Who am I really?
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Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Snape
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Adult ++
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8
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Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Snape
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
8
Views:
14,981
Reviews:
77
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Begin the way you wish to go forth
Title: Who am I really?
Summary: AU!! “You cannot be Harry Potter. Harry Potter died thirteen years ago, along with his parents. Only his twin brother survived, ‘Theodore Potter’.”
Disclaimer: Harry Potter does not belong to me. This magical world and everything in it belongs to JK Rowling and her publishers.
Warnings: Okay, this will be a BDSM fic, for certain, but only later on in the fic. This is Snarry slash, Snape will be the Dominant but it will be very different from ‘Life as I know it’, Harry will stand up for himself more…
AN: I apologize for not updating this in like, forever!!! Have no excuse other than I lost interest in the fic but I hope that with the ideas running through my head and all of YOUR help, it won’t happen again. :)
Important AN: I’m going to make Harry/Raymond’s birthday beginning of June for this fic. He will learn from Severus that his actual birthday is 31 July but as he has always celebrated it on the 3rd of June, he will continue to do so – also to fit in with his new persona.
Severus smiled as he thought of what the evening would deliver. Who would win the word game tonight? Even though he had won each previous game, it was getting harder to beat the boy and Severus dreaded the day that the brat would be the one to go to bed triumphant in the knowledge that he had outsmarted his professor. His Professor!
Maybe he should invest in a dictionary for himself?
Chapter 6: Begin the way you wish to go forth.
The first of September crept up on Raymond like a thief in the night and it was with quite a shock that he realized he would be meeting his schoolmates that evening.
The past eight weeks had been the most amazing, most tiring, most liberating and most frustrating of his life.
He had come to really enjoy his time with Professor Snape and was sad to realize that their one-on-one sessions would end now that the other students would also be there.
He had met most of the other Professors during the previous week as they came back from their vacations or family visits.
Professor Moody was downright intimidating and Raymond stayed away from the man as much as possible. Something about the Professor just didn’t sit well with him but Raymond had yet to raise the subject with Professor Snape.
His respect for Professor Snape and the work he did had grown exponentially over the last few weeks and Raymond could almost imagine the man a friend – if Raymond was inclined to have friends, which he was NOT!
It had been decided that he would stay in his quarters in the dungeons even after he was sorted into a house as he still had a lot of catching up to do and would be taking extra lessons in the evening from various Professors.
The headmaster – whom had not spoken to him more than twice in the eight weeks he’d been there – had arranged with some of the Professors to give him one-on-one tutoring in order to get him up to the standard the rest of his year mates were on.
Professor Snape and he had finished the second year syllabus just the day before and Raymond was both anxious and excited to find out what the third year work would hold.
Professor Snape had told him that the potions became a lot more time consuming and volatile in third year and by fourth year only those who really had an aptitude in the specific art would be able to do well. It was Professor Snape’s own way of filtering out the students who had the skill and ability necessary for potions making from those who were looking to score an easy grade. Which was something that had never happened in his class. Those who received a passing grade really deserved it.
Raymond was determined to be one of those and he worked hard to prove himself to the Professor.
Something else that he would sorely miss was their nightly chats. It had become routine for the two of them to sit and discuss their day over a cup of tea in Raymond’s room. The Professor took this opportunity to tell Raymond more about the school, the students and the other Professors as well as explaining to him in great detail the amount of ‘dunderheads’ that lived at the school.
Raymond had fallen out of his chair laughing when the Professor told him of a boy named Creevey who wet his pants when the Professor one day walked passed him in the hall way.
That was not something that generally would bring forth this kind of behavior from students so when Raymond asked Professor Snape why the boy had reacted that way, the Professor had replied that he had done nothing more than smile at the boy.
Raymond, who had gotten to know the Professor very well by then could not help but laugh at the picture. Yes, a smiling Snape was certainly something to be afraid of. The only reason that his Professor would smile was if he had really enjoyed marking an essay and the essay writer in question happened across his way.
Professor Snape had then passed Raymond a copy of the essay in question which was what caused him to fall off his chair and roll on the floor helplessly.
Yes, Snape would definitely smile while imagining Creevey’s face blanching when he realized his mistake. It was so much fun to toy with young people’s emotions!
Raymond thought back on that essay and couldn’t help but laugh again when he remembered what Snape had written.
Flashback
Raymond took the essay from his Professor with a wary look but once he scanned over the red markings that dominated the page he took a deep breath and read over them again, slowly this time.
No Mr Creevey, I am afraid that you are very much mistaken if you think that adding crushed Belladonna would make this calming draught stronger and longer lasting.
While it certainly makes the potion stronger and a LOT longer lasting, it also changes the properties of the potion completely, thus creating a whole new potion.
While I am sure that you love to indulge yourself in this activity, please keep it out of my classroom. I have no great wish to see twenty thirteen year olds discovering the precise effect of one of the strongest known aphrodisiacs in the world.
You’d have quite a time to keep young Miss Weasley off your person and while you might like that idea, I assure you that no one else shares your sentiments.
In future, be sure to write any essays when you are not… frustrated.
End Flashback
Oh yes, Raymond could see just how a young boy would react to that and could not fault his Professor for smiling at the young man in question.
Now Raymond just wished he had been there to see that smile as he still had not managed to erase that smirk from the man’s face without it turning into a snarl or blank look.
Maybe he should incorporate the word he had learned the previous night into one of his sentences and see what the man made of that…
*----------------------------------------------------------------------*
Raymond forced himself to stand still while he listened to the Headmaster welcome the students back and introducing the new first years.
It was a long wait as Raymond listened while the hat sorted each kid.
Professor Snape had told him that he would be introduced as a new student who had been home schooled. While the ‘relation’ between himself and the Professor would not be mentioned, some of the students might be able to make the connection and Raymond prepared himself for their questions.
Professor Snape had been made his legal guardian within his first week at the castle and though Raymond had at first been skeptic about it, he could not be more grateful now. Snape was the only adult he trusted with his safety. He had not come so far as to trust the man with his past just yet but he frightened himself by sometimes thinking of confiding in the man.
His past was his past and that is where it would stay. Or so he told himself everyday.
The Professor hadn’t mentioned the incident where he had blown the cauldron up again but Raymond could not forget about it or what the Professor had said that day.
He knew now that the man hadn’t meant to scare him or even yell at him – he realized that he had scared the Professor that day which was why the man had grabbed him and yelled at him.
His thoughts were brought back to the present when the Headmaster said his name and Raymond realized with a start that it was his turn.
The curious faces all turned to him as he made his way up to the stool with the hat on. He picked the old thing up and lowered it onto his head.
Even though he knew what to expect – courtesy of Professor Snape – the voice sounding through his head was still a shock to the system.
Ah, Mr McShane. Such a shame that you have to hide who you really are. Such a shame…
But, this is for the best, yes!
Now, let’s get back to business, eh? Hmmm, difficult. Yes, yes, I know that synonyms to that are ‘complicated’ and ‘tricky’, no need to try and drag me into this game of yours – you will lose, believe me.
Hmmm… You have a thirst for knowledge that would do any Ravenclaw proud. No? You don’t wish to be placed there? Oh, I see, like a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Hmmm, not a bad idea, not a bad idea at all.
Hufflepuff is definitely out of the question. You’d be bored stiff and would most likely lash out at those who wish to help. No, no, better not.
Gryffindor would be even worse. Not only is your brother in that house but the way your mind works is just way too complex for those in that house.
So Slytherin it is then, eh? Your guardian is Head of that House yes, yes. It’s a good choice, certainly the best choice for your particular ‘conduct’ – look that word up when you get a chance, I don’t have time to explain.
Ravenclaw would be my first choice but yes, I can see why you would wish to go elsewhere. One would not expect someone with as sharp a mind as yours to be in any house other than Ravenclaw.
While Slytherins and Ravenclaws are much alike, Slytherins are more ambitious and most of the time more vicious in their actions. They are not stupid, not in the least, but even though they have the drive and the thirst for knowledge that Ravenclaws have, they usually take a bit longer to achieve their goals.
So Slytherin it is then?
Yes, yes, no need to be tetchy! Severus is rubbing off on you – and no, that is NOT a compliment!
Fine, fine!
SLYTHERIN!!
The last word was shouted out loud and Raymond snatched the hat off his head before throwing it unceremoniously on the stool.
Turning around he caught Severus’s eye and the arched eyebrow but only snarled in response which elicited the other eyebrow as well.
Making his way over to the Slytherin table, Raymond seated himself in the first available seat – which just happened to be amongst the first years – and grabbed a plate where he then proceeded to fill it with a scrumptious meal.
The first years on either side of him moved their chairs away from him a bit before settling down. Raymond had no problem guessing that their behavior was due to the scowl on his face.
Why exactly the hat had wanted to draw the whole thing out for as long as it had was beyond him. He only knew that it had taken a lot longer than he had wished and was thus now in a very bad mood.
He hated drawing attention to himself!
*--------------------------------------------------------------------*
“Care to tell me just what exactly the hat had to say that put you in such a foul mood?”
Raymond blinked up at his Professor. He had not expected the man that evening. With school starting the next day he had assumed that their nightly visits would come to an end. Of course, the Professor knew his password and could enter at any time but Raymond had not thought that he would actually do so.
He was really not in the mood to explain everything to the Professor and so he settled on doing what he had decided to do earlier that day:
Attempt to shock the Professor’s smirk right off his face!
“No, I do not Professor. Now, if you would kindly take your execrable self and leave my quarters, I would be much obliged.”
Raymond made sure that he watched his Professor closely while he said this as he didn’t want to miss even the slightest change in expression.
He knew that the Professor would not take offence at what he said as the man knew that Raymond was determined to win one of their word games.
Frustration boiled up in him as the Professor merely blinked for an extended moment before turning his smirk into an even more menacing look and bowing sarcastically at him while backing towards the door.
Raymond knew he would tell his Professor what the hat had said eventually – maybe even that weekend – but for now, he just wanted to be left alone.
Once again, Raymond wished he had access to a camera but he knew that even if he had one, it would not work in the castle. This was one of the things he wanted to work on during the school year. Why should they not make use of the technologies that others provide them with?
He was pretty sure that the Professor did not know the meaning of the word ‘execrable’ and wished he was there when the man realized just exactly what it meant.
Tempted as he had been to shout at the man that “It means you are deplorable, miserable, woeful and wretched”, he still valued his life and though he knew that the Professor could take a lot – even insults to his face – he, Raymond, could never do that to the man. That he had called him execrable to his face was bad enough and Raymond knew he would apologize to the man when he saw him next.
*-----------------------------------------------------------------*
Severus paged through his newly acquired dictionary which already looked flayed at some pages until he found the word he was looking for.
Reading through the meanings, Severus was at first enraged by what he found but then found himself smirking – that the boy had said such a thing to his face was an accomplishment on its own. That the boy had said it while being rude already was testament to the tentative trust between the two.
Severus vowed to himself that he would not break that trust. Not even to spare his own dignity.
End Chapter 6
Review please!!
Summary: AU!! “You cannot be Harry Potter. Harry Potter died thirteen years ago, along with his parents. Only his twin brother survived, ‘Theodore Potter’.”
Disclaimer: Harry Potter does not belong to me. This magical world and everything in it belongs to JK Rowling and her publishers.
Warnings: Okay, this will be a BDSM fic, for certain, but only later on in the fic. This is Snarry slash, Snape will be the Dominant but it will be very different from ‘Life as I know it’, Harry will stand up for himself more…
AN: I apologize for not updating this in like, forever!!! Have no excuse other than I lost interest in the fic but I hope that with the ideas running through my head and all of YOUR help, it won’t happen again. :)
Important AN: I’m going to make Harry/Raymond’s birthday beginning of June for this fic. He will learn from Severus that his actual birthday is 31 July but as he has always celebrated it on the 3rd of June, he will continue to do so – also to fit in with his new persona.
Severus smiled as he thought of what the evening would deliver. Who would win the word game tonight? Even though he had won each previous game, it was getting harder to beat the boy and Severus dreaded the day that the brat would be the one to go to bed triumphant in the knowledge that he had outsmarted his professor. His Professor!
Maybe he should invest in a dictionary for himself?
Chapter 6: Begin the way you wish to go forth.
The first of September crept up on Raymond like a thief in the night and it was with quite a shock that he realized he would be meeting his schoolmates that evening.
The past eight weeks had been the most amazing, most tiring, most liberating and most frustrating of his life.
He had come to really enjoy his time with Professor Snape and was sad to realize that their one-on-one sessions would end now that the other students would also be there.
He had met most of the other Professors during the previous week as they came back from their vacations or family visits.
Professor Moody was downright intimidating and Raymond stayed away from the man as much as possible. Something about the Professor just didn’t sit well with him but Raymond had yet to raise the subject with Professor Snape.
His respect for Professor Snape and the work he did had grown exponentially over the last few weeks and Raymond could almost imagine the man a friend – if Raymond was inclined to have friends, which he was NOT!
It had been decided that he would stay in his quarters in the dungeons even after he was sorted into a house as he still had a lot of catching up to do and would be taking extra lessons in the evening from various Professors.
The headmaster – whom had not spoken to him more than twice in the eight weeks he’d been there – had arranged with some of the Professors to give him one-on-one tutoring in order to get him up to the standard the rest of his year mates were on.
Professor Snape and he had finished the second year syllabus just the day before and Raymond was both anxious and excited to find out what the third year work would hold.
Professor Snape had told him that the potions became a lot more time consuming and volatile in third year and by fourth year only those who really had an aptitude in the specific art would be able to do well. It was Professor Snape’s own way of filtering out the students who had the skill and ability necessary for potions making from those who were looking to score an easy grade. Which was something that had never happened in his class. Those who received a passing grade really deserved it.
Raymond was determined to be one of those and he worked hard to prove himself to the Professor.
Something else that he would sorely miss was their nightly chats. It had become routine for the two of them to sit and discuss their day over a cup of tea in Raymond’s room. The Professor took this opportunity to tell Raymond more about the school, the students and the other Professors as well as explaining to him in great detail the amount of ‘dunderheads’ that lived at the school.
Raymond had fallen out of his chair laughing when the Professor told him of a boy named Creevey who wet his pants when the Professor one day walked passed him in the hall way.
That was not something that generally would bring forth this kind of behavior from students so when Raymond asked Professor Snape why the boy had reacted that way, the Professor had replied that he had done nothing more than smile at the boy.
Raymond, who had gotten to know the Professor very well by then could not help but laugh at the picture. Yes, a smiling Snape was certainly something to be afraid of. The only reason that his Professor would smile was if he had really enjoyed marking an essay and the essay writer in question happened across his way.
Professor Snape had then passed Raymond a copy of the essay in question which was what caused him to fall off his chair and roll on the floor helplessly.
Yes, Snape would definitely smile while imagining Creevey’s face blanching when he realized his mistake. It was so much fun to toy with young people’s emotions!
Raymond thought back on that essay and couldn’t help but laugh again when he remembered what Snape had written.
Flashback
Raymond took the essay from his Professor with a wary look but once he scanned over the red markings that dominated the page he took a deep breath and read over them again, slowly this time.
No Mr Creevey, I am afraid that you are very much mistaken if you think that adding crushed Belladonna would make this calming draught stronger and longer lasting.
While it certainly makes the potion stronger and a LOT longer lasting, it also changes the properties of the potion completely, thus creating a whole new potion.
While I am sure that you love to indulge yourself in this activity, please keep it out of my classroom. I have no great wish to see twenty thirteen year olds discovering the precise effect of one of the strongest known aphrodisiacs in the world.
You’d have quite a time to keep young Miss Weasley off your person and while you might like that idea, I assure you that no one else shares your sentiments.
In future, be sure to write any essays when you are not… frustrated.
End Flashback
Oh yes, Raymond could see just how a young boy would react to that and could not fault his Professor for smiling at the young man in question.
Now Raymond just wished he had been there to see that smile as he still had not managed to erase that smirk from the man’s face without it turning into a snarl or blank look.
Maybe he should incorporate the word he had learned the previous night into one of his sentences and see what the man made of that…
*----------------------------------------------------------------------*
Raymond forced himself to stand still while he listened to the Headmaster welcome the students back and introducing the new first years.
It was a long wait as Raymond listened while the hat sorted each kid.
Professor Snape had told him that he would be introduced as a new student who had been home schooled. While the ‘relation’ between himself and the Professor would not be mentioned, some of the students might be able to make the connection and Raymond prepared himself for their questions.
Professor Snape had been made his legal guardian within his first week at the castle and though Raymond had at first been skeptic about it, he could not be more grateful now. Snape was the only adult he trusted with his safety. He had not come so far as to trust the man with his past just yet but he frightened himself by sometimes thinking of confiding in the man.
His past was his past and that is where it would stay. Or so he told himself everyday.
The Professor hadn’t mentioned the incident where he had blown the cauldron up again but Raymond could not forget about it or what the Professor had said that day.
He knew now that the man hadn’t meant to scare him or even yell at him – he realized that he had scared the Professor that day which was why the man had grabbed him and yelled at him.
His thoughts were brought back to the present when the Headmaster said his name and Raymond realized with a start that it was his turn.
The curious faces all turned to him as he made his way up to the stool with the hat on. He picked the old thing up and lowered it onto his head.
Even though he knew what to expect – courtesy of Professor Snape – the voice sounding through his head was still a shock to the system.
Ah, Mr McShane. Such a shame that you have to hide who you really are. Such a shame…
But, this is for the best, yes!
Now, let’s get back to business, eh? Hmmm, difficult. Yes, yes, I know that synonyms to that are ‘complicated’ and ‘tricky’, no need to try and drag me into this game of yours – you will lose, believe me.
Hmmm… You have a thirst for knowledge that would do any Ravenclaw proud. No? You don’t wish to be placed there? Oh, I see, like a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Hmmm, not a bad idea, not a bad idea at all.
Hufflepuff is definitely out of the question. You’d be bored stiff and would most likely lash out at those who wish to help. No, no, better not.
Gryffindor would be even worse. Not only is your brother in that house but the way your mind works is just way too complex for those in that house.
So Slytherin it is then, eh? Your guardian is Head of that House yes, yes. It’s a good choice, certainly the best choice for your particular ‘conduct’ – look that word up when you get a chance, I don’t have time to explain.
Ravenclaw would be my first choice but yes, I can see why you would wish to go elsewhere. One would not expect someone with as sharp a mind as yours to be in any house other than Ravenclaw.
While Slytherins and Ravenclaws are much alike, Slytherins are more ambitious and most of the time more vicious in their actions. They are not stupid, not in the least, but even though they have the drive and the thirst for knowledge that Ravenclaws have, they usually take a bit longer to achieve their goals.
So Slytherin it is then?
Yes, yes, no need to be tetchy! Severus is rubbing off on you – and no, that is NOT a compliment!
Fine, fine!
SLYTHERIN!!
The last word was shouted out loud and Raymond snatched the hat off his head before throwing it unceremoniously on the stool.
Turning around he caught Severus’s eye and the arched eyebrow but only snarled in response which elicited the other eyebrow as well.
Making his way over to the Slytherin table, Raymond seated himself in the first available seat – which just happened to be amongst the first years – and grabbed a plate where he then proceeded to fill it with a scrumptious meal.
The first years on either side of him moved their chairs away from him a bit before settling down. Raymond had no problem guessing that their behavior was due to the scowl on his face.
Why exactly the hat had wanted to draw the whole thing out for as long as it had was beyond him. He only knew that it had taken a lot longer than he had wished and was thus now in a very bad mood.
He hated drawing attention to himself!
*--------------------------------------------------------------------*
“Care to tell me just what exactly the hat had to say that put you in such a foul mood?”
Raymond blinked up at his Professor. He had not expected the man that evening. With school starting the next day he had assumed that their nightly visits would come to an end. Of course, the Professor knew his password and could enter at any time but Raymond had not thought that he would actually do so.
He was really not in the mood to explain everything to the Professor and so he settled on doing what he had decided to do earlier that day:
Attempt to shock the Professor’s smirk right off his face!
“No, I do not Professor. Now, if you would kindly take your execrable self and leave my quarters, I would be much obliged.”
Raymond made sure that he watched his Professor closely while he said this as he didn’t want to miss even the slightest change in expression.
He knew that the Professor would not take offence at what he said as the man knew that Raymond was determined to win one of their word games.
Frustration boiled up in him as the Professor merely blinked for an extended moment before turning his smirk into an even more menacing look and bowing sarcastically at him while backing towards the door.
Raymond knew he would tell his Professor what the hat had said eventually – maybe even that weekend – but for now, he just wanted to be left alone.
Once again, Raymond wished he had access to a camera but he knew that even if he had one, it would not work in the castle. This was one of the things he wanted to work on during the school year. Why should they not make use of the technologies that others provide them with?
He was pretty sure that the Professor did not know the meaning of the word ‘execrable’ and wished he was there when the man realized just exactly what it meant.
Tempted as he had been to shout at the man that “It means you are deplorable, miserable, woeful and wretched”, he still valued his life and though he knew that the Professor could take a lot – even insults to his face – he, Raymond, could never do that to the man. That he had called him execrable to his face was bad enough and Raymond knew he would apologize to the man when he saw him next.
*-----------------------------------------------------------------*
Severus paged through his newly acquired dictionary which already looked flayed at some pages until he found the word he was looking for.
Reading through the meanings, Severus was at first enraged by what he found but then found himself smirking – that the boy had said such a thing to his face was an accomplishment on its own. That the boy had said it while being rude already was testament to the tentative trust between the two.
Severus vowed to himself that he would not break that trust. Not even to spare his own dignity.
End Chapter 6
Review please!!