Twilight Gardens

The rest of the summer was spent in similar fashion. The Old Man was seen once and only briefly. Lucius' mother was nearly invisible as well, showing herself occasionally on the terrace when the morning was particularly breath-taking. She would sit on one of the white, wicker chairs with a cup of tea steaming before her. She addressed her son with formality and sterility and she seemed to prefer to not acknowledge him at all.

At night, Lucius and Severus made use of the Neo-Roman bath in the backyard of the estate. The water had been charmed to perpetually remain at a desirable temperature. The bath was surrounded by a pulchritude of flora. On a starry night, the boys were sitting in the water nude when Lucius encircled Severus with his arms and said, "What makes you feel hallow?"

Severus blinked, "Huh?"

"At the beginning of the year when I told you I felt hollow you said you understood what I meant," explained Lucius. "What makes you understand?"

Lucius was speaking gently and sincerely. Clearly, this wasn't meant as a venomous interrogation. Still, Severus flinched before he answered, "I'm not sure. I've felt this way for so long, it's hard to say what started it."

"Well," Lucius said thoughtfully, "if you could get rid of the thing that makes you hollow, what would that thing be?"

Giving the abstract question some serious consideration, Severus replied slowly, "I don't even know that it is a thing. I think it's more about the way I look at things. I look at the others at school and I think that they will never be anything more than what they are. The Hufflepuffs will always be Hufflepuffs, the Ravenclaws will always be Ravenclaws, the Gryffindors will always be Gryffindors."

Lucius raised his eyebrows, "Of course they will. We will always be Slytherins. It's what we are. It's what we are destined to be. What's wrong with that?"

"It seems too simplified," Severus said, gaining more confidence in his words. "How is it that people are so easy to define? How can there be only four types of witches and wizards? More importantly, how can a witch or wizard's category be determined at such a young age? Isn't it possible that one can change after age eleven? Does one's inner evolution not continue long past that stage?

"But no. No, it doesn't continue after the Sorting Ceremony because once you have that label put on you, that's it -- it's on you forever. You can never escape your House affiliation and you must always be conscious of your duty to live up to your House's stereotypes because if you don't, you will never be accepted."

For a moment or two, Lucius didn't know what to say. He had never heard of such things in his life. He scowled, "Are you saying you want to switch Houses?"

"No," Severus said sharply. "I'm saying I could do without a House altogether."

"How can you say that?" Lucius cried in disbelief. "Without a House, there would be no sense of belonging, no identity!"

"There would be no identity but there would be individuality," said Severus. "We could be seen as unique people rather than Slytherins. Doesn't it seem odd that we can be defined by one word? Are we not more complex than that?'

"I'm proud to call myself a Slytherin," Lucius declared. "It is my title and my notoriety."

"We are all doomed," muttered Severus. "Each and every one of us have not the smallest chance. I don't know how I have come to this conclusion but I know that every child sorted into Slytherin from our year onward will die for their green and silver. It won't be their fault, what they do, because that's just how they were Sorted. But no one will see that. No one will weep for these doomed children.

"I wear the green and silver and I wear them with pride. That pride is only because I wear the same colours as you do. Whatever you shall suffer, I shall suffer. Whenever you shall die, I shall die."

"I don't entirely understand all that you are saying," Lucius admitted. "But that last bit is easily translated. Why will you do that for me?"

"I love you," Severus said without any hesitation.

Lucius' icy eyes seemed to melt into glistening tears for a second but they disappeared as suddenly as they had arrived. The truth was that he couldn't remember anyone ever uttering those words to him an was was unsure as to how he should respond. If his memory served him, neither of his parents had ever said that to him. In desperation, he simply spoke honestly, "I love you too."

Severus smiled and kissed him on the cheek.