Tearmann 2

Harry stepped around the bulky woman and stopped short. His heart leapt into his throat and fresh tears welled up in his eyes. The air had been sucked from his lungs and was replaced with mud. It wasn\'t until a gentle hand touched his shoulder that Harry was able to move and breath again. He had expected Severus to be pale and thin, but the sight that greeted him was almost more than he could stand.

Severus sat in the middle of the twin size bed. He was wearing a pair of black shorts that looked dampened by sweat, which was shining on the sides of his face and down his flimsy looking chest. Harry could have counted every bone in his chest and arms. Severus was devastatingly thin, his skin all but translucent and hanging off his body.

What shocked Harry the most were the haunted black eyes that stared into space. They were empty, void of all feeling and emotion. He didn\'t look at Harry or the medi-witch, didn\'t seemed to look at anything at all. The cool obsidian orbs that Harry had loved so much were nothing more than inky black holes set in a ghostly white face.

Harry couldn\'t stop the flow of tears as he stepped toward the bed. \"Oh, Professor, I\'m so sorry,\" he whispered. He pulled the single plush chair from the corner and set it in front of Severus\' bed and sat down. He had completely forgotten about the witch standing behind him until her soft voice reached him.

\"Talk softly and don\'t move suddenly. You\'ll frighten him. Also, don\'t try to touch him. He doesn\'t like physical contact. If you think you\'ll be all right, I\'ll leave you.\"

Harry gave a slow nod, his eyes never leaving Severus\' face.

\"If you need help, just press the button on the wall beside the bed. If he gets upset, hit the button right away. He has a tendency to hurt himself when he\'s upset.\" Harry nodded again before hearing the woman\'s footsteps retreating from the room, the door closing softly.

For a long time Harry just watched the man, waiting for a sign of life. When Harry\'s neck was beginning to cramp from lack of movement, he tore his gaze away from the catatonic man and looked around the small room. It smelled clean and fresh as though recently scrubbed. There wasn\'t the antiseptic smells that were common in Muggle hospitals. It was solid white; just as the other rooms Harry had seen, with the only color coming from the pale blue comforter on the bed under Severus\' still body.

There was a small table next to the bed and Harry could see a picture on it. When he looked closer at it, he saw that it was a still picture of Hogwarts in a view from across the lake. On the other side of the room was a large dresser.

There were no windows in this room. Harry thought this might have been done on purpose since Severus was used to not having windows in the dungeons back home. It might be strangely comforting to the often-solitary man.

Harry returned his gaze to the pale face and noticed that the man was looking back at him. At first this made Harry excited. Finally the man was showing signs of life. Harry looked closer, however, and realized there was no look of recognition. Severus seemed not to know who Harry was.

\"Hello, Professor,\" he said quietly. \"It\'s me, Harry. You do know who I am, don\'t you?\"

Harry sighed deeply when he got no response. He could feel his cheeks begin to burn as new tears started behind his eyes. Every thing that was Severus Snape had faded away. There didn\'t seem to be anything left of the man he had fallen in love with, just an empty shell. He finally understood the look of defeat he had seen on Dumbledore\'s face over the last few weeks.

\"I\'m sorry, so very sorry.\" Harry\'s heart was breaking more assuredly then anything. It was over and Voldemort had won. He had claimed his final victory just as he said he would. As the final battle was winding down, Voldemort had promised that he would take Harry\'s heart with him, and now he was doing just that.

Severus was motionless within himself. He recognised that someone was there talking to him but was unwilling to look closer. He didn\'t want company. He was abandoned as was proper for him. All his life, he was told by one person or another that he was worthless, unimportant. That certainly couldn\'t have changed now that his spying skills were no longer required.

Remembering the medi-witch\'s words, but not caring, Harry slowly reached out for Severus\' hand. At first, nothing happened. Harry felt light icy fingers in his palm, the softness of the skin surprising him. For several moments, he just lightly held the hand, stroking it gently. He stared down at it, not daring to look into the empty eyes again.

Severus could feel the touch. At first it was comforting. Someone cared enough to hold his hand. It felt... good, as though it was the most natural thing in the world. After a moment, however, Severus remembered that he was abandoned. Albus didn\'t care anymore and if he didn\'t, who else was there? He didn\'t deserve someone\'s love or attention.

Then suddenly, Severus started shaking violently. When Harry looked up, he saw wide, frightened eyes looking directly at him. He quickly let go of his hand and pushed his chair away from the bed. Severus was panting but still hadn\'t made a sound.