Evactuation of the Flumpawumps

Omake 2: A few tips

After perhaps the longest charms class in the history of the world, Luna was getting ready to leave.

She smoothed down her robes and stood carefully; her legs shook from the marathon double charms class. Not that the length of the class had anything to do with her wobbly legs...

Moments after standing, the professor called out to her.

"Miss Lovegood?"

"Y-yes Professor?" she responded, her voice as shaky as her legs.

"If you see Mr. Potter, could you tell him he needs to put some more work into his dissillusionment charm?" Flitwick asked innocently.

A choking noise came from Luna's general direction; namely from under her desk.

"You could also suggest some research into silencing charms." he said, clearly holding back a smile.

"Will do Professor." Luna replied; she too holding back a smile.

"Oh, and ten points to ravenclaw for not causing a scene; it must have taken a great amount of restraint to keep quiet for the whole class." he added with mirth in his eyes.

"You have no idea..."

Omake 3: The Broom Closet Nazi

Ron was roaming the halls; it was his nightly patrol, and he was doing his job to the best of his ability.

In his two years as prefect, he had become something of a legend amongst the upper years.

He was known to all the hormonal teenagers looking to work on their night moves as the 'Broom Closet Nazi'.

It was a muggle thing, so he didn't get the reference.

Ron was a jealous sort of bloke. He wasn't 'getting any', so he made it his personal mission in life to disrupt as many broom closet encounters as he possibly could.

If he couldn't get laid, then no one else could!

No one would be doing the naked happy dance on his watch!

It was a good night for the Nazi; four sexual encounters disrupted. He was only half way through his shift, and he was only two away from his record!

Well, he did catch Pansy three separate times, with thee separate boys no less, perhaps she should only count as one?

Nah, he'd count all three. His previous record had Pansy counted twice after all...

He was on his sixteenth broom closet check when he saw something he'd never thought he'd see.

As he opened the door, Ron saw Luna Lovegood - of all people - sitting on an overturned bucket. Her legs were spread open just enough to fit a head in between, well... the head was pressed right there.

She had her legs squeezed so tightly around the head that it was doubtful that whoever was down there could hear anything at all.

He was about to scold her when he recognized the head.

...Harry?

"Hello Ronald."

"Luna... w-what are –?"

"Oh, harry and I are just exploring the finer points of broom closet etiquette."

"I saw that but..."

"You see, up until this point, Harry and I have kept our encounters away from the broom closets, but I felt that we were missing an essential part of the Hogwarts experience by excluding them."

"Um, well the thing is –"

She took a deep breath through her nose.

"Do you smell that? That's what pine smells like. Its very refreshing, but the smell is not as overpowering as I was led to believe."

"I, err, well..."

"Anyways, as fun as this discussion is, I would like to focus on Harry now; he is doing something very nice for me at the moment and I don't want to appear inattentive or anything. If you would like to chat at a later time, then I'm sure something can be arranged."

"But, you're, um..."

"Goodbye Ronald."

"Um... right. Bye."

In his haste to get out, he slammed the door quite loudly.

Harry lifted his head and looked around quickly; his mouth was wet and dripping with her juices.

"Eh, did I just hear something? What was that noise?" he asked.

"Nothing important, get back to work Harry. We still have eighty-four to go before we have a full set, these broom closets won't christen themselves after all. "

"'K."

He dove right back in.