Burn me alive

The next morning Harry had no idea what to expect. He barely had faith that Draco would even be there. So when he woke to an empty bed, he could hardly call himself suprised.

And when he stumbled out of the empty, yet still warm bed, to find that Draco had just gone to take a shower. He wasn't suprised either.

The blonde walked out of the shower, appearing unharmed. Harry tried to say goodmorning and Draco just ignored him to rummage through Harry's closet and find something he wasn't disgusted by.

"Mad at me?", No response.

The whole day went by like that. Harry making idle chit chat as he would walk into the room Draco was in, with himself of course as Draco would never respond.
Didn't look at Harry, didn't talk to him, didn't acknowledge his presence at all. Just went on with his day as per usual.
After about an hour Harry decided maybe he was embarassed about what he said last night and cornered the boy in the kitchen.
"You know...Draco. You weren't thinking right last night with that sleeping potion and all. So..I mean..I understand if you're."
Draco looked up, but right past Harry's right ear.
Harry scowled.
"Will you pay attention to me! I'm trying to fix-"
Draco brushed past Harry and left the kitchen. Leaving Harry to stand there wide eyed, hand still out in mid motion.

Harry quickly spun on his heels to turn and dart out of the kitchen and sprinted up the stairs, catching Draco by the shoulder and slamming him into the wall.
Nothing, absolutely nothing. No hint of Harry's existance. No "ouch" or "what's your problem!".

"Why are you ignoring me Malfoy!"

Draco continued to stare directly past Harry's right ear.
Harry grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him, the blondes head flopping backwards in a quick whip smashing against the wall. Or more specifically the corner of a picture, which fell immediately to the ground.
This apparently caught his attention. His eyes snapped up to Harrys' as his hand went to the back of his head to check for blood. Draco dragged his hand acrossed the back of his head and when it finally reached his eye sight, Harry knew he was going to vomit. Blood? How is it he always managed to hurt him so much?
"Oh god...I'm so sorry Draco-"

Draco smirked and licked the blood off of his middle finger before he balled his fist up and punch Harry squarely in the nose. Harry jerked back grabbing his face and shoving Draco back.

"What the fuck is your problem today!!!"

Draco reared back and punched him again in the jaw. This time Harry retaliated and punched Draco in the stomach. Draco, who oddly enough seemed to be waiting for it as he lifted his hand again and grabbed a fistful of Harry's hair pulling him back and smacking his head into the wall opposite Draco.
Nails, teeth, hair pulling, fists flying. But it was so wrong. So different. Harry had no idea how but, he knew he wasn't angry enough to be beating the shit out of Draco like this. Or vice versa. The whole time Draco looked like he wanted to say something. Spit something out. He was holding it back so much, what was it?
Harry grabbed Draco's hair and pulled him down onto the floor under him, pinning his wrists down with his knees, Draco violently jerked upwards freeing his hands and causing Harry to tighten his grip on his hair and pull down harder to keep him away.
Draco wrapped his arms around Harry's neck pulling Harry down to him and making a high cat like noise before finally saying,
"ah,,, Harry. Harder?" He moaned straight into Harry's ear as he wrapped his arms around Harry tighter and pulled him closer.
Harry's whole body froze.
He pulled back and looked at the blonde underneath him. Eye's closed, gnawing on his lip as it bled.

"...Is that why you were ignoring me? So I'd hit you?"

Draco opened his eyes and his smile twisted even further causing his lip to bleed more. All the bruises Harry probably just caused. All the pain he just inflicted on him. He fell right into his trap. Was it really even a trap? Harry wasn't even angry and he still started throwing punches.

Harry cupped Draco's face, releasing his hair. And swiped his thumb over Draco's lips.

"Stop biting that it'll open more."

"That's what you want though."

Harry's breath caught in his throat.

"No..it's not."

Draco smirked again and picked his head up, catching Harry's finger in his mouth and sucking the blood off the tip. Affective as it was he just ended up with even more blood on it when it left his mouth. Draco tipped his head back and laughed. Why would that make him so happy?

'He's lost his mind...' Harry thought as Draco quickly stopped laughing and launched himself forward latching his lips onto Harry's.
Harry never took the time out to think about it, but Draco tasted like tears. And for some odd reason, that didn't bother him. Nothing bothered him as he felt Draco tip his head up to just slip his bottom lip into Harry's mouth and he became completely lost in the taste of warm salty pennies. Blood. Thick and hot and alive. Living. That's what he was doing now wasn't it? Not surviving day by day but really LIVING with Draco. He forgot that blood came from wounds and wounds hurt and he caused them. He forgot Draco was ill and didn't need to be further damaged. He forgot that he himself was ill and didn't need to be further pushed in the wrong direction. One that scared him to pieces.

Harry completely ignored the little voice in the back of his head that he was slowly drownding in Draco's blood who told him not to. To stop because he must've been hurting him! After all, wasn't that the point?
Draco whimpered and pressed into Harry more, re-wrapping his arms around him. Harry sat up, Draco in his lap with his legs wrapped around his waist. Hands on Draco's back bracing the boy as Draco slipped his tongue into Harry's mouth, unwrapping his legs and straddling either side of Harry as he began pulling the boy who lived's shirt over his head, breaking the kiss momentarily.

Draco opened his eyes as he began to feel nails diggin into his back to see Harry's eyes were already open, and watching Draco's face very intently.
He moved his mouth down to Harry's neck and bit down as hard as he could, causing Harry to buck his chest out, arching his back and gritting his teeth. Harry couldn't decide what to make of that feeling... In his mind he knew it hurt, he knew teeth and skin meant pain. But at the same time... Not necessarily. Draco cupped the back of Harry's neck and sunk his teeth in even more, finally breaking the skin.

"Ah, Fuck, Draco..." Harry panted.

Draco licked the broken skin before looking up into Harry's eyes.

"I like your eyes like this best...They're dark. And hungry." Draco chuckled. He ran his hands down Harry's bare back, fingers bumping over muscle covered ribs that still managed to protrude.

Harry leaned forward and licked blood away from the corner of Draco's mouth, the blondes eyes slipped shut and he dragged a hand over the buldge in Harry's pants.
Harry pressed the side of his face into Draco's and hummed his appreciation for the action. Draco's breath went ragged as Harry dug his nails into the boys back and ripped around to the front.

"..mm..more..."He stood on his knees scooting Harry into the wall behind them pulling on Harry's hair and reaching behind himself with the other hand to pick up a piece of broken glass from the picture that had fallen.
He shoved it into one of Harry's hands. Harry's hands which began to violently shake when he realized what he was asking him to do.

Draco slid down Harry's torso, rubbing his hips into the boy as he slid down to sit in his lap.
"Please Harry. Please" He moaned into Harry's ear, still pulling on his hair.

Harry shakily took the broken glass and dug the dull tip into Draco's chest and Draco tugged hard on Harry's hair causing Harry to press harder as he slid it down Draco's torso. A red, angry looking scratch formed behind the glass that Harry saw for a fleeting moment as the shirt slid back down re-covering it. Obviously this shirt would pose a problem! Harry took the glass and ripped straight down it. Making short work of peeling it off of Draco afterwards.

All those scars.

A pin prick of blood became visible and Harry dropped the piece of glass on the floor. He shoved Draco out of his lap and darted into the bathroom where he began thoroughly splashing his face with cold water mumbling,
"I can't do this."

Draco walked up to the door frame, torn shirt in his hand.

"You seemed perfectly fine with my hand in your pants Potter"

"Draco I'm not going to fucking cut you ok? This is WRONG. It's disgusting! There's nothing normal about it!"

Draco took a few steps back, wrapping his arms around himself.

"Terribly sorry." Draco spat throwing the torn shirt at Harry as the boy stood from bending over the sink, face dripping and glasses off.

Draco stomped into Harry's room and threw several things out of his closet before he found a shirt he apparently didn't hate.

"I didn't mean to disgust you. How silly of me to think that Harry Potter would have anything to do with something as..." Draco turned around, arms through the shirt about to put his head through. He looked straight at Harry in disgusted hurt.
"as USED as me. It was plain ridiculous! Why, I'm disgusting!" Draco threw the shirt on over his head and stormed past Harry holding back his sobs. He knew his face would be red by the time he got outside. All he had to do was keep it together and not cry until he got out of the house.

"...Draco I didn't say YOU were disgusting. I said THIS is disgusting."

"Then you think IM disgusting because THIS is part of ME." Draco turned around halfway down the stairs and screamed it in Harry's direction. His face was soaking and he cursed himself for not being able to hold it off.

"I didn't ask for this Potter." Draco's face scrunched up as the tears started comming more.

"Do you think I bloody ENJOY being a freak? I try to! I try to just take it because that's the way that I am now but it's damn near impossible with you sitting there telling me how horribly wrong it is, how horribly wrong I am every five minutes. I'd love to disassociate pleasure and pain and like girls and start a family and do all that typical bullshit. You can go out to some club and pick up some bloke that you feel like banging and have a good time. I have to find someone who's willing to fucking burn me or cut me and not be a sociopath who wouldn't stop if i said to."

Draco just stood there staring at Harry, bracing himself with one hand on each wall and catching his breath and drying his face.

Silence. Harry had nothing to say? The boy who lived and made speeches once a month to news papers since the end of the war had nothing to say?

"I'll leave you alone and take my insanity somewhere else. You shouldn't have to deal with it." Draco spat at the floor before Harry quickly took out his wand,

"Stupify"

He walked over and picked Draco up.

"I'm going to put you in bed, and I'm going to let you decide whether or not you want to be healed before we go to sleep tonight. You can have a sleeping potion if you want. But I'm not going to let you go out there..."
He deposited the boy in the bed and released him from the spell. Leaning down to swipe a piece of hair out of his face,
"To those sociopaths who don't stop when you say no." He touched his nose to Draco's.
"And those horrid people who make you feel disgusting. And tell you you're wrong when you can't help it... I want to help you Draco."
"I'm not your project Harry, and there's nothing to help me with. This is me. This is how I am. And if you dislike it then please just tell me to leave."
Harry turned the light out and crawled in bed next to Draco.

"You can be my cigarette...But as of right now I don't smoke..."
Draco put his head in the crook of Harry's neck.
"I can work on that."