Arianrhod's Vessel

once more we find ourselves back in front of the computer screen, wondering what will happen in the next update of our favorite fics. kind of like a verbal soap opera, isn't it? so i'm back and i'm hoping you are, too. just a note to let you all know that i don't own most of what you see here. only a small portion of this is my own creation. the rest that you recognize and know are from the wonderfully talented j.k. rowling. i'm not stealing, merely borrowing. i'll put them back. i'm also not making money off this. i promise. just a way to pass the time.

also, please note that there will be the beginnings of the previously mentioned sex bits that some people might find questionable or distasteful. if you're one of those people, please don't read any further. you have been warned.

Chapter Eight: Small Victories
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The night was chill and dark, only a small sliver of moon hanging in the sky above her head. Nisha glanced about to ensure that no one spied on her, then she stepped off the front steps and made her way slowly across the thick carpeting of grass. It was wet beneath her bare feet, the dew clinging to the blades soaking into the hem of the nightgown she wore. The dampened cloth clung to her legs as she picked her way carefully across the wide expanse of lawn. She knew she shouldn't be out here. It was cold and she wasn't quite healed, but she couldn't sit in that mausoleum any longer.

Dinner had been far too much of a trial for her. Between what Professor Snape had told her and then what he'd been forced to tell Narcissa, her heart was shattered. They'd spoken of a child that she had never seen. A child she was responsible for giving life to. And her feelings in the matter meant nothing. Neither of the Malfoys knew what she'd gone through to give them what they'd wanted. If she had her way, neither of them ever would. But that didn't make being here any easier. She still knew she should leave, get out and go away while she could so that Lucius couldn't put her through that hell again. But she also knew that Snape had been right earlier. If she managed to disappear again, Lucius would only search for her and find her once more. And there was no way he'd let her out of his sight the next time.

The air was nearly still around her, only a faint breeze blowing to chase the skirts of her nightgown around. It brought chill bumps up on her arms. She hadn't bothered with a robe or shoes. She'd only wanted to escape the deadly silence of the house. She now almost regretted her haste in leaving without being properly attired. But she wasn't about to go back inside for any outer vestments. Her luck would see her running across Lucius and then she would have to explain why she wasn't up in her rooms, resting after the evening meal. It was an encounter that had been hell for her. And it was apparent that Lucius had noticed that something was amiss. When he'd questioned her about her lack of appetite during a break in Narcissa's endless quest for information on her son, she'd told him that it was nothing more than some kind of lingering lassitude that clung to her like a cloak and that a night of rest would see her right as rain. After a few moments of silent contemplation, he'd nodded his head and seemed to accept her answer, though some inner voice had told her not to believe his well crafted guise for a moment. It was obvious he'd suspected something.

Nisha had politely begged off the rest of the meal, simply not up to facing any more of the comments about Draco. Lucius had given it several long moments of consideration before he'd agreed and then stood to escort her to her rooms to sleep. She hadn't wanted to have him near her. She hadn't wanted him to touch her. She knew if he had, she'd have forgotten her resolve. She couldn't have that and she'd tried desperately to come up with some reason to give that would keep him here with his wife. And so she'd been surprised and relieved when Snape had pushed back his chair and silently given her his arm. The two of them had remained quiet as he'd helped her up the stairs, down the hall and to her door. She'd offered him a smile of thanks, a small and plain thing that held more in it than she dared show anyone else. And he'd returned it with a slight lifting of his own lips. Then he'd spun on his heel and walked away. She'd been left wondering why he'd bothered if he hated her.

She moved across the wet grass slowly, feeling the cold sink into her bones so that she was cold for many reasons. She didn't really know where she was going. Only that she needed to go someplace where she could stop thinking, stop being, stop feeling. She wanted to be someplace that would accept her sorrow. She wanted to be somewhere that she could be something other than what she was. She knew what Lucius saw every time he looked at her. And she knew what Narcissa saw. One was so simple it hurt her mind to think on it. The other was so complex that she couldn't seem to make her brain grasp it. She wanted to run as far away as she could and never look back. But she'd tried that once before and it had simply gotten her into more trouble.

Something tall and dark loomed up before her, halting her progress across the lawn. When she looked up, she found the great wall of well manicured hedges before her. Draco's Maze, Lucius had called it. Nisha followed the straight line the tall shrub made until she found the opening that allowed her to enter the pathway inside. Her steps were slow and sure, each one coming down on the circular tiles that bore the image of her dragon on them as if she knew by heart precisely where they'd been laid. That alone showed her the way into the very center of the maze, where the small alcove was located with the bench, ivy and flowers. It smelled as fragrant in the middle of the night as it had earlier that evening. And she felt even more lost now than she had previously when she'd discovered exactly what the maze meant.

Nisha stared about her, small lights shining out from the dark leaves of the bushes. It cast a soft halo of golden illumination out onto the center, where the bench was. She stared at the ground beneath her, noting the large tile beneath the seat that was stamped with the likeness of her dragon. This wasn't Draco's Maze. This was her maze. The dragon, the flowers.... All of it had been a shrine to her. Lucius simply called it Draco's Maze because it would take less explaining that way. She was certain there was no way he'd explain something like that to his wife. Narcissa would never understand. She stared and wondered what it all meant. Her mind turned, trying to discover why Lucius would build a living shrine to her like this. Nothing came to mind that would explain it. At least, there was no explanation she could accept.

Lucius had used her to give his wife a child. He'd played upon her emotions and used her until she felt as if she were little more than an empty husk. She'd been young and impressionable. She'd so easily and stupidly fallen in love with him. She'd walked straight into his trap so that he could give the woman he'd married everything her heart desired. Nisha had been nothing more than a means to an end. And she'd let him do it, too. If she didn't leave, she'd let him do it again. She couldn't let it happen. She simply couldn't. Leaving before had nearly killed her.

As a child of fifteen, Lucius had preyed upon her simple ways and her lack of knowledge. She'd stupidly trusted him with her most precious treasure and he'd used her and thrown her aside. He'd taken everything from her and now he wanted to take more. The emotions washed over her as if it were a tidal wave, rising up to crash down her over head and pull her under their wet thickness in an attempt to drown her. It was all too much. She'd been pushed past her limits today and everything she'd held inside for so many years broke lose as the dam shattered and cracked. It all poured out in a painful sob. Nisha dropped slowly to her knees before the bench, the tears slipping down her cheeks rapidly. She threw herself across the seat of the bench, her face between her arms while she allowed all of the heart wrenching agony bottled up inside to pour out.

Her feelings overwhelmed her and she allowed them to flow out in her tears, in the loud, painful sobs that shook her thin frame. Though she managed to put on a good face in front of everyone else, Lucius Malfoy had unknowingly destroyed her life. It had taken her so very long to put herself back together after having left the manor before. If he succeeded in again doing what it was he wanted to do, there would be no way she could possibly pick up the pieces. A second time would kill her. She had to do everything in her power to resist him. She couldn't go through that pain again.

~*~*~*~*~

Lucius stepped into the clearing and found he had a hard time holding back the sigh of sadness that rose to his lips. Nisha was settled on the cold stone, her torso thrown across the bench while she sobbed into the silent, forgiving embrace of the dark. Her gown was thin and wet, offering very little protection from the elements. Even though her shoulders shook with the force of her sobs, he could see that her limbs shivered with the cold. She was going to catch cold this way and it was really the last thing she needed at the moment. He pulled the cloak from his shoulders, glad he'd bothered to stop for it.

He'd been standing at one of the windows in Draco's room, unable to sleep with the images of Nisha at dinner still running rampant through his head. Even when she'd been a mere fifteen, he'd never seen her cry. And yet tonight, at his dinner table, she'd done just that. She'd cried silently so that no one was the wiser. He couldn't imagine why it was that she felt she needed to cry. The picture of her with her head bowed over the table, her shoulders moving with her quiet sobs, had plagued him so that he hadn't been able to sleep. He'd come to his son's room in hopes of finding peace from the troubled thoughts that kept him awake. Not to mention he'd left his bedchambers to keep from waking Narcissa.

He knew that, had she woken to find him pacing along the edge of the bed, she'd have asked him what prevented him from finding his sleep. He didn't think she'd have taken an answer of nothing. He also didn't think he could quite explain to her what bothered him because he wasn't entirely sure what it was himself. He only knew that something had changed about Nisha over the years. It was something to do with him, he was sure. From the moment she'd woken, she'd acted much differently toward him. He was also starting to think that perhaps Snape had had the right of it when he'd said that what Narcissa had asked of Nisha hadn't been fair to the girl. Something had hurt her badly. Some part of her had irrevocably changed. He could see it in her eyes whenever he looked at her.

Whatever it was that had hurt Nisha so badly was now, in a ghostly way, plaguing Lucius. It was rare that he ever regretted giving in to his wife. He loved her that much. But now he was starting to wonder about the logic in trying for another child. There was no actual guarantee that Nisha could perform the same feat a second time. When Narcissa had become pregant with Draco, neither of them had bothered to stop and ask how. It was possible that Nisha could no longer do such things. But Lucius also knew that, for the love and happiness of his wife, he had to try. Even if it meant destroying Nisha in the process. He was surprised to find that he hated himself for considering hurting one woman because of the other.

The conflict of what he had to do against what he felt he should do where what kept him from finding rest for the night. It was luck that had seen him at the window at that precise moment when he'd seen her. He'd been staring down at nothing in particular when a shadow moved and caught his eye. He'd been able to tell at a glance that it was Nisha walking slowly across the yard. At first, anger had consumed him with the thought that she was trying to once again leave him. But then he'd seen that she'd stopped at the maze for a few moments, then ducked inside. He knew he couldn't simply let her go out there into the dark on her own. He'd gathered a pair of slippers to put on his feet then slipped into a robe so that his bared chest was covered and he'd followed Nisha out into the night.

It was ironic that she'd been drawn into the maze. He'd built it after Draco's birth. In honor and memory of the young woman who'd enabled he and his wife to bring an heir into the world. In honor and memory of the emotions such a slight child had stirred within his jaded heart. For Narcissa's sake, he'd named the maze after their child. The maze didn't belong to Draco, though. It belonged to Nisha. Each and every childhood dream she'd ever shared with him had been poured into the maze. He'd built it for her and he'd wanted to be the one to show it all to her. He'd lost that chance when she'd stumbled upon it earlier with Snape, but he felt he could at least go to her now and try to explain.

All thoughts of doing anything evaporated, though, the moment he'd found her weeping over the bench. It was a truly pitiful sound, as if she were pouring her soul out with the sobs that threatened to shatter her delicate frame into pieces. Again, he was left to wonder what made her so sad. Silently, he strode forward and draped his cloak over her shoulders. She barely lifted her head, but the sounds of crying ceased almost immediately. "Nisha," he knelt next to her, laying a hand upon her shoulder. "What can I do to take this pain away?"

She shook her head, not looking at him. She was silent for a long while before she spoke, leaving him to believe that she didn't plan on it. When her voice came, it was hollow and empty, as if it were dead. As if she'd cried out every last ounce of her spirit. "There's nothing you can do, Lucius."

"Surely you don't mean that, darling," he said gently, reaching out with one hand to lift her head from her arms. She stared at him with a vacant gaze, her eyes devoid of life. It startled him to see her so expressionless. He drew on his imperious manner to disgiuse how shocked her lack of anything left him. "Come along, Nisha. Its too cold out tonight. You'll catch your death if you remain here."

"Better to die than to face what you and your wife have in store for me," she snarled at him even though her voice lacked bite.

"You don't mean that," he repeated, some part of him deep inside afraid that she meant exactly that. "Darling, I'm worried about you. You haven't been yourself lately. I don't wish to see you fall ill once again."

"I'm never going to be well again, Lucius," she told him softly, then glanced to the tiles and barked out a bitter laugh. "I'm never going to be me again. You killed that, you know. Whatever it was about me that made me who I am. You killed it as easily as you throw your magic about. I'm dead inside. I just haven't finished dying yet."

He stared at her a moment, afraid she'd lost her mind completely. But then he saw the anguish swimming in her eyes. She was lost in a storm of pain that kept drowning her. She hadn't gone mad. At least, not yet. But he could see madness looming on the horizon. If she didn't let go of what it was that hurt her so badly, she would surely lose her mind to the emotions that were tearing her apart. He couldn't let that happen. Without another word, he slid one arm under her legs and the other behind her back then easily lifted her up into his arms. She weighed so little. He frowned and cradled her close, even when it felt as if she would fight him.

She remained tense in his grasp for a moment or two, then she heaved out a shaky sigh and settled back against him. He didn't know if she was too tired to fight or if she knew that he had the right of it. Whatever had made her relax, he was grateful for it. He turned away from the bench and started the trek back up the narrow walkways. Nisha lay motionless and light in his embrace, as if she were simply giving over to him because it was the easiest thing to do. Lucius felt his jaw firm up. He wasn't going to allow her to just slip away from him like this. The Nisha he knew was so much stronger than this. She'd survived on the streets as a child, for Merlin's sake. He wouldn't let her stop surviving now.

"I don't know what it is that you think is the matter, but you shall drive that thought from your mind this very moment. Narcissa and I did nothing to you that you didn't allow," he nearly spat the words at her, his tone his most imperious. He couldn't let her know just how frightened he was. The thought that she wanted to leave him was like a knife to his heart and he was almost desperate enough to use whatever means necessary to keep her in his home. She'd been so very much a part of his life when she'd been there the first time. Her leaving had nearly undone him. There was no way he was going to let her go a second time.

"You should have left me in that brothel, Lucius. Better that Roger Finch killed me with cruelty than to come back here and let you do the same with kindness. His would be a quicker death," she replied softly.

"I've no intention of killing you, Nisha. Is it not possible that I simply wished to have your company once more?" he asked her, his tone light and controlled. Under his calm and collected demeanor, though, he was silently stewing. Since the moment she'd woken up, Nisha had been sullen and difficult. Any time he'd attempted to be kind and gentle to her, she'd rebuffed him with harsh words or angry actions. He didn't know what it was that made her act so hatefully and he was at his wit's end with her fit of childish behavior. "Why is it so hard for you to understand that I simply wish to spend time with you? Why do you think I've got ulterior motives? I'm not the monstrous person you wish to make me into."

She said nothing for a long time and he had to wonder if she'd fallen asleep on him. It wasn't until they stepped out of the maze and onto the immaculately done lawn that she shifted in his embrace. He heard her take a deep breath, felt her chest fill and expand with the action. Then she let it all out on a long sigh. "You've never done anything for me without expecting some kind of payment in return. I know how you operate, Lucius. You think I owe you. You think you can buy me with expensive gifts and kind words."

"Damn it all, but you're a stubborn thing," he muttered as if it were a revelation. They were clear of the maze now, already moving across the open space of the lawn. A thin layer of clouds was drifting over the sky above, obscuring the few stars to be seen. The wisps gave off an ominous feeling, hinting at storms to come in a short space of time. The wind blew a little harder and a little colder. Nisha huddled closer to Lucius for warmth, even though she was wrapped in his cloak. He knew it was more a psychological reaction than a physical one. She was almost hopeless when it came to thunder and lightning.

"Why did you name it Draco's maze?" she asked him somewhat hesitantly. He glanced down at the top of her head. She had her face hidden, but he could hear the curiosity in her words. There was something else there, too. But he couldn't yet decipher what it was.

"I think Narcissa would have had problems if I'd called it Nisha's Maze, as I'd intended. I did, afterall, build it for you. As a remembrance of you. It was easier for all involved that I call it Draco's Maze," he told her as he strode toward the house. A faint roll of thunder echoed across the country side, letting them both know that the rain would come swiftly and then linger for a lengthy amount of time. He cast a quick glance to the sky, then hastened his steps slightly.

"I see," she replied, her tone suddenly once more empty. He bit back the frustrated growl that rose to his lips and made an effort to stare straight ahead of him. He was damned tired of her childish reactions to everything he said or did. If she thought everything he'd ever done was borne of the need to use her for gain, she was yet to be surprised. There were things he'd done for her that hadn't happened because he wanted anything from her. Not that she'd ever believe him that point. But still, he knew he would have to try and make her understand.

"Just what the hell do you want from me, Nisha?" he asked her, his voice low so that he could control the anger that threatened to take charge.

"I want you to let me go and never look for me again, Lucius. I want to be left alone to finish what's left of my sad, pathetic life in solitude," she snapped at him. For a moment, he thought he heard sorrow and misery in her tone but then her words came out sounding very hard and he felt he'd been imagining things. "I want you and Narcissa to forget that I ever existed. Be glad with what you have, Lucius. You never know when you'll wake up to find its all a lie."

He nearly snapped out a retort about just how selfish she sounded, but he held his tongue. The thin, wispy clouds had been replaced by thicker, heavier clouds. Thunder that had been, only moments ago, distant now rolled ominously close. He felt her tense in his arms and added a little length to his strides so that they would carry him to the entrance of the manor all the quicker. Once inside, with the door shut behind them, he set her on her feet and pinned her in place with the silver heat of his gaze. "I can't imagine what's wrong with you. But I will tell you that this childish behavior will stop now. Like it or not, you're a guest in my home and you will act as such."

"A guest!? I didn't ask to come here. I didn't ask you to rescue me from that little room above the brothel. I wanted to be left alone! But you can't do that, can you? You can't allow anyone to simply slip away from you! You always have to have the last word," she spat at him. "Well, I'm done with it. I'm done with you and your pompous, overbearing attitude. I want to leave here! I want to go home!"

Lucius stepped back a pace and brought his arms up to cross them over his chest. He stared at her for a minute or two, then his lips twitched up in a smirk. "You want to go home? And just where, pray tell, is that?"

He watched as her eyes widened and pain filled them. He knew it was heartless and cruel, but he had to make her understand that this was the way things were meant to be. Despite anything she thought had happened in their past, she was supposed to be here. With him. Much as he didn't want to hurt her any further, he added one last nail to the coffin. "You have no home, Nisha."

She turned and fled without a word.

~*~

Thunder crashed as Nisha shoved her door closed. It was followed by a quick flash of lightning that lit up the room with bright intensity. Thunder rolled again almost immediately. The storm was right over head. Fear, thick and cloying, choked her as it took hold. She hated storms, hated how easily they made her feel so small and helpless. They had always done so, ever since she could remember. She'd learned how to deal with them as she'd gotten older. But she knew she wouldn't be able to deal with this storm. Not with her emotions as tattered and shredded as they were. Lucius had, in that one simple sentence, stolen every last ounce of her will. Because she knew he was right.

She stood in the center of the room, staring blindly at the wall while tears once more slipped down over her cheeks. She would never, ever get away from him. He would hunt her down for the rest of her long and lonely days. All that mattered was that he made his wife happy. If he crushed anyone else in the process.... She didn't think Lucius cared about anyone but himself. Another crack of thunder filled the room and saw her wrapping her arms more tightly about herself.

"I'm so sorry, darling. I shouldn't have said it. I'm sorry," he spoke next to her ear, his arms wrapping around her from the back to hold her close. She wanted to break away from him, to prove to him that she didn't want or need him. But they'd both know it was a lie. And she knew she wasn't that strong. "I don't know what came over me. You just make me so bloody angry. I said it to be mean and cruel."

Nisha said nothing, merely inched closer to him and drew strength from him.

"Nisha, why do you persist in thinking that I only want you here for what you can do? Is it not possible that I want you here because I simply want you here?" he asked, turning her to face him. She stared up at him with impossibly huge eyes, tears still leaking down over her cheeks. He smiled at her and lifted his thumbs to gently wipe away the droplets of moisture that clung to her skin.

"Because you don't want me," she supplied, her tone telling him perfectly well that its what she believed. She stared up at him, watching as his quicksilver eyes searched her face. A look of what she thought might have been sorrow passed over his features for a brief moment.

"Darling, I've always wanted you," he murmured softly, heat creeping into his eyes and words at the same time. It sent a thrill of desire, along with a warning, through her system.

"Don't call me darling," she whispered, closing her eyes to hide from him what the sound of that word did to her when he spoke it. When he'd sounded as if he'd actually meant it. Once upon a time, many years ago, he'd called her darling just like that and she'd thought he'd meant it. It had destroyed a small part of her to find that he'd never really had. That he'd only used that word to gain her trust so that she would let him do to her what it was he'd wanted. She couldn't allow herself to fall into that trap again. And she would, too, if she listened to his sweet lies.

Another roll of thunder shook the room, followed by a flash of lightning that lit up the shadows behind her eyelids. She felt his hands, the palms warm and topped with long, strong fingers, slide up to cup her face between them. She didn't dare open her eyes but allowed him to tilt her head up and back. She felt her lips purse as if of their own volition. Only a moment later, Lucius laid his own against them and kissed her. The pressure was soft and gentle, as if he were unsure of his welcome. Or as if he were taking a moment to work them back into that place they'd been so long ago. Then she whimpered and everything changed.

His hands left her face and slipped around her shoulders, nearly crushing her to him as his mouth worked over hers with a feverish edge to them that she couldn't recall them ever having before. Against her will, she melted against him. Her arms wrapped around him so that her hands could clutch at his robe and his hair. Even after all the years, it felt as if they'd never left that place that had come naturally to them when in one another's arms.

His body was hot and hard against her own, her curves pressed flat against his masculine planes. She could feel his own desires in the press of his erection, the long thick length of him shoved tightly into her abdomen. The warning she'd heard was little more than a distant echo in the recesses of her brain as the desire she felt for him, had always felt for him, broke free of the walls she'd built up around it and poured forth to drown her in the depths of it. Her wants overcame her better senses and she once again whimpered with need.

A soft, throaty moan of pleasure rolled up and out of her as his tongue slipped past her lips and into her mouth. It softly probed at the moist interior, tasting and testing her all over again. It felt like heaven and she sank further into him even though she knew she shouldn't. He was bringing to life all of the old feelings she thought she'd buried. His kiss was waking her up. Waking all of her up. Everything she'd fought to lay to rest was resurfacing. She knew she should be frightened.

She wasn't.

His tongue pressed deep, reacquainting itself with every square inch of her mouth. She let it roam, let it taste, let it touch and explore. She let him use it to bring back every single thought and feeling he'd ever awoken in her. His hands shifted once more, slipping down her back to find the curve of her ass so that he could cup it and pull her even closer. His mouth left hers, bringing forth a moan of disappointment. But then his lips were pressing her cheek, the line of her jaw, her throat. She tilted her head back and let him trail hot, fiery kisses over her flesh. Her body remembered every single touch and it begged for more.

His nose nudged the edge of her nightgown aside so that he could find more of her shoulder. His lips followed, pressing kisses into her skin. His teeth nipped at her so that waves of desire washed over her and brought chills to the surface. Her mind was blanketed in a cloud of lust and desire and she could only whimper and moan with need when his hands left her backside to trail up over her ribs, his fingers barely grazing her skin through the material of her nightgown. The curve of her breasts fit perfectly in the palm of his hands as he cupped them through the thin cotton gown. His thumbs stroked back and forth over her nipples, bringing them to tight, aching peaks.

"Lucius. Please," she moaned out his name, her hands clutching at his head. Her words were filled with both her desire and her fear. He pulled back to look her in the eye. The need that clouded her eyes was slowly filtering away, leaving behind the deep, liquid fear that ruled her. She watched as he physically put space between them. A small, pained smile twisted his lips up.

They stared at one another across the small space for a moment, completely silent in the near dark of the room. There was a flash of blue brilliance as lightning forked across the sky, then the house shook as thunder once more boomed loudly. Nisha jumped and looked to one of the windows. Even with the curtains fully drawn, she could still see the play of lightning as it danced in wicked arcs arcoss the clouded night beyond her window. She shivered slightly. "I miss my dragon," she admitted to him softly.

"You left him behind. Why?" Lucius asked her, lifting one hand up to cradle her cheek. She let him, nuzzling into the touch thankfully.

"Because he belonged here," she replied, shifting her glance to the wall. "With you."

"He was yours, darling. I bought him especially for you," Lucius told her patiently. She shook her head. He didn't understand. She'd had to leave the dragon behind because it had been a tie, a link, to him. She hadn't dared take that with her.

"Its in the past. It doesn't matter now," she said and glanced at the bed.

"If you had him, you'd be able to sleep. I know how much help he was to you when you were frightened," Lucius smiled at her. She nodded and heaved a sigh. It would be some time before this storm blew over and she knew she wouldn't be able to sleep until then. "Well, since he isn't available, you shall have to make due with me. If you'll allow it, that is."

"I don't know that that's such a good idea, Lucius," her words were hesitant. "You and I..... "

"I promise you, Nisha," he vowed, laying his free hand over his heart while he continued to stare at her. "I will not lay a single hand on you unless its what you wish. I will only lay in bed with you and hold you so that you may sleep. Nothing more. I would never force you to do anything you didn't wish to do, darling. You should know that by now."

She hated to admit it, but it was true. The last time she'd been here, Lucius hadn't actually made her do anything. He'd asked her and she'd done it because she'd loved him and it had been what he'd wanted. She wished that he hadn't so rationally pointed that out. She could have sent him away without feeling any guilt or remorse if he hadn't told her that. Now, if she sent him away, she knew she wouldn't be able to sleep and she'd feel rotten because he'd offered to help her and she'd turned him down. She sighed and glanced at the bed. It looked so very inviting.

"Let me hold you while you sleep. I promise I shall do nothing else. I only wish to lay next to you and protect you from the storm raging outside," Lucius intoned, his words soft and full of persuasion. Nisha could already feel her resolve crumbling.

"Why?" she asked, not really expecting an answer from him.

"Because, Nisha," Lucius said gently, moving closer to cup her face in both hands. "I love you."

She stared up at him for a very long time. She wanted to believe him. She wanted to think that there was truth shining down at her from out of his eyes. That truth rang in his voice. But she knew better. Lucius Malfoy didn't know how to love. It would be so easy to believe him, though. To allow herself the luxury of taking his words as the ultimate truth. She just couldn't.

She knew that, if he truly did love her, it would make things that much simpler and that much harder. She didn't want to know the truth of the matter. Not now. Not after everything she'd lost. It was better for her to think that he had never really cared for her. She could stay angry and sane with that thought. She could go on if she kept believing that Lucius had never loved her. "Let me hold you while you sleep," he whispered, leaning forward to press a kiss to the corner of her eye, forcing her to close them a moment. His lips were soft as silk and she could smell the lingering scent of his cologne as it clung to his skin.

"Very well," she agreed and could have kicked herself for the way her voice shook. When she finally looked up at him, he was smiling at her. She must have looked apprehensive, because he brought a hand up and laid it over his chest where his heart beat beneath the skin.

"I will leave my clothes on and will not attempt to remove yours. I promise your rest will be peaceful and uninterrupted," he made the oath solemnly, only a slight touch of humor in his words. Nisha managed to smile at him, his words helping to relax her.

"Thank you, Lucius," she said, letting him know that she appreciated both his words and intent. She turned and moved for the bed, forcing him to let go of her. She slipped back up on to the mattress, tucking her cold feet between the sheets. She watched as Lucius undid the belt on his robe, shrugged it off his shoulders and carefully folded it before he set it on the seat of a chair. Then he moved toward the bed and climbed in, leaving his slippers on the floor beside it. He tugged the blankets up into place over them both, slipped his arms around her body and drew her close to him. Nisha heaved a sigh of contentment and snuggled further into the warmth his flesh offered her.

She drifted off to sleep curled up in Lucius' strong arms while the storm raged outside.

~*~*~*~*~

Narcissa was at the table when Lucius finally stepped into the breakfast room. The curtains were drawn against the gray that still painted the sky beyond the window panes. There was no more thunder or lightning, but rain still pounded steadily on the roof of the manor house with no signs of stopping. Despite the dismal atmosphere, Narcissa was resplendant in a shimmering gown of silver satin that brought out the color in her hair and accented the porcelain of her skin. She looked up at him and frowned. "Just where were you all last night, Lucius?"

"I had trouble sleeping, so I went to my study to read. I fell asleep in the chair. I'm sorry, dear. I didn't know you'd miss me," he told her as he moved to take his seat. She watched him as he did so, following his hands as he poured himself a cup of coffee and placed two freshly baked muffins on his plate.

"It was storming last night, Lucius," she pointed out. He looked at her, a perfectly blank expression on his a face.

"Yes, it was. What of it?" he asked her, his tone patient and the kind one used with a child when they were misbehaving.

"Nisha is afraid of storms," she returned in the same patient voice.

"And this concerns me because?" he asked. When she said nothing, her accusation plain to see on her face, he went on. "Nisha is a grown woman. And, if you hadn't noticed, she dislikes me and everything I stand for. Why would I go to a woman who can't stand me?"

"You've always had a soft spot for her," Narcissa pouted. He sighed and barely avoided rolling his eyes at her suddenly childish behavior.

"I can assure you that the only reason Nisha is here is because you wish her to be," his voice was pitched low, so that she wouldn't hear the lie in it. He'd lain awake for a very long time the night before, his arms curled tightly around Nisha as she'd slept. It had been such a joy and a complete torture to lay there and simply hold her. To not touch her as he was wont to do. He'd spent many a night awake in bed with his wife, cursing himself for being unable to forget a child with the body of a woman who'd run away and taken his heart with her. Part of him wished that he could do that every night, that he could lay and hold her so close to his body all night long. That he'd never entered into marriage with Narcissa.

He knew that, had things been different, he would have married Nisha. He would have waited until she was old enough and he would have married her. Made her his own. It wasn't that he didn't love Narcissa. He did. But he loved Nisha too and that put him in the middle of a very big fight with himself. Part of him wished so fervently that Nisha had given birth to Draco instead of Narcissa. Narcissa loved their son and did what ever she could for him, but she spoiled him so that he felt he was far superior to one and all. It wasn't that he minded the attitude, but it got him into tight spots and bits of trouble in school. If Severus weren't a family friend, Draco would face much more punishment than he did.

Nisha would have been the kind of mother every child wished they had. The kind of mother he'd wished he'd had as a child. She would have spoiled him, Lucius was sure. She would have indulged their son and she would have loved him, just as Narcissa did. But she would have tempered that love and indulgence with boundaries and limits. She would have ensured that her child were well mannered and well behaved. Spoiled, yet not. Loved and loving. The kind of child that any man would be proud to call son.

But the Fates had dealt a different hand to them both. Even if she felt nothing for him, Lucius knew he would always have a special place in his heart for their stolen moments together. Heaving a sigh as he slipped from his thoughts, he leveled a disdainful look at Narcissa. "Jealousy is unbecoming of you, my dear. Why on earth should I wish to leave the warmth of our marriage bed for the cold one of a mistress?"

"You did it once before," she pointed out, now pouting openly. He rolled his eyes at her this time and carefully set his cup of coffee down. Greatful that he'd cast a light sleeping spell over Nisha this morning, concerned when he'd woken and found that she still looked very tired, he snorted in disgust and spoke to his wife in deceptively mild tones.

"In case you've forgotten, Narcissa, I went to her bed before because I was doing my best to get you the one thing you wanted most in the world. A child. It had nothing to do with Nisha herself. She was merely a tool to get you pregnant. And it worked. Now I think you should be just that much more appreciative now as I've managed to find her back so that you can once more have a child," he spat out the words in a low, menacing voice. "It is beyond even your blonde head to so openly accuse me of carrying on an affair in our own home. With a child, no less. If you cannot contain your jealousy over this, I'll simply send Nisha away and you will content yourself with Draco."

For a moment, Narcissa simply stared at him. Then a stricken look crept across her face and he could have kicked himself for being so harsh. But he'd seen how Narcissa had treated Nisha before when she'd thought that he was carrying on an affair with the girl. He refused to allow her to be that cruel to a woman who had once gotten her pregnant and could likely do so again. He watched as Narcissa retreated to her breakfast, leaving the room to silence. He frowned, then reached for the folded copy of The Daily Prophet that rested next to his plate of muffins.

He decided to pass on the front page for the moment and went straight to the business section. He had several interests that he kept an eye on. The Muggles weren't the only ones who had money tied up in unsure ventures. The magical world had its own version of a stock market and Lucius played it as if he had nothing to lose. Of course, given the vast size of the Malfoy fortune, he really didn't. Still, he wanted to check on his investments and see how they were doing.

Shortly after Draco's birth, Lucius had pulled himself out of the bottle of whiskey he'd climbed into because of Nisha's departure with the realization that he needed to focus on something that would challenge him and require that he think. He had gone over every option open to him and had finally decided that he would play the Wizarding version of the stock market. So he'd bought some shares and had, to his delight, found that he had a knack for picking the stocks that would go up and make him even more money than he already had.

He had purchased stock in three different companies. The first one was a small upstart business that made custom portkeys, designed specifically for the individual who bought them. Of course, each portkey was a one of a kind and outrageously expensive. And people were screaming to have one made for them. To actually have the magic transferred into them to make them useful was what made them so disgustingly high. Something to do with a few obscure Ministry laws about trafficking magical items.

The second stock he'd bought was for the only company in Britian that dealt with the harvesting and shipping of dragon's blood for magical usages. It was a high risk job to be a collector and so it made the stock very profitable. Since this company only employed one collector at a time, the price of the blood was astronomical.

His third and final choice had seemed like nothing of consequence. But it had turned out to be a company that produced hexes and curses for large scale use. The company was owned by a few bright individuals who had put their brilliant minds together and come up with a way to create new, fairly bad curses and hexes which they then sold to the more discerning general public for a rather hefty profit. The most wonderful thing about this company was that it was funded in secret by one of the Ministry's smaller departments that wasn't really well known outside the ruling magical body.

Flipping open to the business section, his eyes were caught by an almost completely unexpected headline. He chose to forget his stocks for the moment so that he could concentrate on reading the item of interest. In bold letters across the top of the front page were the words Finch files bankruptcy, businesses for sale.

Behind the open paper, a rather evil and pleased smile spread across Lucius' face. He moved on to the main body of the article and proceeded to read.

Roger Finch, well known businessman and prominent member of the Wizarding community, has announced today that he will be putting his businesses up for sale. At a small press conference, he announced to a those assembled that he planned to retire. "My family comes first and now, given the state of finances with my businesses, I feel its time for me to remove myself from the every day requirements of running several large companies so that I can focus on my wife and children."

Finch, who is the owner of Finch's Follies, one of the largest toy manufacturing companies in the Wizarding World, cited several bad investments and two quarters of disappointing sales as the reasons behind his decision to withdraw from the daily running of his empire. Several other smaller businesses also belong to Finch and have apparently felt the pinch as sales have taken a sudden nosedive.

Lucius skipped over the middle bit, where the article talked about his humble beginnings and how he'd worked himself up into the position of being his own boss. Mention was made of his estimated net worth, a number Lucius scoffed at. He knew the amount was much higher, but that the more legitimate side of the Wizarding business world didn't really know that most of his profits came from the brothel and the associated sex shop that he owned as well. Many believed that he made all of his money entirely from the sale of toys at three locations of Finch's Follies and a few smaller sister shops that were dedicated to selling infant's things.

The last paragraph caught his eye and he read it with a great deal of relish.

It was announced today by Pringlehume and Dirgehurst that an auction will take place to sell of Finch's businesses. The auction will be held at Pringlehume and Dirgehurst's main office in Diagon Alley. It will be a closed auction, with attendence allowed by invitation only.

Lucius folded up the paper and set it aside, a very knowing grin on his face. Narcissa looked up at him and made a slight moue with her mouth. "What has you smiling like that cat that managed to eat the canary?" she asked him curiously.

"Nothing of great importance, my love. If you'll excuse me, I must go and ready myself for the day. I have an early appointment that I must not miss," he told her. Standing, Lucius drained the coffee from his cup, then leaned over to press a kiss to her lips. She managed a smile for him. He stared down at her, a gentle look on his face. "Do try to be kind to Nisha. She feels very much out of place here and you wouldn't want to frighten her off, woudl you?"

"I shall do my best, love," she told him. He nodded at her and then hurried from the room. He had to work fast if he intended to put his plans into motion.

~*~*~*~*~

It was the sound of a House Elf that woke Nisha. She could hear the small creature moving in the bathroom, water splashing into the large basin of the tub. She sat up in bed, glancing to the other pillow. An indentation of Lucius' head remained to let her know she hadn't dreamt last night. His arms had held her all night long, clutching her close to his body so that she could sleep without fear. The storm had long since past and all that remained to let her know that it had ever been was the sound of the rain as it pattered gently on the roof. She slid from the bed and smiled.

"Missy be's awake?" the voice startled her out of her thoughts and she turned to find the little Elf staring at her with wide eyes. "Master Lucius tells Binkie to be's tending to Missy Nisha. Binkie be's running a bath for Missy."

"Thank you, Binkie," she smiled at the Elf and moved to draw back the curtains over the window closest her. It was a dismal gray out that somehow made her feel happy and content. She pressed a hand to the cool pane and watched as water sheeted down its length to splatter against the sill before dripping off. "Erm, Binkie... May I ask you a question?" she turned to look at the Elf as longish fingers worked at pulling a simple gown from the armoire.

"Of course. Missy may ask Binkie anything," she said as she laid the gown of burnt umber silk across the end of the bed. Binkie turned back to the armoire and pulled out a drawer, removing a simple pair of soft lace panties and a matched bra.

"Where's Dobby? I haven't seen him since I've been back here. Did something happen to him?" Nisha asked. She watched as Binkie stilled, then turned to look at Nisha with sad eyes.

"Dobby be's freed of Master Lucius' employ," Binkie told her and Nisha couldn't be sure that she was upset with Dobby's absence or the fact that he'd attained freedom and she hadn't.

"He's free?" Nisha stared for a moment in shock, then a smile crossed her face. "Good. I'm happy for him. He was miserable here."

"If Missy be's ready? Binkie has a bath prepared," the Elf motioned to the open door of the bathroom. Nisha nodded and slowly made her way into the adjoining bath. She smiled the entire time that Binkie helped her from her sullied night dress, watching as the little Elf 'tsked' at the sight of the crusted dirt along the lower hem of the garment. When Nisha was undressed, Binkie hustled her into the bath like a mother fussing over her baby. It took Nisha several attempts to convince the bustling Elf that she could manage the bath in private. Finally, after promising Binkie that she would call for her the moment she climbed from the bath, the Elf was gone and Nisha was left alone to her thoughts.

The water that cradled her body and enveloped her was warm, scented with tea roses and covered with a thick layer of bubbles. Nisha was settled deeply into the liquid, the luxurious bubbles covering the surface and pulled up around her neck like a blanket. It felt good to indulge in such a simple thing as a bath. The tub in the bathroom connected to her bedroom suite was large, with a sunken Roman soaking tub in the center of the floor. There was also a shower stall, separate from the tub and encased in mullioned glass walls that cast sparkles of light and rainbows across the room, even with only dim candle light to work with. It was nearly perfect and only one thing could make it so.

Lucius and his warm body pressed up against hers.

The tub was full and the water rippled around her as Nisha lounged in the deep bowl of her bath. It had been a long day and she was tired, her limbs aching from the unaccustomed activity of horse back riding. Lucius had taken her after having found she'd never ridden a horse before. They'd also stopped in a small clearing on the edge of the forest where he'd conjured them a picnic lunch fit for a queen. She'd been so full that she hadn't been able to help drifting off to sleep. When she'd woken, it was to find that her head was cradled in his lap, his hands idly stroking through the thickness of her hair. There'd been such a heated look in his eyes that it had been all she could do to keep from throwing herself into his arms and begging him to do whatever he wanted to her.

Upon arriving back at the manor, he'd ordered her into the tub to help relax stiff and sore muscles. He'd even been kind enough to help her back up to her room. Dobby had run the water for her, adding in the bubble gum flavored liquid that made mountains of bubbles under the steady stream of water from the spout. And now she was alone, loving the feel of the soft water against her skin while the warmth of it soothed the aches and pains she'd earned.

"I shall have to speak to Dobby about using so much bubble bath the next time," his voice poured over her from the doorway and she turned slowly to look at him. Lucius stood there, clad in the riding trousers he'd put on before they'd left, his while cotton shirt unbuttoned to his waist and hanging wide open to her appraising gaze. His hair was pulled back from his face, tied with a black ribbon and she longed to pull it free so she could run her fingers through the length of his hair. He looked positively breathtaking. She started as she felt a jolt of something so strong that it stole her breath from her lungs. It took her a moment to realize that it was desire. When she did, she brought her eyes back up to his and saw them burning bright silver with his own need.

"I..." she blinked, not sure what she should say. She watched as he took two steps into the bathroom, then reached behind him to negligently shut the door. "Lucius?" she finally asked, her voice high and airy with uncertainty.

"I thought perhaps you could use some company, darling," he told her as he pulled the tails of his shirt from the waist of his trousers. She didn't know what to say to that, so she merely nodded her head and swallowed hard. His hands were now pulling the zip of his trousers down. She could only watched as he slipped the button out of its hole and allowed the black material to slide down his legs and pool at his feet. He wasn't wearing any pants. She swallowed hard and found her eyes riveted to the thick length of his erection as it jutted up out of his groin, a small nest of silvery hair that matched the long strands upon his head curled tightly around the base.

"I promise you that nothing will happen without your consent, darling," he whispered as he took the few remaining steps toward the tub. She nodded again, moving forward in the large basin until there was room for him to climb in behind her. When he was seated in the marble tub, he reached for her and pulled her close to him. Her body was nestled tightly against his, her back against his front. His hands were settled around her waist, halfway between her breasts and her hips. She could feel the length of him caught tightly between them both, nestled between the twin globes of her bottom.
"I hope our ride today didn't tire you out," he said solicitously.

"No," she shook her head, torn between wishing his hand would move to touch her most intimate places and hoping he wouldn't. "The nap helped and the water feels good. A bath was an excellent idea. Thank you for thinking of it."

"Of course, my darling. Anything to ensure that you're able to rise out of bed in the morning," he replied softly. She shivered at the sultry tone of his voice. He leaned forward into her a fraction so that his breath tickled her ear. "Did you enjoy your ride?"

"I did," she nodded breathlessly. Her blood was starting to sing in her veins, demanding that she turn to him and kiss him. Beg him to feed the desire that was building inside of her.

"Would you like to do so again?" his question sounded innocent, but she could hear the undertone of sexual need in them. There was more to his query than there appeared to be. She swallowed hard as she nodded, not sure where her answer would lead them. Seemingly satisfied with her answer, he settled back against the tub and simply held her. One of his fingers began to idly stroke her flesh, making small circles that brought goosebumps to her skin.

It also brought the need to have him inside of her roaring to life just beneath the surface. With a muffled cry, Nisha turned in his arms and stared him in the eyes. "Please, Lucius. I want..." she began, then faltered as she searched for the right words. She wasn't exactly sure what she was asking for. She only knew that in the time she'd been with him, each encounter left her wanting more from him. The first one had awakened her senses to his touch and what it could do to her. And each one after that had only served to enhance those feelings. She knew, in some corner of her mind, that he was working her toward some kind of revelation. She wasn't sure what, though. Not completely.

"What do you want, Nisha?" he drawled lazily, the sound of his voice making her body tighten like the strings on a harp as they were tuned. She felt a quiver slither up and down her spine. His lips were turned up and she could imagine them pressed against her body, against the heated parts of her flesh that had never before been touched. A fever of need spiked, sending a flush of pure desire through her body. He was watching her expectantly, almost as if he knew what the words she wanted to say were and he was waiting for them.

"I... I want..." she stammered, feeling deeply confused. She knew what she did want. But it was wrong. He was married and he loved his wife and.... She paused the churning of her inner turmoil to stare at him. And she knew. She loved him and she wanted him. She wanted what only he could give her. "I want you, Lucius. I want..." she paused and drew a deep breath. Then she stared at him squarely so that he could see the truth of her words in her eyes. "I want you to make love to me, Lucius."

"It would be my deepest pleasure, Nisha," he murmured and then dragged her into him so that his lips could press hers hungrily.

end chapter eight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

special thanks, as always, go out to my posse of friends and fans. they're the ones who encourage me and keep me going. they have my deepest love and respect. much huggles to them all. and extra special thanks to my kitty cat and onyx, because they let me sound stuff off them all the time and suffer through all of the smut before hand.

please excuse any mistakes you may find in here. i'm my own beta so..... please don't shoot me or anything.

finally, if you find you like this, please feel free to leave a little note or something. it is muchly appreciated.

and now, a few thanks.

to Mena: i plan to keep writing so i guess that means you'll have to make good on reading. i'm glad you like the plot and all. i do try.

to Rosei: i'm the best? thanks, but i don't know about that. i hope this chapter lives up to expectations and keep reading.

to Carmen: thank you so much. i do try to write as professionally as i can. given that i'm an amateur, it means alot when people tell me its so well written. and i have every intention of continuing this story. i think i've kind of fallen in love with this idea.