Snape's Obsession

Snape’s Obsession
chapter 7


Valora glanced at the staff table as she walked into the Great Hall. Black eyes watched her as she made her way to the Slytherin table. When she got close enough, she gave Severus a half smile, just in recognition, nothing anyone else would take note of. She sat with her back to Severus, knowing she would be too tempted to stare at him otherwise. Feeling his gaze resting on her again and again.

Valora filled her plate and began eating, too tired to care about the whispered conversations going on around her. She was nearly finished, when a 7th year named Bane piped up to someone behind her.

“What do you want Gryffin-bore ?” Bane said laughing at his own joke. Valora turned to see Charlie behind her. Charlie ignored Bane and leaned down to speak to her. ”I need to talk to you, Valora.” She searched his eyes. He looked serious. Charlie was never serious. She picked up her book bag and followed him out of the hall. They stopped a little away from the main doors. Before she could even speak, he was already talking.

“Valora, I’m so sorry about your father.” Charlie said hugging her. She was caught off guard by his knowledge and his compassion.

“But …. how did you ….?” she stuttered out.

“By Saturday, when no one had seen you since class on Thursday, I went to Dumbledore. I was worried …… I didn’t mean to pry.”

“Charlie, it’s ok. You’re od fod friend.” She said.

“I hope you will still think so. I have to tell you what’s been going on since you left.” Charlie took a deep breath and forged ahead. “You have been missing since Thursday, when you stormed out of class. And when Snape wasn’t around Friday, people began to talk. When he came back Monday morning wearing muggle clothes and carrying an overnight bag…….. Well, that seemed to cinch it in most people’s minds.” Valora felt her face reddening, but whether it was anger or embarrassment she wasn’t sure.

“Cinched what, exactly ?” She said with a steely edge to her voice and eyes. Charlie spoke carefully, seeing her anger rising.

“Rumors were going around saying ……… that you and Snape had gone off on some kind of lover’s weekend. I’m sorry, Valora, I couldn’t ……. I didn’t know if I should tell anyone where you really were.”

“So all of Gryffindor house is talking about me ?”

“Not … just Gryffindor …… I’ve heard people from all houses.” Valora felt her heart plummet.

“I’ve just come back from my father’s funeral and now you tell me everyone thinks …..?” She couldn’t say it.

“I think I have a way to dispel the rumors.” Charlie said quickly. Valora looked at him. “If it were made plain that you were with someone else, the talk about Snape would stop.”

“And who …” Valora started, but knew he meant himself. “Charlie … your sweet, but I can’t let you put yourself up like that.”

“Why not ? You know I like you and I’m sure others can see that. Please let me do this. I know you don’t feel the same way about me, but I want to help.”

Valora looked at Charlie as if with new eyes. She was sure if she had not already been in love with Severus, she might have loved Charlie.

“What should we do ?” She asked.

“I think …….. we should be seen together as much as possible. Holding hands, hugging and ….. kissing.” He looked up. She could see his cheeks and ears were turning red.

Giving him a good long look she finally said “Alright.” Valor had to do whatever she could to fix this problem. The one thing she never wanted to do was hurt Severus’ reputation or put his job in jeopardy. If the rumors continued she would be doing both.

“Can I try a practice run ?” Charlie asked bringing his hand to her chin. His kiss was soft and tentative, not lasting very long. Nice, she thought. But it only made her miss Severus’ kisses more.

Looking up Valora saw a figure in black leaning against the wall, his arms crossed. His black eyes were cold and his jaw set right before he turned and stormed off in a billow of black robes.

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Severus stalked away in a blind fury. ‘That little chit !!’, he thought. She couldn’t come by to see him last night, but she lets that Weasley boy kiss her this morning. He called her every name he could think of, in his mind, and invented some new ones. Damn it !! He knew getting involved with a girl her age had been a mistake. He had opened his heart to her and left himself vulnerable, all the time his mind telling him what an idiot he was being.

Severus glared at his morning class of 1st years. He had given them a rather simple potion to brew, hoping for no mishaps so he could think.

Taking a deep breath, Severus tried to relax. His emotions were a jumble, Valora had that power over him. Why ?, he anguished. Why after the time they had spent together would all allow Weasley such familiarities ? Well that’s it, isn’t it ?, he thought. She had allowed them before, if she didn’t now, the boy might become suspicious. Valora was only protecting them both. That must be it !!

Feeling somewhat better, he stood and walked the aisles. This group of Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs was fairly competent, but that did not keep him from looking over their shoulders waiting for mistakes.

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As Severus came into the Great Hall for the noon meal, he surveyed the Slytherin table looking for Valora. She wasn’t there yet. Taking his usual seat at the staff table, he scowled out at the students, as was custcustom, when his gaze settled upon a head of blazing red hair. Severus was shocked to see Valora sitting next to him at the Gryffindor table. And still more shocked to see the boys arm around her. She had her back to Severus, so he could not see her expression, but she did not appear to be trying to get away.

What the bloody devil is going on here ? Had he been played for such a fool ? Severus knew young girls could be unpredictable, but Valora had seemed so sincere. Maybe he had just been a convenience to her, someone to help her through some bad times. Why would he think she felt anything else ? Because he loved her. But she had never said she loved him. She wanted him, that much was true, but maybe that was just youthful curiosity.

Looking back at the pair, Severus saw Valora kiss Weasley on the cheek. It felt like a knife had been plunged into his heart. He was standing before he realized it and leaving the hall, his lunch untou. H. How could he have been so wrong about Valora ?

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The next couple of days passed much the same. Every time Severus saw Valora she was being fondled or slobbered on by the red headed Gryffindor. Today, they would both be in his afternoon double potions class. Severus steeled himself as best he could. He didn’t want her to see how much she had hurt him.

The class progressed as usual, though he made a point of not looking at Valora. As the class began cleaning up, Severus remembered the assignment Valora needed to make up.

“Miss Whinn, see me after class.” Severus said. When she didn’t answer right away he looked up at her. She looked uncomfortable.

“Yes, Professor.” Valora finally said.

When the rest of the class had gone, she approached his desk, casting a glance back at the open door. Severus bristled at her obvious discomfort at being alone with him.

“Miss Whinn, you will need to make up your uncompleted potion assignment.” Severus said in a very businesslike manner.

“The one that exploded ?” Valora looked almost fearful. Fearful of the potion or fearful of being alone with him ?

“Yes. We will make an appointment for 10:00 Saturday morning.”

“I can’t on Saturday.” She said looking at his desk.

“And what is more important than your school work ?” He said coldly, raising an accusing eyebrow.

“It’s …. a Hogsmeade weekend. I have plans.” She said dully.

“Well…. change your mind. You are good at that !!” Severus said in a low venomous voice. Valora’s head shot up sharply, her pained expression quickly turning to anger.

“What ?” She said incredulously.

“You heard me.” He spat back.

“In your office ! Now !” She hissed through her teeth. When he didn’t move, she pushed him bodily into the office. Closing the door behind them, she took out her wand and put up a silencing charm.

“Exactly what do you think you are doing, Miss Whinn ?”

“What has gotten into you, Severus ?”

“You will address me as Professor Snape.” He said coldly. “You have broken off any familiarities between us.”

“I have …..? What are you playing at ? I’ve done nothing to deserve this treatment.”

“I will treat you as I treat all my students. I should never have done otherwise. You may leave now, Miss Whinn. You will be here at 10:00 on Saturday. I am sure that red ed fed fool can do with out you for half a day.” Severus sat at his desk and started looking through papers, the conversation over as far as he was concerned.

“That’s what this is about, isn’t it ? But ……. I thought you would understand. Charlie and I are doing this for you.”

“I fail to see how letting that boy slobber all over you has any benefit to me !” Severus said raising his voice for the first time.

“Well then you have also failed to hear the rumors going around tchoochool about you and I !!” Valora shouted back.

“What rumors ?” He demanded.

“It seems instead of burying my father, I was off on a romantic tryst with you.”

“But ….. why would they ….?”

“Apparently my storming out of class and your late arrival on Monday were contributing factors.” She said. He looked at her blankly.

“Does it really matter ?” Valora took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “Severus, I never wanted to tarnish your reputation or jeopardize your position. Charlie thought if it looked as though he and I were a couple, the rumors about you would go away. We were doing it for you.” She said turning away from him. He suspected tears were spilling down her cheeks. What a bloody fool he’d been.

“Valora …….. I am sorry. I did not …..” Severus stood and went to her, pulling her into his arms. She was crying, half heartedly trying to pull away from him. He captured her chin and raised her tearstained face up to look at him. He sighed looking into those violet eyes. “I did not know.”

“What really hurts….. is that you thought I could….... I could just walk away from you. You have no faith in me …… or us.” She stepped away from him, wiping her eyes. Taking her wand out again she removed the charm. ” I thought I had made my feelings clear. Obviously you don’t trust me or you don’t care. Either way we had better stay away from one another. I still want to debunk these rumors, so you shouldn’t hold me after class again, at least not without another student present. I will ask Charlie or Mary Ann to come with me Saturday.” She opened the door to leave. “And thank you, for the gift you sent with Harmony.” She looked up at him one last time before leaving. The pain in her eyes nearly ripped his heart out, pain he had caused.

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Sitting on her bed, Valora read the note over again.

‘Please alo alone, aquila puellae. I want to talk to you.’

That was all it said. No signature, so no one, but she would know who had sent it. Valora sighed, folding the note and putting it in her pocket again. She had found the note last night on her bedside table after dinner. Severus had not been in the Great Hall for dinner last night, which she found to be some relief. It was hard enough to sit at the Gryffindor table with Charlie’s arm around her, without knowing Severus was watching.

The words from the note echoed in her mind again. ‘I want to talk to you’, what was there to say ? He thought she was a silly school girl who’s emotions could turn on a knut. Valora closed her eyes and lay back on her bed. She had been trying to see things from his point of view, but couldn’t understand him. She had made love to him, for God’s sake. True her virginity was still intact, but what they had done was making love, all the same. She had given herself body and soul to the man and he acted as if she were a possession to be quibbled over.

Tomorrow she would find out what Severus had to say. Luckily, Valora had felt too guilty to ask Mary Ann or Charlie to give up their Saturday, just to accompany her to the dungeons. Charlie had been really put out, when he learned she couldn’t go to the village. He apparently had big plans for their trip to Hogsmeade. Valora shook her head slightly. Severus had been right about Charlie. Charlie’s affections were becoming a bit over zealous. She really liked him and appreciated his help, but all the pawing and pecking was getting to be a bit much. They would have to continue the act though, at least for another couple of weeks, until the rumor mongers had something new to talk about.


Valora took the note out of her pocket again. Holding it up to her nose, she could smell him. She smiled, remembering how comforting Severus’ scent had been, when she was blind. She also remembered his voice and touch, which had comforted her. Rolling over, Valora buried her face in her pillow to cry, his note still held under her nose.

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Valora went down to the dungeons early on Saturday. Walking into the classroom she saw it was empty. She thought Severus might be in his office. Walking to the door, she was startled to hear his voice coming from the potions room.

“In here, Valora.” He said. At least he was using her given name. She approached the small room and saw Severus stirring a cauldron.

“I have started the base, you will need to prepare and add the last four ingredients.” He said turning to look at her for the first time. Severus’ face remained unreadable, his voice businesslike, but not cold. Valora sighed inwardly, so much for talking, she thought. Opening the ingredients cabinet, she couldn’t help but remember the night they had organized it. They had ended up kissing in front of it that night.

Valora quickly picked out what she needed to complete the potion. She had to wonder why he had started the base. Most of the work for this potion was in preparing the base. The final four ingredients went in one right after the other and while volatile, the end was the easiest part.

Valora went about preparing three of the ingredients, while Severus watched from his stool at the end of the counen sen sen she was through, she looked at him, he nodded. Stirring the potion clockwise Valor added the three dry ingredients slowly, one after the other, then let the potion come to a rest. She picked up the vial of dragon’s blood with a shaky hand, looking briefly at Severus.

“It will be alright. Just add it gently.” He said encouragingly.

The dragon’s blood was what caused the potion to blow up in her face the last time. Just three drops, she said to herself. She adthe the drops slowly, each one making the potion hiss as it went in, but the potion stayed stable. It simply had to simmer now until it turned clear. The process had taken a little over an hour.

“Very good.” Severus said helping her to clean up. The quiet between them was starting to wear on Valora. But Severus had said HE wanted to talk, Valora had already had her say. She sighed as she stood in front of the cabinet, then she felt his hands on her shoulders. Valora held her breath.

“I took the liberty of ordering lunch for us from the kitchens.” He said.

“That was kind. Thank you.” She said. She felt his hands slip away and she turned to follow him.

Severus walked straight through to his private chambers. He had set the little table up in front of the fire again, just like he had done for breakfast not long ago. In the middle of the table was a vase with three ivory colored roses. Valora bent down to smell them, r frr fragrance was soft and understated. She looked up at him.

“They are for you. I thought you would like them.” He said pulling her chair out for her. He ordered roses for me ?, she thought.

“Thank you. They’re lovely.” Valora said, not able to hide her surprise. She looked up at him for some explanation, none seemed forthcoming.

They each started with their soup and ate in silence. When Severus was done, he pushed the bowl aside and laced his fingers together resting his hands on the table and looked at her. Valora set down her glass of juice and waited for him to speak.

“I want to apologize, Valora. I am very sorry to have hurt you.” He said. Valora could tell apologizing did not come easily to him. “You said I did not trust you. I suppose that was accurate, as I do not trust anyone. Dumbledore perhaps, his intentions at least.”

“I didn’t think I was just anyone.” She said with a slight quiver in her voice.

Severus stood, moving to the mantel and roughly running a hand through his hair . “Damn ! I knew I would explain this badly.” He said. “I do not know how to explain this, so you will comprehend.”

Valora might have been insulted by his statement, if he had not looked so lost. She stood and went to him.

“Severus …” She said softly. “Just say it. I will do my best to understand.” He sighed. Taking out his wand, he moved the table and chairs aside. Then taking Valora’s hand, they sat on the sofa facing one another.

“I lived a very different life before I came here to teach. A life I am not proud of. I do not want to explain it all, at least not right now. But one of the lessons I learned from those days was to trust no one. It is a hard lesson to unlearn.”

Valora took all this in, but did not know what to say.

“I had not heard the rumors about us. I do not listen to gossip, especially if it is about me. All I knew was another man was showering you with attention and you did not appear unreceptive.” He stopped speaking and lowered his eyes.

“Having to stay away from you has been one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I missed you.” Valora said taking one of his hands in her own. He looked up scanning her eyes.

“You have ?” Vulnerability showing on his face.

“Yes.” She said smiling. She lifted a hand to his cheek. He closed his eyes, leaning into her hand. “I love you, Severus.”

Severus opened his eyes slowly, raising his head to look into her face. “Are you sure ?\" He asked. She blinked at him. This was not the reaction she had hoped for.

“Yes, I’m sure.” Valora said tightly.

“I am sorry. It is just ……… no one has ever said that to me before.” At his age that seemed impossible. “I do not know what to say.” Valora lowered her head and brought her hands back to her lap, crushed that he did not feel the same.

“I understand. I’d like to go now, if we’re finished.” She said standing up.

“Valora wait. I meant …… I am not a man of words.” He walked over and pulled her into his arms. “I do not have the words to describe the depth of my feelings for you. To merely say I love you is not enough.” Severus was looking down at her with soft searching eyes. He pressed his lips to hers in a gentle, but searing kiss into which he poured all his emotions. Valora returned the kiss trying to put all of her feelings in to it as artfully as he was. Eventually he pulled back, smiling at her. Then he hugged her to him, caressing her back and running his other hand through her hair.

“Ah, aquila puellae, how could you not know how much I love you.” Severus whispered into her hair. She smiled, kissing his neck and ear. Being in his arms seemed so right. The trauma of the last week melted away. He lead her over to the sofa again. They sat together, holding each other and kissing. He never escaladed the kissing towards anything more, but was instead content to look into her eyes and hold her. Valora laid her head on his shoulder and sighed contentedly, happy to be in his arms again.

“You have not been sleeping well, have you ?” Severus asked.

“No. I’ve missed sleeping in your arms.” She said snuggling into him.

“I will give you some sleeping potion before you go. You need some rest.”

“Please don’t send me away. Not now.” She had lifted her head to look at him. He pulled her head back down to his shoulder.

“You will stay here until it is time for dinner. By then Mr. Weasley will be back and will be looking for you.”

“I will have to keep up the charade …….. for another couple of weeks. Can you handle that ?”

“I believe I shall have to. But if he increases his attentions, I will be deducting house points for public lewdness.” He said, making Valora laugh. Severus’ soft sensual hand began stroking her cheek, relaxing her until she fell asleep.

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Severus held Valora against him as he stretched out on the sofa. She had fallen asleep quickly. How could he have doubted her ? Everything in her touch and eyes said she loved him. She loved him !, he marveled. No woman had ever loved him. He had a few relations ove over the years, but none like this. The women he heen een with were merely using him, either for social position or sex it didn’t matter to him. As long as he received the physical pleasures he desired, whatever the woman received mattered little.

Valora had been different from the start. Severus had watched her grow and mature over the years, into the beautiful woman she was now. He had known they could not consummate their relationship, so his emotions had come more into play. His hunger for her building day after day for years.

Aquila puellae, my dark maiden, he thought as he stroked her hair. She was his and his alone. Severus finally felt ready to talk to Dumbledore. He was not going to ask permission to be with Valora, he was going to tell the Headmaster they were together. Whatever Severus needed to do, including resigning to be with her, he would do. But somehow he did not feel it would come to that. Thinking over conversations he had with Dumbledore, the Headmaster had always supported the two being together. Maybe the old wizard knew more than he was letting on. Knowing Dumbledore as he did, the Headmaster may have planned on the two falling in love all along. Severus chuckled to himself. Valora stirred and he hugged her closer, reveling in the closeness he was feeling and sighing contentedly.

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“You go on ahead, Valora. I will be a minute or two behind you.” Severus said as they stood next to the door. They were on their way to the Great Hall for dinner. Severus thought it best for them to go separately and not to walk into dinner together. He leaned down and kissed Valora one last time before opening the door. She smiled at him and slipped out into the hall way.

Severus put on his teaching robes and left his quarters. Almost immediately he heard shouts. Listening closer as he moved more quickly, he heard Valora’s voice.

“CHARLIE ! Bane leave him alone !” She shouted. Severus rounded the corner in time to see Valora whack the much larger Slytherin with her book bag. Bane drew back his fist ready to strike her.

“Immobulous” Severus said, having already drawn his wand on the scene. The large boy froze in his threatening pose. The two other boys released Weasley right before Severus hit them with the same spell. Valora was kneeling over the crumpled Gryffindor, who was trying valiantly to stand up.

“Sit back, boy.” Severus said as he examined the boys injuries. A black eye for sure, a split lip and by the way he was holding his side possibly a cracked rib or two. The boy needed to go to the infirmary. “Can you stand, Mr. Weasley ?”

“Severus, no.” Valora said quickly.

“Miss Whinn, Mr. Weasley needs to be in the infirmary.”

“It’s ok, Valora. I can stand.” The batterey try tried to stand, but was weak. Severus leaned down to assist, but was waved off. He nodded to Valora to try. Weasley let her help pull him up. Severus supported the boy from the other side. After calling a house elf to summon the Headmaster for the Slytherin thugs, the three made their way to the hospital wing.

Poppy mumbled and clucked about end of year brawls as she worked on the injured Gryffindor. Valora stood back shaking and wide eyed. Severus wanted to calm her, but there were several students in the ward, not to mention Poppy.

“You may stay with him, Miss Whinn.” Severus said, placing a hand on her shoulder. She turned her face to him, trying not to cry and nodded. “I must go see to the attackers punishments.”

Severus stalked out, headed to Dumbledore’s office. These thugs were not getting off lightly. Since they were Slytherins, he could see to that. He would also have to explain everything to the Headmaster. Everything. Severus felt this was partially his fault, since the pair were trying to salvage his reputation. It was time Dumbledore knew all.

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Thanks, Glinda




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