and Hermione withdrew an extra quill and paper that she quickly enchanted to copy down any thing the Professor was to say.

“Today, I desire someone to inform me. What is the most powerful and dangerous magickal creature in the world? What creature can be found in almost all cultures, including muggle, and is found on several game preserves?” Professor Tonks questioned as several students raised their hands. Hermione included.

“Mr. Finnigan?” Tonks called.

“The sphinx?”

“No. LongBottom?”

“The Crumplehorned snorkack?”

“No. Five points from Gryffindor for being a smart ass.” Tonks scowled as the classroom erupted into laughter. “Ms. Granger? I trust you know the answer.”

“The Dragon?”

“Correct. Five points to Gryffindor, I hope you are thankful LongBottom.” Tonks huffed as she pointed her wand at the black board behind her, causing several page numbers to appear.

“Professor?” Hermione called as she thrust her hand into the air.

“Yes Ms. Granger?”

“What is the most dangerous dragon species?” Hermione inquired as she placed her quill upon parchment.

“That is a subjective question. I would be afraid to be trapped in a room of fine china with a fairy dragon, as much as I would fear facing the Hungarian Horntail in mortal combat.” Tonks explained as Hermione scratched furiously at her parchment. “It is accepted with most Dragon trainers, that the Hungarian Horntail is the most vicious of Dragon species.”

“But is it the most dangerous?” Hermione pressed as she exchanged her parchment for a clean sheet.

“No, there are dragons who breathe poisonous gas and have more venomous bites then a Basilisk. The Hungarian Horntail is the least rare, of the most ill tempered beasts you will ever face. You have a better chance of facing a Horntail down in your own garden, than you do of running into a Peruvian Vipertooth at a reserve.”

“Thank you Professor.” Hermione breathed as she opened her book, the sound of her quill scribbling furiously blending in with the rest of the classroom’s discussion.

“Today, we will discuss defense against dragons and other large magickally resistant creatures. What some of you may or may not know is that the hide of Dragons is resistant to most any spell that a wizard can cast. There are even rumors of Unforgivable curses bouncing harmlessly off of the shell like skin of some older Dragons.” Tonks continued, her eyes dancing merrily as Hermione bit her lip pensively, the cogs in her mind spinning furiously.

“There are a handful of spells that can be used by the caretakers of Dragons to herd or distract them. We shall discuss these spells today.” Tonks smiled as she pointed at one of the page numbers visible on the board. “Turn to that page, and read. We will then discuss.”



Sirius Black was not one to be cool headed. He had never been known for being laid back, or unexcitable. So it came as no surprise to Remus Lupin when the door to the kitchen was practically peeled off of its hinges.

“REMUS!” Sirius shouted as he clutched the wizarding newspaper in his hands. “Remus! Harry is! He is! AHHHH!”

“What is wrong with you?” Remus Lupin breathed as he reached out to take the paper from Sirius. “Is it bad?”

“He is going to compete in the Tri-Wizard tournament!” Sirius finally breathed as he panted for breath. “Harry is competing for five thousand galleons, and he is going to have to do all sorts of crazy shit!”

“That doesn’t sound like Harry at all. Five thousand galleons is pocket change to that guy.” Remus spoke as he scratched his chin. “Do you think he can do this?”

“Fuck ya! Harry can do any thing!” Sirius gushed as he sat at the table. “He is going to take it to the championship, AND he leans to the left!”

“Well, I am surprised he hasn’t told us himself.” Remus continued.

“May be we can ask Dumbledore if we can drop in and surprise him. Flip it on him! We should surprise him once in a while.” Sirius grinned madly as he picked up the paper again to stare at the name Harry Potter sparkling in bright glittery text.

“But it says here, when the first competition is held, we will be attending a major event. That’s a lot of money, that Harry wouldn’t appreciate us missing out on.” Remus chuckled softly as Sirius’s face fell.

“But…”

“Look, now that we know. We will go see him for the second event. Ok?” Remus smiled softly.

“Promise?” Sirius asked, his eyes wide and watery as he poked at the newspaper.

“Promise.”



Harry awoke late in the day, his bladder near bursting. “Fuck.” He groaned as he stumbled towards his bathroom. “My head is killing me. Fucking bitch wouldn’t let us have any of that hang over be gone from the nurse.” He complained to himself as he stubbed a toe on the carpet.

After a few moments of fumbling, Harry was able to eventually begin to relieve himself. “Ahhhh.” He breathed as he steadied himself with one hand against the tank of the toilet, balancing on one foot.

Harry

“AHHHH!” Harry shrieked as the hiss of his name shocked him. “FUCK!” He yelped, as he felt warm fluid land on his foot.

IS something wrong?

“Jeesus! Argh, yuck!” Harry scowled as he wiped his foot on the carpet. “I can’t even piss in peace. Rupert? Is that you?” Harry spoke, alternating between English and Parselmouth.

“Yes, it is I.” Rupert confirmed. “I have returned, because I desire your help.”

“What? My help? What do you need?” Harry questioned as he flushed the toilet and zipped his fly back up.

“Wash your hands.” The snake commanded as Harry scowled.

“I was going to damn it. What did you need help with?” Harry asked as he looked down at the floor at the snake, having begun to wash his hands.

“My girlfriend is stuck, and I need your assistance in helping her.” Rupert explained.

“Oh wow, got a girlfriend all ready? Sure, I’ll help.” Harry smiled as he stretched and yawned.

“Change clothing, and follow me.” The snake commanded as he slithered out of the bathroom, coming to rest near Harry’s shoes. “It will be cold and drafty.” He stated as Harry reached for his robes.



“I’m going to check on Harry during our study period.” Hermione smiled at Neville as she fumbled with her notes. “I have a lot to discuss with him. So much to learn that he missed. To think, Professor Tonks is trying to imply the competitors will be fighting Dragons. Ridiculous.”

“You don’t think they will?” Neville asked as he walked with Hermione towards Harry’s room, having met up with her in the hallways.

“Of course not. It’s obvious that Hagrid and Harry partook in a flaming drink.” Hermione chuckled. “No one in their right mind would make Harry or the other students fight dragons!”



Meanwhile-

Albus Dumbledore grinned to himself as he withdrew a small aerosol can from within his robe. “I love you.” He spoke softly as he petted the can with a free hand. “I do. I do. I do ooo.” The sound of air escaping from the can echoed through the room as Dumbledore tilted his head back and sprayed the cheese into his mouth. “A most wonderful muggle invention.” He laughed as he wiped at his lips with his robe.



Back with Hermione-



“The Headmaster would never do any thing crazy like that.” Hermione stated as she gave a pointed look to Neville. “It’s obviously a ruse to worry Harry and the other competitors.”

“Oh. Yea, huh?” Neville smiled as he ran his fingers through his hair. “I guess you are right. Why WOULD they make them fight dragons? That would be insane! Someone could be hurt or… killed…” Neville replied, his voice dropping in pitch as he reached his final conclusion.

“Killed… right… like in the last competition…” Hermione replied as she stopped walking. “Oh GOD! What if they aren’t fooling around?” She shrieked as she turned to Neville. “Harry could be in terrible danger. He can’t fight a dragon!”

“Come on Hermione.” Neville spoke. “Let’s get to him and ask him if he knows what is going on. If any one would know if Dragons were around, it would have been Hagrid. May be they talked about it last night or something.”

“Ok.” Hermione replied, their steps echoing down the hall as they hurried towards Harry’s dorm. “There isn’t much time left before the first task!”



“HOLY SHIT THAT IS A BIGFUCKING SNAKE!” Harry screamed as felt his entire body tense in fear. “You didn’t tell me your girlfriend was…”

“Was?” Rupert inquired. “Her name is Tsarina. She needs your help.”

“Well what do I do?” Harry asked as he forced himself to walk towards the tail of the enormous snake. He realized quickly that the snake had gotten its head stuck in a pipe.

“Use your magick. Perhaps you can grease the pipe?” Rupert asked as he rubbed his tiny body against the enormous snake before them. “She has been trapped within this prison for many years.” He continued to explain as Harry twirled his wand between his fingertips.

“Is she hungry?” Harry asked as he walked slowly towards where the pipe and the snake met.

“I am not.” The loud hiss echoed from within the pipe. “I will not eat you human. I will not eat any human. I am a hunter of spiders, and only a parselmouth can command me to feed upon human flesh.” The snake spoke, easing some of Harry’s fears.

“Well, I am Harry Potter. I’m going to try to grease up the pipe and hopefully you can slither your way back out of that pipe.” Harry smiled as he placed his wand tip against the snake, pressing it into the pipe as best he could. “LUBRICATE!” Harry yelled, stifling a giggle as a pink lotion like fluid began to pour into the pipe.

“That is cold.” Tsarina complained as Harry began to press the wand down her side.

“Is it ok if I climb on top of you, so I can run it down the other side?” Harry yelled as Tsarina fidgeted.

“It is ok.”

“Is that ok with you Rupert?” Harry asked as he turned to the tiny snake.

“It is, but remember. She is mine.” Rupert spoke as he watched on at Harry’s toiling.

It took several passes, and a lot of energy but eventually Harry was able to help Tsarina slither her way back out of the pipe. Harry was astonished at her size, the snake was nearly sixty-five feet long, and in the spots where Harry’s spell had removed some of the dirt, she shimmered like an emerald.

“She’s beautiful.” Harry whistled as he ran a hand down the snake’s side. “Absolutely gorgeous. You did good Rupert, getting a girl like this.”

“Thank you Harry.” Rupert beamed as he rubbed his body against Tsarinas, obviously happy with his mate, as large as she may be. “She makes me very happy.”

“So… How do we get you out of here?” Harry asked as he looked about the room. “That hole in that bathroom I opened isn’t wide enough for you to squeeze through.”

“I made a mistake, when I attempted to exit through this pipe.” Tsarina replied as she slithered her body to reveal a much wider pipe hidden partially submerged beneath water. “It has been many years since any one has spoken to me. I have been very lonely.”

“Well, I am glad Rupert found you. Who locked you down here any ways?” Harry asked, as he began to look about the room. “Did Dumbledore do this?”

“No, a human by the name of Salazaar Slytherin trapped me within this prison. He was a parselmouth as well. I am bound to obey the commands of a parselmouth.” Tsarina explained as she leant down to allow her tongue to flicker over Rupert, her mouth absolutely dwarfing the smaller snake.

“What happens if a parselmouth tells you that you don’t have to obey the commands of other parselmouths?” Harry inquired as he leant against the wall, his leg shaking under the weight of his body, obviously tired from the physical exertion he had performed in helping Tsarina.

“I would be free.” Tsarina spoke.

“Then I command you not to listen to parselmouths. It is your right to decide what you want to do, and I want you to do what is right.” Harry spoke. “Is that good?”

“I… why have you done this for me human?” Tsarina questioned as she cocked her head, a look of surprise etched into her features. “We have only met.”

“I can’t let Rupert and you leave without making sure some ass hat who speaks snake ain’t gonna make you do shit the minute you get out these walls.” Harry laughed. “Rupert and you deserve to be happy. You ain’t ate me either. So I’m gonna go out on a limb, and say, you is down for Rupert, and that is good for me.”

“You are the first human to be kind to a basilisk.” Tsarina spoke. “I owe you my life.”

“You don’t owe me shit. I see dem scars on you, and I just want you to be happy.”

“I received these scars fighting other creatures in combat for my masters amusement.” Tsarina spoke as she lifted her body, revealing even more healed over wounds. “It was what I was raised to do. I can not leave until I repay my debt to you.”

“Well… I have an idea then.” Harry spoke. “Can you take a dragon one last time?”

“Of course!” Tsarina huffed as her large form tensed. “I can defeat any abomination of snake kind. Dragons wish they could be as powerful as I!”

“Well, I’m supposed to fight a dragon… May be if you help me… that could make us even?”

“I would accept this.” Tsarina nodded as she looked down at Rupert. “I will help this human, then we shall raise our family within the forest.”

“I accept this as well. It is our kind’s law.” Rupert nodded before flickering his tongue over one of Tsarina’s scales. “I do not fear for your safety.”