Paralyzer

Disclaimer: Don’t own them, don’t own princess Tutu either except on DVD.



A/N: Hey all, Monday rolls around again, and you know what that means right? Update time! Let’s recap! Dumbledore, old tricky coot that he is, has arranged for Harry, Draco and various others to be the new teachers at Hogwarts due to all of the other professors leaving en masse to take their much needed sabbatical. Among these various others are Jem, Bob and Helga, a strange and powerful trio from America, at least, most recently from America, who have kindly offered to help Dumbledore in his time of need. But do they have a hidden agenda? And why are Draco and Harry acting out a scene from Princess Tutu after having coffee in Jem’s suite?? What the hell is going on?! Let’s find out!



Chapter 6, “Uh………..”



Ginny had seen plenty of strange things in her life, but nothing, absolutely nothing, compared to the sight of Draco Malfoy in a pink and white Tutu surrounded by flowers, holding the hand of her boyfriend Harry who was cradling a baby bird to his chest wearing nothing but a nightshirt that barely covered his thighs. Then the bird flew away again and slowly, the looks of love and adoration the two were exchanging morphed, first into confusion.



“Uh……..” Harry started.



“Uh………….” Draco began at the same time.



“Uh………………….” Ginny blinked, looking between the two of them. Then came embarrassment.



“Uh……..” Harry said again, this time with a distinct red tint to his face, tugging on the short night shirt.



“Uh…………” Draco fumbled, trying to pull down the back of his tutu since he could feel a distinct breeze brushing past his bottom.



“Uh…………” Ginny squeaked, when Draco pulling down the back of the tutu pushed up the front and revealed the impression of a rather large bulge forming underneath and Harry tugging on his shirt caused the buttons to pop open, revealing EVERYTHING. Next on the list was anger.



“What the hell Malfoy!?” Harry shouted, hastily trying to rebutton and gain some semblance of modesty. “What the HELL was that all about!?”



“How the fuck should I know, Potter?! Why don’t you tell me??” Draco snapped back, unable to gain any modesty at all in the strange taffeta outfit.



“Because you’re the one that did this!” Harry shouted angrily. Draco just stared at him blankly and Harry lost steam, “Uh…..didn’t you?”



“Like hell I did!” Draco snorted, “You really think I would be the one in the tutu if this was MY idea?!”



“Oh yeah, like I’d really throw myself out a window if it was mine?!” Harry retorted, and then as one they both looked at Ginny.



“I didn’t do it!” she barked, then paused and added truthfully, “I mean yeah, now that Harry isn’t falling out of the window it seems really funny…..but I just got here!”



“Well if you didn’t do it and we didn’t do it, then who did?” Draco asked, slightly calmer but still rather chilly and therefore irritated. “And how did we get here in the first place? Last thing I remember was heading for a nap after we had coffee with…..”



Both boys shared a look of understanding and then were running off back to the castle. Ginny admired the view for a moment then ran after them, “Wait up! Wait! Had coffee with who??”



“Jem!” Harry and Draco said together, but whether in answer to her question or because Jem, Bob and Helga were sitting on the steps of the castle she wasn’t sure until, “What the hell was in that coffee?!?”



Jem looked up from her book and snorted, putting her hand over her mouth and nose, as if to stop the raccous laughter that burst forth a moment later. Helga too was laughing, and rolling around on the ground, and even Robert seemed to be holding back a chuckle or two. “Sorry!” Jem gasped a moment later, between guffaws, “I was just trying to help….”



“How is this helping?” Draco asked, gesturing to the toole and taffeta monstrosity.



“And how is falling out of an eighth story window helping?!” Harry asked less calmly, pointing back at the astronomy tower.



“Well, you two seem to be at odds with each other, and sometimes the best way to resolve discord is to go through a life changing experience together, in this case, a near-death rescue.” Jem said, suddenly calm.



Harry and Draco were both glaring at the blonde woman so it was left to Ginny to ask the most vital question, “Ok, that makes sense, but uh……why the tutu?”



“I told them I liked anime,” Jem shrugged as if to say ‘isn’t it obvious?’, “those costumes just happen to be from my favorite, Princess Tutu.”



“Oh! That’s what Draco said before he started spinning in circles and made all those flowers show up,” Ginny said, putting two and two together to make seven. Harry and Draco switched their glares to her. “What? You did, you shouted out, ‘because I’m princess tutu,’ and then started dancing.” She insisted.



“Of course, because that’s what Princess Tutu DOES.” Jem nodded, “See?” Insane woman code for, ‘doesn’t it all make sense now?’ “no, no,” she added, holding up her hands when Harry stepped forward a little, “You don’t have to thank me, I was just trying to make everything more pleasant around here.”



“I could have died!” Harry shouted angrily, but he backed up again when Robert stood and glared down at him.



“Yes, but Draco saved you,” Jem pointed out again, ignoring her bodyguard. “He didn’t drink his coffee nearly as fast as you did, so he probably could have fought off the spell and let you fall to your doom if he wanted to, but he didn’t. You owe him gratitude at least since you don’t seem to want to give me any.”



Harry felt a twitch starting just beneath his left eye, and took a step forward again, bodyguard be damned, but Ginny’s arm shot out and grabbed the back of his shirt, stopping him. “I’m sure they’d both be much more grateful if they weren’t wearing such…uh….impractical clothing.” She said.



“Oh alright,” Jem rolled her eyes and then snapped her fingers and the boys were suddenly dressed properly again.



Helga stuck out her tongue at them all, “Awww, no fun!” she whined and sat up, clearly sulking. “You looked so cute in that tutu! I never knew boys could have such feminine legs!” Now Draco was the one stepping forward, Robert probably wouldn’t stop someone smacking the annoying purple one, right? But Ginny grabbed him too and he stopped.



“Right, well, thanks for your concern, but I think what these two need is a good long talk to work out their issues….and I’ll mediate….we’ll go do that right now, in their room…..” Ginny said, edging the boys around the trio and up the stairs, switching her hold to their wrists and pulling them along behind her. “Geez…..” she muttered once they were inside the castle and out of earshot. “Is it just me or is that chick crazy?”



“Crazy.” Harry and Draco said at the same time. Harry glared at Draco, who was quite happily holding HIS girlfriend’s hand, and then stared a hole in the back of Ginny’s head for the rest of the trip up to their room. She WOULD explain what was going on or….well….he’d….spontanteously combust. He had tried to come up with a good threat in his mind, but couldn’t think of anything that wouldn’t hurt him just as much if not more.



Ginny sat them both down on the black couch in the shared living room and plopped herself between them. Since the couch was more of a small two seater this meant that she was rather squished in the middle, but that was fine with her. Harry wasn’t too happy with her close proximity to Draco, she could tell, but he wouldn’t get over it. “Right then,” she said, “Now that the drama portion of today’s program is over, let’s get down to the nitty gritty of it alright?”



“Alright,” Draco said, not bothering to try and scoot away from her. It was rather nice having one side of her pressed so tightly against him. He did turn a little though so that he was at a better angle to ‘discuss’ things with Harry.



“Fine,” Harry said, eyes narrowed at Draco rubbing against Ginny’s shoulder. He grabbed her around the waist and pulled her up onto his lap, but she didn’t seem to get why and put her feet across Draco’s lap with a big grin. “Gin….” He started.



“Don’t even start Harry, Draco is my friend.” Ginny said, cutting him off before he could make an ass out of himself. “We’ve been pen pals since Charlie’s wedding two years ago and I didn’t tell you because you didn’t ask who I was writing to, even when I wrote letters in front of you. I probably should have told you anyway, but I didn’t because I didn’t want to make you angry, so my bad. I’m sorry.”



“You’re friends with Malfoy?” Harry said slowly, not really angry persay, but put out, jealous and a little hurt she hadn’t told him.



“Yes, and I’d really like you to be friends as well, since I plan on hanging out with him now that he’s back in England. I’d PREFER it if we could all hang out together, which is why I sent you to his club the other night, but either you acted like a jerk or he did, so that was a wash, but I don’t want to have to chose one of you over the other. I mean, if I had to, obviously, I would choose you Harry because I love you and you’re my boyfriend, but Draco is my FRIEND and I do want to talk to him.” Ginny said, looking down rather bashfully.



This extremely un-Ginny like behavior threw Harry for a loop and he hugged her tightly, “Of course Ginny, I would never say you couldn’t talk to the git, I mean Draco, I’m just a little upset you didn’t tell me earlier that you were talking is all.” He assured her.



“Really?” Ginny sniffled, still looking down.



“Really.” Harry said, glancing at Draco who was keeping his face purposefully expressionless.



“So….you’ll try to be friends then?” Ginny twisted to look up at him through her batted eyelashes, “Please?”



“Uh…..well….how bout I just promise not to hex him to kingdom come every time I see him?” Harry asked, unsure whether ‘friends’ was ever something he and Draco could be.



“Please Harry? Please try?” Ginny pleaded, eyelash flutter flutter. “For me?”



“Uh….alright….anything for you Gin….” Harry sighed and glared at Draco, daring him to say anything, sure a ‘whipped’ comment was forthcoming.



Of course, normally, Draco would have jumped on the chance to take the mickey out of Harry for acquiescing to Ginny’s sad pouty act but he didn’t say anything like that. “So I don’t have a say in the matter?” Was what Draco DID say, teasingly.



“Nope,” Ginny said, all smiles and bounciness again, kicking him with her heel gently, “You two are going to be friends, and we three are going to have great fun together.” Harry was rolling his eyes so he missed the wink and smirk that the other two were sharing, both having the same idea of what exactly that ‘fun’ would be. Ginny thinking it because, well, she was Ginny, and Draco having caught onto her train of thought because one of the feet that was on his lap was brushing purposefully against his….inseam….



“Well at least I know Ginny’s game,” he thought as he smirked at her, “Now how do we get Harry to play?” He turned his smirk to a smile when Harry turned to stare at him, “So then Harry, friends?” He extended his hand.



“Yeah, friends.” Harry said grudgingly sticking out his own hand which Draco shook and seemed to hold for a moment longer than really necessary, smiling strangely, almost feral, at him. “What’s with that look Mal-Draco?” he asked suspiciously when Draco still hadn’t released his hand.



“Oh nothing, just thinking of how mouthwateringly tousled you looked in that nightshirt,” Draco answered truthfully, rubbing a small circle on the back of Harry’s hand with his thumb.



“Yeah and you looked like a giant flaming poof in that tutu!” Harry snapped, snatching his hand back and rubbing it on the sofa. Draco only shrugged and leaned back against the arm of the couch, smiling still. It was quite a good look on him, much better than the evil Malfoy smirk, and Draco was quite the appealing specimen….Harry had gotten the feeling in the nightclub that Draco was bi if not outright gay, but that smile combined with the comment and the thumb rub…he suddenly shot up from the couch, dumping Ginny on the floor, “I’m going to go work on my lesson plan,” he announced unnecessarily and turned, marching into his room awkwardly because of a growing problem. Draco was hot and all, but Harry was dating Ginny and Draco was an ass, most of the time….and he had a great ass too… “No, stop that brain!” Harry ordered silently, smacking his head with the heel of his palm. Then he pointed at his ‘problem’ and added, “And you behave yourself!’



***************



“What was that all about?” Ginny grumbled as she picked herself up off the floor and sat on the couch again, looking over at the door Harry had just gone through.



“Oh the usual I suppose Ginny,” Draco laughed, “My charms were too much for him to handle.”



Ginny laughed too and put her legs back across Draco’s lap, “Were you actually trying to seduce him or were you trying to rile him up? Because if you were just trying to mess with his head, I think you succeeded.”



Draco raised an eyebrow, “And if I was trying to seduce him?”



“Then you’re going about it the wrong way,” Ginny shrugged, “Harry’s sweet but dense as a brick when it comes to acting out his impulses. If you want in his pants, you’re going to have to be much more obvious about it.”



“And am I correct in assuming you would be alright with me ‘getting in his pants’ Ginny?” Draco asked, eyebrow still raised.



“Sure,” Ginny beamed at him, “I mean, I’m way too jealous for my own good, so I would probably never accept another girl vying for his attention, and if I didn’t know ahead of time that a guy was going for him I might get upset, but I’d rather it was a guy than a girl. I’m not too worried about other girls now that he’s here and will still see me every day, but before he got asked to be a teacher I was going to have you seduce him. You don’t like to get emotionally attached and you could keep him away from all those damned gold diggers who want him for his money and his fame.” She said this truthfully and unflinchingly, one of the qualities Draco admired about her.



“And why are YOU with him, if not for those things?” Draco asked, not to be mean, but out of curiosity. “Other than his simply stellar physique I mean.”



“Because I love him,” Ginny said simply, “Always have, and I THINK he loves me too, but all the same, I’d have felt better knowing his attention was occupied elsewhere while we were apart.”



“And now? Surely you don’t need me to keep the vixens away from him anymore.” Draco pointed out, determined to make her think this all the way through before he made a play for the sexy Gryffindor in the other room.



“Now? Well, you’re hot, he’s hot, and you both swing both ways….I figured it would make this school year more fun….” Ginny shrugged.



Draco smirked, “So you want me to swing your way too, is that it?” he asked, sliding his hand up the leg resting on his lap.



She batted his hand away playfully, “Not until I find out how Harry feels about an open relationship….or at the very least a less closed one,” she amended, since in a truly open relationship Harry could run after girls too and that was exactly what she DIDN’T want. “But if he’s alright with it, then yes definitely.” She winked at him and nudged his crotch again with her foot before standing up, “I think I’ll go talk with him right now as a matter of fact….”



“Don’t ‘TALK’ too long Gin,” Draco teased, “He does have a lesson plan to make up you know.”



“So do you!” she responded, sticking out her tongue, “And you don’t have the excuse of a sexy redhead on your lap anymore, so get to work!”



“Yes ma’am,” Draco laughed and headed to his own room. Ginny waited till he’d shut the door then knocked on Harry’s. It was time the two of them had a little talk….after she punished him for dumping her so unceremoniously on the floor that is.



A/N: Sorry its so short today, but I’m busy! Smut next chapter, of the hetero variety, and maybe a little bit of slash….definitely by chapter after next though! Review please, I live and breathe reviews, and right now I’m suffocating from the lack!