With A Dragon's Heart
folder
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
34
Views:
21,801
Reviews:
75
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
34
Views:
21,801
Reviews:
75
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
CHAPTER SEVEN: The Acknowledgment
CHAPTER SEVEN: The Acknowledgment
Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy were still lying on the cold stone floor thirty minutes after their horrendous ordeal. What started as apprehension and anticipation of the next wave of pain, soon turned into the realization that there wasn\'t going to be any future out bursts. But in the back of their minds, they couldn’t shake the feeling entirely.
“I’m sure this confirms your belief.”
Harry turned his head to face Draco. “What are you talking about?”
“That Snape is a heartless bastard.”
Harry looked back up to the ceiling. “Actually I don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t think that. I know why he did it.”
Draco raised his eyebrow in disbelief, and even though Harry couldn’t see it, he felt it in the tone of Draco\'s voice.
“And what do you THINK you know?”
Harry sat up and crossed his legs, but kept his head down.
He whispered, “To make me realize that I’m not angry with you.”
Draco quickly rose to a sitting position, squinting his eyes at Harry. “You’re not?”
Harry shook his head letting his bangs swish side to side. “No.”
Draco noticed Harry didn\'t have his glasses on and thought Harry looked odd without them. He glanced around the area until he found them and crawled over to pick them up.
“Here. You must have … uh… dropped these,” he said as he handed them over to Harry.
Catching the sight of them through the corner of his eyes, he gingerly took them and placed them back on his face. “Thank you,” he said quietly.
Draco said nothing as he turned to stare out in space. Silence surrounded the room save for the sounds of their breathing. Ten minutes went by.
Barely audible, Draco asked, “Why, Potter?”
Harry pursed his lips tightly and squeezed his eyes shut. After a short pause, “I’m sorry I said that about your father. It was not my place.” He hoped Draco caught the hint to ignore that subject.
“I understand why you said it.” Another pause. “I’m not my father. Although I know he wants me to be. And yes, I know that idea would make him so PROUD of me,” he said bitterly.
“I still had no right to say that.”
Draco nodded again, but not in agreement. “And I shouldn’t have said that about your family.”
Harry cringed at the mention of his ‘family”. Draco noticed his reaction.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up again. I’m sure that they are …”
“You don’t know how lucky you are.”
Draco sputtered, “What? What are talking about?”
“At least you have a family who cares about you,” he said flatly.
“I-I don’t understand. You were defending them. I heard you.”
“No. No I wasn\'t. I just … I just didn\'t want to be reminded of them. Or to be compared to your family. Or anyone else’s. We’re only related by blood. I would hardly call them my ‘family’.”
“Oh. Sorry. I didn\'t know,” Draco mumbled. “How… how can you stand living with…”
“Can we please change the subject?” Harry interrupted.
“Right. Sorry.” Draco thought a moment. “Why do you think Snape said three hours when he knew…”
Harry lifted his head and smirked, “I don’t know. Maybe to…TALK…”
“Why in the world would he think WE would talk?”
Harry snorted as he shook his head. “In case you hadn’t noticed, Malfoy, we ARE talking.”
A pink flush went across his face as he chuckled in his throat. How could he have said something so stupid? And in front of Potter no doubt. He felt his embarrassment and lowered his head. Harry softly smiled in amusement as he watched his nemesis show a vulnerable side of himself. He looked away still smiling. It quickly faded as he heard that dreaded subject again.
“Why, Potter? Why do you hate yourself so much? I mean you must to do something as … as…”
“Why do you care, Malfoy? I mean why do you REALLY care?” he snapped.
“It’s not normal. Don’t you realize that? It’s just. Not. Normal.”
“And what is normal, Malfoy? Spouting hateful insults at people that you don’t even know?”
“I was raised that way,” he said defensively.
“Well so WAS I!”
Harry was unaware of what came out of his mouth until he saw Draco\'s shocked expression. He immediately twisted his body away and placed a hand up to cover his eyes.
“Potter…”
Harry jumped to his feet and stormed away, muttering to himself, “Goddamn it! GodDAMN IT!”
Draco lifted himself to his feet, approached Harry, and carefully placed his hand on Harry’s shoulder.
Harry spun around, jerking away.
“DON’T TOUCH ME! DON’T YOU FUCKING TOUCH ME!”
Draco gasped at Harry’s sudden outcry. He never heard Harry curse. Harry stormed away again, moving to the other side of the room. He slid down the wall and brought his knees to his chest. He wrapped his arms around his legs and rested his head on top of them. Draco tried to decide if he should let this go or try to talk to him. But his instincts took over and he carefully walked over to the cowering boy. He knelt down in front of Harry, but yet at a good distance.
“Potter …” he whispered, restraining himself so he wouldn\'t touch Harry again.
“Don’t, Malfoy. Just DON’T,” Harry said, muffled.
Draco\'s voice was now firmer. “Potter. You NEED to get help! Whatever they did was WRONG. You KNOW that.”
Harry snapped his head up. “AND WHAT DO I SAY, MALFOY? THE TRUTH? Oh yeah, I can see the headlines now! ‘The-Boy-Who-Lived. Raped and beaten by his own family’! I would be mortified!”
“But, Potter. It doesn’t have to be that way! There are places… PEOPLE who could help!” Harry snorted. “I mean LOOK at you!”
“Look at WHAT, Malfoy?”
“YOU! Sitting in the corner, scared shitless, just because someone touched you!”
“I’M NOT SCARED!”
Draco scoffed, jumped to his feet, and began pacing. He ran his fingers through his hair before he turned back to Harry.
“FINE! You’re not scared! But that still doesn’t explain your actions!”
“Maybe I just don’t want to be touched by YOU.”
“THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT AND YOU KNOW IT!”
Draco took a deep breath, in an attempt to let go of his anger. He did NOT want to be sick again.
“I know you’re mad, Potter, but do you really want to go through that pain again? I for one don’t.”
Harry closed his eyes and sighed. He didn\'t know what was worse, being in physical pain or a mental one. Though he has had plenty of experience in both. He laid his head back down on his knees again.
“Sometimes physical pain helps you forget,” he whispered.
“NO IT DOESN’T!”
Harry shot his head up. “And how would YOU know, Malfoy?” he spouted.
“Because I just do, all right? Granted I have never been raped, but I’ve had enough mental and physical abuse to last a lifetime! But I don’t punish myself for it! I’m not angry at myself! I KNOW who to be angry with! And so should YOU!”
Harry sprung to his feet with his fists clenched by his side.
“Calm down, Potter. I really don’t want to see you sick again.”
“Why, Malfoy? So YOU wont feel guilty? Because YOU don’t want to see it?”
“For Merlin\'s sake, Potter! Can’t you for once think about YOURSELF?!”
“Why should I? Nobody else does!”
Draco spun around and walked away, growling. He turned back around marched back up to Harry.
“Ugh! You are so pathetic! Are you even listening to yourself? ‘No one loves me. Everyone wants to hurt me.’”
“SHUT IT, Malfoy!”
“NO! It’s about time someone tells you the truth! Don’t your friends help you? Aren’t they supposed to be there to support you?” Harry looked away. “Oh I see. You don’t even TALK to them, do you? You didn\'t even tell them, did you?”
“They wouldn\'t understand.”
“How the fuck would you know? You didn\'t even give them a chance!”
Harry crossed his arms and slowly turned around to face the wall. He rested his head on it.
“Gods Potter. Just because you have one fucked up family, doesn’t mean EVERYONE wants to hurt you! The only person I see who hurts you is YOU!”
Harry replied just below a whisper, “Don’t you?”
He heard Draco scoff behind him. “You probably won’t believe me, but no. I don’t.”
“You\'re right. I don’t believe you.”
Draco sighed. “Potter,” he whispered. “How can I show you?”
“By going away.”
“Sorry. I wont do that.”
Harry grunted in disgust. “Why not, Malfoy. WHY do you CARE so much?”
“HAVEN\'T YOU FIGURED THAT OUT BY NOW, YOU IGNORANT PRAT?”
Harry tried to look over his shoulder, but couldn’t see him. He turned around and Draco was faced away from him, arms folded.
“So tell me.”
Draco spun around. “Because I like you, all right?”
Harry opened his mouth and his eyes widened. “But … but why?”
Draco glared at him. “Why is that so shocking, Potter?” he said bitterly.
“Because… you hate me.”
Draco gritted his teeth. “I don’t hate you, Potter. I envy you.”
Harry WAS shocked. “What? Why?”
“Gods, Potter. You really think that low of yourself, don’t you?”
Harry lowered his face, looked at the ground, and nodded.
Draco sighed. “Potter. What I really want to do right now is hug you.”
Harry shook his head frantically.
“Harry, I wont hurt you. I promise.”
Harry lifted his head up, surprised to hear his given name. He shook his head again.
Draco was disappointed and it was evident on his face. He bit his lower lip and took a few steps toward Harry.
Still shaking his head, Harry began to tremble. “No. Please.”
“I wont hurt you. I swear,” he softly said as he approached closer.
He came within Harry’s personal space and Harry shut his eyes. He felt the warmth of Draco\'s body and began to shake uncontrollably.
“Shh,” Draco whispered.
Harry tightened his eyes and held his breath. He could feel Draco\'s arm snake behind his back. Almost lovingly. Draco moved in closer, and their body’s lightly touched each other. Draco raised his hand to the back of Harry’s head and gently stroked his hair.
“Don’t run away from this.” Draco meant to say ‘me’ but thought it was safer to say ‘this’.
Harry finally submitted and rested his head in the crevice of Draco\'s neck. Draco sighed of relief. He heard Harry quietly sobbing. It was at that moment Draco had never felt so honored to have broken the barrier Harry had put around himself. Draco knew Harry had a long way to go.
~*~*~*~*~
Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy were still lying on the cold stone floor thirty minutes after their horrendous ordeal. What started as apprehension and anticipation of the next wave of pain, soon turned into the realization that there wasn\'t going to be any future out bursts. But in the back of their minds, they couldn’t shake the feeling entirely.
“I’m sure this confirms your belief.”
Harry turned his head to face Draco. “What are you talking about?”
“That Snape is a heartless bastard.”
Harry looked back up to the ceiling. “Actually I don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t think that. I know why he did it.”
Draco raised his eyebrow in disbelief, and even though Harry couldn’t see it, he felt it in the tone of Draco\'s voice.
“And what do you THINK you know?”
Harry sat up and crossed his legs, but kept his head down.
He whispered, “To make me realize that I’m not angry with you.”
Draco quickly rose to a sitting position, squinting his eyes at Harry. “You’re not?”
Harry shook his head letting his bangs swish side to side. “No.”
Draco noticed Harry didn\'t have his glasses on and thought Harry looked odd without them. He glanced around the area until he found them and crawled over to pick them up.
“Here. You must have … uh… dropped these,” he said as he handed them over to Harry.
Catching the sight of them through the corner of his eyes, he gingerly took them and placed them back on his face. “Thank you,” he said quietly.
Draco said nothing as he turned to stare out in space. Silence surrounded the room save for the sounds of their breathing. Ten minutes went by.
Barely audible, Draco asked, “Why, Potter?”
Harry pursed his lips tightly and squeezed his eyes shut. After a short pause, “I’m sorry I said that about your father. It was not my place.” He hoped Draco caught the hint to ignore that subject.
“I understand why you said it.” Another pause. “I’m not my father. Although I know he wants me to be. And yes, I know that idea would make him so PROUD of me,” he said bitterly.
“I still had no right to say that.”
Draco nodded again, but not in agreement. “And I shouldn’t have said that about your family.”
Harry cringed at the mention of his ‘family”. Draco noticed his reaction.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up again. I’m sure that they are …”
“You don’t know how lucky you are.”
Draco sputtered, “What? What are talking about?”
“At least you have a family who cares about you,” he said flatly.
“I-I don’t understand. You were defending them. I heard you.”
“No. No I wasn\'t. I just … I just didn\'t want to be reminded of them. Or to be compared to your family. Or anyone else’s. We’re only related by blood. I would hardly call them my ‘family’.”
“Oh. Sorry. I didn\'t know,” Draco mumbled. “How… how can you stand living with…”
“Can we please change the subject?” Harry interrupted.
“Right. Sorry.” Draco thought a moment. “Why do you think Snape said three hours when he knew…”
Harry lifted his head and smirked, “I don’t know. Maybe to…TALK…”
“Why in the world would he think WE would talk?”
Harry snorted as he shook his head. “In case you hadn’t noticed, Malfoy, we ARE talking.”
A pink flush went across his face as he chuckled in his throat. How could he have said something so stupid? And in front of Potter no doubt. He felt his embarrassment and lowered his head. Harry softly smiled in amusement as he watched his nemesis show a vulnerable side of himself. He looked away still smiling. It quickly faded as he heard that dreaded subject again.
“Why, Potter? Why do you hate yourself so much? I mean you must to do something as … as…”
“Why do you care, Malfoy? I mean why do you REALLY care?” he snapped.
“It’s not normal. Don’t you realize that? It’s just. Not. Normal.”
“And what is normal, Malfoy? Spouting hateful insults at people that you don’t even know?”
“I was raised that way,” he said defensively.
“Well so WAS I!”
Harry was unaware of what came out of his mouth until he saw Draco\'s shocked expression. He immediately twisted his body away and placed a hand up to cover his eyes.
“Potter…”
Harry jumped to his feet and stormed away, muttering to himself, “Goddamn it! GodDAMN IT!”
Draco lifted himself to his feet, approached Harry, and carefully placed his hand on Harry’s shoulder.
Harry spun around, jerking away.
“DON’T TOUCH ME! DON’T YOU FUCKING TOUCH ME!”
Draco gasped at Harry’s sudden outcry. He never heard Harry curse. Harry stormed away again, moving to the other side of the room. He slid down the wall and brought his knees to his chest. He wrapped his arms around his legs and rested his head on top of them. Draco tried to decide if he should let this go or try to talk to him. But his instincts took over and he carefully walked over to the cowering boy. He knelt down in front of Harry, but yet at a good distance.
“Potter …” he whispered, restraining himself so he wouldn\'t touch Harry again.
“Don’t, Malfoy. Just DON’T,” Harry said, muffled.
Draco\'s voice was now firmer. “Potter. You NEED to get help! Whatever they did was WRONG. You KNOW that.”
Harry snapped his head up. “AND WHAT DO I SAY, MALFOY? THE TRUTH? Oh yeah, I can see the headlines now! ‘The-Boy-Who-Lived. Raped and beaten by his own family’! I would be mortified!”
“But, Potter. It doesn’t have to be that way! There are places… PEOPLE who could help!” Harry snorted. “I mean LOOK at you!”
“Look at WHAT, Malfoy?”
“YOU! Sitting in the corner, scared shitless, just because someone touched you!”
“I’M NOT SCARED!”
Draco scoffed, jumped to his feet, and began pacing. He ran his fingers through his hair before he turned back to Harry.
“FINE! You’re not scared! But that still doesn’t explain your actions!”
“Maybe I just don’t want to be touched by YOU.”
“THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT AND YOU KNOW IT!”
Draco took a deep breath, in an attempt to let go of his anger. He did NOT want to be sick again.
“I know you’re mad, Potter, but do you really want to go through that pain again? I for one don’t.”
Harry closed his eyes and sighed. He didn\'t know what was worse, being in physical pain or a mental one. Though he has had plenty of experience in both. He laid his head back down on his knees again.
“Sometimes physical pain helps you forget,” he whispered.
“NO IT DOESN’T!”
Harry shot his head up. “And how would YOU know, Malfoy?” he spouted.
“Because I just do, all right? Granted I have never been raped, but I’ve had enough mental and physical abuse to last a lifetime! But I don’t punish myself for it! I’m not angry at myself! I KNOW who to be angry with! And so should YOU!”
Harry sprung to his feet with his fists clenched by his side.
“Calm down, Potter. I really don’t want to see you sick again.”
“Why, Malfoy? So YOU wont feel guilty? Because YOU don’t want to see it?”
“For Merlin\'s sake, Potter! Can’t you for once think about YOURSELF?!”
“Why should I? Nobody else does!”
Draco spun around and walked away, growling. He turned back around marched back up to Harry.
“Ugh! You are so pathetic! Are you even listening to yourself? ‘No one loves me. Everyone wants to hurt me.’”
“SHUT IT, Malfoy!”
“NO! It’s about time someone tells you the truth! Don’t your friends help you? Aren’t they supposed to be there to support you?” Harry looked away. “Oh I see. You don’t even TALK to them, do you? You didn\'t even tell them, did you?”
“They wouldn\'t understand.”
“How the fuck would you know? You didn\'t even give them a chance!”
Harry crossed his arms and slowly turned around to face the wall. He rested his head on it.
“Gods Potter. Just because you have one fucked up family, doesn’t mean EVERYONE wants to hurt you! The only person I see who hurts you is YOU!”
Harry replied just below a whisper, “Don’t you?”
He heard Draco scoff behind him. “You probably won’t believe me, but no. I don’t.”
“You\'re right. I don’t believe you.”
Draco sighed. “Potter,” he whispered. “How can I show you?”
“By going away.”
“Sorry. I wont do that.”
Harry grunted in disgust. “Why not, Malfoy. WHY do you CARE so much?”
“HAVEN\'T YOU FIGURED THAT OUT BY NOW, YOU IGNORANT PRAT?”
Harry tried to look over his shoulder, but couldn’t see him. He turned around and Draco was faced away from him, arms folded.
“So tell me.”
Draco spun around. “Because I like you, all right?”
Harry opened his mouth and his eyes widened. “But … but why?”
Draco glared at him. “Why is that so shocking, Potter?” he said bitterly.
“Because… you hate me.”
Draco gritted his teeth. “I don’t hate you, Potter. I envy you.”
Harry WAS shocked. “What? Why?”
“Gods, Potter. You really think that low of yourself, don’t you?”
Harry lowered his face, looked at the ground, and nodded.
Draco sighed. “Potter. What I really want to do right now is hug you.”
Harry shook his head frantically.
“Harry, I wont hurt you. I promise.”
Harry lifted his head up, surprised to hear his given name. He shook his head again.
Draco was disappointed and it was evident on his face. He bit his lower lip and took a few steps toward Harry.
Still shaking his head, Harry began to tremble. “No. Please.”
“I wont hurt you. I swear,” he softly said as he approached closer.
He came within Harry’s personal space and Harry shut his eyes. He felt the warmth of Draco\'s body and began to shake uncontrollably.
“Shh,” Draco whispered.
Harry tightened his eyes and held his breath. He could feel Draco\'s arm snake behind his back. Almost lovingly. Draco moved in closer, and their body’s lightly touched each other. Draco raised his hand to the back of Harry’s head and gently stroked his hair.
“Don’t run away from this.” Draco meant to say ‘me’ but thought it was safer to say ‘this’.
Harry finally submitted and rested his head in the crevice of Draco\'s neck. Draco sighed of relief. He heard Harry quietly sobbing. It was at that moment Draco had never felt so honored to have broken the barrier Harry had put around himself. Draco knew Harry had a long way to go.
~*~*~*~*~