Haunted

For Hermione, the first week back dragged on. No matter what she did she couldn’t seem to figure out her way around. Ginny was reading a book about the coping mechanisms of blind people (which touched Hermione deeply as Ginny loathed books of every kind) and told her she needed to assess her surroundings so she would feel more comfortable in her environment. She was trying to memorize everything, really, she was. But every time she thought she had the number of steps and turns down, it seemed like something moved. She knew it was crazy because Ginny insisted everything was as it was when she had been able to see. Frustration mounted as nothing seemed to becoming any easier: not eating, walking or sleeping. Her dreams were vivid, full of light and movement and she would wake up in sweat and tears and try for hours to see. To no avail. She was as blind as ever.

It didn’t help that everyone seemed to be catering to Draco. Why was he getting such special treatment? He was a traitor, a liar, a Death Eater! Everyone seemed to trust him now because he had saved her. What did it matter? He only did it for exactly this reason. They were falling right into his hands.

It was lunchtime eight days after her return. Harry was visiting her, Ron helping Fred and George in the shop for the weekend and it was just the three of them. He led her downstairs and she joked about his lunch which he had prepared.

“So, Potter, what are we having today?”

Hermione jumped at Malfoy’s annoying voice, not having heard him come in. He always seemed to be so quiet.

“Here, let me get that chair for you, Malfoy. We had a meeting, someone must have left it,” Harry said and Hermione heard the scraping of chair legs on the wood floor.

“Is there a reason Malfoy can’t pull his own bloody chair out? Is he physically incapable?”

There was a thick silence before Harry spoke. “Yes, Hermione. He is.”

Hermione felt flushed and cold all at the same time. “What?”

“For your information, Granger, I can’t move my legs. Happy? Do you feel fulfilled to know that you disabled the great Draco Malfoy with your stupidity?”

“Malfoy, she didn’t know, none of us knew-,”

“You were careless! All of you! I thought you knew better than to try Dark magic without covering all your bases first, Granger. Now look where it’s gotten us. You’ll never see again and I’ll never walk again, all because of your inanity. Did I forget to thank you?”

Hermione placed her shaky hands on the table and pushed herself off her chair. She threw her numb body up the staircase, tripping on her way up several times in her haste. Harry called her name but she didn’t stop. She ran up to the fourth floor and crashed into the one place she used to call her sanctuary, the musty smell of parchment filled her nose as she let out a sob and collapsed between one of the rows of books, she couldn’t tell which one. Curling onto the floor she cried harshly, hating the knowledge that Malfoy was absolutely right.

*****************************************************

Draco glided up the stairs, passing his room. He’d tired of Potter’s monologue and had left in search of something better to do. He’d felt a deep-seated satisfaction at the look on Granger’s face when Potter had told her he was all but paralyzed. He was floating past the fourth floor when he saw a door that was partially ajar. Sneaking a peek inside, he noticed it was a library of sorts. Five bookshelves filled the small room and two tables with the same amount of chairs were all but packed in. A fireplace and two windows were the only other things in there. Unless you were counting the girl curled up on the closest window seat in a patch of spring sunlight, her eyes closed, her face lifted towards the light.

“I can feel it,” she said suddenly. He stared at her and thought about leaving before she noticed he was there but she kept talking. “The sun.”

When he said nothing she sighed. “I felt you come into the room. It’s like a shift in the air. Just like I can feel the warmth of the sun, but I can’t see it. There’s nothing.”

She turned to him, eyes open and stared about three feet from where he sat, floating obscenely three feet off the ground.

“I want to apologize for my rudeness. I wasn’t aware that you…”

He shifted uncomfortable in his chair. Granger was apologizing? “Don’t mention it.”

“I will. And I will apologize as well for my carelessness a few weeks ago. As I’ve heard told you saved my life. I will thank you for that.”

Draco didn’t know what to say. He’d never been so uncomfortable in his life. He wanted to turn around and leave but he was rooted to the spot. When she spoke again, he wished he had left.

“Why did you?”

“What are you talking about, Granger?”

“You know what I’m talking about. Why did you save me? Why didn’t you just leave me for dead?”

She spoke so calmly and her face had turned back to the window, though he didn’t know why as she couldn’t see what was below. She looked as if she didn’t even care about the answer, she was merely making conversation.

He said nothing. She didn’t need to know. Finally, having had enough, he turned his chair with a twirl of his wand and slid back out of the door. Before he’d gone more than a few feet, he heard her call back:

“If you do anything to hurt them I will kill you. Vision or no, I can. And I will.”

“Is that a threat?” he growled, looking back at her.

“No,” she looked towards him and locked her sightless eyes onto his. “It’s a promise.”

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The next day Ginny came and found Hermione in the drawing room.

“Hey, Hermione!” her cheery voice sounded from the doorway. Hermione turned towards the voice with a smile and felt her sit down on the floor next to her.

“Why are you on the floor?” she asked, concern laced in her voice. “Did you fall again?”

“No, just enjoying the warm sunlight,” she said. She’d felt the heat of the hardwood in this spot and had lain on it a while ago. There was nothing in this house to cure her boredom so she simply wandered aimlessly and found places to stop. Usually when she got herself turned around and couldn’t find her way back to her room.

“Oh. Well, I brought you something.”

“Ginny, you don’t have to-,”

“I know. But I want to. See, I’ve been doing lots of research, Ron and Harry too. I haven’t been able to find anything in any of our books so I went to a Muggle shop.”

“Ginny Weasley! Dost mine ears deceive me? You actually went into a Muggle store? A Muggle book store?”

“Yes, well, now you know how much to appreciate my effort!”

Hermione laughed. “Oh, Ginny, that wasn’t necessary-,”

“Hush, will you?” she huffed. “Now stand up.”

“Why?”

“Do it!”

Rolling her useless eyes, Hermione heaved herself off the floor and Ginny grabbed her hand and placed something into it. Something long and somewhat thin…

“Ginny, you didn’t…”

“Do you know what it is?” Ginny asked, sounding slightly disappointed that she couldn’t surprise her.

Hermione sighed. “Yes, Muggles use them. Ginny…I don’t know what to say…”

“Thank you?”

“Thanks, Gin.”

Hermione’s heart had fallen into her stomach and her eyes watered as she ran her hand down the shaft of the walking stick.

“The book says it will take some getting used to, but we can help. Around here you can get on without it pretty well for the most part, but you can’t very well go outside without one-,”

“Gin, I’m not going outside. Not like this, not where people can see me.”

“But Hermione, you can’t stay cooped up in here all the time. I know it will be hard at first but it will get easier.”

“Gin, I can’t let them see me like this.”

“Hermione! Are you listening to yourself? What happened to you? Since when did you care what others thought about you? Not counting teachers, of course.”

“Gin, it’s a sign of my failure. I’m not brooding, just facing the facts. I messed up and now I’ll suffer the consequences. But I’ll be damned if I’ll be a burden to you guys. This was really sweet of you, Gin, and I will work with it, but don’t put yourself out anymore. There’re more important things to attend to. Has Lavender gotten any more information out of Dolohov?”

“Not yet. And don’t change the subject! I know you’re upset, but we’re going to help. You would do the same thing for any of us so let us do the same for you. We love you, Hermione, and you’re not a failure. It was one mistake which none of us knew about. There’d been no indication! We were just lucky Malfoy was there.”

Hermione snorted.

“Give him a chance, will you? He saved your life and the rest of ours too.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, when he dragged you out from that crater he told us all to run. It’s a good thing we did too, because when we went back afterward, there was nothing there. Nothing, Hermione. Just black earth and that crater the first explosion made. He knew something was going to happen. He saved our necks, even brought back the cup and your wand. I know what he did last time was unforgivable, but maybe this time he’s serious. He tried so hard last time, you remember!”

“I also remember him leaving us high and dry when we needed him the most!”

Ginny was quiet and Hermione scolded herself.

“Look, Ginny, I’m trying. Really. But he can do too much damage, he could ruin everything.”

“He didn’t last time! After he left he never gave away out whereabouts.”

“He wasn’t secret-keeper. Remus is. He couldn’t.”

“Yes, well, he didn’t tell them any other information, did he? Maybe he’s not all bad.”

“Look, we gave him a second chance and he betrayed us. He could have gotten Harry killed, or do you not care about that?”

“Hermione, that’s not fair! You know I love Harry but I don’t think Draco’s all he makes himself out to be. Maybe he was just scared.”

“Scared of not being around his house-elves and fancy mansion.”

“What has gotten into you? If you don’t recall, you were one of the first ones to bring him in last time! Who was the one who reached out? Who tried to bring him out of his shell?”

“Yeah, and look where it got us.”

Ginny huffed. “Well, I can see this is getting us nowhere. Look, I didn’t come here to fight. Just, trust me one this, okay?”

Hermione said nothing. “Thank you for bringing this by. I’ll work on it. I think I’m going to rest for a while,” she said and moved past Ginny, pulling the walking stick back and forth upon the ground as she had seen blind people do. She felt it hit the couch on her right, her memory supplying her with the item’s image.

She never saw the man sitting just feet outside the door and did not hear him as he made his way silently back up the stairs.

She made her way to her room and flopped onto the bed, the metal rod clattering to the ground. She felt Ginny’s presence at the door (which she had forgotten to shut) but Hermione pretended she didn’t and kept her eyes closed, feigning sleep. A moment later, she left and Hermione rolled onto her other side. Eventually, images of the country around her parent’s home soothed her to sleep.


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A/N: Hope you are enjoying this, things will start picking up very, very soon.

Jillianspuzzlebox: Thanks for the information! I am giving her the walking stick and one other thing later, but most of the “Muggle” devises that the average-everyday-Joe wouldn’t know about will not come into play as she will be finding other magical ways to cope. I really enjoyed everything you said though! It is very nice to know that you approve of how I portray her; I’m trying to make it as realistic as possible. The info was great.

tafod-y-sarff: You will have to wait and see about Draco ;)

XOXO

RynStar15