Light on the Dark Side of Me
folder
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Snape
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
34
Views:
37,509
Reviews:
236
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
1
Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Snape
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
34
Views:
37,509
Reviews:
236
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
1
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Too much information
Title: Light on the Dark Side of Me
Author: cocoa-snape
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Harry Potter belongs exclusively to JKR...she is a goddess. I am making no money from this.
A/N: Everyone has been so overwhelming positive and great - I decided to treat you all with this short chapter right on the heels of the last. Enjoy.
-----------------------------------------------
The Light on the Dark Side of Me
Chapter 7: Too much information
As their Occlumency lesson progressed, Snape was setting an ambitious pace, moving onto increasingly emotional memories for Harry to contend with. Today however, the vivid memory he had latched onto happened to be, to Harry’s horror, one of his recurring fantasies about the man himself.
Harry, propped up against a wall, a veil of black cloth surrounding him. A man’s hands were moving gently all over his body.
‘Oh god no,’ Harry thought, he can’t see this! In just a moment, Snape would see himself and he would know.
The hands that were caressing him had now quickened their pace and were now kneading his flesh urgently.
With deliberate effort, Harry managed to stop the thought from continuing, but he was unable to expel Snape from his mind. He heard Snape’s voice clearly in his mind.
“Who was that you were fantasizing about, Potter?”
“No one.”
“Ah...you don’t want to tell me? Well, no matter, I’m sure I can find out if I just probe a bit harder,” Snape taunted.
“You’re a real jerk you know that?” Harry said in his thoughts, outraged.
“Perhaps I am...but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m still in your mind. No whining Potter, remember? And I must admit, this is too interesting to ignore.”
“Please...”
“If you don’t want me to see, then don’t let me.”
As Harry felt Snape forcing the fantasy to resume, he managed to summon all his strength and will and drove Snape out of his mind.
“Well well...It appears you just need some motivation to produce results, Potter. Perhaps I should resort to such threats more often.”
Harry didn’t know what to say. He felt like he needed to explain what Snape had just seen, “It was just...I was just wondering....it was just some thoughts is all.”
“Yes indeed,” Snape smirked. “It was...quite illuminating, Potter.”
Harry’s curiosity won out over his embarrassment, “What is that supposed to mean?”
“It appears that while in real life you are quite confused about what it is you want, judging from the detail in that fantasy of yours, your mind knows exactly what it wants.”
Silence.
“Who was it, Potter?”
“No one.”
“Oh, it was someone all right. That fantasy was too detailed for it not to be someone specific. I have a good guess,” Snape said, noting the panic in Harry’s eyes. “Someone as unimaginative as you – it’s probably England’s new seeker or some other Quidditch hero,” Snape said with sarcasm.
Harry was relieved at how wrong Snape was, yet he couldn’t help asking the question burning in his mind, “How did you know it was a fantasy and not a real memory? And what did you mean about the detail?”
“Come now, Potter, have you learned nothing? Real memories are clear. Pay attention.”
Without warning, Harry was reliving their earlier conversation word for word, until Snape stopped the memory.
“How do you send someone specific memories like that?” Harry asked, grateful that the conversation had taken an academic turn.
“That’s a lesson for another time and it is beyond your limited abilities at the moment. Back to my point, fantasies or non-real events are...fuzzy, for lack of a better word that you would understand, because the mind focuses on the main event itself, not the surrounded details. Here’s a satisfying example.”
Hermione in Potions class, her hand raised. Snape calling on her. Harry noticed that excluding Snape and Hermione, everything around them was fuzzy, not like a real memory. After Hermione finishes her answer, Snape saying with a satisfied look on his face, “That is completely wrong Ms. Granger. Twenty points from Gryffindor for your stupidity.”
Snape had a faint smirk on his face as though he were still lost in that fantasy. He continued after a moment, “Now, it is often to one’s advantage to invent a memory. The Dark Lord may need to know a specific piece of information that requires him to view a false memory. In the event, intense focus and concentration are required to make a fake memory appear real. Since you possess neither of these things Potter, I doubt your abilities will ever reach such a level, but nonetheless it is useful to know that such things are possible for wizards that possess true talent. In any case, the false memory must be short, 20-30 seconds at the most, because it is impossible to fake detail in anything much longer.”
“Do you do that often? Fake memories?”
“When it is required of me. Of course, it is far easier for me to do so if I am prepared. A prepared memory is easier to pass off as the real thing. Your fantasy, for example, was quite detailed implying that you’ve been thinking about it quite a bit.” Harry blushed. “Replaying something over and over again in one’s mind makes it appear more genuine. Here’s an example you will understand – one of my fantasies,” Snape said, his eyes lighting up.
Harry swallowed hard at the sound of the word fantasies on Snape’s lips.
Harry in Occlumency lessons, standing mere inches away from Snape. Harry whining, “I can’t do it, sir. I just don’t know how.” Snape, stalking up to him and placing his hands on Harry’s neck. He begins squeezing. Harry is gasping for breath.
Once the thought ended, Harry met Snape’s eyes and noticed Snape face smirking in amusement. Harry was not amused.
Harry asked angrily, “What the hell was that about?”
“What’s wrong, does that bother you?” Snape asked in mock surprise.
“Well yeah, maybe you fantasizing about wringing my neck bothers me just a little bit,” Harry said with heavy sarcasm.
Snape stared at Harry for a long minute, scrutinizing him. Yes Potter, I can see why you’re so upset, clearly you would prefer for me to wrap my hands around something else.
Examining Harry’s expression filled face, Snape could scarcely believe what he had just learned – it was a little too much information for him. It was so obvious that he hadn’t needed to resort to Legilimency at all – it was written all over the boy’s face. Annoyed at Harry’s inability to hide something so simple even after all their lessons, Snape decided to toy with Harry a bit.
“I would remind you that you have not been keeping your mind closed during this conversation.”
“What?”
“You have not heeded my repeated warnings about keeping your mind clear at all times and I have been probing you without your knowledge.” Snape reveled in Harry’s look of horror for a moment before continuing, “For instance, I know that you are starving and you are hoping that that elf friend of yours has saved you some treacle tarts from last night’s dinner.”
“Is that all?” Harry asked hopefully.
“Is that not enough? Would you like me to keep looking?” Snape asked with a smirk.
“No.”
“Then you’re dismissed, Potter.”
As Snape watched Harry collect his things and leave his quarters, Snape contemplated this new development.
Over the last six weeks he had come to learn quite a lot of things about Harry Potter. That was bound to happen when you spent endless hours in another’s mind. One of the most surprising things was that Potter hated the fame! Being referred to as the Boy-Who-Lived or the Golden Boy infuriated him and it was his desire to be treated like every other wizard that was the primary reason Potter was so easily irritated and incensed in Potions class. Potter was a brave Gryffindor through and through, but not unexpectedly, he was scared of what lie ahead and his appointed role in the war. Snape had found Potter’s realistic fear of the Dark Lord refreshing, but he was disturbed by the sad fact that Potter felt he had no one to truly confide in, not even his apparent best friends Ron and Hermione. In fact, Potter’s very limited and short-lived relationship with Sirius Black was the only time in his life he had ever felt loved – sort of. Why on earth do you care Severus? He didn’t know why, but Snape was forced to admit the distressing fact that he had come to care for the insolent brat.
Another big shocker, Snape reflected, was that Potter was still a virgin. And his thoughts and fantasies had certainty suggested that Potter liked men. As tedious as it was watching the memories of Potter making out with his supposed girlfriends, it was also quite revealing – he did not like women, at all – even though he was apparently too confused to know that.
But now Snape had stumbled on Potter’s fantasies for him. Fantasies? That’s too strong a word, Severus. He knew it was probably nothing. The pair had been in close proximity for weeks. And now that Potter suspected that he shared his preferences, he had latched onto that commonality and was transferring his new, confusing feelings to the only person he knew shared them. That was perfectly natural and in itself did not worry him in the least. After all, Potter was an adolescent boy – they fantasize about everything that moves. He was not stupid enough to think that Potter actually desired him. What did bother Snape was his own reaction to this revelation. Dare he think it – he was amused – and not in his characteristic sadistic way. Perhaps I should go speak with Albus about this, Snape decided.
---------------------------------
A/N: Please review (don’t forget I eat specifics for dinner).
My latest (and probably accurate) estimate is that this story will be 30 chapters long.
In the next chapter, entitled “Getting to know you,” Harry and Snape bond - sort of. Is it even possible? Or am I just pulling your leg? You must read to find out...
Author: cocoa-snape
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Harry Potter belongs exclusively to JKR...she is a goddess. I am making no money from this.
A/N: Everyone has been so overwhelming positive and great - I decided to treat you all with this short chapter right on the heels of the last. Enjoy.
-----------------------------------------------
The Light on the Dark Side of Me
Chapter 7: Too much information
As their Occlumency lesson progressed, Snape was setting an ambitious pace, moving onto increasingly emotional memories for Harry to contend with. Today however, the vivid memory he had latched onto happened to be, to Harry’s horror, one of his recurring fantasies about the man himself.
Harry, propped up against a wall, a veil of black cloth surrounding him. A man’s hands were moving gently all over his body.
‘Oh god no,’ Harry thought, he can’t see this! In just a moment, Snape would see himself and he would know.
The hands that were caressing him had now quickened their pace and were now kneading his flesh urgently.
With deliberate effort, Harry managed to stop the thought from continuing, but he was unable to expel Snape from his mind. He heard Snape’s voice clearly in his mind.
“Who was that you were fantasizing about, Potter?”
“No one.”
“Ah...you don’t want to tell me? Well, no matter, I’m sure I can find out if I just probe a bit harder,” Snape taunted.
“You’re a real jerk you know that?” Harry said in his thoughts, outraged.
“Perhaps I am...but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m still in your mind. No whining Potter, remember? And I must admit, this is too interesting to ignore.”
“Please...”
“If you don’t want me to see, then don’t let me.”
As Harry felt Snape forcing the fantasy to resume, he managed to summon all his strength and will and drove Snape out of his mind.
“Well well...It appears you just need some motivation to produce results, Potter. Perhaps I should resort to such threats more often.”
Harry didn’t know what to say. He felt like he needed to explain what Snape had just seen, “It was just...I was just wondering....it was just some thoughts is all.”
“Yes indeed,” Snape smirked. “It was...quite illuminating, Potter.”
Harry’s curiosity won out over his embarrassment, “What is that supposed to mean?”
“It appears that while in real life you are quite confused about what it is you want, judging from the detail in that fantasy of yours, your mind knows exactly what it wants.”
Silence.
“Who was it, Potter?”
“No one.”
“Oh, it was someone all right. That fantasy was too detailed for it not to be someone specific. I have a good guess,” Snape said, noting the panic in Harry’s eyes. “Someone as unimaginative as you – it’s probably England’s new seeker or some other Quidditch hero,” Snape said with sarcasm.
Harry was relieved at how wrong Snape was, yet he couldn’t help asking the question burning in his mind, “How did you know it was a fantasy and not a real memory? And what did you mean about the detail?”
“Come now, Potter, have you learned nothing? Real memories are clear. Pay attention.”
Without warning, Harry was reliving their earlier conversation word for word, until Snape stopped the memory.
“How do you send someone specific memories like that?” Harry asked, grateful that the conversation had taken an academic turn.
“That’s a lesson for another time and it is beyond your limited abilities at the moment. Back to my point, fantasies or non-real events are...fuzzy, for lack of a better word that you would understand, because the mind focuses on the main event itself, not the surrounded details. Here’s a satisfying example.”
Hermione in Potions class, her hand raised. Snape calling on her. Harry noticed that excluding Snape and Hermione, everything around them was fuzzy, not like a real memory. After Hermione finishes her answer, Snape saying with a satisfied look on his face, “That is completely wrong Ms. Granger. Twenty points from Gryffindor for your stupidity.”
Snape had a faint smirk on his face as though he were still lost in that fantasy. He continued after a moment, “Now, it is often to one’s advantage to invent a memory. The Dark Lord may need to know a specific piece of information that requires him to view a false memory. In the event, intense focus and concentration are required to make a fake memory appear real. Since you possess neither of these things Potter, I doubt your abilities will ever reach such a level, but nonetheless it is useful to know that such things are possible for wizards that possess true talent. In any case, the false memory must be short, 20-30 seconds at the most, because it is impossible to fake detail in anything much longer.”
“Do you do that often? Fake memories?”
“When it is required of me. Of course, it is far easier for me to do so if I am prepared. A prepared memory is easier to pass off as the real thing. Your fantasy, for example, was quite detailed implying that you’ve been thinking about it quite a bit.” Harry blushed. “Replaying something over and over again in one’s mind makes it appear more genuine. Here’s an example you will understand – one of my fantasies,” Snape said, his eyes lighting up.
Harry swallowed hard at the sound of the word fantasies on Snape’s lips.
Harry in Occlumency lessons, standing mere inches away from Snape. Harry whining, “I can’t do it, sir. I just don’t know how.” Snape, stalking up to him and placing his hands on Harry’s neck. He begins squeezing. Harry is gasping for breath.
Once the thought ended, Harry met Snape’s eyes and noticed Snape face smirking in amusement. Harry was not amused.
Harry asked angrily, “What the hell was that about?”
“What’s wrong, does that bother you?” Snape asked in mock surprise.
“Well yeah, maybe you fantasizing about wringing my neck bothers me just a little bit,” Harry said with heavy sarcasm.
Snape stared at Harry for a long minute, scrutinizing him. Yes Potter, I can see why you’re so upset, clearly you would prefer for me to wrap my hands around something else.
Examining Harry’s expression filled face, Snape could scarcely believe what he had just learned – it was a little too much information for him. It was so obvious that he hadn’t needed to resort to Legilimency at all – it was written all over the boy’s face. Annoyed at Harry’s inability to hide something so simple even after all their lessons, Snape decided to toy with Harry a bit.
“I would remind you that you have not been keeping your mind closed during this conversation.”
“What?”
“You have not heeded my repeated warnings about keeping your mind clear at all times and I have been probing you without your knowledge.” Snape reveled in Harry’s look of horror for a moment before continuing, “For instance, I know that you are starving and you are hoping that that elf friend of yours has saved you some treacle tarts from last night’s dinner.”
“Is that all?” Harry asked hopefully.
“Is that not enough? Would you like me to keep looking?” Snape asked with a smirk.
“No.”
“Then you’re dismissed, Potter.”
As Snape watched Harry collect his things and leave his quarters, Snape contemplated this new development.
Over the last six weeks he had come to learn quite a lot of things about Harry Potter. That was bound to happen when you spent endless hours in another’s mind. One of the most surprising things was that Potter hated the fame! Being referred to as the Boy-Who-Lived or the Golden Boy infuriated him and it was his desire to be treated like every other wizard that was the primary reason Potter was so easily irritated and incensed in Potions class. Potter was a brave Gryffindor through and through, but not unexpectedly, he was scared of what lie ahead and his appointed role in the war. Snape had found Potter’s realistic fear of the Dark Lord refreshing, but he was disturbed by the sad fact that Potter felt he had no one to truly confide in, not even his apparent best friends Ron and Hermione. In fact, Potter’s very limited and short-lived relationship with Sirius Black was the only time in his life he had ever felt loved – sort of. Why on earth do you care Severus? He didn’t know why, but Snape was forced to admit the distressing fact that he had come to care for the insolent brat.
Another big shocker, Snape reflected, was that Potter was still a virgin. And his thoughts and fantasies had certainty suggested that Potter liked men. As tedious as it was watching the memories of Potter making out with his supposed girlfriends, it was also quite revealing – he did not like women, at all – even though he was apparently too confused to know that.
But now Snape had stumbled on Potter’s fantasies for him. Fantasies? That’s too strong a word, Severus. He knew it was probably nothing. The pair had been in close proximity for weeks. And now that Potter suspected that he shared his preferences, he had latched onto that commonality and was transferring his new, confusing feelings to the only person he knew shared them. That was perfectly natural and in itself did not worry him in the least. After all, Potter was an adolescent boy – they fantasize about everything that moves. He was not stupid enough to think that Potter actually desired him. What did bother Snape was his own reaction to this revelation. Dare he think it – he was amused – and not in his characteristic sadistic way. Perhaps I should go speak with Albus about this, Snape decided.
---------------------------------
A/N: Please review (don’t forget I eat specifics for dinner).
My latest (and probably accurate) estimate is that this story will be 30 chapters long.
In the next chapter, entitled “Getting to know you,” Harry and Snape bond - sort of. Is it even possible? Or am I just pulling your leg? You must read to find out...