Tainted Soul

Rose turned and looked at Hermione she wasn’t staring at her she was
staring at Viktor and the look in her eyes said it all. She wanted more
then friends. “Hi Mione it’s been a long time.”
“Yeah it has Viktor.” She said to him.
Rose moved away from them and started to walk down the hall she
should have known that this was going to happen when Hermione saw
him. She should have known that she had liked him. But she won. She
got the guy this time and she wasn’t going to lose him without a fight
even if she might not want him. No she wanted him as her husband
she wanted him to love her and she loved him. She stopped walking
and turned. She saw that they were talking and she started to shake
there was no use they wanted each other and she knew that she would
be pushed aside. Just like she always is.
She turned and ran back to her room. There was no need and seeing
if he was coming he was talking to her so he wouldn’t want to come. When
she got to her room she walked in to find Lupin sitting and waiting for her.
He looked at her and she saw tears in his eyes. “What is wrong Lupin?”
“Rose I have to talk to you.” He said to her.
She sat down in front of him and placed her hands in his lap. “Then talk to me my friend.”
“I am scared for you Rose. I am scared that you will not follow your heart.” He said to her.
“What are you talking about?” She asked him.
“You must not settle for one because of the pain in your heart. You must
face that pain. You must face the one you really love. You have suffered
so much but you are not through suffering and that is by your own choice.
You won’t move on from this. You can live past all this and yet you choose
not to. How can you not see that if you want to be happy you must get through
this you have to go through this?” He said to her after he took her hands.
She had her head down and she tried to force the tears that wanted to fall back
in but they were falling. “You do not know what I know. You do not feel the things
that I feel. None of you know the pain I go through every moment of every day. My
pain is my own and no one is going to make me get through it any faster then I am.
You think I like being this way? You think I enjoy looking at someone and them
reminding me that I was tainted. I have no soul because of this and if I do have
a soul then it is tainted as well. None of you know the life that I have lived the past
three years. None of you.”
She pulled away from him and stood up. She walked to her chest and opened it.
Then she lifted out her small pensive and walked back to him. “No one has seen
these but me. No one will see them after you.”
She sat them down at a table and walked to the door. “Maybe after this you will
understand why I am still suffering.”
Lupin looked at the stone bowl and stood. Then he walked to the table and sat
down. He took his wand and dipped it into the mix. Then his head followed. He
fell into the first memory and landed right in her body. This is new for him. “You
don’t know him.”
“Miss Geller may I see you in my office for a few?” Snape asked her.
“Of course Professor.” She said and then followed him. He felt as she walked
behind him. He was walking like he was stiff but she didn’t think anything of it.
Last night he had hurt his leg and she thought that it still hurt. Lupin didn’t only
see her memories through her eyes but he also heard her thoughts. He felt what
she felt and that was new for him. When Snape grabbed her arm and pulled her
to him she knew that something was wrong. When she felt the pull at her naval
she knew then that he was betraying her. She didn’t cry though she wanted to.
She stared at him with all the hate she felt for him. She pulled away from him
but he grabbed her and threw her on the table behind her. She again tried to
move away from him but she was chained magically by unseen binds and he
ripped her clothes off her. He hit her and she felt pain but she didn’t cry or
scream she locked eyes with him and stared at him with such hate that he
felt sick to be inside her. She hated him with everything and he felt a little
of her die as he ripped into her. He cried out in pain but she didn’t she didn’t’
utter a sound. Though her head was screaming in pain she didn’t allow it to
show.
He spilled his seed in her and moved away from her. Then he was replaced by
Draco. Lupin watched in horror as he slapped her and smiled. “Finally where
you belong Geller on your back under me. Now you are going to be a good little
whore and take me for a ride.” He felt the hate double and he felt sick. As he
fucked her she locked eyes with the man that did this to her and made sure he
saw the hate in her eyes. She didn’t make a sound as her body was used over
and over again though her mind and soul were crying out in such pain that Lupin
felt like he was sick. She didn’t betray herself in showing this pain.
When she was dragged into the cell and threw on the floor she still didn’t cry. She
still didn’t allow any pain to show. She sat there and thought about the man tha
t did this to her and it helped her hold on. It helped her to plot his death. She
wanted them all to die and she was going to start with Snape. Lupin pulled
himself out of the memories and shook his head. He didn’t think he could
go through any more of them. But he did think that Dumbledore should see
this. He stood and picked the bowl up. “Where are you going with that?”
“I think that Dumbledore should see this. How did you make it through your
eyes?” He asked her.
“I didn’t it just happened that way.” She said to him.
“You aren’t taking that to Dumbledore.” She said to him.
“He should be the one to see this.” He said to her.
“Why he already wants to rid me of my memories. This will make him want to
do it even more.” She said to him.
“How did you know that?” He asked her.
“I heard Harry telling Ron and Hermione about it.” She said to him.
“Let him see how strong you really are.” Lupin said to her.
“I am not strong. I am stupid. And no I will not allow him to go through that. I
didn’t think it was like that with others. I thought it was only like that with me
because they were mine.” She said to him.
“Please Rose allow me to take him in there. I think he should see these.” Lupin said to her.
She looked at him and sighed. “Fine, show him but I want them back in a few hours.
If I don’t get them back I will go hunting for them and you won’t like me very much
if I have to hunt for them.”
Lupin nodded and walked to the door. She watched him as he walked out. When the
door closed she sank to the floor and started shaking. She didn’t know that he was
trying to get the others to agree to get rid of her memories she just thought he was
trying. Now that she knew she knew that she wasn’t safe here either. “I shouldn’t
have come back.”
She sat like that until she stopped shaking then she stood and walked to the door.
It was time to show them that she wasn’t going to allow them to make her choices
for her. She walked to the hall and looked in. It was supper time and everyone was
there. She wiped her face and cleaned herself off with her wand then she walked in
and straight to her seat. She sat down looked at the plate of food in front of her and
pushed it away. She wasn’t eating. She wasn’t drinking she was just going to sit there
until supper was over. “Rose, are you ok?”
“Who are you do I know?” She asked Harry.
He looked at her in horror and then up at the teachers table. He stood and walked
up to the table. “I told you no. I told you not to take her memories but you did it
any ways. Now she doesn’t know who I am. How could you do that? You lecture on
keeping your word and you don’t keep yours. What kind of wizard are you?”
“Harry I don’t know what you mean. I didn’t take anything from her. I swear I didn’t.”
He said to him.
“Then why doesn’t she know who I am?” Harry shouted at him.
“Because I choose not to know who you are. I don’t want to know any of you anymore.
Why should I want to know the ones that make my choices for me? You all talk about
my life and you don’t even ask my say on anything. I live it you don’t so stop trying to
run it all of you!” She shouted from behind him.
He turned to see she was standing and shaking. “I cannot believe that you any of you
would make choices in a life that isn’t yours to live. Let me live my life the way I see fit.
None of you would have been able to live it anyways.”
She turned and stormed out of the hall and outside. “Acciuo BROOM!”
Her broom flew from her window and into her hands. She put it between her legs and
pushed off the ground. As she flew into the sky all her thoughts disappeared. She felt
free for the first time in months. She flew around and around the grounds. She went
higher and higher into the sky. She dipped and rolled. Then she flew straight at the
ground and pulled up right before she hit it. Then she flew straight up into the sky.
She held on for her life but loved every minute of it. She didn’t have to think of feel
all she had to do was hold on. “ROSE!”
She ignored whoever was calling her name as she flew up and around in the sky.
She didn’t want to talk she didn’t want to think. She didn’t want to feel all she
wanted was to be left alone.

Review and I hope you like my story oh and the only things I own are Rose her Family
Seth and the Plot nothing more I swear.