A Blue Stocking Thing

Anti-litigation charm: JK Rowling owns the Harry Potter Universe to her we bow. Warner Brothers and Various Publishers also have their own rights. We are just playing in their backyard and we promise to clean up when we have finished.

This is in response to the REGENCY CHALLENGE on WIKTT.

Plagiarism is sometimes the sincerest form of flattery; Plot elements identifiable from fics on Whispers, WIKTT and fanfiction.net are likely to be just that. To those who write them........ Wow.

To those who have read and enjoyed, I hope you continue to do so. I have read every review with pleasure.

Now on with the story:

Chapter Five: Prelude to the Park.

A sharp crack was heard throughout the drawing room, and if the current locale had been less populated by members of the gentler sex Lord Snape would have let forth with a bellow that would have done any on the Dock fronts proud; unfortunately he was not located in a place were such vulgar oration could take place, so he managed to hold himself to a single genteel "ouch".

At his utterance, the young lady, whom he reasoned to be Miss Granger and whose head had so recently introduced itself, looked up in mortification. "My Lord," she began, but was forestalled by the tips of Lord Snape's elegant fingers touching to her lips. This extreme breech of protocol passed unnoticed by the others in the drawing room; they were to busy indulging themselves in fits of the vapours.

"Hush child," Lord Snape began gently, "I haven't been planted such a facer since I last went a round with Gentleman Filch." However, if one was to be precise, it should be nothat hat Lord Snape's attempt so say something witty and self-depreciating went slightly astray; at least to judge by the look on Miss Granger's face.

On hearing his own voice Lord Snape could well understand the look the Miss Granger had given him. "I think my nose may have been broken." He tried to say, though on reflection it probably was a superfluous comment.

Miss Granger, easily having discerned what had happened, had pulled her wand from her right sleeve before he had even finished speaking. "Nasus Reparo." she said, fixing the damage that her head had caused. At least she hoped she had fixed it, Lord Snape was definitely handsome but his nose seemed awfully large; maybe it was the swelling, she reasoned.

Turning her attention to the rest of the gentleman Miss Granger was pleasantly surprised to find that he was not giving her the cut direct, nor had he a quizzing glass in hand. Given the magnitude of her offence, nose and Hessians, she was consideringselfself a very lucky lady.

The thought of his boots however bought a soft blush to her face; she could actually see the indentation where the journal had struck them, a crime of immense proportions. How immense she was bought to realise as a small furred individual separated himself from the Lord's shoulders and began to chatter at her loudly. Miss Granger's b was was put to flight at the sight of Lord Snape's pet ermine apparently reading her a dreadful scold.

"Draco," Lord Snape admonished as he felt his nose regain its normal profile, "there is no need to be rude.

"Miss?" He continued when Draco fell into the sulks, "I believe I have not had the pleasure." Lord Snape was well aware of whom she must be, but the great deities of forms sake must be acknowledge in polite society. Lord Snape noted with interest that the other ladies present did not seem to be as concerned with forms sake, as they ought; both failed to pick up the conversational gambit instead they continued their grand fits of histrionics.

Mrs Dursley, her lack of breeding and refinement made obvious, was shrieking like a fishwife. Alternately, shouted oaths at the sheer stupidity of Miss Granger and pleadings for her hartshorn, sounded out through the drawing room. The fact that the paint wasn't blistering under the uncouth onslaught was a miracle to be wondered at.

Miss Dursley on the other hand had simply contented herself by collapsing in a swoon, the sight of a gentleman's claret so over stimulating her genteel sensibilities.

Miss Granger had picked up the conversational gambit that Lord Snape had thrown to her host, but she was certain it had been drowned out by Mrs Dursley. Knowing she could not take it upon herself to complete the introductions Miss Granger turned back to face the room hoping she could entice Miss Dursley to complete the formalities. It was at that point she saw what Lord Snape had already observed, the fallen Miss and her uncouth mother.

The need to rouse Miss Dursley caused Miss Granger to start into the room, her hand reaching for a vinaigrette she kept in her reticule; she was not about to waste magic on a such an evident bit of posing.

Lord Snape, also desirous of an introduction, had hit upon the idea of rousing Miss Dursley to do the honours. He had even gone so far as to consider inviting the little mushroom to tool arothe the park with him, if it would garner him the required introduction.

As has been observed earlier, Lord Snape was somewhat taller than Miss Granger. Thus, as they both stepped forward, Lord Snape found his longer legs tangling in those of the shorter Miss Granger. The result, given the comedy of errors the day seemed intent on playing out was as predictable as it was troublesome. Pitching forward, and with nothing on which to catch himself, Lord Snape fell firmly on top of Miss Granger.

It was that precise sight which greeted the Dursley's butler as he finally entered the drawing room in answer to Mrs Dursley's cries. The look of horror that crossed his countenance would have done the Beau Lockhart proud, so reminiscent was it of the look the inestimable beau had given Lord Goyle when that worthy had attempted to set a new fashion by wearing his inexpressibles fully visible to the world; the fashion had not taken. "My Lord," he exclaimed a str strode forward to help Lord Snape to his feet.

That the butler had totally ignored the plight of the young lady on whom he had landed sent Lord Snape's estimation of the man and the household he served plummeting. Totally ignoring the others present in the room Lord Snape turned his attention to the lady at his feet. He was pleasantly surprised by what he saw, now that he could observe more than the top of her head.

She was fashionably attired, and whilst young ladies where generally discouraged from the wearing of darker colours it seemed Miss Granger had managed to convince, or failing that transfigured, a very stylish morning dress to a green just on the right side of suitable for a debutante; a colour that set her hair off to perfection. It was her eyes however that caught, and held his attention, clear and forthright. Lord Snape sensed that the child might well have actually been reading Ars Chemica; he would of course never have suspected that she not only subscribed to, but also contributed to the journal.

"My dear, I must offer my,"

"There is no need to go that far," Mrs. Dursley shriek cut across whatever Lord Snape had been about to say, "it was an accident my Lord, a most unfortunate accident. There really is nod tod to be offering for."

"Madam." his voice alive with fury at the sheer effrontery of the woman. "I was about to offer Miss Granger," he said ignoring the fact that they had ye to be formally introduced, " my abject apologises. It was clumsy in the extreme of me, and I wish to know how best I can make amends for my behaviour." Lord Snape finished saying, ever the gentleman.

Both Miss Granger and Lord Snape chose to ignore the palpable sigh of relief that escaped from Mrs. Dursley's lips. Instead, Miss Granger took the hand that Lord Snape offered her and allowed him to draw her to her feet. A task he did with considerable ease.

"As I was saying Miss Granger, before I was rudely interrupted, is there anything, I, your humble servant Severus Snape," he said completing the introduction, "can do to make amends? A tool around the Park, perhaps?

"Adequately chaperoned, of course," he continued on hearing the sharply indrawn breaths from those present.

Miss Granger, her hand still held by Lord Snape was possessed of an almost overwhelming desire to forego a tool around the Park in favour of an afternoon in the Lord of Potions library. This desire was so far outside the bounds of propriety that she was required to ruthlessly squashed any further thought on that subject lest she blurt out like a green schoolgirl her desire.

"I would be delighted Sir, I have not as yet has a chance to view the Park this Season. I am told it is a wondrous sight." Miss Granger said telytely as she finally withdrew her hand from the Lord's grasp; both found themselves surprising bereft when the touch was ended.


TBC Jeanette