Silk Stalkings

DISCLAIMER: Nothing is mine except the cheesy excuse for a plot, including the fun, smutty, make-up bedecked men and women and stupid sex puns.

A/N - Yes, it\'s true ... this story IS back after a hiatus since August. I\'d apologize due to my extraordinarily busy schedule, but honestly Real Life (as omninous as it is) comes first so ... Anyway, bless you all for being patient. Hope you like this really character-(as opposed to plot-) driven chapter.

Enjoy
~~ ** Lady Tuesday ** ~~

Chapter Five – Airing Out the Birthday Suit

Hermione found herself outside of the club and having no idea how she had gotten there. Her path through the legions of leather- and vinyl-bedecked Muggles – she dully noticed that there wasn’t a single natural, unprocessed fabric in the place – had gone from her consciousness without a trace. She was standing outside the club shivering despite the muggy summer evening pressing at her. She could still feel him against her; she had nearly surrendered to that pounding throb of recklessness colliding with her good sense. In the sultry fog rolling in from the river, Hermione Granger wrapped her arms around herself and rubbed as if she had frostbite.

Her heart leapt into her throat when she heard his voice behind her.

“Quite finished with this foolishness, are we?” he said mildly, but she could hear the self-satisfaction in his voice.

She nodded mutely. Severus flung her jacket over her shoulders and held her handbag out to her. Hermione accepted it without looking at him, nodded her head in thanks and then started off for home.

Severus smirked as he followed her easily. She was heading in the wrong direction for the Underground … that she had insisted upon, flatly refusing to allow them to Apparate.

“Decided against the more gratifying mode of travel?” he asked innocently.

“Do you want to ride the Underground?” she snapped, drawing her wand discreetly. The truth was, she knew she should take him on the train, but she just couldn’t stand being around him for an extra half hour while they rode home.

“Certainly not,” he returned.

Hermione glanced around quickly. There was only a couple of Muggles in the darkness of the alley nearby and they were too … occupied with each other, she decided, to notice their departure. Without even so much as glancing at Severus, Hermione Apparated back into their flat.


*****

She could hear his muted chuckle as she practically raced back to her room the instant they returned to the flat. She didn’t care. She couldn’t stomach him right now. Hermione spent the better part of two hours pacing around her bedroom, looking for some occupation that would take her mind off of the evening and those horrible minutes spent on the dance floor.

She meandered into the sitting room when she was certain she heard no obvious movement from his bedroom. She flicked on the telly and tried to settle in the big recliner she’d brought in from her old apartment. And even though one of her favorite films was on the American movie classics channel, she couldn’t sit still long enough to watch more than a few minutes.

With a groan, she went back to her bedroom and commenced rearranging, cleaning, and sorting all the possessions that she had left unpacked from earlier in the day. And although the hour she spent scouring the room tired her out, she still didn’t feel she could rest. What she needed was a big mug of tea, a thick blanket and a good book.

“On second thought,” Hermione said aloud as she stripped off her boots, “maybe what I need first is a good, hot shower. Steam the thoughts out of my head … that’ll do it.”

Bucked up by the thought of a good long soak, Hermione quickly stripped off her clothes, swaddled herself in her dressing gown and strolled towards the bathroom.


*****


Severus couldn’t help the smirk on his face as he wandered around his room without a specific purpose. He had definitely taken the self-absorbed little chit down a peg or two. Ha! Thinking that he couldn’t dance. He was a pureblood, damn it! They were taught those sorts of skills at their mother’s knees. And really that ridiculousness was more like upright intercourse than dancing anyway. And for that, he was certainly more than capable.

“Well,” he admitted to himself aloud now that Hermione was no longer around, “it has been a while since … oh, there’s no use dwelling on that …”

But now that Severus allowed himself to think about sex, he found that he began mulling over the events on the dance floor. He took a moment of self-indulgence to stand in front of the mirror she had left leaning against his wardrobe. He scanned his appearance, still pleased that the clothes she had chosen hugged his features so well. Severus kicked off his boots and toed off the tall black socks to stand in front of the mirror.

He remembered, quite clearly all of a sudden, her reaction to him on the dance floor. His hand went unconsciously to the smeared lipstick that now trailed across his chin. And he was sure that the rest of the smear was strung across her neck and breast. Was he really attractive enough to garner this reaction?

Against his better judgment, Severus allowed himself the moment to contemplate her reaction. And as he felt his blood warm, he felt the need to look closer. He quickly grabbed the hem of the flimsy mesh shirt and heaved it over his head. Now bare to the waist, Severus scanned his reflection again. Despite a few long scars across his chest, he was certain that this part of him was reasonably attractive. He may not be thickly muscular, but he was well defined and broad through the shoulders.

He tugged the tie from behind his head and let the wealth of ebony strands fall down to his shoulder blades. It gleamed in the low light, no doubt by some charm she had applied. His hair was so thin that when he spent days at a time over bubbling potion chemicals of various make-ups, he could never seem to fight the grease. And yet, with a flick of her wand, she had made it gleam.

Without warning, he remembered the glitter of gold in her hair and at her breast. And when Severus noticed in the mirror that his lower body was straining against the tight leather at the memory, he growled in his throat and strode out of the room.

He had better go stick his head under the cold water faucet and get that junk off his face. And perhaps cool off a bit.


*****


Hermione sighed as she leaned back against the cool tile of the shower. The steamy water pounding against her chest was working out the kinks in all the tiny little muscles that had seized up with tension over the last few hours. Eventually, she convinced herself to stand up and do something productive before she ran out the time-controlled warming charm on the water.

With a rueful smile, she decided her legs could use a good shaving. While she was at Hogwarts, she usually shaved every day or two. Not for her own personal satisfaction, really, but more because she was forced to be in various states of undress around five very silly and critical other girls on a daily basis. Since moving out on her own, however, she had decided it was sort of a ridiculous practice and only bothered with it when she felt it was strictly necessary. Which, over the past five years, had not been often.

She’d had so few dates in the last few years that she was beginning to feel it was a waste of her time to even try to get along with the fellows she worked with. Harry had been missing for as long as they’d been out of school, so she couldn’t go out with him to try to meet someone, and Ron had taken up with that dolt of a girl, Parvati Patil, just after graduation, so she’d resigned herself to dinners with Ginny and Dean. And even they were getting so sickeningly cutesy that she was afraid she might vomit at their next meeting.

Work was just as bad. Despite the exciting year or two after Voldemort’s downfall when they had been rounding up former Death Eaters and Dark supporters, the position of Auror wasn’t nearly so glamorous anymore. In fact, it had gotten so safe to be one that Tonks saw fit to give her daily updates on her impending pregnancy that had not been possible in years past because of the threats they received. Hermione couldn’t help but smile at this though, remembering Neville’s absolutely blissful face when he had told her of their expected bundle of joy. And the forty-seven minutes she had spent repairing her office supplies when Neville had swung Tonks around out of excitement and destroyed most of Hermione’s possessions.

Smiling gently again, Hermione picked up her razor. Perhaps this little endeavor living with a man (even if it was Snape) would encourage her to keep up with these things a little better. With a hearty laugh, she realized she’d probably have to teach Severus to do this very act. That was a pretty mental picture.

Hermione started laughing so loudly she had to stop her razor, sit down on the edge of the tub and hug her sides.


*****

When Severus strode purposefully to the bathroom of their flat, he was surprised to hear water running and Hermione’s loud, throaty laughter. With a raised eyebrow, he tried the door handle and found it open. Soundlessly, he moved inside. His conscience niggled at him for a moment but he resolved quickly that if she would be so foolish as to leave the door unlocked while she was showering then she had no claim with which to guard her privacy.

He quickly flicked on the cold-water faucet and lifted a washcloth to begin to remove the makeup from his face. After several unsuccessful tries, Severus realized with a grumble that she must have used some sort of spell to keep the make-up from smearing … and as such, keep it from being removed without the proper counter-spell. With a smirk, he realized she must not have done a terribly good job, as his lipstick had smeared. However, after several minutes past in frustrated silence and Severus muttered – in his head, so as not to make his presence known – every cleansing spell he knew before he found the right one, he grimaced, wondering why she would have chosen to charm everything but his lipstick.

After a heavy sigh and a glance into the mirror, Severus decided that if he were to start acting as if he were a woman, he should increase his chances of looking like one. He fished momentarily in a bag beneath the sink and quickly unearthed his shaving kit. He didn’t admit to many people that he still used the slightly strange contraption; most wizards simply cast a hair removal spell and were done with it. But there was something satisfying about the slide of the blade over his face that pleased Severus, so he continued with the practice as secretly as possible. He supposed eventually, he’d get as Muggle-happy as Albus if he didn’t watch it.

Severus continued stroke after stroke with the sharp blade edge, pleased with the precision he insisted on in his appearance. After a few moments, however, he found himself increasingly distracted by the piece-meal humming and various strange noises coming from behind the curtain to his left. With a huff, Severus put down his razor, washed his face and turned towards the large claw-foot tub.

With a silky smirk, he watched Hermione’s silhouette on the flimsy shower curtain. As starkly as if she had planned the lighting to cast a shadow, her outline stood out on the curtain, delicately bending with one foot on the rim of the tub as she drew a razor up her legs. Without a clear reason why, Severus took a step forward. Her foot poked out of the curtain at the back and could see her toes, painted a bright emerald green, hanging over the lipped edge and steadily dripping water onto the tile floor beneath.

With a light “oof!” and a loud squeaking noise, he watched as Hermione slipped on the slick surface and grabbed onto the curtain for support. Severus dashed forward by instinct, but stopped short, as she had regained her balance just before he could have moved towards her. He could hear a short, throaty laugh before she turned half away from him and resumed shaving the other leg.

A smirk stole over Severus’s features. For no particular reason other than his own amusement, Severus decided to teach her a lesson about stealth. Why, the girl had left herself completely vulnerable. Her wand was nowhere to be seen – no doubt left carelessly on her bed, or some other useless place – she had left the door standing open, and she wasn’t even careful enough to notice another person standing not three feet from her naked, helpless form. She had it coming to her, after that dreadful evening.

With her form half turned away from Severus and his carefully honed surreptitious movement, Severus eased the curtain open without her being aware, anxious of the look on her face when she noticed his presence. But Severus found himself frozen. He couldn’t decide exactly what had compelled him to stand and watch her.

He could feel his jaw go slack as he gazed at her, bent over slightly, her rear end in the air towards him as she ran the blade over her skin. He watched her stand slowly as she dragged it up her thigh. The water pounded against the sides her nicely rounded breasts, which he mentally appraised and deemed to be a tad small, but decently acceptable, though perhaps a tad too … pert. He smirked in spite of himself.

She bent again to drag the blade up her leg one last time and Severus noted large red splotches on her behind, no doubt where she had let the hot water pelt her skin for too long a time before switching positions. He shook his head, trying to cure him of this impromptu and highly inappropriate stare, but he still found himself transfixed. Right down to the strange way she flicked her wrist to clear the razor of the foam that had graced her leg before being stripped away. His heart stopped as she stood and turned towards him, certain that she would give him a good hearty slap once she figured he’d been staring.

With a tiny sigh of relief, Severus watched as she closed her eyes and doused her head under the streaming spray, a large portion of which splashed out onto his chest, which he remembered, with sudden shock, was completely bare. With a note of complete detachment, he flicked a few errant droplets from his leather pants, smiling oddly at the pool of warm water now running down the tub and over his bare toes. When he looked up again, Hermione had just started to turn back towards him, lift a hand to place it on the wall. She drew up her razor toward her underarm, garnering a quirked look of questioning that Severus wasn’t aware was on his face. And then it all happened so quickly he barely had time to react.

Before he realized what was going on, she had fallen to the base of the tub. When she had opened her eyes, Hermione had let out a shriek that had sought the base of his spine and shook it thoroughly. He clenched up, muttering something about a banshee – he wasn’t quite sure what – and then was jolted back to reality when he heard her loud, “Ouch! Damn it!”

When he opened her eyes, she was huddled against the bottom of the tub, trying desperately to cover as much of her body as possible. She was muttering what must have been every swear word she knew, and he couldn’t help but smirk at her. But then he noticed the blood.

“Ow,” she babbled, mixed in with heated swearing, “damn it, that really hurt …”

Hermione raised her right arm, apparently to gauge whatever wound she had given herself, but clamped it down again just as quickly and looked up at him with a stare that, had he not been who he was, would have made his blood run cold in fear. He smirked again. She had indeed learned well after six years in his classroom.

“Damn you, get the hell out of here! What the fuck did you think you were doing, you bloody bastard?” she hollered but then winced in pain.

He leaned down to touch her and she slapped at his hand. “Oh for Pete’s sake, let me help you up so I can look at the cut,” he growled back.

“Absolutely not!” she said. “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m n--- I haven’t any clothes on!”

“Yes, actually, I had noticed.”

Once again, she started muttering a string of curses, but Severus noticed a thin thread of tears starting to leak from one eye.

“Good grief, Granger, let me help you! You’re going to need even further medical attention if you don’t see to that soon. You’re losing a rather obnoxious amount of blood, and while I couldn’t care less if you passed out from blood loss, it would make a rather awkward story to explain to Albus on Monday morning.”

“Get away from me,” she snapped, but she started to sniffle as she noticed the amount of blood snaking over her fingers.

With a growl of frustration, Severus bent down swiftly and heaved his arms around her. Emitting not even a grunt of effort, he lifted her bodily from the tub and deposited her on the sink, on top of the crisp white towel he had procured to dry his face after shaving. Severus reached out to pry her hand away from her breast and was rewarded with another slap on the hands. Lightning quick reflexes born of years being in the service of untrustworthy people allowed Severus to roll over her hand and trap both wrists in his grip quickly.

“This is no time for trivial modesty, Miss Granger, you are hurt. Stop that damn struggling, you’re only making it worse,” he snapped as she wiggled in an attempt to cover her breasts and groin. “Now, promise me you’ll sit here like a good girl and wait for me to come back with my wand.”

“Bugger off, you bloody great bully,” Hermione snapped. “I’m not bloody five.”

“True, but you are bloody, so sit there while I get my wand.”

Hermione sighed loudly and grumbled as he turned and left, but the moment he exited the bathroom, she did sit more comfortably on the counter. She knew that she had to get the cut healed soon and with the amount of pain she was experiencing, she didn’t fool herself into thinking that she could perform a spell very well.

“Silly, really,” she said to herself. “It isn’t as if the cut is very big. It’s just bleeding a lot.”

She slowly removed her clenched hand from her breast, trying to find the cut. She gasped inadvertently at the amount of blood that stained her palm. She quickly grabbed up a washcloth, trying to blot away the blood to find the source of the cut. Now how was she supposed to let him heal her without … exposing herself any more than she already had? The issue became a moot point, however, because he returned with his wand long before she had figured any definite plan on how to remain somewhat modest.

Though she had released her grip on her breast as his absence, Hermione instantly returned the clutch upon his return. Severus smirked but then sighed as he was reduced to forcibly pulling at her fingers.

“Do not make me perform a body bind on you, Miss Granger,” he said angrily while struggling. “I guarantee you the effort it would require would result in my taking great amusement from your embarrassment once I secure the hex.”

Hermione scowled, but shuddered at the idea of what he would do to humiliate her should she give him the reason. So she dropped her hand from her breast, but dropped the washcloth she had used to dab at the cut across her lap, shielding as much of her naked body as possible. Severus was staring at her breasts so intently, squinting his eyes to try and discern the site of the cut from underneath the flow of blood, that she felt the need to raise her hands to her breasts to shield her body from the intensity of his gaze.

Wordlessly, he removed her hands, but then scowled and sighed. After a moment of slight searching around her, Severus grumbled.

“I’m going to have to clean the area before mending it,” Severus said. His eyes fixed upon the washcloth draped over her groin and he reached for it. She gasped instinctively and slapped at his hands.

Severus raised one eyebrow and said, “Would you prefer I used my hands?”

Hermione scowled, but was certain this was not a favorable option. Or, more rightly, it might actually be a favorable option … and that unsettled her greatly. Sensing no more resistance, Severus removed the washcloth from her lap but made no move to indicate that he even noticed her exposed state. He ran the cloth under the warm water faucet and dabbed gently at the blood now oozing gently across her breast. Hermione fought the urge to twitch and squirm away from him. When he had cleaned the area as much as it seemed possible, he mumbled a few charms in rapid succession.

“Finite haurire … medicare,” he whispered, pressing the tip of his wand against her skin.

Hermione felt a warm as he cast the charms and watched as the blood flow ceased and then the wound sealed itself instantly. He dabbed once again at her nipple and the delicate skin around it. She watched breathlessly as he took great care in cleaning her skin. When he seemed reasonably satisfied that she was healed, he wrung the washcloth under the faucet, hung it to dry and then straightened up to look at her. With an eyebrow raised and a not entirely unfriendly grin on his face, he patted her arm.

“I believe the phrase is ‘good as new,’” he said lightly.

She smiled slightly, but as she was still unsettled by the whole incident, she could not speak.

Severus’s face melted into a familiar smirk. “Would you like me to kiss it to make it all better?”

Hermione opened her mouth, fully expecting an angry tirade to roll out. And was thoroughly shocked when all she could do was gape and gawk like a landed codfish. She was certain that all the breath left her body completely when he lowered his head and laid his lips to the top of her breast. Too stunned to move, Hermione felt her body twitch as his tongue shot out to graze her nipple.

Her mind was screaming that she should so something – yell, leap off the counter and run … something – but found she could do nothing out of pure shock at the idea that her old Potions Professor, old enough to be her father, had just licked her nipple. He was raising his head again, clearly pleased that he had achieved such delightful shock, when he raised a hand and threaded it delicately between her legs, now spread slightly in her inattention and surprise. When his fingertips grazed her upper inner thigh, she found she could do something after all: her hand flew up, cracking sharply against his cheek before she leapt off the counter and fled back to her room. Severus straightened up, rubbed absently at his cheek, and chuckled before wandering back to his own bedchamber.