Indago:3

Chapter Five

Two weeks of idyllic summer passed and things settled into a natural rhythm rather well. Harry and Severus became house chums again with the addition of Maia, who was learning quickly that her Sev was not a pushover and demanded her best behaviour. Being a smart little girl, she quickly complied and Harry was seen spending more and more time in Severus’ vicinity whenever Maia was home from her nursery school. It only took those two weeks for Draco to catch on and become a bit firmer with Maia as well.

But there was a distance between Harry and Draco, which Snape quickly picked up on.

“Do you and Draco have sex regularly?”

Harry stopped digging a hole in the soil and looked at Snape, who was still tagging a plant they had already put in the ground. The sun shone down on them warmly but not intensely.

“I… What?”

“I asked if you and Draco engaged in sexual intercourse on a regular basis,” Snape said in a calm voice. He finished his task and reached for another seedling. “I am confused as to your… indifference towards each other.”

“We’re not indifferent toward each other!” Harry sat back on his heels. “How could you think that?”

“You rarely touch each other. In fact, you touch me more than you do him. Which, you must admit, is odd. If you wish to begin something with me, then I would accept, of course. But I am concerned that you have decided to discard Draco as your primary Supero. You are legally married, you understand.”

“Yes, I do know that, thank you!” Harry snapped. He tossed his spade down. “I’m not…. Just stay out of it!”

“You will not speak to me like that, Harry.” Snape’s voice dropped to nearly ice. It made Harry immediately stop the agitated climb to his feet. He fell back down to his knees, his face in shock. “So, I was right. He’s been handling you with kid gloves. You haven’t felt this in years, have you?”

“Please… don’t. I can’t.” Harry shook his head as the pheromones kept him on his knees and passive.

“Can’t what?” Snape asked with a tone that seemed to cut right through Harry. “You can’t speak to me with civility and respect? You can’t answer the question?”

Harry shook his head again, his eyes pleading with Snape. “Don’t… Please… Please, sir, don’t put me here, please….” Harry got out through teeth that were clenched. The scent rising from Harry was a definite clue that he was terrified.

Snape pulled back and Harry was released from the dictates of the pheromones. But instead of lashing out and demanding that Snape leave, Harry scrambled to his feet and fled into the house without a word.

Letting him go, Snape continued planting the herbs the two of them had started, all the while contemplating how to fix this issue. Harry had called for him, which meant Harry was calling for help.



“What did you do?!”

Snape looked up from his book as Draco stormed into Snape’s room. The blond Supero was red in the face as he slammed the door and glared at Snape.

“I come home to find Harry has locked himself in our room and refusing to get out of bed and that you have been caring for Maia all day!” Draco hissed. “You are interfering, old man! I’ll toss you out of here on your bony arse if you don’t leave Harry alone!”

“Leave him alone? As you have been doing, Draco?” Snape asked snidely. “I see that ignoring a problem, at least at home, is still your favoured way of dealing with it. I am almost surprised you didn’t run to your father to fix things.”

Draco snarled and came at Snape. Ready for him, Snape easily swivelled out of his chair and used it as a symbolic barrier between the two of them.

“Stand down, Draco! Stop and think for just a moment! I can see that living with a Gryffindor has addled your wits, but please do collect them.”

“I have. Just now. I should never have agreed to you staying here!” Draco growled.

“Ah, and do you see?” Snape jumped in. “Not only did Harry look for outside help, but you indulged him without a raised eyebrow. You have been allowing far too much. Is it out of pity?”

“I do not pity him!”

“But your actions are contrary to your words. I believe Harry sees that and has interpreted your actions as pity and possibly as indications that you no longer care about him or what he does.”

“That is a lie! Harry knows how I feel and we do not need you interfering!” Draco shouted and kicked at the chair. It was not a true kick or he would have easily sent it sliding across the room. But the half-hearted action showed that Draco was not as angry as he appeared.

“I think you do,” Snape said calmly. “There is a large wall between you two that seems to get wider and thicker every week. It is the elephant in the room that no one will speak of.”

“But you will, won’t you?” Draco snapped. But he was listening.

“Yes, I will. I will because you are allowing things to slowly decay and become worse while at the same time you are harming the child. Do you think she is immune and oblivious to what is happening? She is more instinctual than any of us. She is reacting to the undercurrents you are refusing to acknowledge.”

Draco glared and then moved to flop down in the chair, his head falling back as his eyes closed. Snape only had a brief relief at his victory.

“I cannot fix what I do not know is wrong,” Draco bit out. He opened his eyes and glared at Snape.

“You know what is wrong, Draco. You just don’t want to face it.”

Draco grimaced. “Fine. He allows me to touch him. He allows me. I don’t think he actually enjoys it. I can make his body respond, but he is distant, as if it is happening to someone else. He changes between being involved with Maia to being distant and merely going through the steps. In fact, I would say his entire life is like that: he is merely putting on a show.”

“And you do not use the pheromones?” Snape asked as he watched Draco with a sharp eye.

Draco frowned again. “Of course not. How could I after what…” He sighed. “No. I don’t. I do not need to.”

“But he was accustomed to our scent before,” Snape pointed out quickly as he moved to his desk. “We purposely surrounded him in it in those first few weeks he awoke from his coma. He never balked and it allowed us to reconnect. Why has it become a taboo? Why does he fear it now?”

“How should I know?” Draco snapped, his hands fisting on the chair arms. “One day, I was walking past and he flinched. He flinched from me! I never want to see him do that around me again!”

Snape frowned, set his book down, and then turned back to Draco. “There could have been any reason as to why he flinched. I have been reading case studies regarding similar incidents to what happened to Harry. What you describe and what I have observed correlates and I believe he is purposely distancing himself from everything and everyone. He reacts badly to anything the books call ‘triggers’. These are words, smells, and visual cues, anything at all that will force Harry to remember the trauma of that time. He does not have control over these memories and they are nearly as powerful as reliving it all. The Muggles have also studied this phenomenon and, as Muggles are wont to do, have given it a ridiculously long name. But, they have possibly stumbled across an effective way of dealing with it.”

“You are telling me that Harry is forced to re-experience that nightmare all because of a word or scent?” Draco asked, his face showing how appalled he was at the idea. “Then, of course, we will not be allowing any pheromones in this house. We will go through and remove anything that can possibly remind him.”

“Don’t be ridiculous!” Snape snapped. “And what of the world outside this house? What of Maia? Will you remove her as well? Her very presence is a reminder! The more he and you try to hide from it, the greater importance and impact you give it! It has been years. It is time you both moved past it and carry on!”

“We are!”

“You are pretending and he is stuck. Anything can be a trigger for him: a person, a place, or an object. He needs to remove the stigma and allow it to be a faded memory. A traumatic one, yes, but one that will no longer attack him.”

Draco was staring hard at nothing before his eyes snapped up, cold with anger. “That bastard! That bastard supervisor at the institute! I knew Harry had called him ‘Muroch’! He must be one of these things, a person that is making Harry remember!”

Snape took a deep breath and nodded. “Perhaps. It could only be a similar hair colour, or perhaps a similar speech pattern. It could be anything. This is what I am trying to explain, you idiot. We cannot remove everything and everyone from existence that could trigger Harry’s emotional response to that time. We must remove the emotional response.”

Draco glared at the epithet used on him, then sighed in resignation. He straightened in the chair. “Very well. I have obviously been deluded by my own emotions. What do we need to do?” he asked calmly, the cloak of responsibility and duty almost visibly being placed upon his shoulders. Before Snape’s eyes, Draco became the man and leader he had learned to be and no longer the frightened boy he had been. It always amazed Snape when he saw the change, but he would be cursed if he’d ever admit to it.

Snape set down his notes and crossed his arms. “We need to make these things and people lose their power over Harry. He needs to be desensitized to it. It will mean that he must face what he has been hiding from.”

“I will admit to avoiding issues, but if you accuse Harry of hiding from anything, prepare to duck,” Draco said with a chuckle.

Snape glowered. “He will need to face it all, even his own fearful tactics.” He looked deep into Draco’s eyes. “This will not be easy. We will need to go against everything our instincts tell us,” he stated darkly.

Draco nodded and stood. “I understand.”




They began that night. Both Superos forced their way into the bedroom and allowed their scent to filter through the air. Not enough to completely control Harry, but enough to demonstrate who and what they were. As Snape had predicted prior to their entrance, Harry reacted badly to the invasion and immediately began to shout at them to leave him alone. He threw things and tried to force his way out of the room. When he was not allowed escape, a disconcerting change came over him immediately: his eyes became wide and his entire body radiated terror. Draco wanted to call the entire thing to a halt and nearly buckled, but a sharp glance from Snape kept him together. If Harry had been enduring the terror and torment of those weeks with Muroch and the werewolves over and over for months and years, then Draco could do the same this night. Snape began ordering Harry to do simple things, like taking off his shirt and folding it. Harry was then asked nicely to let Draco embrace him. Harry complied with everything but was in a near frenzied state the entire time. When he used the title of “Master” while pleading, Draco felt sick and wanted to make everything stop. But once again, Snape forced him to continue and indicated that Draco begin making commands. With an angry look at Snape, Draco did so.

“Sit on the bed, Harry.”

Walking slowly towards the bed, Harry nearly whimpered as he sat down on it. “Please, Draco. D-Don’t do this. I… I can’t… Please!”

“I only want to sit with you,” Draco replied calmly as he moved forward. He was stopped in his tracks when Harry hopped up and grabbed the book that had been sitting on the nightstand.

“Get away from me!” Harry yelled while holding the book up threateningly. “You’re not touching me, you nasty piece of shite! Get the fuck away from me!”

“Don’t hold back your anger,” Snape murmured from behind Draco, his arms folded over his chest. “Be calm, but be angry.”

“Shut the fuck up!” Harry shouted. “You haven’t got a fucking clue what we should or shouldn’t do! You tired old codger! Get the hell out of my house!”

“This is our house, Harry and you will not speak like that to a member of this household. Severus is part of this household and you can’t act that way to him,” Draco stated firmly.

“I can act whatever way I want!” screamed Harry. “Don’t treat me like a child, you pompous bastard! Right, you want me out of the house? Then I’ll go!” Harry started to move around the two other men toward the door, but Snape and Draco moved to block him once again. The book was lobbed at Snape, but was easily deflected and fell harmlessly to the floor.

“Why are you doing this?” Harry cried. His face had melted from anger to fear again. “Why? I’m sorry for coming in here for a lie-down. I’m sorry for that, but please stop this! Please!” His chest heaved with his emotions as he reached a hand out to Draco. “Draco, please…don’t do this! Send Snape away and everything will calm down. Please, I promise. He always brings trouble and strife! Just get him away and everything will be okay! Please, Draco!”

Draco looked at his husband, really looked, and all the pretences he had built up around them fell away.

“No, Harry. I’m not allowing you to manipulate me into letting you hide anymore,” he answered steadily. His shoulders straightened from their hunched position and his face became calm, no longer showing his distaste for what was happening. “I told you to sit on the bed. Now do it.”

“I’m not hiding!” Harry shouted, his face flushed in anger. His arm dropped and he stalked further away from the bed. “How dare you accuse me of that, you prat! You are the one who runs and hides and says that sneak attacks and veiled strikes are better than bold and plain ones! But you have always been a fucking coward, haven’t you, Malfoy? Always a fucking coward who blames everyone else for his shortcomings! Just like this! You’re trying to get me to leave so you don’t have to be man enough to just tell me you want out, aren’t you? Fine, I’m leaving!”

“Get on the damn bed, Potter! Now!” Draco shouted suddenly. “Do it or I make you!”

“No, don’t!” Harry pleaded. He had fallen to his knees the moment Draco had raised his voice, his hands covering his head. “Please, don’t. I’m sorry, I’m sorry!”

Draco gritted his teeth and his fists clenched as Harry crawled toward the bed. Snape’s hand against his back reminded him of his duty and he followed Harry across the room. When they reached the bed, Draco quickly reached down and helped Harry up, his hands gentle. They sat together, Harry hunched down so badly his shoulders nearly touched his knees.

“Harry,” Draco began in a calm and quiet voice. “You were hurt. You were humiliated and hurt and nearly destroyed. I was so relieved to have you back and home and safe that I happily ignored signs that you were not whole. I relied on your hero status, your indomitable luck. I was wrong. We were both wrong and it needs to end now.”

There was no response from Harry and Draco looked at Snape. Snape merely raised an eyebrow and nodded at him to continue. Wanting to punch that supercilious face, Draco carried on.

“Muroch is dead, love. You killed him. You ended it. He can’t hurt you anymore. All of them are destroyed and can’t—“

“Get the fuck away from me!” Harry exploded off the bed and ran toward the door. Snape was quick and rushed to stop him, grabbing Harry’s arm just as he reached for the door handle. “Get off of me! Don’t touch me! Get off me, you bastard! You sick bastard!” Harry screamed and fought in a crazed anger.

“Are you yelling at me or a dead man?” Snape asked in a voice strained with his exertions from holding Harry. They fought and Draco went to help get Harry back to the bed.

“Stop it! No, don’t!” Harry’s face paled in his terror as he was held down by both Superos. “Please, I’m sorry. Don’t do this,” he whispered.

“Love, we aren’t doing anything,” Draco replied soothingly. “You have to see that we will not hurt you. You are ours…truly ours…because we want to keep you safe and protected. We are not going to use you like that bastard did, do you understand? You have to let all of that go. It’s killing you, love. It nearly did once… don’t let it finish you off.”

The way in which Draco said those words had Snape looking curiously at him. “What do you mean?” he asked sharply.

“No! No, don’t! Don’t show him! He’ll be angry!” Harry shouted and began to struggle again. Draco and Snape held him, each using a leg to anchor one of Harry’s legs to the bed.

Draco took a deep breath and rolled Harry’s left arm toward Snape. With a whispered word, Draco removed the small bit of glamour and revealed the faded scar line that traced the vein halfway up Harry’s arm. “He said it was an accident. But it was Maia that told me that Daddy was bleeding.” Draco looked up at Snape with haunted eyes. “I wanted to believe him. I just wanted to believe him…” He cleared his throat and looked back down. “There have been no other incidents since,” he added calmly.

A cold stone seemed to have settled inside Snape’s stomach as he stared at the scar. He had had no idea how close they had come to…

“This is more serious than I had assumed,” he said to Draco. “We will not be able to accomplish this on our own, as loath I am to say it. We will need to contact a professional.”

“No! Get off me! You’re not sending me to a loony bin! Get off me!”

Draco nodded as he struggled to hold Harry down. “I’ll see to it immediately.”

They were up all night, ordering Harry to sleep and then when he woke from a nightmare, they sat with him and calmed him, ordering him to tell them what it was about.

At dawn, they put in him in the tub, commanding him to get naked in front of them. Severus and Draco bathed Harry while he cried. They soothed him with words and their presence and after the water had been warmed three times, they dried him off and all three of them fell into the bed, exhausted.

It was only the beginning, but they would get through it. They were a pack and they would help to heal each other.