It\'s Only Love, What Is Everyone So Afraid Of?

Disclaimer : Me no own; You no sue ^





Disclaimer :
Me no own; You no sue ^.^

 

A/N: As
always, thank you for the reviews. There are going to be a *lot* of chapters to
this story and the reviews keep me going when motivation is low.

After the
end of the last chapter, here is your gratuitous “happy” chapter, though I
wouldn’t call it fluff per say. Heh…more like angsty goo…maybe. ALTHOUGH, as it
states in the summary, this is angsty slash with fluff thrown in…not fluffy
slash with angst thrown in. Our boys are in a complex situation and it’s going
to be a bumpy ride. I, personally, love the bumps…they keep it interesting…but
that could be the masochist in me. I am so very ready to continue the story
beyond the film and I am constantly having to fight rushing through the
chapters, so I apologize if this one is sub-par. I am trying my best to make
them full and not choppy, but as I am still new to this writing thing, I’m not
sure if it’s working. ANYHOO! On with the beautiful boy love! *drool*. Please
R&R.

 

P.S. I
understand that the Malfoy Manor thing is a little far fetched…but, hey, work
with me here.

 

 

Chapter
6…………….Harry and the hippogriff?

******************************************************

 

Harry
lurched forward to the ground. This had to be an illusion…a side effect of the
wine. He thought he might be sick.

 

As if on
cue, the sky burst open pouring unimaginable amounts of water down on the
grounds, and before Pansy or Draco could notice the rain bouncing off of the patent
lump in front of them, Pansy let out a girlish squeak and ran for the castle.
Harry scrambled to get behind a bush and once this was accomplished, he removed
his cloak and stood to look at Draco.

 

The blonde
looked like he hadn’t even noticed the rain, sitting on the ground, with his
knees bent, his chin resting in between his kneecaps. Harry continued to
observe him for a moment, still trying to decipher his thoughts about what he
had seen and heard.

 

Draco merely
leaned back a few inches, tilted his head towards the sky, positioned his arms
straight out like wings and just sat
there.

 

‘Why is he sitting in the rain like
this?’

 

Unable to
take it any longer, H dec decided to gather up his now soaking cloak and just
go back to his room. At least he could cry out loud there. He began to stalk
away as quietly as possible when a quiet voice from behind him stopped him dead
in his tracks.

 

“Harry?”

 

That was it.
Whatever shred of dignity or self-restraint Harry thought he possessed in this
situation quickly left him and washed away with the rain. He whipped around on
his heels, not bothering with the ‘what
are you doing heres’ and the skirting around whether he’d seen them or not.


 

“BUSY?!”

 

“Harry…I….”

 

“Busy doing
what Draco? You lied to me!”

 

“I didn’t
lie….”

 

‘Didn’t lie? DIDN’T LIE?’ Harry was about to lose it. He was
tired. So very tired of constantly watching his back and wondering how much
everyone knew. He’d all but laid his soul bare to the blonde in front of him
and for what? Harry decided right there that he was through with the
impersonalities and constant allusions. He was a Gryffindor damnit! Where was
his courage now? Before he’d even realized he was going to do it his hand
seemingly acted on its own will and gifted Draco’s cheek with a slap that,
although mediocre, clearly got his point across.

 

“Don’t tell
me you didn’t dam damnit! You purposefully tried to keep this from me and
*that* is still lying, but obviously no one ever cared enough to teach you
that.”

 

His words
stung. Harry had hit a nerve with Draco and he knew it. Just a few nights
before they’d been lying on Harry’s bed discussing Draco’s father and his
upbringing; Harry knew it was a low blow, but didn’t particularly care at the
moment. Draco tensed and took a deep breath before forcing calm words from his
lips.

 

“That’s not
fair Harry.”

 

“FAIR? I’ll
tell you what’s not fair you bastard….no….you know what? Just get out of my
life…” Harry tried again to leave, but again was stopped by Draco’s voice from
behind him. Harry might not have stopped if the voice had not sounded almost
pleading.

 

“Don’t you see….Harry?”

 

Without
turning to face him, Harry raised his voice so that the Slytherin could hear
him over the rain.

 

“See what?”

 

“If I go out
with Pansy…I mean…if I see her now and again then no one will suspect…no one
will know. I haven’t spoken two words to her since Ball, I swear!”

 

“Oh so
you’re just using her then?”

 

“Yes…no!...”
Draco stammered.

 

“If she
means nothing to you why didn’t you just tell me you were seeing her today?”

 

“If you want
the truth…I *wanted* to see her today. I wanted…to feel good about myself. I
wanted the rest of them to see me with my pre-arranged pure blood girlfriend.”

 

Now Harry
turned around to meet the eyes of grey obscured by the rain.

 

“Great…now I know.” For the third time he
tried to leave…he really did, the hand on his arm would make the task a little
difficult though.

 

Draco was
closer to him now, close enough that Harry could make out all the drops of
water on his face. He’d like to think that some of them were tears, but told
himself not to hope for it when they were most likely just rain.

 

“All I
felt….I was going through the motions…holding her…kissing her. She’s a great
girl…I’ve known her all my life….I like her Harry….I really like her.”

 

Harry cursed
whatever foreign object that was apparently lodged in his throakingking his
breathing difficult and his words choppy.

 

“Do you love
her?”

 

Harry closed
his eyes; he didn’t know why he asked. The answer didn’t matter. Not only was
he certain that the answer would be yes, but he saw now. He saw how Pansy fit into
Draco’s life where he didn’t. Her name…her bloodlines…her gender. Harry steeled
himself for the blow that no fist could deliver…only words.

 

“I love *you*,
Harry.”

 

He forced
his eyes open. What? How? Why? It didn’t make any sense. He loved him? Harry couldn’t
be foolhardy enough to believe it…even if it were true…this obviously wasn’t
going to work. Not when it was driving him to tear stained and drunken lovers
spats in the rain. Slowly closing his eyes again to avoid the grey gaze he
could drown in sooner than this insipid rain, Harry had to force the next words
to leave his protesting lips.

 

“It can’t
work…Draco. You don’t mean that.”

 

“I do! I
love you!”

 

“How do I
know that?”

 

“Well if it
helps I won’t see Pansy anymore.”

 

“Can’t you
see, that’s not enough! *I* want to make you feel good about yourself. Christ
Draco! You don’t even want people to know we’re friends! It’s like you’re
ashamed to even look in my direction when other people are around!”

 

“I’ll do
better…please…just give me another chance…I’ll prove it…I’ll prove I love
you…just…please…” Draco hung his head waiting for Harry to decide. Drops of rain
dripped from the soaking strands of hair obscuring his eyes, reflecting an
ethereal prism, the color playing off of his pale, moonlit skin.

 

‘Why does he have to be so
beautiful?’ Harry
thought, irritated, but strangely full of hope. Draco had that broken doll look
about him again, the same one from their first night together, and Harry almost
wept at the sight. He wondered briefly if Draco meant to look this way, knowing
it would break him, or if it was precisely that he was so unaware of his own
beauty that made him so magnificent. With no further thought, he stepped
forward and enveloped the surprised boy in an embrace, burying his face in the
drenched blonde mass now next to his cheek.

 

“I’m sorry
Harry…so sorry….” The words almost didn’t reach him they were so soft.

 

Is a s a
long moment before either of them spoke again, both afraid to upset the fragile
balance they had created. Inevitably though, Harry’s curiosity got the better
of him.

 

“Is this why
you weren’t at breakfast that day?” Harry asked.

 

Draco’s
reply was almost a whisper; Harry could feel his words against his neck more
than he could hear them.

 

“Yes, and
no. I was with Snape. He knows something’s wrong Harry.”

 

Harry winced
a bit at the word ‘wrong’, but let Draco continue without mentioning it.

 

“He wanted
to know where I’d been…he was asking me questions about you…like he knew
something but wanted me to say it…maybe he suspects but isn’t sure. So I
figured I needed to do damage control. I needed to put in an appearance with
Pansy to throw them off. I’m sorry…I should have told you…I’m sorry….”

 

When Draco
resumed his weeping, Harry’s heart broke. He was split down the middle between
cursing his weak will with the boy and extreme happiness that he had not lost
his dragon.

 

“Shh…stop
saying that. It’s over now. Just….don’t lie to me anymore, okay?”

 

“Okay.”

 

Harry moved
Draco’s chin to look him in the eyes. In them he saw pain, fear, uncertainty,
and love.

 

‘I have a feeling this is going to
hurt’ was Harry’s
last thought before closing the space between them for a very steamy, very
cliché, mind blowing kiss in the pouring rain.

 

****************************************

 

As it was
inevitable, Monday soon rolled around, bringing with it classes, lonely nights
and what Harry feared would be the same cold shoulder from his secret lover
when in the public eye.

 

After lunch,
Harry mindlessly wandered down some random hall, finding his way to his classes
out of habit and memory, his mind definitely somewhere else. He just happened
to glance up and notice Draco leaning against the wall having some meaningless
conversation with another seventh year. Upon further inspection Harry noticed
the girl was a Ravenclaw and that the two of them seemed rather enthralled with
their conversation. Thinking Draco probably didn’t notice him anyways, Harry
attempted to scurry past them with his eyes cast downward towards the floor.
Seething that those few steps seemed to be the hardest of his life, Harry was
surprised to hear his name called from behind him.

 

“Potter!”

 

Harry tried
to get his grin under control before turning around… he only half succeeded.
Knowing his voice would betray him and most likely come out as an indignant
squeak, he faced Malfoy expectantly, saying nothing.

 

“I have some
good news; I’ll tell you all about it after your quidditch practice later,
okay?”

 

Harry just
nodded his head, still at a loss for words and when he sat down at his desk in
his next class, he wasn’t sure how he’d gotten there. He felt like he’d just
floated down the hall and landed there, although the lack of pointing and
whispers told him he probably didn’t. The rest of the day passed in a similar
fashion from classes, all the way through his practice. How he managed to catch
the snitch was totally beyond him, but he figured it had to be a good sign that
he could catch the thing even when his mind was far away.

With
practice over, he lingered around the stands, eager to hear Draco’s good news.

 

A bit of a
distance from the stands, Harry could see Draco approaching with a group of
other Slytherins. Steeling himself, Harry doubted that the rest of the group
would take kindly to Draco’s new ‘friend’.
He found he didn’t have to worry just yet though, as the rest of the group
veered in another direction and Harry could see Draco tell Zabini to go on
without him, that he would be right there. He also noticed Zabini’s glare aimed
somewhere between his ear and his scar…but let it go, as he had more important
things to deal with at that moment. As Draco drew near to him, he grinned at
the other boy.

 

“So what’s
this good news?”

 

“Well…this
weekend is a Hogsmeade weekend, correct?”

 

Harry
nodded.

 

“Everyone
will be there, but my parents have a social event to attend to…so the Manor
will be empty.”

 

Not entirely
sure where this was headed Harry cocked his head slightly.

 

“….And?”

 

“AND I can
portkey us there. Just us…alone…in the Manor…”

 

“How, may I
ask, can you do that?”

 

“I’m a
genuine spoiled brat, Potter; I would have thought you’d have noticed by now. I
have portkeys so I can go home whenever I please.”

 

“What if we
get caught?” Harry seemed a bit apprehensive.

 

“I doubt
anyone will even notice we’re gone…as long as you can keep the Mud….er…Granger
and the Weasel from sniffing around.”

 

Harry just
blinked, unsure of what to say, and silence reigned for a long moment before
Draco could take it no longer.

 

“Merlin
Potter, are you daft? Would you like to spend the weekend with me at the Manor
or not?”

 

Grinning,
Harry decided he liked this idea…in fact, it was one of the best ideas he’d
ever heard. He shifted his gaze to Draco and felt his grin twist into a smirk.

 

“Hmmm….I
have to think about it. Ow!” Harry rubbed the now sore spot on his arm. “You
pinched me!”

 

Harry also
learned that his smirk was no match for Malfoy’s…the master of smirks. He had
to admit that said smirk looked very fetching on him nonetheless, especially
when accompanied by his trademark drawl.

 

“You
deserved it.”

 

************************************************

 

 

Later, just
before bedtime, Hermione managed to drag Harry into a corner of the Gryffindor
common room and began the third degree. Harry wasn’t really in the mood, but
before he could protest, the bushy-haired girl began her tirade.

 

“Harry, is
it true? Did Malfoy really talk to you in the halls? In front of everyone?”

 

Harry
beamed. “Yes.”

 

“But I heard
he had a date with Parkinson the other day, I take it that was for show then?”

 

Again, “Yes.”

 

“What’s all
this business with Ginny? Does she know? Was she covering for you?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Does Malfoy
know she knows? Does he know *I* know?”

 

Harry
fidgeted, uncomfortably realizing that no, Draco didn’t know the two girls knew
of their affair, and although Harry was certain he could trust them, he didn’t
think Draco would appreciate it.

 

“No.”

 

“How did
Ginny find out? What’d she say? I bet she caught you snogging didn’t she?”

 

“Not
snogging exactly.”

 

“Has Ron
said anything about…well…liking me?”

 

“No....What?....where
did that come from?!”

 

“Well…he
sort of….he kissed me.”

 

Harry was
now quite interested in the conversation, not to mention glad that the topic
had switched from his love life for once. He grinned excitedly at his friend
and decided it was his turn to ask questions.

 

“Where?”

 

“By the
lake.”

 

“Mione…I…um…I
meant….where”

 

Hermione
rolled her eyes. “I know what you meant you miserable sod.” She shot him a
playful glare. “On the cheek.”

 

Harry gave
herug, ug, he had been feeling bad about neglecting her lately, and although he
was truly happy for his two friends for finally getting together, he selfishly
enjoyed the fact that this relieved a bit of his guilt.

 

“I knew he
liked you…he never said anything…but I could tell. I’m so happy for you guys!”

 

“Don’t go
buying my wedding present just yet! Afterwards he just ran off…mumbled some
excuse about Divination homework.”

 

Harry tried
to look and sound reassuring. “I’m sure he was just nervous…he really does like
you, like I said, I can tell. I can talk to him…if you like.”

 

Hermione’s
face suddenly lit up. “Would you?”

 

“Sure, I’ll
do it right now…I’ll fill you in tomorrow.”

 

Harry hugged
the girl one last time and set off to find his ginger friend. He didn’t have to
go far, as Ron was at that very moment, climbing through the portrait hole. The
red-haired boy took one look at Hermione, though, and abruptly turned around,
his face turning a brilliant red. Harry quickly leapt out after him, stumbling
into the hall to catch his best friend.

 

“Ron!....RON!”

 

Ron eased around,
obviously terrified. His face relaxed a bit, but not entirely, when he realized
Harry was alone.”

 

“Yeah,
Harry?”

 

“Come to my
room for a bit would you…I haven’t been able to really talk to you for a
while.”

 

Ron
contemplated turning Harry down, knowing somehow that his bespectacled friend was
going to ask him about Hermione, but when weighing talking to Harry against
actually having to face Hermione, Harry won out.

 

“Okay.”

 

Once the duo
made it inside Harry’s room, Harry inwardly cursed himself for not thinking the
invitation through…he had no idea if any of Draco’s things were lying about, so
he looked around hurriedly and used his seeker reflexes to ch uch up odd bits
here and there and shove them under the bed.

 

“So…” Harry
began, “how’ve you been? What’ve you been up to? What’s…oh hell…so you kissed
Mione?”

 

Ron muttered
something under his breath that sounded to Harry like “Cupid squirrels always
smell everything.” But Harry knew
that probably wasn’t correct.

 

“What?”

 

“I said
stupid girls always tell everything.”

 

“Oh…well,
she just told me, Ron…she was concerned about-”

 

Ron cut him
off. “I know! I know okay…and I’m sorry!”

 

Harry was
mildly confused with Ron’s sudden apology. “Sorry for what, Ron?”

 

Ron
scrambled over to Harry’s side and gave him a pleading look. “I couldn’t help
it…we were studying and she was being her usual bossy self and then the sun hit
her hair and she looked so pretty and I couldn’t help it…I’m sorry!”

 

“Whoa…slow
down mate…what exactly are you sorry for?”

 

“I *kissed*
Hermione, Harry…I *kissed* her…she’ll have my bullocks for earrings!”

 

Harry chuckled
a bit at the visual before trying to reassure his friend. “She’s not mad, Ron.”

 

“I know!
Tell her I’m….what?”

 

“She’s happy
you kissed her…she is a bit upset that you ran away though.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Really. So
what took you so long anyways?”

 

“Well I
thought maybe you two had something going on and didn’t want me to know
yet…seeing as how you were always together and laughing like you knew something
I didn’t.”

 

Harry winced
a bit at how close to home Ron’s comment actually hit, although he tried not to
let Ron notice.

 

“Well
obviously we don’t have ‘something going on’, but what made you change your
mind?”

 

“I first
started thinking about it a few weeks ago when you two were together less
often. I got to see her more, but I thought maybe you guys just had a row or
something and were cooling off…but then the thing with Ginny…”

 

“Oh…er…right….that.”

 

“So since
you’re off the market now, I couldn’t help it.” Ron was grinning ear to ear.
“Oh it’ll be so great, Harry, the four of us…we’ll have loads of fun!”

 

Harry
removed his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose in frustration; he really
did hate keeping Ron he dhe dark, but still could not find the courage to tell
him the truth. Placing his glasses on his bedside table, as he’d be going to
bed soon anyways, he gave Ron a pat on the shoulder before speaking.

 

“Right,
well, I suggest you find Mione and tell her all of this before bed, or else
you’ll have a very disgruntled witch on your case in the morning.”

 

“Yeah…I’ll
do that. I’ll see you at breakfast…and Harry?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“Thanks.”

 

**********************************************************************

 

 

As the week
passed the news that 2/3rds of the golden trio were romantically involved
spread through the school like wildfire. Harry thought the gossip both a
blessing and an annoyance. He thought it a blessing because it took attention
away from him, which he always welcomed, but it perturbed him that around every
corner the little groups of gossip mongers would abruptly stop and scurry away
when they noticed him. This kind of behavior made him paranoid, but alas, being
marked for death from infancy tends to make one permanently jumpy.

 

Draco spoke to him whenever they passed each
other in the halls, which made Harry happy, although the Slytherin never sought
him out for public conversation. Ginny seemed to thoroughly enjoy acting as his
girlfriend, and when he asked her about it she simply replied to him “Damnit
Harry…you crushed my dream, the least you can do is let me enjoy the charade
for now!” And so he let her. After all, she could be so much like her mother at
times, and Harry found that not just a little bit scary. Despite all of the new
developments and gossip, Harry found this particular week to be one of the best
in recent memory.

 

So when the
weekend came around Harry was so excited about spending it in domestic bliss
with Draco that he quite literally could not stop smiling. He felt the familiar
tug behind his navel and the next thing he knew, he was looking around the most
magnificent house he’d ever seen.

 

He no sooner
got to his feet than he launched himself at Draco, locking the blonde boy in a tight
embrace and blazing kiss. Draco returned his affections, but pulled away after
only a moment with a genuinely bright smile on his face.

 

“Eager are
we?” he drawled.

 

Harry only
grinned and made to pounce again, but Draco stopped him.

 

“C’mon
Harry, we’ve two days…I want to show you around.”

 

Harry
reluctantly agreed. After a grueling two hour tour of the massive mansion,
Draco suggested they eat lunch and before Harry could protest and offer up
snogging as a substitute, his stomach answered for him with a rather loud
grumble. After shoving food into his mouth at record speeds, Harry prepared to
attack again and was *again* thwarted by Draco who insisted he needed to run
upstairs and get something. A few minutes later he returned with a bottle of
what looked like a lotion of some sort. Harry fidgeted in his seat before
managing a lusty “So…what’s the lotion for?”

 

Draco
quirked an eyebrow. “Its sun block, you walking hard on. In case you haven’t
noticed…I have quite a fair complexion.”

 

Harry rolled
his eyes, Draco wasn’t girly in any way, but he could be quite high maintenance
at times. “Why do you need sun block?”

 

“I just told
you Boy-Who-Obviously-Can’t-Hear…I burn easily!”

 

Harry
punched him lightly in the arm for his smart remark. “I *heard* that part…what
are we doing that requires sun block?”

 

Draco
quirked his eyebrow again. “We’re going swimming.”

 

****************************************************************************

 

Meanwhile,
at Hogsmeade, Hermione and Ron were leisurely wandering about when Ron noticed
Gicozycozying up to a flushed Colin Creevy. Ron snorted and turned to Hermione.


 

“She finally
gets Harry and look at her, I guess she can’t help it if she doesn’t know how
to act sometimes…she grew up with all of us after all.”

 

Hermione
giggled a bit. “I simply cannot imagine having to be the only girl with you
lot.” And she poked Ron playfully in the ribs.

 

Ron rubbed
his sore middle. “Yeah, but she wouldn’t even be over there if Harry would act
like a proper boyfriend. Where is he anyway?”

 

Hermione
began to squirm a bit before replying. “I’m sure he’s around.”

 

“No, I
haven’t seen him all day…he’s always running off on weekends, I know, but we
should have seen him somewhere by now. I have a bad feeling about this.”

 

“Ron, I’m
sure he’s fine.”

 

“Think about
it Mione, if everything were alright, Harry would be here with us, or with
Gin…but he’s nowhere to be found…I think we should talk to Dumbledore.”

 

“NO!”
Hermione grabbed Ron’s arm to keep him from running off.

 

“Jeez,
Hermione what’s gotten into…” Ron was cut off by Hermione fiercely kissing him
in the middle of the street. She ignored the whistles passersby were giving
them. This seemed to distract Ron, but eventually, he pulled out of the kiss
and stared at his girlfriend inquisitively.

 

“O…kay.
Mione, what was that for?”

 

She flashed
him a brilliant smile. “I need an excuse to kiss you now?”

  No
No
but….wait a second…you’re hiding something! You know where Harry is!”

 

“No I don’t”
she lied.

 

“I was
guessing before, but now I know…you’ve always been miserable at lying! Where is
he?”

 

Hermione
suddenly found the ground very interesting. ‘Damn
you Harry Potter!’ seemed to be the only thought running through her head.

 

“I…I can’t
tell you.”

 

“What?!
Bloody Hell! My girlfriend and my best friend keeping secrets from me? What’ve
I ever done for you two not to trust me?”

 

“I keep
telling Harry to tell you, but I *can’t*! It’s not my place!”

 

Ron’s eyes
suddenly flashed back to the Harry-less Ginny across the street. Immediately
his face turned scarlet and he fought to keep himself from yelling.

 

“He’s with
another girl isn’t he!? I’ll kill him!”

 

“NO! Ron I
assure you Harry is *not* with another girl!”

 

Ron was
still incensed. “Not with another girl? What’s he with then? A hippogriff?”

 

Hermione darted
her eyes around to make sure they weren’t drawing attention. “Yes Ron…now you
know…Harry’s run off with Buckbeak.”

 

“That’s not
funny Hermione; if he’s not with another girl, then….oh…god...” Ron’s face
paled and his hands hung limply at his sides.

 

Hermione
quickly went into her damage control mode and she made haste to find out what
Ron thought he knew.

 

“Oh god
what, Ron?”

 

He stood
perfectly still, looking about three inches to left of Hermione’s head, staring
blankly into space.

 

“He’s with a
boy.” It was not a question.

 

The head
girl let out a deep breath…this was not going to be pretty. If she denied it,
she’d be outright lying, and Ron was more than just her friend now…but Harry
trusted her to keep his secret. In the end, she figured it best to just tell
Ron at least a tiny bit of what was going on to alleviate his sense of
betrayal. After all…Harry James Potter got himself into this mess in the first
place, and she wasn’t about to lie down with him in this hole he had been
digging.

 

“I know he
wanted to tell you Ron…he’s just…scared.”

 

Ron sat down
with a plop right in the middle of the street, finding his knees suddenly very
weak. Hermione knelt down beside him albeit with more grace.

 

“I didn’t
want to keep it from you…it’s just that it’s not my secret. Please don’t hate
me.”

 

“I could
never hate you, Mione…it’s just…I don’t understand…how could I not know…he’s my
best mate…why wouldn’t he tell me he’s…that he’s….?”

 

Hermione simply
hugged Ron, hoping to ease some of the shock from him. They were silent for a
long moment before Ron spoke up, although muffled by his girlfriend’s hair.

 

“Mione?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Where’s
Malfoy?”

 

***************************************************************************

 

TBC

 

Whew! Long
chapter (for me anyways)….but it’s done. Please review. I need the morale.

 

Love and
Kisses,

 

Reika