Fallen
Fallen IX
Thanks to
my beta: style='font-size:8.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>BLT,
DPR, Daemon, Maester, Sanity Complex or just Steve.
Slash. Don’t
like, don’t read. More Dark-ish-ness on the way.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Fallen IX
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>~*~
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
Can’t look back
because it hurts
My heart is so cold
I feel the frost
Never look back
I feel the darkness on
my shoulder
The frost is in my
heart
So cold my hair is
frozen
Touching my skin
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>~*~
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Harry closed his eyes. It was true, he did know
his own destiny and the way it had changed, his mother told him. He couldn’t
run away from it, for it would come and haunt him and his lonely heart.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>It was just so hard to accept that destiny had
chosen this path for him instead of the path he used tow anw and the fact that
he couldn’t run. Although his mother did not seem to mind destiny’s choice, but
she seemed to know a lot more than she told him. She told him his destiny in
four words.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Draco is your destiny.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>How could Draco’ve turned into his destiny? He
knew he had this urge to get the boy out of here. Especially after Draco told
him what was going on exactly. The boy was held prison by his own father in his
own house. There could not have been a bigger betrayal. No bigger hurt than not
to be accepted by your own parents, those who’re supposed to be proud of you,
no matter what. He really did feel sorry for Draco.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>But there was this feeling that there was more
about Draco being hestiestiny than just saving the boy...
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>They had to get out of here. This wasn’t a good
place to stay. Not for Draco not for him. Harry turned to his side and saw
Draco lying next to him, sleeping peacefully. It seemed that sleeping was their
number one thing to do, probably because Harry did not sleep much when he was
supposed to sleep and Draco... Draco could sleep any time of the day.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Harry sat up and slipped out of the bed. There
was a plan that had to be made. He grabbed a few of Draco’s drawing papers and
an enormous quill. With a messy handwriting, caused by the enormous quill,
Harry wrote down the main things he had to get ready if they wanted to escape
from this hell hole. A detailed plan would come later.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Harry?” Draco suddenly asked behind him. “What
are you doing?”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Harry’s heart jumped at Draco’s voice. “You
frightened me,” Harry exclaimed
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Well then there must be something to hide,”
Draco answered, looking over Harry’s shoulder.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Harry leaned to the opposite side and watched
Draco read the paper.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“You have the most horrible handwriting! I have
no idea what you just wrote,” Draco exclaimed, grabbing the paper to study it
closely.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Harry rolled his eyes. “It’s because of your
enormous quill, there’s no way anyone can write normally with this thing.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“It’s not a quill to write with. It just looks
beautifully on my desk.” Draco explained. “Now tell me what you wrote.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I’m writing the things we need if we want to
escape-,” Harry whispered softly in Draco’s ear.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Draco’s eyes widened and placed his hand over
Harry’s mouth, before he could continue. “Shush,” Draco whispered. He pulled
Harry with him to his art room and closed the door behind him. “Remember that
the portraits are watching.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Harry could see how nervous and frightened the
boy was.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Do you think they heard?” Draco asked.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I’m sure they didn’t.” Harry assured Draco.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Draco closed his eyes and let out a sigh. He
sat down against the door, while Harry sat next to him. “Let me see what you’re
planning to do.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Well first of all I will need a wand. I was
thinking maybe Libby could get me one, or find my old wand?” Harry said.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I think your old wand was snapped after the
battle. I heard my father mention it.” Draco said.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Oh, well I’ll have to get a new one. Do you
still have your wand?” Harry asked.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Draco shook his head. “No, but I do know what
kind of wood and feather I need.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Good, we’ll ask Libby to get us two. Will she
do that?” Harry asked.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Yes, of course she will. She obeys me, but I’m
not sure if I should let her. When we’re gone, she’ll be killed by my father.”
Draco answered.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Oh and what if we take her with us, or set her
free?” Harry asked.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“That’s a possibility. We could send her to
Hogwarts, like Dobby.” Draco suggested.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Harry smiled. “Good idea. She could inform
Dumbledore about us too. Next thing is a bit more difficult. We have to find a
way to break through the wards around your house. Is there an open place?”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“No, our whole house is unreachable unless you’re
travelling byo, bo, but you will be scanned before you leave or enter. You
won’t be able to go through.” Draco said.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Will your features be scanned?” Harry asked.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I think so. I don’t know for sure. My father
doesn’t tell me everything.” Draco said bitterly.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Well we could give that a shot.” Harry said,
feeling hope return to him.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“The only fireplace is in my father’s office. We’ll
have to make sure he’s not there or coming home and we need his password.” Draco
said. “It’s dangerous.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Not if we are well prepared.” Harry said.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Are you sure you want me to escape with you? I’ll
be nothing but trouble. There’s a much bigger change for you to survive with-,”
Draco asked, speaking quickly.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>But Harry interrupted him. “Draco I want you to
come with me,”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“But I’ll cause nothing but trouble.” Draco
said, shaking his head.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I wouldn’t want to leave you here all alone.” Harry
answered honestly.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“So we’re really going to do this... escaping?”
Draco asked, shaking slightly.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Yes, and it will work. You want to get out of
here, don’t you? You don’t want to stay and live an unhappy life, right?” Harry
grabbed Draco’s hand and squeezed it.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“But what if... my life will not improve when
I’m out there,” Draco whispered.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“You’ll be free! What more do you want?” Harry
exclaimed.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Freedom isn’t everything. Not in the world I
live in. What if I’ll be alone for the rest of my life? Unable to make friends,
because the Death Eaters are still hunting me down?” Draco sighed.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Draco it will not be that way. You will not be
alone!” Harry said firmly.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“And how do you know that?” Draco spat, anger
and fear clearly written in his eyes.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Because if you have to hide, I have to hide
and we’ll be hiding together.” Harry answered.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Draco closed his eyes. “The light side will
help you; they will take care of you. When they find out what I did to you
they’ll kill me. I’m Dark to them, they’ll never accept me.” Draco whispered.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“No. You are not dark. You’re Light- in
Darkness and they will accept you. If it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t have found
my freedom. They wouldn’t have known the truth. If I ended up somewhere else I
would have died. No one would have been there to call me back,” Harry said,
remembering that it was Draco who made him give up his life and that it was
Draco who called him back.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
~*~
I want to feel the
warmth
On my face
Light- In Darkness
Lift me up from here
Give you your wings
To flee from my Ivory
Tower
~*~
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I don’t know. I just don’t want to end up all
alone. It’s funny. Not to long ago, I thought I almost had it all. Now I’ve got
nothing but two choices. Both completely unappealing.” Draco said, shaking his
head.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“At least you will have chances when you come
with me. Here you will be locked in a cage without any choices at all.” Harry
tried to convince Draco.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Draco sighed. “Alright. I’ll come, but you’ll
have to promise me that you won’t let me fall.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I won’t. I promise.” Harry promised, when he
felt Draco’s hesitation he added. “And I never break a promise. You can trust
me on that.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“But you’ll be with all your friends again. You’ll
change and be happy again. You will totally forget about me.” Draco bit his lip.
He knew he sounded childish, but away from this world he had no one. No one but
Harry. Outside this house Harry was the only one he knew.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I will not forget about you. I could never
forget you!” Harry exclaimed.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Why not?” Draco asked surprised.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Because... because I just can’t.” Harry said,
not knowing what to say. He knew the answer, but he didn’t want Draco to know.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Oh.” Draco answered. “Well... ehh...”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Let’s go back to bed,” Harry decided. “We’ll
talk more tomorrow.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Alright.” Draco agreed.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>They both walked back to the bedroom and
crawled into the still warm bed, but neither of them could find their sleep.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Harry?” Draco whispered, when he heard Harry
turn. “Are you awake?”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“No,” Harry joked and turned back to face Draco,
“What is it?”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I’m scared.” Draco whispered.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“For what?” Harry asked. “The dark?”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Hah. Hah. So funny.” Draco said sarcastically.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I know.” Harry stuck out his tongue.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I’m trying to be serious!” Draco exclaimed,
slapping Harry on his arm.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Okay. I’m serious too now.” Harry said,
pulling a straight face.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Draco raised one eyebrow, and then pouted. “Never
mind.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Harry laughed. “Oh don’t be a baby. Tell me
what’s bothering you.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Well... no really, never mind. It sounds
stupid now.” Draco said shyly, turning around.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>But Harry grabbed his shoulder and turned him
back. “I’m scared too.” Harry admitted, speaking softly.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Without thinking Draco moved closer and pulled
Harry into a hug. Which he regretted almost immediately, afraid he’d pushed
Harry away, just when things were going the right way. To his surprise, he felt
Harry’s arms closing around him and it felt good.
Safe.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Harry held him tight. “I understand this is
hard for you, but I will never let you down.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Draco bit his lip. There was something about
Harry he did not understand. The pure goodness in his heart. Harry was to him
the man everybody wanted to be with. He wouldn’t let you down and he would
always be there for you. No matter what. Unfortunately people feared Voldemort
and because Voldemort was after Harry’s head, they feared Harry too, apart from
most of his Gryffindor friends, obviously.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>When they were still in school he could see
that fear in their eyes. Some students even dropped out of Hogwarts. They were
all so scared to be attacked that they didn’t even think clear. To attack
Hogwarts is almost impossible. He used to laugh right in their faces, but now
that he knew what fear was things were different.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Draco could feel Harry’s breath against his
ear, it was soft and calm. His hands were slowly caressing his back, firmly but
gently. He could smell Harry’s scent. In his stomach the butterflies were
flying. He began to breathe quicker when he realised how close he was to Harry.
Really close. More close than before.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Harry used to lock himself away when Draco came
to close. He would be safe inside himself when Draco touched him. Everything
around him would be fading into black. The hurt wouldn’t hurt that much. Harry
was numb then. His memories frozen inside him. Untouchable. He could feel the frost,
his heart was cold. He couldn’t look back to often; the memories would hurt him
to much.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Now that mask was gone, or at least most of it.
Little voices still whispered inside him.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
“What are you doing?
Don’t you remember?”
“What are you doing?
He’ll be laughing in your face.”
“Back away! He’s to
close. Back away! He’ll freeze you again.”
GB
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>And when he realised how close he was, he did
get a bit uncomfortable. Whenremeremembered, his breath would be sucked away.
The room would become to hot to bare. There would always be something to remind
him, to keep him from believing that someone might be there. To free him and
never ever leave him.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>But he couldn’t back away. Was there a place lonelier,
than within him? As much as this was hurting him, he needed this more. Beside
everything that happened to him, there were this other voices inside him. Whispering
other things, things that would hurt him more than the purest physical pain.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
“They’re not missing
you.”
“They’ve forgotten you
long ago.”
normal'>
“There’s no one
missing you.”
“They don’t even try
you you, yet you’d die to be with them. How sad.”
“You will come home,
unwanted. They all think you’re better of dead, and now you walk back into
their homes. You should stay away.”
“You’re All Alone.
When will you realise that? There is no one missing you!”
“Isn’t someone missing
me?”
“Harry?”
“What Harry...”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Harry!” Draco’s voice snapped Harry away from
his thoughts. “What is it?”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Nothing,” Harry lied, looking away.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Nothing isn’t going to cause someone to cry
out with his hands over his ears.” Draco said.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Just some bad thoughts.” Harry whispered.
“Nothing bad. Just some thoughts.”
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Are you sure you’re alright?” Draco asked
concerned.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“I’m fine. Really. Let’s go to sleep.” Harry
said, turning away from Draco.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Draco observed Harry for a few minutes, but
decided not to push. He stared to the stars above him on his magical ceiling.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Harry looked into space, feeling the loss of
Draco’s arms. The blonde’s arms felt strangely good, much better than nothing
at all. He bit his lip, but turned around softly. He saw Draco staring to the
ceiling. Without any words he moved closer and placed his head on Draco’s
shoulder. He could feel Draco’s surprise and his heart stopped a few seconds
when Draco didn’t move. But then Draco’s arms closed around him. The whispering
voices came back, but so did the strange good feeling.
style='mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>
~*~
Oh Solitude,
I can’t stay away from
you
How many times have I
done this
How long will it take
before I see
When will this hole in
my heart be mended
Who now is left alone
but me?
Oh Solitude
Forever me and Forever
you
Oh Solitude
Only you, Only true
Everyone leaves me
stranded
left behind
Can’t you see?
All along it was me
How can you be so
blind
As to see right
through me
Still with me is only
you
~*~
So Sorry
for the shortness of this chapter. It will take another few chapters to finish
this story, because of the shorter chapters. I didn’t want to leave you all
hanging to long.
Songs I
used are:
Frozen –
Within Temptation
Enter –
Within Temptation
Solitude –
Evanescence
And a few hints
of Missing – Evanescence in the whispering voices.
>&nb>