Somewhere

a massivly huge chapter for you.
think of it as a belated christmas present.
it would have been up yesterday for christmas but i ate too much and fell asleep watching really bad TV!!
alot of the chapters in this story are long ones so it takes me longer to right them up.
hang in there though, it's worth it.
funny really i've just been listening to my music and just as i was finishing 'somewhere' and 'the bell' came on, the bell being narrated by Alan Rickman. *swoon faint die*

severus: whore
isis: why yes, yes i am. i can't help it if he and you are my weakness!!

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They had walked together in a companionable silence, just the two of them, the darkness and the sense that something monumental had just happened in that seemingly ordinary house on that ordinary street. Eventually they left Privet Drive and ducked into a deserted alley where they apparated away. Having no idea where they were bound for, a side-along apparition was necessary, one that Harry was somewhat apprehensive about. Putting his arm around the Severus’ waist he tried to stay as far away as possible until he was pulled tightly against that firm side. Shocked by how comfortable and right it felt, even after everything he’d been through, the actual apparition took him by surprise. So much so that when they landed at their destination he stumbled and fell heavily onto Severus. Looking up he found himself inches from coal black eyes, suddenly acutely aware of the heat source next to him.

After his disastrous relationship with Cho and a brief fling with Ginny, followed by a mutual decision to break up, he’d pretty much resigned himself to the single life. Or at least he had until that night. At the end of his fifth year he’d met John, the suave and friendly seventh year Ravenclaw. He’d bumped into him, quite literally, at the Yule Ball. After a little too much spiked punch and a stolen kiss from John, they’d stumbled back to the Gryffindor dorms and fallen into bed amid a fit of giggles. Nothing serious had happened that night but it did open Harry’s eyes. It seemed he did in fact very much swing the other way. He’d never had a serious boyfriend, although he had got back together with John a few times fro a fumble, but he’d never gone all the way, keeping perhaps the one thing in his life that he could control for that special person. Sure he liked John. He was a nice guy, always there with a kind word and a smile, but he never really felt comfortable with him, always on his guard, unable to let himself go completely. He realised it was because John was so young. Ok so he was two years older than Harry but it didn’t feel that way. He’d already done and seen so much in his life, been through so many things, that he felt old inside, like he’d missed his childhood and would never recover it. He needed someone he could relate to, someone who’d experienced some of the things he had, someone older. It was then that he’d begun to notice the men around him.

First it had been Sirius and Remus. After much searching, the trio and the Order had found a book in the extensive Black library stating that the veil was in fact not a one way death sentence, but more of a waiting room, somewhere the souls of those that passed through were held, before they were judged. They just had to hope that he was still waiting in line. With some careful planning and a bit of grey magic, they’d pulled him back through a little over seven months later. All things considered he was none the worse for ware, albeit a tad on the pale side, but other than that he said he didn’t remember anything since the last fight. He’d been giver a full pardon, as a month before hand Pettigrew had been found dead in a ditch, some nasty looking bite marks on his neck. It seemed that Voldermort had gotten tired of his accident prone, spineless helper after all. So not long after he was back, Harry had received ‘the talk’ from him and Remus, along with an invitation to their formal bonding the next month. After some consideration he’d outed himself to them and they’d hugged him with smiles on their faces, telling him they’d always be there for him. Not long after that he’d started to fantasize about being with them. At the time he’d felt ashamed, dirty. They were his godparents, his father’s best friends and they were married. Looking back now he realised he’d just latched onto them because they were the same as him, they loved men. So the infatuation hadn’t lasted long and not long after he met John he’d told Ron and Hermione. Again he’d been confronted with hugs and smiles and a complete feeling of acceptance. When he’d returned to Privet Drive for the holidays he’d met the new postman. Tall, lean and handsome he was in his late twenties. That soon ended though when Dudley caught him with one of the gay wizards magazines Ron had got him and Vernon had beaten him with a belt, because of another one of his ‘freakish’ qualities.

Through all the crushes and infatuations though there had been the mystery man of his dreams. Always he was swathed in shadows, so that Harry could only see the ebony locks and long, elegant fingers. There was always the smell as well, the one that was suddenly so very strong. Sandalwood, spice and potions and something else, vanilla perhaps? He thought that perhaps the mystery man was Snape and he’d certainly been thinking about him enough. What had started as another horny, schoolboy driven crush had developed into an infatuation and was now slowly changing into something else. If he’d have looked back, he’d have noticed that first shift into something different last year. Throughout his sixth year he’d received extra help and training from a lot of his tutors in different aspects of magic in the hopes of a quick defeat when it came to the final battle. Of all of his tutors though, he’d spent the most time with Snape. With the other mans help he’d learnt more spells than he knew what to do with, both light and dark, potions that would pickle the brain, literally, meditation and power focus techniques and muggle defence and hand-to-hand combat. It was the hope that this year they’d carry on with the weapons training they’d started and find his Animagus form and depending on time he’d start to learn more advanced wandless magic. It was that close training throughout the year that had led to the fragile friendship that had been struck up. He still wasn’t sure what it was that attracted him to the pale, stubborn, rude, sarcastic and moody man. Maybe it was exactly that. He’d always been that way. A constant in Harry’s life his temperament was unwavering and almost comforting. Or it might have been the dark sense of humour, the innate wittiness, or maybe it was the eyes that could almost see into your very soul and the voice that could stop someone in their tracks. Who knows, maybe it was all of those things and more.

Pushing himself upright he looked at the floor to hide his blush and mumbled an apology.

“Potter, you don’t have to apologize for everything. There are some things in this world that even you can’t control,” came a stern voice.

“Your right. I’m sorry Sir,” he mumbled again, still looking at the floor so that the hand that suddenly grasped his chin gently but firmly took him by surprise making him jump and let out a small involuntary yelp. Slowly the hand forced him to look up into Severus’ eyes.

“Harry stop it. You’re safe now. No one is going to force you to do anything, you’re safe and you need to stop apologizing for everything. Don’t look down, look straight ahead and face what comes. It’s not always pleasant, believe me I know, but you have to fight through it or it’ll destroy you Harry. Now if you’d like to follow me,” he said softly, his voice low, letting go of the boy’s chin and making him shiver.

Following behind the other man, he kept his eyes fixed on the black clad back. Merlin’s beard. Here he was weak at the knees already and there was still another week till his birthday and then the rest of the holidays. How was he going to cope! He was so lost in though, trying to think of ways to stop himself molesting his Professor, that he nearly bumped into the back of said Professor when he stopped suddenly. Peering round him he took a look at the cottage that stood in front of them. It was small and dingy, possibly painted white originally, although now a strange grey-brown colour, with mouldy thatch and dirty smeared windows. Lovely.

“Welcome to your new home,” Severus sneered, clearly not impressed with the current arrangements.

“Errr… thank you, I think,” he replied.

“I tried to find somewhere better, but with the recent influx in Death Eater activity the headmaster seemed to think that this would be more appropriate, so I am afraid that we will be here until term starts again. It will be just me and you,” he said walking towards the front door.

Harry followed him with a gulp. He was doomed.

“Ummm… what about my birthday Sir? I was supposed to be going to Ron’s for the rest of the holidays. He was throwing me a party.”

“I’m afraid that it will have to be cancelled. Only myself, you and the headmaster know of this location and that is the way it must stay. I’m sure the headmaster will bring your presents with him.”

“Oh… Ok, thank you Sir.”

They steeped through the front door of the cottage and Harry breathed in the heavy musty smell that comes from a building that hasn’t seen the light of day for a long, long time. As he stood there in the hallway he heard muttering behind him then felt a sudden flare of magic.

“I just set the wards. Now the only person that come in or out of the area is the headmaster. He should be coming by once a week with news and food supplies. The wards surround the cottage and the garden. Feel free to explore within the limits. We’re to continue your training while we’re here. There is supposed to be a fully stocked training room in the basement along with a small potions laboratory. There are two bedrooms, a bathroom and a study upstairs. The room next to the bathroom is yours, mine is opposite. You are not to enter there unless expressly told to. There is also and outdoor training range, a small garden and a pond. As I said feel free to explore. I’m afraid that the entire interior and exterior will need a clean before we can get settled though. Is everything clear?” he asked.

“Yes Sir.”

“We’re going to be here for a while so for the time being you may call me Severus.”

“Then you should call me Harry Si… I mean Severus,” he said with a grin. Although they’d spent the previous year training together they’d still always referred to each other as Mr Potter and Sir. Now it seemed their enforced confinement had changed things, hopefully for the better. Maybe there was hope for a real friendship after all.

“In that case Harry, do you feel up to cleaning this place up a bit?”

“Sure,” he said. The burn on his back was still just a dull throb, the painkillers doing their job well.

“Stop if you feel any weakness, pain or dizziness,” he said.

“I will do. Don’t worry though. I’ve cleaned with worse injuries and no pain relievers.”

“You can use magic here as well. It’s been masked from detection so the ministry won’t know. So any household cleaning spells you know I would suggest you use,” he said, worried about Harry’s joke about his pain and injuries. Pushing it to the back of his mind for the moment though he set off on a cleaning spree, thanking his mother silently for her wisdom.

With a few quick and simple spells he had the windows clean, paint fresh and new and the thatch repaired. Now it truly looked like a cottage and he headed back inside to finish the job. Going through the living room and kitchen he cleaned it of dust and cobwebs, shooing the spiders outside. Meanwhile Harry was upstairs giving the bathroom a final once over and checking the study one last time before going to his room. Spelling clean sheets onto the bed and cleaning the drapes of dust he cracked the window slightly and lay on the bed for a few minutes, enjoying the luxury of feather pillows and super soft sheets, soaking in the details around him. The bed itself was huge, dominating the room. On either side was a small table, a huge wardrobe stood near the door, a small desk opposite the window, along with a chest of drawers and under the big bay window was a little loveseat. The whole room was done in the same earthy tones, deep green walls and rich chocolaty carpets. The drapes around the bed were deep green and the sheets were crisp white cotton next to the dark brown coverlet. Casting a few little spells to get everything right he finished putting the last of his things away and headed back downstairs. It wasn’t just his room that was done in earthy colours. The whole cottage featured the same colour scheme, one of greens, browns and creams. Going into the living room he found Severus sat in one of the two slightly worn, brown leather armchairs while he sank onto the couch and got comfortable.

As he sat there he reflected on what had happened and what would happen next. Vernon was dead and his aunt and cousin were none the wiser and never would be, instead thinking that he’d walked out on them years before, Harry also leaving to live with friends. He never had to go back to that house of evil and bad memories. This was his last year at Hogwarts and when he was done he’d be setting off into the open world, if he was still alive. He wasn’t really sure what he was going to do when he left. He’d thought about being an Auror, but he’d seen enough death in his life already without then contributing to it later. Now he thought more about just travelling for a while, then perhaps settling down somewhere. He dreamed of one day finding a partner, a soul mate, making a home somewhere, maybe adopt children. It was the one thing he wanted at the end of all this. Peace, happiness, a family. He knew likelihood of getting that though was slim to nil. Even if he made it through this more and out the other side alive, most people only wanted him for his money or his fame. He wanted someone who saw Harry, not his scar or his name, someone who wanted him, not the idea and illusion of him.

As he turned over on the couch he winced and let out a little hiss of pain as the burn on his back pulled taught. Obviously the pain reliever was wearing off. He’d been given several nasty tasting potions before they left Privet Drive to stabilise and start to heal him. One he knew was a potion to combat malnutrition, the same one Madame Pomfrey gave him when he returned at the beginning of each year. Another he recognised as one that would heal minor injuries, one that would start healing broken bones, one would heal his internal injuries, one cleaned out infection and there were a few other he didn’t recognise. The burn however had been to large and to serious to treat all at once so for that he’d just had to grin and bear it with the help of a splendidly good pain reliever.

“Are you alright?” came a voice, just tinged with concern.

“It’s my back,” he replied.

“Roll over and lay on your stomach. I have a salve that will help it heal faster.”

Doing as he was told he heard the faint rustle of fabric followed by the sound of a lid being unscrewed and then the sudden strong scent of oranges. Cool hands lifted his overly large shirt and started to smooth a thick salve over the burn. At first it was cool and eased the pain from the burn itself, then slowly it warned up, seeping into the skin and easing his muscles, taught from pain and fear that he didn’t realise he was still feeling. The feeling of those cool, long fingered hands running over his back was so good that he had to bite back a moan of pleasure as they soothed and eased. All too soon though it was over and his shirt was gently put back into place, the cool hands moving away.

“Thank you,” he said rolling over onto his back, feeling nothing but the clamminess of the salve.

“You’re welcome. The salve will help speed up the healing process and should limit the scarring. It’ll clear up any infection as well and keep the pain at bay. With regular applications it should be healed almost fully by the end of the week.”

“Excellent.”

“Now if you don’t mind I’m going to turn in for the night. Dawn is in about an hour and contrary to common belief I am not nocturnal. I know you’ve slept already today but I suggest you try to rest some more. You’ve been through a lot and your mind and body need time to rest and recuperate. I’ll wake you when the headmaster arrives tomorrow.”

“Ok,” he said just before a huge yawn overwhelmed him. Getting up he headed towards the stairs then stopped and turned to look at the other man. “Thank you Severus, for everything. I’m in your dept and I truly don’t know how I could ever repay you,” he whispered before turning and leaving.

“You’ve already have. You’re alive Harry and that’s payment enough,” he sighed to the empty darkness around him.


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isis: enjoy people and r+r :D
severus: she's at it again
muse: she just can't help herself
isis: *mumbles something about whips and iron maidens*
muse & severus: meep!

to my lovely reviwers

Vyator -- don't worry i'm sure i'll see you at some time so that you can get 'ol red out again :D

never_tempt -- the new chapter is now... but you already know that because you'll just have read it.... never mind. sorry no foreplay, well not really. i may add some in later though.... i have about two months of time to fill in before they get together so plenty of time for evil goings on ;D

Jane -- o_O ..... you are strange..... i like you!! :D

Mie -- again the dream doesn't really have alot to do with the story, just makes harry realise who it is. there's still time though