How To Disappear Completely

Disclaimer: Alas, I don’t own anything.



“Dream On” by Depeche Mode from the album “Exciter” (“Black Metallic” by Catherine Wheel was utilized for this chapter also.)





Chapter 7: Dream On





“There’s no time for hesitating

pain is ready, pain is waiting

primed to do its educating”



“I highly doubt you will be the one to run around at all hours of the night, keeping me awake and what not. As do I doubt that you will leave your rooms a mess. I expect you to pick up after yourself.” Severus started his speech as soon as the two of them walked into his chambers and gave her a terse tour.



Hermione still didn’t have anything to unpack and was planning on having Ginny go into Hogsmeade and London to do a bit of shopping for her. She had learned a few days earlier that her parents had left her with a hefty sum of money, along with the money from their life insurance policies. While it did trouble her to admit how they died, the muggle police had it labeled on the death certificates that their deaths were caused from a fire that started from an electrical wire mess up. Harry had volunteered to go to sign the final papers since there was still a fear for her safety. He encountered a bit of difficulty, but after receiving a message from Miss Granger, they allowed Harry to handle everything. She told them that she couldn’t travel because of illness. He went to Gringott’s to deposit everything soon after.



While Harry was a bit shocked upon learning of Snape’s offer to take her on as an apprentice, he was happy that she would have something to focus on. Plus, she would be getting paid to for her work that wouldn’t leave Hermione in a potential financial rut. He didn’t question her sudden change of career paths in giving up auror training and joked about how he would have Draco watch to make sure Snape didn’t give her too much crap.



Hermione looked at her former professor, now co-worker, without a sneer that he was almost expecting. In fact, he almost wished he could get a smartass remark instead of just looking at an emotionless face that was devoid of color. She followed him around as he showed her where everything was.



“Your room is just down this small corridor. It’s spacious enough to where you won’t be claustrophobic, but I ask that you please remember that you are sharing your living quarters and not have that charmed music box Potter gave you blare too loud.”



“That’s what silencing spells are for.” Hermione said quietly.



Severus didn’t reply to her comment, but almost welcomed it. It wasn’t yet fall, but her clothing choices were those of one who was ready for the season in a turtleneck and jeans. While for a second he thought it was because of the rumor of his chambers being colder than a morgue, but when his eyes fell on the long sleeved brown turtleneck, he immediately knew that she was covering up her scars. The necklace she so cherished stood out. He wasn’t used to this Hermione Granger. He even contemplated pushing her buttons to the point where he would get the response he was expecting.



“It’s just a pre-cautionary word - that’s all. There’s no need to pretend that I’m in favor of this particular arrangement.” saying the last words with a particular cruelty.



“Well sorry for being a thorn in your side.” she replied again, without raising her voice while looking at her rooms. She could tell that he must have done some readjustments to it to suit her. There was no way Severus Snape would allow crimson to dominate a room in his chambers.



“Thank you. It looks really... cozy.” Hermione responded.



“I don’t know how you are to acquire new robes, clothes and such.”



“I know Dumbledore doesn’t want me to leave the grounds for fears of another attack. I asked Ginny to go into Hogsmeade and London to purchase some clothes for me. She knows what I like.” Hermione said as she slowly paced her room.



“Well, we have just a few days before the academic year starts and it’ll suit you well to get accustomed to how I like to run the classroom and research.”



It was then that Hermione stopped pacing and looked her former Potions professor straight in the eye and responded, “I’ve been under your tutelage for seven years. I think I’m quiet used to how you run things. It won’t be hard for me to adapt. I thank you for doing this.”



While he could tell that she was truly grateful, her eyes gave him the opposite impression. Eyes that once hungered to see every bit of information were now empty. He could tell she wasn’t getting much sleep, but he told himself that such things were her problem.



Every now and again he swore he’d see her grip onto something, her body still sore from the injuries, but she was never one to ask for assistance. Her independence was a quality he admired, but most would see such behavior as stubbornness.



Severus looked down at his feet, trying to find some distraction from her subtle gaze that had some strange power in it. “If you’ll excuse me, I have some... business to attend to.” he said as he quietly made his exit.



Hermione continued to pace around the room and finally climbed onto the bed out of sheer boredom. It only took a few minutes, but she fell into a soft sleep.



...........................................................................................................



“We know where you are. You can’t hide.”



It was a whisper that sounded all too familiar. She tried to place it, but couldn’t; her vision engulfed only in darkness. The laugh was what gave it all away. She began to panic and then awoke suddenly to see Ginny Weasley placing a new wardrobe in Hermione’s closet and drawers.



“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to wake you up.” she said as she continued to have the clothes fold themselves and fall neatly into the dresser drawer.



“Thank you.”



“It’s no problem.”



“No really. Thank you for doing all of this for me.”



“Hermione, it’s really no problem. It’s nice to go shopping on someone else’s account. You’re going to have to let me borrow some of this stuff though is my only request.”



“Sure.” Hermione said with a slight smile as she got up from the bed. “How long have you been here?”



“Not too long. I’m going to go back to the Burrow for a few days before the new term starts. Do you want to come?”



There was a heavy hesitation in her voice that Ginny immediately picked up on.



“It’s alright. I understand that you might not want to get out. I’ll send Mum and everyone else your love.”



“Thanks Ginny. What time is it?”



“It’s a little after six. Dumbledore invited me to join you all for dinner, but I promised Mum I’d be home before then.”



With that, Ginny gave her friend a hug and said goodbye. Hermione stretched her legs and walked out of her room and down the corridor to the main room in Snape’s chamber. It was quiet in her former Professor’s chambers as she took a second glance at the room. She noticed a massive library built into the wall. It even expanded in the space above his fireplace. Hermione walked towards the books, almost hypnotized by the selection. Her vision glazed over all the titles, as she lightly ran her fingertips over the spines of the books relishing in the feel of the old leather not noticing the door opening and closing.



Severus walked into his chamber and observed his apprentice in awe of his personal library. He didn’t want to interrupt the moment and chose to watch her for a few more seconds.



“I see you’ve found my book collection.”



His voice startled her more than she liked to admit and he, again, regretted doing such a thing.



“I think your collection would intimidate our own library.” Hermione stated. “Would... would it be ok if I borrowed a few of them sometime?” she asked with a hint of timidity in her voice.



“You need not have had to ask.” he said even though he knew that if she would have took it upon herself to borrow one without asking he would fume.



He excused himself and walked into his bedroom while she continued to browse the titles in silence.

..........................................................................................................



“When I was a little girl - I was happy.” It began as a whisper, but the voice of Indra Karstein slowly rose. “He promised me that we would find those responsible. He delivered that promise. How can I not remain loyal? I shall make a new promise. We will find you and finish what we started.”



And with those words Hermione shot up in her bed screaming in utter agony. It took her a few minutes before she could calm down. Days had passed and it was now the night before classes officially began at Hogwart’s. The Sorting Hat ceremony went off without a hitch and while Hermione chose not to watch the spectacle, Ginny told her all of the details. It was mentioned that she was going to be Professor Snape’s apprentice along with the new addition of Draco Malfoy as the DADA instructor.



She began to grow accustomed to the nightmares like clockwork. Madame Pomfrey gave her a batch of dreamless sleeping draught, but as she looked down at the case she hid underneath the bathroom sink, she knew that it would only last her a few more days.



Every morning, at around two, she would wake up and walk into the bathroom, drink a vial, wash her face and see without shock just how much she changed in the past few weeks. She looked tired all of the time - she felt tired all of the time. What energy she once had, she no longer felt the exuberance that once inhabited her body.



She breathed in a sigh of relief at the thought that Snape had been decent to her. They hardly spoke to one another, but she was never in a mood for conversation. Every night it started over again with a scream. Would they ever disappear like she wished she would? There was even a contemplation of using a pensieve, but she knew that it would be the easy way out of things instead of her facing the ultimate fact. After a few more moments of trying to collect her self, she walked out and went back to bed.



Severus Snape lay awake, trying to avoid the urge to run to her room and offer a flicker of comfort. For days she had awoken him with her screams and while it greatly annoyed his time for rest, he was concerned for her.



How could one not be concerned, especially where it concerned him. He saw her body. He retrieved it. Her flesh and its permanent markers of what happened to her. Severus knew that she would never admit out loud what she was really thinking. Hermione Granger was the type to bottle it all up and hope for the best. But he knew it would only take one random incident for her explode. She didn’t want to be seen as weak, and he was sure that she felt guilt because she couldn’t protect her parents. Just when she was supposed to start a new life, all hopes were pulled from underneath her.



And then he thought back to the moment he found her. Brutality that no one should be allowed to commit, he saw. It only made him feel worse, knowing that such time was given for those who violated her to do such things. Maybe if they would have found her a day earlier? Maybe if she wouldn’t have been Potter’s best friend? There were so many maybes, too many.



He would listen keenly and would wait until things quieted down. Even after the silence, he would still lie awake. There were moments he was tempted just to go and check on her, but couldn’t bring himself to do it. He didn’t care if she was having trouble sleeping. As long as it didn’t mess with her work, he wasn’t concerned. That was all he could tell himself. He was afraid to shift too much in his own bed for fear that she would hear him, even though he knew she couldn’t. He listened to the silence until he would eventually give in to rest, angry that while she didn’t use the silencing charms for her rooms, thankful nonetheless for her forgetting to use them.



...........................................................................................................



The first few days were uneventful. Severus introduced Hermione to his students as his apprentice and was to be listened to just as he was. While she didn’t encounter any problems with her students, she still felt a bit odd with her position.



After a few weeks she fell into the swing of things. Her students took to her and while Snape was known for the sternness in his methods of teaching, Hermione was the softer of the two. While there were times she deducted points, she didn’t get as much flack as Snape did.



She fell into the swing of things when it came to grading tests and research papers. She could understand the frustration that Snape had with his first years with some of their stupid mistakes.



“Are they really that stupid?” she asked once out of frustration while the two of them were in his chambers. “I give the simplest of instructions, yet, it’s as if they turn off their brains!”



“Welcome to the club Miss Granger.” Severus said, reviewing over lesson plans for the next day.



Hermione finished marking the paper and decided to call it a night. The circles under her eyes that were there from day one, still stood out and while Severus wanted to say something, he tried to convince himself that he didn’t care.



“I’m going to turn in for the night.” Hermione said, stretching her arms out as she stood up.



“Very well then.” Severus said, knowing that it was pretty early. He watched her walk down the corridor and heard the door close.



She would still wear clothes to cover up her scars. While he didn’t think she picked up on it, he would notice her fingers lightly grazing the area on her neck where her unforgettable scar was. It was as if she were making sure that the wound wouldn’t reopen. If not that, her fingers would linger on the necklace her mother gave her. He liked to think that it was her beacon of strength in some moments. She never did notice his gazes - choosing to focus on her work - just like he knew she would do. She never spoke of what happened to her. He thought that she would pour everything out to her friends, but from what he saw and heard, she never did. It was topic that wasn’t open to discussion. It scared him with the thought that she was a ticking bomb just waiting for the precise moment to explode.





He was lost in thought when all of a sudden he heard a scream and a door open. She ran quickly down the corridor and towards his door leading to the classroom, not even stopping to let him know what was going on. He quickly caught up with her and stopped her just as she reached the door. She was crying, her eyes already red and swollen, while trying to catch her breath.



“What’s wrong?” Severus asked, his hands clutching her shoulders as she sunk down into him. “She only pointed towards her room and trying to find her voice to speak, “They’re back!”



Severus looked towards the room and tried to go, but she clung onto him, desperate. She had become a child, begging for her protector not to abandon her.



“I have to go see. Just stay here.” he whispered, calming her down as his hand unconsciously began to circle on her upper back. He could hear her whispering into his collar, “No more. No more.”



After a few seconds, she let him go reluctantly. He walked towards her room, and slowly opened the door to see a box on her bed. He approached it and picked up the box to see two bloodied fingers, both with wedding bands on them. He gasped at the audacity of the gift and then looked to the floor to see a note in which the words



“Soon.” was written in what appeared to be blood.



Severus stared at the note baffled. How on earth could such a thing get sent to her on basic owl post? He knew that they were her parent’s fingers. So many thoughts were swelling in his head as he picked up the box, trying not to focus on its contents, and walked out of her room.



As he approached her, the box in his hands, slight traces of blood on his own fingers, she backed away from him, placing her hands in the air, trying to stop him until she was against the door. There was a pleading look in her eyes that made his heart stop in its beat for a moment as more tears flowed down her cheeks. She slowly began to slide down the door until she was on the floor, her knees brought up to her chin as her cries continued.



Severus didn’t know what to do as he watched her admit defeat. For weeks she had been in her own prison and was now beginning to realize it. What words could he say that would comfort her? What actions could he do that would make her understand that she wasn’t alone? He brought himself to her level and knelt down next to her.



“Hermione.” he whispered.



“I just want to disappear and pretend none of this ever happened.” Her voice was low and laced with tears.



“It won’t make it go away and you know it.”



“I’m so tired... I’m tired all the time… I just want one night where I won’t be awoken by THEM.” she pleaded, her eyes roaming to the box Severus clutched.



They stared at each other for a few seconds before she leaned her head against the door and looked the opposite direction of him, trying to do everything in her power not to show him her vulnerabilities. It was a battle she was failing, but she still held on to a glimmer of hope that she wasn’t viewed as weak and useless by those around her.



After a few moments of watching her, he realized that he needed to inform Dumbledore about the “present.” He was about to speak, but noticed that she had fallen asleep.



It would be too simple to cast a spell that would carry her to her bed, but he took his gamble on doing it the old fashioned way. He picked up her body, which felt lighter than it did when he first found her at the Karnstein’s home. Upon the thought, he realized that she wasn’t seen too often at the dining hall. She mentioned once that she preferred to have her meals sent to her. He was beginning to think that she skipped meals all together. He thought against bringing her to the bed that had, in a sense, gave her so many nightmares, but he didn’t want to see her reaction if she would wake up in his bedroom chambers.



As he placed her sleeping form on her bed, he found a blanket that she had draped across a chair in the corner of her room and placed in on her. He then walked towards his door, grabbing the box and then flooed into Dumbledore’s office.





...........................................................................................................





“I can’t believe they’re doing this!” Minerva uttered in anger. She was chatting with the Headmaster when Severus arrived.



“What makes you think they wouldn’t? I just want to know how that box could have been owled to her. We have wards protecting the school from suspicious and unwanted delivery services.” Severus said pacing around the room in a manner that reminded the other two of Harry when he first heard his friend was abducted.



“Yes, but there are those rare few who can break through them.” Dumbledore added.



“You think the remaining Death Eaters are responsible?” Minerva asked.



“Who else would it be?” Dumbledore added.



“What about Indra Karnstein? What if she is somehow psychically transmitting messages to them? Do you think she could be powerful enough to break the wards even if given the opportunity.”



“Of course! She’s in Azkaban awaiting the Dementor’s Kiss, but she can still command them if needed be. I still don’t understand how she can break the wards though, unless, she’s found a different way to go about it.” Minerva spoke softly.



After another hour of the meeting, they decided to concentrate on strengthening the wards. Severus was going to try and place a tracking charm on the box to see where it was sent from. They had decided not to tell Harry of the incident, but leave it to Hermione instead.



When the three decided to call it a night, Minerva walked out. Before Severus could floo out, Dumbledore stopped him.



“Severus, could I have a few more moments with you.”



“What is it Albus?” Severus asked, tiredness apparent in his voice.



“How is Miss Granger getting along?”



Severus let out a breath of frustration and directed himself towards the chair next to the Headmaster.



“The girl is barely hanging on by a string.” Severus said too quickly.



“Well, she has you to lean on.”



“With all due respect Albus, you are barking mad! The girl wakes me up every morning with a scream that could wake the dead! She doesn’t even eat! I’m not some sort of therapist, even though you tend to place me in that position. She can go sod off those thoughts and feelings to Potter and all her friends! How she deals with her problems is her... problem!” Severus said with anger.



“Now Severus! She is trying to heal. You two working together have the potential to go far in Potions research.”



“Why must you insist that I like the girl? She is tolerable, but annoying nonetheless.”



“We cannot let Hermione slip out of our grasp Severus.”



“What in Merlin’s robes are you talking about old man!”



“Hermione has just been through an ordeal that most people wouldn’t be able to survive, at least with their sanity intact. She may pretend that everything is alright, even convince herself of that. She was never one who liked to show her weaknesses in front of everyone. I’m relying on you to look after her.”



“What do you want me to do? Sit down and quietly ask her how she’s feeling over tea?”



“Hermione is someone who needs to be pushed.”



“Pushed? Yeah, straight to St. Mungo’s!”



“Trust me Severus. It’s the only way she’ll break down her wall of denial.”



“Whatever old man!” Severus said as he flooed back to his chambers.





Upon reaching his chambers, he walked towards his bedroom but was debating whether or not to check up on Hermione. It was odd how he was internally referring to her first name rather than her last and that plagued his thoughts more than he liked to admit.



He slowly walked the corridor until he reached her bedroom door. He didn’t close it when he brought her there earlier, and while he wanted to just shut the door and call it a night, he couldn’t. He could hear music from the charmed music box Potter had given her. Did the girl ever hear of wards?



There she was. Once again, some muggle band was playing on the box, but it appeared to put her at ease. He watched her for a few moments, nonchalantly taking in the lyrics.





I think of you when you’re sleeping

and all the secrets that you’re keeping

you can’t stay all day under the covers

cause under there you’ll discover...

it’s the color of your skin

your skin is black metallic...





He moved over to her sitting chair and shifted it towards her bed. He didn’t know why he was doing it. For the first few seconds he questioned his own sanity at why he was there, watching her. He looked at the clock on her bedside table and saw that it was just after midnight. He knew that it was only a matter of hours before the nightmares would return.



Even in her sleep, she still looked tired. No matter how much rest she got, it would never be good enough. He didn’t know how she could keep herself together, even though he knew that she was cracking at the seams. She was wearing the same clothes, but was underneath her covers this time he finally noticed.



Her arm was draped just enough over her bed to where her hand was hanging off of it. He looked at the scars given to her from sadistic cigarette burns. This was the first time he had ever seen them ever since he rescued her. Her pale skin contained such dark reminders. He had a flashback to all of the bruises and blood and he shuddered at the memory.



There were times when he thought she would consider locking it all away in a pensieve. While a part of him wished she would, anything to bring back the witch he once knew, another part of him knew that she wouldn’t do it for the sake of remembrance. It’s sick how people torture ourselves with the past sometimes he thought.



Albus’ words came back to him of how he would have to push her. Upon looking at her, he didn’t think he could bear it, but he knew that would possibly be the only way to bring her back to them. She was a ghost he thought sadly. She wasn’t living but just killing time.



As the song ended, he stood up to go to bed and heard the song starting again. He walked towards her still sleeping form and watched her shift softly. The scar on her neck was now visible and a few strands of hair were draped across her face. Not fully realizing what he was doing, he reached out and traced them behind her ear.



“What this world wouldn’t give to see you glow again? What wouldn’t I give.” he thought suddenly. He didn’t have time to berate himself for thinking it, but reached for her hand that felt cold to the touch. And with those thoughts he walked out of her room. The door remained open on purpose.





Like clockwork the screams began. But this time, instead of just getting up and dealing with it, she continued her pitiful wails. He couldn’t just ignore her this time. He got up and ran towards her room. The music box was no longer working, but her screams were overshadowing it.



He realized that she wasn’t even fully awake. She was thrashing about on her bed, arms flaring in every direction, trying to hold off an invisible enemy.



“Just kill me!” she kept screaming incoherently. “Please. Please.”



He rushed towards her, trying not to scare her, and found himself sitting next to her, pulling her up. He still wasn’t sure if she was awake, but he felt her hand cling onto his sleeping robe.



“It’s going to be alright.” He whispered as began to slowly rock back and forth.

“I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”



She didn’t say anything, but her screams had stopped. He placed his hand on her head, feeling the hair that had once been compared to a bush but was now tame. It too had lost its glow and shine along with its owner.



Severus didn’t even realize that he was beginning to drift off to sleep as he leaned back onto the headboard. After drifting off for about an hour, Severus awoke and realized the strange comfort he felt with her in his arms. Her head was now resting on his lap. His hand was lingering in her hair and he realized that he would have to move. As he slowly moved, he tried not to disturb her, but found his job easy. He cast one last look at her before he walked back to his rooms.



“I have to push you.” was all he said before he walked away.







...........................................................................................................





The next few days passed by with no real significance. Hermione never knew of what Severus did as far as he knew. Severus had secretly stayed awake, hoping that she wouldn’t resort to her screams. But the thought that bugged him was the fact that he hoped she would wake up. He wanted to comfort her and tell her that everything would be fine. He still didn’t know how he would push her to the brink.





The next morning she would be assisting him in his fifth year Potions class. She would help monitor the students as they worked on their Potions. He watched her watch the students, telling them what they were doing right or wrong in their work. There was gentleness in her manner that he envied, but he wasn’t going to go soft just because she had a talent with the dunderheads.



He thought he saw a Hufflepuff mixing ingredients that weren’t supposed to be mixed and paced quickly towards him as he passed Hermione holding a vial, peering to see if it was the right color.



No one noticed as she froze, still gripping the vial. She heard the footsteps of Snape’s boots and her mind flashed back to the sound of their shoes on the stone floor. In slow motion she heard every shallow step. That was the trigger she realized as she saw Indra Karstein smiling down at her. It was the trigger that made her vision slide out of focus when she heard the grunts of those who violated her over and over again. She didn’t hear the voice of the fifth year Ravenclaw who was asking if she was alright. She only heard their laughs and felt the knife slide across her throat. Then the footsteps came back. Hermione dropped the vial on the floor to which made an even louder crack and pop because of its contents.



The Ravenclaws at the table scurried away as Severus quickly approached Hermione. She just stared into blank space, not even noticing that Snape quickly approached her and was now looking at her with both concern and anger. Seeing the glazed look in her eyes, he knew now was his moment.



Still looking at her, he dismissed his students.



“Get out!” he shouted to his students who were just in shock at Miss Granger’s condition. Seeing that not many moved, he ordered them again to get out.



“GET OUT! GET OUT! CLASS IS DISMISSED NOW!” as the Hufflepuff’s and Ravenclaw’s fled the room. He waved his hand and the cauldrons and tables were cleared and ingredients were shelved back into place. He then shut the classroom door. All the while, she was still staring into blank space.



“Miss Granger!” Severus said as he shook her lightly. “Can you hear me?”



It took her a second to realize that Snape was shaking her. She then looked down at his boots and he followed suit wondering just what in the hell was wrong with her. He then realized what happened to her.



“Did you have a flashback?” he asked.



She nodded, not looking at him. He then lifted her chin so she could face him.



“Your boots.” she whispered.



Severus then did what he knew he had to do.



“This has to stop.” He said sternly. “I can’t have an incompetent girl floating around messing up potentially dangerous potions because she has a flashback!”



Hermione just stared at him in disbelief at his accusations not knowing what to say. She watched him back away from her while he continued his attack.



“I’m so tired of being awoken by your bloody screams at night! I tell you to put a silencing charm so I won’t have listen to that aggravating charm box Potter bought you! I ask you to come here and watch to make sure these fifth year’s follow through with the instructions and you prove to be more of a dunderhead than them! Merlin woman! I can’t bear to think of what you’re doing to the first and second years!”



With that, Hermione swept past him and walked straight towards his chamber door and into her bedroom and slammed the door shut. Severus shut his eyes, regretting the words that he knew would cut her. He turned around and decided to let the forced attack continue as he walked towards her door. He was about to do what he did best…add insult to injury. Once again, she didn’t ward her door and he didn’t even bother to knock, but rather walked in. Before he could even utter a word, she threw herself at him, pushing him with a force he didn’t think her weak body would have.



“FUCK YOU!”



“You will not speak to me in such a manner!” he said as he tried to put on the front that she didn’t have the physical power she really did possess.



“MAYBE YOU NEED TO BE SPOKEN OF IN SUCH A MANNER! YOU OF ALL MEN IS NOTHING MORE THAN A....”



“A pompous ass?” Severus interrupted. “Or perhaps, greasy git? Overgrown bat? There is nothing I haven’t heard whispered behind my back down these hallowed halls.”



“I WAS GOING TO SAY ASSHOLE IF YOU REALLY WANTED TO KNOW!”



“Well, we can add that one to the list.” Severus said in a tone reminiscent of ice.



Calming down a bit, Hermione continued, “I’ve never, in all my years, met a man who thinks himself too important such as yourself! You know what you can do with your list. You can shove it up your ass!”



She caught her breath for another second and never gave Snape the chance to retort when she continued. “How dare you speak to me in such a tone. You have NO BLOODY IDEA what I have been through. You don’t know what it’s like to watch them murder your parents in front of your eyes and all the while knowing that you can do not a damn thing to stop them! You don’t know what it’s like to feel them enter you over and over and over again and feel the blood flow out of your body. You’ve never smelled his breath that was laced with too much firewhiskey. You’ve never looked them in the eye and begged them to just KILL YOU AND PUT YOU OUT OF YOUR MISERY BUT THEY WON’T BECAUSE IT WILL ONLY BRING YOU MORE PAIN AND PUT A SMILE ON THEIR FACES!” Her face was now red and streaming with tears.



“YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT IT’S LIKE TO FEEL HIM PUT OUT HIS FAGS ON YOUR FEET AND ARMS AND FEEL ANOTHER ONE BRING HIS FETISH FOR KNIVES INTO PLAY! YOU DON’T FALL ASLEEP EVERY NIGHT, KNOWING THAT EVEN THOUGH THEY’RE GONE, THEY’RE STILL GOING TO COME BACK! FUCK YOU AND YOUR PRECIOUS POTIONS CLASS!” Hermione shouted at the top of her lungs. It wouldn’t surprise Severus if her voice would be gone the next day.



“THANK YOU MERLIN!” Severus said with a slight laugh as he walked towards Hermione, placing his hands on her shoulders. The look on her face was a priceless one. She didn’t know what was going on with the man.



“What are you talking about?” she said, trying to catch her breath.



“FINALLY! After all this time you are finally admitting what you’ve been through! I’ve watched you build this wall around yourself, not telling anyone what happened to you. You’ve made yourself ill with your isolation and now you can move on with it!”



“You mean, you set that spectacle up just to get me to admit everything?” Hermione said, realization dawning on her.



“YES! AND IT WORKED! Dumbledore told me that I needed to push you to get you out of this rut and, may I add, you did an excellent job pushing back. Don’t you see, now that you’ve admitted that all of this happened, you can move on with your life!”



Hermione backed away slowly and began to think of just how she had been denying what happened. She wasn’t in denial, but in reality, maybe she was. The greasy git was right.



“So, Dumbledore told you that I needed to be confronted on the issue?”



“Yes.” Severus said calmly.



“Oh.” Hermione said softly as she turned her back to him, took a step forward, and then all of a sudden turned around again and punched Severus straight in his nose and swiftly kneed him in the groin. The last thing she heard was a grunt of pain with his falling to the floor as she walked out of her room.