Healing

Authors Note: Thanks to my beta Alexandra. She's fabulous! Here we get a little peek into Draco

Chapter 6 Resolve

“Ron… What the fuck are you doing here?” Harry shouted.

“I think I could ask you the same thing.” Ron spat. He had turned around to face the wall while the man Harry had brought home scrambled to find his clothing.

“What I do in my own flat is my own business, Ron,” Harry hissed. The man was mostly clothed and walking past Ron out the door.

“Apparently it shouldn’t be if you are going to keep up with these massive downward spirals. Are you really so desperate for attention that you would degrade yourself this way?” Ron asked, turning to face Harry.

He stopped and covered his eyes when he noticed that Harry had not attempted to dress. “Harry, for Merlin’s sake, put some clothes on,” Ron muttered.

“Why? Are you uncomfortable?” Harry asked mockingly.

“Yes,” Ron shouted.

“Then get the hell out,” Harry said and walked toward the kitchen, away from his clothes, Ron noted.

“I’m not leaving, Harry. You need help!” he shouted through the flat. He wasn’t going to chase a naked Harry into the kitchen.

“I’m just fine. I don’t know why you’re so concerned anyway. You and Hermione made it pretty clear you were through with me years ago,” Harry said. “Why are you even here?”

“Ginny’s getting married,” Ron said.

Harry could hear the happiness in his voice and felt a twinge of jealousy. He hadn’t wanted to be with Ginny, but her impending nuptials closed a chapter of Harry’s life firmly shut. The family life he had always wanted was gone.

“I’m happy for her,” Harry said, not really feeling it. “It’s Neville I assume?”

Neville and Ginny had become inseparable after their time at Hogwarts the year of the war. They had grown so close during that time, and Ginny had gone to him for comfort when she and Harry broke up. They had announced their dating status shortly before Harry isolated himself.

“Yeah, of course it’s Neville, but you would already know that if you came to a Sunday dinner or two,” Ron muttered.

Harry laughed and he sounded like a crazed man. “You and I both know that things are better for you and your family without me around.”

“Just let us help you, Harry. We can all get through this together, whatever you are going through, we’ll help,” Ron said sincerely.

“I’m already getting help,” Harry replied.

“Really?” Ron asked, both surprised and skeptical. “Because what I just saw didn’t really look like it.”

“I’m gay, Ron,” Harry scoffed. “It’s something I realized in… therapy.”

Ron nearly bowled over laughing. “What kind of therapy would make you think that? What is it, Malfoy’s Path to Mental Health? Chapter one, how to be a proper whore,” he said between laughter.

Harry was silent and Ron blanched. “You’re kidding right? It’s not Malfoy. Please tell me you’re not seeking help from the Ferret,” Ron said, his voice laced with disgust.

“You lost the right to give me advice a long time ago, Ron. You and Hermione abandoned me. I was too difficult and I ruined your happy little lives. Draco’s helping me now, so you can just go,” he said spitefully.

“Oh, so it’s Draco now?” Ron spat.

Harry thought about it for a moment and nodded. “Yeah, I suppose it is.”

“For Merlin’s sake Harry, can’t you see he’s fucking with you? How can you let him tell you that you’re gay? After all the girls you’ve dated, you’re Harry bloody Potter,” Ron shouted.

“I know I’ve slept with women, but none of them have made me feel the way I do with Draco,” Harry said honestly.

“What? You’re sleeping with the ferret?” Ron started shaking his head in confusion and anger. “This is too much, Harry. He’s using you. He’s probably fucking you and going back to tell his Slytherin mates how he made the great savior beg for it,” he spat.

“I don’t care what Draco thinks about me,” Harry lied. “The point is, he’s doing for me what you and Hermione never could,” he said. His voice was soft and broken. “Just… just go, Ron. Tell Gin and Neville I’m happy for them.”

Harry didn’t wait for Ron to argue, he just turned around and padded to his room, shutting and locking the door behind him.

When he heard the outside door slam shut, he knew that Ron had left and he went out to collect his clothes. He needed to vent, he needed the calming white noise to take over his mind, and he only knew of one person who could help him with that.

--

Draco was pacing the living room of his flat still dressed in the red and black leather he had been wearing at the club. He had nearly followed Potter home that night, and that was unacceptable.

He had just assured Lexi earlier that day that his relationship with Potter was purely professional. No feelings.

And it was true, mostly.

He desperately wanted Harry to get better, to feel whole and to leave the program and go on with his life. That’s what Draco was there for, to facilitate the change. He always called Potter his client, but in a way, he was more like a patient. They all were. They all needed something in order to repair their broken hearts or minds and Draco found that something and provided it.

After time the patient would heal and they would no longer have a need for the company’s services. Harry was on track. He would heal and he would leave and Draco would have a new patient in his stead.

Something went wrong with this one though.

Draco had helped countless clients through these same issues. Potter was no different, just a stronger case. Stronger because of who he was and what he had to do in the war. It should have been textbook, but Draco messed up.

He didn’t know if it was because of his history with Harry, or because of the challenges the case posed to him, but Draco started having feelings for his formal rival.

It started simple enough. Draco felt pity for him. The man had been thrust a duty, which would most likely kill him, at the age of eleven. He lost so many people, and blamed himself for every death. That wasn’t so unusual though, because most of his patients blamed themselves for the deaths of their loved ones in the war. The main difference was that Potter had a valid point. It was his war. Voldemort sought him out for whatever reason and waged a war against Harry directly.

Of course the deaths were still in no way Potter’s fault. It was just a thousand times harder to convince him of it than it would be to a normal patient.

In a way Potter was right when he had accused him earlier that day. Draco had needed to establish that Harry was gay, and needed Potter to accept it. Accepting himself for who he was was the first part of healing. But Draco could have gone about it in another way. It would have taken longer surely, but Draco didn’t do what he did as a short cut, he did it because he wanted to.

When he looked into Potter’s eyes while he was touching his scars… he had wanted him. The want filled him and since Potter had been willing, he let the want carry him away. Draco had applied all of his self-control to stop when he did and not just take Potter over the desk.

Then that night, he had watched Potter lustfully while Potter looked on at the scene in the cage. He should have walked away the minute he saw him there, but something made him stay, and that same something made him reach out and touch Harry.

And what was that burning jealousy when Potter left with someone else?

It was against all the rules, not to mention morally and ethically wrong, as Lexi was quick to point out. She had given him the option that day of giving Potter over to one of the other healers. She said that Draco was free to date him if he wanted, but not while he was a patient of his. He had laughed and told her she was being ridiculous and that he would never nor could ever date Harry Potter.

It was the truest thing he had said to her during that conversation.

Harry was the white picket fence guy. The one who wanted the wife, the three-point-two children, the family dog and the cottage by the sea, and when none of that happened for him, he crumbled.

That was his biggest problem. Harry wanted a normal life, but he wasn’t normal, at least not that kind of normal. As soon as he realized this, then the healing process could begin and Harry could move on.

He would find a nice loyal boyfriend and settle down and maybe even get the dog and the cottage.

Draco couldn’t offer him any of that, so it would be unfair for him to act out his feelings any further.

He had just calmed himself down and steeled his resolve when the metallic knock sounded through his flat.

Authors Note: As always I love to hear what you think! Please review