Be Careful in the Dark

Chapter 47: Snippet [I hadn't written in the emotions they would be experiencing from each other or the fight.]

“Why didn’t you tell me?  Why keep this secret?”  Harry’s voice was empty and Hermione searched his face for some glimmer of what he wanted to hear.  He gave her nothing.

“In the beginning, I didn’t know how to tell.  I started and stopped so many times… I just didn’t know what to say.  And then, then…”  She stopped and shifted in her seat.

“And then?”  Harry prompted, voice noticeably colder.

“I got to like having a secret.”  Hermione whispered the truth and felt guilt spread through her like a burn.

****

“Fight with me, Harry.”  Hermione said to his slumped back.

“What?”  His whole body stiffened as he spoke.

“You heard me.  We have trained together, as Shadow and Harry the Auror.  We’ve studied together, as Hermione and Harry the Student.  Fight me.  All of me.”  Her voice cracked at the last word.

Silence filled the room and she thought this must be end.  How can this be the end?

And then his voice, like ice water over stone, echoed in the empty room.  “Fine.”

****

Hermione: well, what then?

Harry: You look at me like I’m not special.  I’m just this guy who tripped over his own feet into something. 

Hermione: What are you talking about?  Harry, you’re amazing.  I saw you take out [refer to the night in the rain, the raid.] 

Harry: [Waves a hand in front of his face.]  That’s not what I mean.  Alright, you know the [name of the tri-cup wizarding thing I can't remember the name of right now].  I could have gotten out of that.  I could have disqualified myself.  But I wanted to believe that I was special.  That I could do it, take out Voldemort and win.  And you know what, I wasn’t special.  I totally fucked that all up.  I mean...  [Harry shook his head and then scrubbed his face with both his hands.] I was arrogant and so unbelievably foolish.  The only reason I didn’t die was because Tom Riddle wasn’t ready for me to.  It took me a long time, too long, to realize that I wasn’t special.  I was going to have to tear the life out of that damn snake with my bare fingers and I was totally and utterly normal.  What the hell was I gonna do?  You know half of why I got as far as I did I do is pure, dumb luck.  You aren’t the “boy who lived” and you fight tooth and nail.  You know it’s not me.  You’re one of two people who do that for me. 

Hermione: Me and Ron?

Harry: You and Luna.

Hermione: Me and.. ? So why sleep with me?  Why not sleep with Luna?

Harry: [clears throat.]  I do.

Hermione: [splutters. ]

Harry: Did I miss something?  Were we monogamous?

Hermione: No!  It’s just… it’s just… I don't know.  Who else are you sleeping with?  Neville?

Harry: [grins]  Are you sure you want to talk about our other lovers, Hermione Granger?  Because if we are, I’ve got some doozies about a fellow named Severus.

Hermione: [looks away].  Point taken.

Harry:  Can we be done talking, now? 

Hermione: yeah.  I’m good.  Goodnight, Harry.