Deserving (Final Chapter)

A/N Hi everyone. I had to post this today. I have been so busy with my final project that is due on May 12, it is killing me. I have had no time to do fun things like write or read “The Help” (the novel that sits by my bed unread). But today is my birthday so I woke up very early and this is what I wrote. I so wanted to share with all of you on this my 47th birthday. I feel so blessed. I have a great husband and two great kids and all of you who make me feel like an “author”. Thanks!

After going back to school for this URRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! Training which has done nothing but show me how old and out of touch I am it is great to open my email and find reviews that tell me I am good at something. And it is kind of cool that so many of you are collage girls. I AM NOT SO OUT OF TOUCH!

Hope you like this chapter. I know you all liked the Centaurs and even though they are here just to have our boys reflect they still add sexiness to the chapter.

OH! I am sending this to my Beta as I am posting it. So if that bothers you please come back in a couple of days after Ellie has fixed all my blunders.




Chapter 45

Severus watched as the sun came in flooding their bedroom with its warmth. He closed his eyes in an attempt to retrieve to darkness where a creature like him belonged. His eyes popped open when he felt Harry’s body reacting to their proximity.

“Good morning,” said Harry with a sleepy voice as he kissed Severus’ neck tracing a road of kisses and nibbles from Severus neck to his ear.

“Sir, you said…”

“I said, and I quote: I will not take you tonight. Look around Severus, the sun is shining. It’s a new beginning. Now, I think I can take what I so desire,” he said pressing Severus’ body to himself and trying to reach his husband’s mouth finding it to be an impossible task. He decided he needed Severus on his back so he moved over and guided Severus onto the desired position.

“That’s better. Now I can taste your lips.”

Severus raised his head eagerly into the kiss. Harry burry his tongue deep within Severus’ throat and he was pleased when he heard the Potions Master mew.

“Go tend to your morning needs and get rid of the nightgown. Lot of good it did,” Harry said confirming his statement by placing Severus’ hand to his groin. “Go, hurry back.”

Severus got up and went into the washroom his head spinning with the unknown. Harry had forgiven him. Harry wanted him. Harry was going to take him. All had been forgiven. Could it be? He shook his head. He was not about to question his luck. Life had smiled at him so very few times that when it did he was determined to embrace it. His husband had forgiven him and now wanted him. He hurried with his morning rituals and took off the nightgown rejoining Harry promptly.

“Shall I prepare for you, Sir?” Severus said looking down at his husband’s naked body on the bed.

“No, Severus,” Harry said outstretching his arms to welcome his husband back into their bed. Severus fell into the embrace with closed eyes and a deep sigh. “Let me enjoy you in my arms naked,” said Harry with a little chuckle. I’ve missed this. I love it when you are pregnant with my child but I miss it when our children take so much of your time away from me.”

Severus did not want to open his eyes. He was enjoying Harry’s embrace and his words. They kissed and fondled until Harry came up for air giving the command. “Show me Severus; show me what you’re offering. How you’re giving yourself to me.”

Severus immediately got on his hands and knees.

“Ummmm,” said Harry as if savoring a juicy treat. “More, show me more,” he demanded.

Severus placed his head on the mattress to support his upper body and used his hands to spread his cheeks apart for Harry.

“Oh, Severus, you’re killing me. That… that is so…” and he kissed the offered entrance. Then he licked it sending chills through Severus’ body making him moan in need. Harry took that as a cue and using his own hands to pry Severus open he inserted his tongue making Severus scream. Harry’s heart did a little dance at hearing his husband come undone.

“Sir, please. Please, Sir,” but Severus had no idea what he was asking for.

Harry got up and Accio the lube. He inserted three fingers in the jar and then went back to Severus’ entrance. He inserted the first one without difficulty.

“Always so tight,” moaned Harry. The second finger took a little more work until Harry figured out that it would be easier to take out the first finger and use that one to guide the second. It worked beautifully and Harry enjoyed watching part of his body disappear into his husband’s body. He remembered how opened the plug had left Severus and his fantasy of putting his whole hand inside of Severus, but today didn’t seem a good day either. He was about to take out the two fingers so as to guide the third one in when he heard his husband’s plea.

“No, Sir, please not another finger. I am ready and I wish to be tight for you. I will be able to give you greater pleasure in my present state.”

Harry wanted to do as Severus asked. He so wanted to penetrate his husband; to take his pleasure, but he did not want to hurt Severus. Severus seemed to have read his mind.

“The lube will not allow you to hurt me. It is magical. Only a dab is needed, the manual stretching is for your pleasure,” said Severus a mist shallow breaths.


This news was welcomed by Harry who wasted no time in penetrating his husband. He watched as the Slytherin banged his fist on the mattress and turned his head from side to side. He was giving his husband pleasure. He enjoyed knowing that no one before him had ever given this man pleasure. Severus belonged to him. The idea almost drove him over the top, but he had to make sure that Severus’ needs were met. He reached down under his husband and grabbed Severus’ manhood. It only took a couple of jerks before Snape shot his load with a gasp of air. Harry had to bite his lips in an effort to keep his children from hearing his rumpus as he shot his load into his husband’s tight body.

“Stay still,” Harry demanded as he reached over to the night stand and grabbed the butt plug from the drawer. He inserted it carefully then allowed Severus and himself to lie down on their backs.

“I so needed that,” said Harry staring at the ceiling.

“I am sorry, Sir, I will not disappoint you again,” said Severus laden in guilt.

Harry had not intended on giving Snape a guilt trip. He got on his side and pulled Severus to his side so they could face each other.

“You have my seed in you, but you must promise me that you will take the plug out as soon as you have the need to use the loo or it bothers you in any way. Is that understood? Remember, I want you to take care of yourself.”

Severus nodded bringing their foreheads together. Soon the children were up and it became a typical Saturday morning. After breakfast, Harry took Richard for a ride on his fastest broom. They stopped at Honydukes for some treats and Harry picked up some of Severus favorite chocolates. When Harry and Richard got home Harry noticed that Severus was crestfallen. Harry went to him and wrapped him in his arms. He did not have to ask, Severus offered the information. As soon as Harry had left Severus had the urge to use the bathroom. He had failed to keep the plug in for at least the morning. Harry kissed him in the cheek.

“I am so proud of you,” he said with that boyish smile that Severus so enjoyed.

But Severus didn’t understand what it was that made Harry proud of him. He had failed. And as if Harry could read his mind…

“You are learning to take care of your needs. That’s all I’ve asked of you; that you take care of yourself as much as you do the children and I,” said Harry lifting Severus’ chin with a finger.

Richard began to taunt his fathers again. “Oh brother, look Serena, they are in l o v e,” he said with a sing song voice. Harry chuckled at his son then he turned to Severus again and whispered in his ear.

“When the imps take a nap, I will be sure to replace your loss,” he said with a wicked smile and he kept his promise. After Severus put the children down for their nap he found Harry waiting for him in their bed. He joined his spouse and soon he was filled and plugged. He rested on Harry’s chest content with the path that life had traced for him.

“So what do you normally do when they are taking a nap and I am at work?” asked Harry stroking Severus’ long silky hair.

Severus did not answer and Harry felt him move uncomfortably under his hand.

“Severus?”

The Slytherin took a deep breath and answered. “Mr. Longbottom comes and we work on the antidote,” he said expecting a poor reaction from his husband.

“How is that coming along?” asked Harry surprising his husband.

Severus took a second to recover then answered. “We have hit a standstill.”

“But I thought you said that once you knew the potion that had been used you could figure out the antidote.”

“And I have but the Ministry used Mandragora in their potion.”

“So they used Mandrake, what’s the problem in that.”

Severus rolled his eyes. His husband had wasted the better part of seven years at Hogwarts and did not know the basics.

“Sir, as you will remember from you potions lessons at Hogwarts, there are only two known antidotes for Mandragora which are?” he said expecting Harry to fill in the blank.

“Severus, we both know I am no good at Potions, so why don’t you fill ME in.”

“Mandragora or Mandrake as you prefer to call it can only be countered by two nearly impossible ingredients: placenta from the birth of a unicorn or the still beating heart of a hippogriff.”

“You’re jesting; right?”

“I am afraid not, Sir.”

“So the Mark Ones have no hope because there is no way we are sacrificing Buckbeak and unless you are on a first name basis with a lady unicorn they are basically screwed.”


“Sir, may I remind you that unicorns do not speak so the whole first name piece is nil. But as luck will have it there is hope for my little snakes. Hagrid is on it. It seems he has found a berry that the unicorns favor and he has been feeding an adult female for quite some time now.”

“Is she pregnant,” asked Harry sitting up and bringing his husband to an upright position to better discuss the matter.

“We have no way of knowing, Sir, we can only hope.”

“So we wait forever?”

“No, Sir, as you well remember from your lessons on Mystical Creatures, Unicorns give birth on the first full moon of the Spring equinox, so Hagrid will know exactly when to look for the foal,” explained Severus to Harry who really had no idea when unicorns did anything.

“So the Marked ones will have to wait six more months. Does Kingsley know about this?”

“Yes, Sir, he has been making sure that Hagrid has enough of the rare raspberries to keep the mare interested.”

“What is so rare about raspberries? I think we have some growing in our garden; don’t we?”

“Yes, Sir, we do have common raspberries growing in our garden but the unicorns fancy the ones that were not tinted by Ida’s blood.”

Harry looked at him with a puzzled look and Severus decided it was best to explain.

“According to legend, raspberries were originally white. The nymph Ida pricked her finger while picking berries for the crying infant Jupiter, and raspberries have since been tinged red with her blood. The botanical name of the raspberry is Rubus idaeus. Rubus means 'red', and idaeus means 'belonging to Ida'.”

“So Kings has access to white raspberries?”

Severus nodded his head. “Yes, it seems that in the Americas there is a tribe of Indians that have succeeded in harvesting the forgotten white raspberries. We have been using them in potions for years but it has always been in minimal amounts but the unicorn seems to have a healthy appetite for them.”

“Are they expensive?”

“Very much so, I have made an order using my funds. I do not believe that Mr. Shacklebolt should assume the total cost of this ingredient.”

“Severus, you do not need to use your funds for this. You can take from our account.”

“The gain from my lab is there and it should yield some kind of good use.”

“Well, put me in for an order. I don’t want Kingsley in the poor house just because he wants to see if Ferret Face really loves him.”

“As you wish, Sir,” said Severus getting out of bed knowing that his children will soon be up from their nap.

***

Soon the Holidays had arrived and Harry had the perfect gift for Severus. On Christmas Eve and after the children were in bed, Harry apparated with Severus to the Forbidden Forest. To Harry’s surprise Shan and Amador were waiting for them with lanterns in hand in the precise spot where they appeared. Severus had not expected such a thoughtful gift from his husband and walked to Amador who guided him away from Shan and Harry.

“You were expecting us?” said Severus breaking the silence of the moonless night in the forest.

“Your mate and your firstborn are getting along well,” said Amador in that annoying way that his kind has of not answering questions.

“Yes, it seems my inability to give Richard my full attention has driven him closer to his dad,” said Severus in an equally nonchalant way of speaking.

“Your mate ignores your feelings,” said the Centaur walking with the lantern held high above their heads.

“No, that is not true. He takes care of all of my needs. He brought me here because he knew that I wanted to speak to you.”

Amador stopped and turned to Severus. “Speak your mind, Severus.” But Severus averted his eyes. He did not know if he could ask any of the questions roaming his mind.

“Why do you fear telling him about your desire; your need?”

“It is not a need. He tends to all my needs. He is very thoughtful and treats me like no other person has,” argued the Potions Master.

Amador continue to walk in silence.

“Perhaps, if your mate would speak to my mate…” suggested Severus.

“Shan is very wise.”

“Yes, I know that is why I was saying that perhaps he would guide Harry or make him understand… Never mind. I have more than I ever thought possible and look at me wanting more.”

“The absence of the moon has made it a dark night,” said the centaur stating the obvious as he sat by a tree and motioned for Severus to take a seat on one of the huge roots that were entangling the earth.

“On our way to meet you and your mate my mate rammed me against this big tree. If not for my quick reflexes, which made me lift up my hands and control the impact my head would have been smashed against it. I hugged the tree as my mate took me without much ado. Do you know why that act felt so right, Severus?”

Severus found it hard to breath let alone answer. The picture drawn by Amador was overwhelming. He simply shook his head.

Amador looked at Severus as if he could look into the Potions Master soul. “My mate knew that I would be ready. He knew that my hands would prevent the impact and that my body would be ready to serve him. He trusted me. His hooves hover over me menacingly but I knew he would never harm me. I trust him.” He looked up into the sky again. “It is a dark night.”

“My mate punished me for harming myself. He did not copulate with me that night. I felt miserable,” said Severus not raising his gaze.

“You must have felt his hatred towards you,” prompted the all knowing creature.

“NO!” protested Severus. “Harry does not hate me. He did it because he knew that is what I needed. He did it so all would be forgiven and forgotten. He does not hate me. He has not despised me in a long time,” said the Slytherin hearing the words out loud and not knowing where they had come from but knowing instantly that he had spoken the truth.

“It is a very murky night,” noticed the centaur.


***

Meanwhile Harry was following a very silent Shan. He was hoping that the centaur would be forthcoming. He imagined this whole situation in a very different way. He had imagined that he would arrive and Shan would begin to tell him stories just like Severus had described Amador doing. But this old mule was mute. Not one single word came out of him. Harry saw him pick up a branch and tie a string to it and to Harry’s utter amazement the centaur began to fish and look into the water as if he could spot something in this dark forest.

“Look, it’s like this, Severus is my mate. We are married because that is what decent wizards do. He has given me two extraordinary kids. Well, you know of one of them but we have an older one at home. His name is Richard and he is amazing. Well, of course he is amazing; anyone who knows Severus wouldn’t expect anything less than amazing from him. See, he is the type of person who does everything right. I can’t even explain it. It’s like my friend Hermione but Severus isn’t annoying about it. Well, actually he used to be but now that he is my… Well, you know… he is more… Well, I don’t have to explain things to you because you have Amador and you know how things are. And don’t get me wrong, I don’t go around punishing Severus so everyone knows what I do like you do with that plug and the whole village thing,” said Harry stopping to consider his words.

“Unless you count the fact that… that I raped him and everyone knows that. And there is the fact that I wouldn’t give him decent clothes for the longest time. Poppy got very upset about that. And well I do think that most people know how cruel I was to him but I didn’t do it to show that I was su pe rior” Harry felt deflated. He ran his fingers through his messy hair.

“You wouldn’t understand. No one would; really. I did things and I don’t know how to make it up to him or even say I am sorry. I don’t think he needs to hear me say it. No, he doesn’t,” he said reflectively “But you see I need to tell him. It’s just that I don’t know how. And I try to do everything right so he won’t remember all the awful things I did to him. And I don’t think he does think about them… but… the thing is … I do,” he said picking up a pebble and skipping it over the water.

Shan turned with an angry glare at Harry. He probably shouldn’t have disrupted the water the centaur was trying to fish in.

***


Back home Harry took Severus’ cloak and hung it in the coat closet near the unused main entrance. When he came back to Severus he guided him to the sofa were he sat next to him. Harry took a deep breath:
“We have to talk,” Harry said. Then considering his words he rectified by saying: “I have to talk.”