The Fallen

Chapter 4

Harry paused to catch his breath only long enough to scan the surrounding dungeons around Severus’s quarters to make sure no Slytherins were in the immediate vicinity. Then, without any further hesitation, he knocked loudly on the professor’s door. “Se… Severus?” he asked, only loud enough to be heard through the door.

When he received no reply, he knocked again and called to the man; louder this time. “Severus! Come on, I know you’re in there! Let me in!” He was beginning to worry. Was he unable to come to the door? Was he really hurt and maybe passed out? Harry had no idea why he was so concerned, but he did not pause to think about it. Instead he pulled his wand and aimed it at the door. “Alohamora!” he muttered, surprised when the door actually clicked open. He would have thought Snape to be a person who would have much stronger locks on his doors.

Hesitantly, Harry entered, walking to the door that led to Severus’s personal chambers. Opening the door, he paused at seeing the Professor slumped in an armchair looking haggard and worn.

Severus turned his head at Harry’s entrance, raising an inquisitive brow in annoyance at the disturbance. However, a strange emotion, almost like gratitude, flickered swiftly across his features.

“What are you doing in my rooms, Harry?’ Severus asked, turning back to his fire.

Taking this as an ok, Harry shut the door behind him and sat down in an armchair. “I dunno. I wanted to make sure you weren’t dead.”

“And I suppose breaking into my rooms is the best way to find out?” Severus inquired.

“Oh, so sorry I was worried abo-“ Harry cut himself short and looked away.

Severus raised his eyebrows and sighed.

“What happened, Severus?” Harry asked, looking over at the older man. “Why are you so worn out?”

Noticing genuine worry in the teen’s voice, Severus massaged his knuckles and spoke. “It was a ceremony,” he said, “One of the Dark Lord’s ways to ensure that his followers are… obedient.”
”Well the Potions substitute is terrible,” Harry said, as if they had been talking about Potions class all along. Severus turned to look at him, confused. “He’s a right git, you know,” Harry said, turning to Severus and grinning.

“I’m sure he’s not quite as terrible as me, is he?” Severus replied, smirking.

“No sir. The students haven’t been nearly as terrified as they should be.”

“Is that so?”

They stared into the fire for a long moment. Harry broke the silence.

“I’m getting tired of the letters,” he said.

Severus felt a lump rise in his throat. “You want to stop writing?”

“I…” Harry paused, contemplating his words carefully, “I would like to talk to you in person.”

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea Harry,” Severus replied cautiously. He wanted to talk in person just as much as Harry did, but for some reason his conscience was screaming at him.

“Oh, come on, Severus,” Harry insisted, looking over at his Professor with puppy dog eyes. “What in the world is so dangerous about it?”

Severus knew full well what was so dangerous about it, but he wasn’t about to say it. “Nothing… I suppose.”

“Then it’s settled,” Harry said, looking pleased, “How about I come in after supper?”

“That seems suitable.”

“Great! I’ll write one more letter to you in class tomorrow,” Harry replied, standing up, “I have to go now, but I’ll see you tomorrow, right? You’ll be teaching?”

“Yes, I’ll be teaching,” Severus answered, “Get going. You don’t need your friends sending a search party for you.”

Harry grinned. “I suppose not. I kind of just ran out on them, so I should get back. See you later, Severus!” He waved and left, leaving Severus to contemplate the new arrangement between the two.

“This can’t be good…” Severus groaned, rubbing his temples. “Why the hell did I agree anyway? He’s really getting under my skin somehow.”

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Harry couldn’t shove the smile off his face as he entered the Gryffindor common room.

“Bloody hell, mate!” Ron exclaimed jumping up from the couch at the entrance of his best friend. “What was that all about at lunch? You worried us!”

Hermoine nodded emphatically beside the redhead.

“Sorry guys, I really needed to ask Dumbledore a question,” Harry answered, his expression changed to embarrassment.

Hermoine took on a look of concern. “What it your scar or something about Voldemort?”

Harry shook his head, “No! It wasn’t that big of a deal, really. You don’t need to worry.”

“He doesn’t wasn’t to talk about it ‘Mione,” Ron said after a moment. “Want to play chess, Harry?” He jerked his thumb back at the table where he had been setting up Wizard’s Chess just moments before Harry’s arrival.

Harry smiled. “Yeah, sure. I’m just going to go do something really quick, ok?”

Ron nodded, his eyes still wary of Harry’s strange behavior, and sat back at the table to finish putting up the pieces.

Harry found the dorm room to be completely empty. For this, he was grateful. It would give him a moment to write Severus a letter in peace. He couldn’t believe Severus had agreed to let him come to his quarters after supper. What would they do? Would they be able to talk as freely when in person? Harry was nervous, but excited as well. This, however, brought thought to a new question. Why was he so excited? Why, earlier, had he been so worried about Severus when he had not returned? They had become friends at least; in their own, subtle way. Why then did Harry feel so anxious? He felt comfortable talking to the man in writing, but when it came to face-to-face conversations, Harry did not know if he would fare so well.

He decided it was something he would worry about when the time came. Pulling out a piece of parchment and his quill, he began to scratch yet another letter to a certain Potions Professor. As soon as he finished, he set the paper inside his book bag and set off to play chess with Ron.

………………………………..

They sat in the great hall that same night, chatting happily and swooning over the various dishes that had appeared on the tables for supper.

“So then Fred threw a bludger at me!” Ron fumed, “Knocked me right in the head, it did! I fell right of the broom.”

“Doesn’t surprise me, Weasley,” Malfoy snickered from the table behind them.

“Oh, bugger off Malfoy,” Harry growled, whirling around to face his rival, “You aren’t part of this conversation.”

“Oh Master Potter has commanded me,” Malfoy mocked, waving his hands daintily in the air as Crabbe and Goyle guffawed unintelligently.

Harry turned back around, but something caught his eye half way. It was Severus. He was up at the staff table with a fork in his hand, looking over at Harry. He had obviously been observing the exchange. Now, however, his concentration was fully on Harry. Their eyes were locked together and neither seemed willing to move from the strange sort of staring contest. Harry didn’t know why, but Severus’s pensive gaze made his heart race. It seemed as if their thoughts had entwined for the few seconds they froze there. Ron, however, managed to cut off the connection.
”Malfoy’s a right ass!” the gangly teen hissed through his clenched teeth. “I can’t believe him. He always has so much nerve!”

Hermoine sighed and Harry regrettably broke the visual conversation he had going with the raven-haired professor. “He’s been like that his whole life, Ron,” Harry comforted, “We all know he’s an arse. Even he does.”

Ron pouted his lower lip and shoved another mouthful of mashed potatoes into his mouth, chewing enthusiastically.

“Ron!” Hermoine gasped, “Don’t be so disgusting.”

“Don be sush a pwude Haminny,” Ron retorted through his mouthful.

Hermoine rolled her eyes in exasperation and turned back to her food, picking at it softly.

Harry smiled and turned back to Severus. He was gone. Harry couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed. The man wasn’t required to just sit there all night, though. Shrugging it off, Harry finished his meal and went on with the night, barely able to complete his homework as thoughts of what were to come the next day ran rampant through his mind.

…………………………………………………..

The room was silent save for the sounds of scratching quills and shuffling parchment. Severus had given them an essay about what they had covered in class while he was “away”. It was an odd assignment, for him at least, but no one objected to the easy task.

“Snape’s acting a little odd, isn’t he?” Ron whispered to Harry.

Harry looked over to him, surprised. “You really think so?” He didn’t say much more. He was concentrating on slowing the raging heartbeat that had started when he had heard Severus’s name. Weird. Maybe it was because he was so used to talking to him, but not about him.

“Yeah, I mean he hasn’t jabbed nearly as many insults at us and he gave us an essay that didn’t have some terrible theme that we knew nothing about,” Ron explained, getting excited as he thought up a scandal.

“I’m sure it’s nothing Ron,” Harry replied, “Everyone has their off days.”

“Harry’s right Ron,” Hermoine interjected, “You don’t have to question every move he makes just because you don’t like him.”

“Don’t like him?” Ron replied, “He loathes us! Of course I don’t like him.”

“That’s not the point Ron,” Hermoine was getting agitated, “Write your paper or we’ll all get in trouble. I don’t want to get a detention today.”

Ron exhaled, defeated. “Fine then…” he muttered, picking up his quill and contemplating what to write.

Harry had finished his essay over fifteen minutes ago, he had be re-reading his letter to Severus when Ron interrupted him. Now that Ron was once again distracted, Harry trned back to his paper and started over.

Severus,

I suppose this will be the last letter I write you. That’s not a bad thing, though, since we’ll be talking in person. I was glad that you said yes to meet after suppers. I’m kind of tired of writing. It would be nicer to actually talk, don’t you think?

I know we’re probably not friends or anything, at least not what most people would classify as friends, but I think my plan is turning out well.

I don’t know why, but I did like writing these letters. It was relaxing in it’s own way. It was nice to talk to someone who had experiences like I had. We may not be exactly the same, but I definitely think we’re similar. Don’t you?

This turned out a lot better than I expected, to be honest. I thought you would either completely refuse or it would end really fast, but somehow we’ve kept going. It’s strange. I never pictured myself talking to you; telling you the things that I did. Sorry if I’m getting too sentimental. I’ll stop. I’m just trying to say that I really think this was worth it.

I hope you think the same thing. After all, it hasn’t worked if we both don’t agree.

Anyway, I suppose I should go. I just figured you should know what I thought. See you after supper.

-Harry

Harry nodded and folded the paper once more. It would do. He hoped he hadn’t sounded childish in it, but he couldn’t help feeling a little embarrassed at some of the cheesy things he had said. Taking a clip, he attached the essay and letter together just as the Professor stood to speak.

“Time is up,” his velvety voice flowed over the room, causing an immediate reaction of quills falling to tables. “Bring you essays up to me,” He glanced at Harry. It was so subtle that Harry barely caught it, but he did catch it. “And you may go.”

There was a scraping of chairs and the students flung their papers onto the front desk. Harry, however, laid his lightly down, noticing how Severus’s eyes had followed his hand as he did so. Not willing to risk a smile to the Potions Master in front of his classmates, Harry caught up with Ron and Hermoine, and they walked hurriedly down the hall to Transfiguration, laughing, as all teenagers seem to start doing automatically when a class ends.

…………………………………………

It was supper once more, but Harry’s palms were so sweaty that he continuously dropped his fork.

“Harry, are you alright?” Hermoine inquired, “You’re acting strangely again.”

Harry sighed. “Sorry. I’m just thinking about how I’m taking extra potions again.” His ear perked to hear their response, eager to make sure he had sounded believable.

“Technically you weren’t taking extra potions last time,” Hermoine stated.

Harry chuckled. “That’s true!”

“Tough luck with it now, though, mate,” Ron pat him on the back. “Have fun spending all that time with Snape.”

‘Oh, I will’, Harry thought. He jumped. Where had that come from! Harry grimaced, embarrassed by his own thoughts. “Yeah…” he muttered.

They ate silently for the rest of supper, Harry deep into his own nervous state. What was going to happen? Would Severus just get uncomfortable and tell him to leave? Harry looked over at the man in question. He was finishing his last sip of pumpkin juice just as Harry turned. Severus swallowed, paused, and glanced over at Harry before standing to take his leave out of the Great Hall.

“You know,” Harry said suddenly, “I think I better get going to the dungeons. Snape’ll kill me if I’m late.”

“Yeah,” Ron agreed, “You don’t need to get a detention with him on top of two classes.”

Hermoine nodded. “Good luck Harry. Try to keep your cool.”

“See you later!” Harry waved and left the hall, wringing his hands as soon as he was out of their sight. He slowed his pace and crept toward the dungeons, almost as if he were not invited to his destination. He almost wasn’t, really. He had practically invited himself!

He was in the dungeon corridors now. Maybe he should turn back. Maybe Severus didn’t want him there. He might be intruding. Severus could have just said yes out of obligation to their deal. No… Severus wouldn’t do anything out of obligation, except his teaching career.

Harry had made himself so nervous that by the time he reached Severus’s quarters he couldn’t even grasp the doorknob. Finally, he got a firm grip on it and entered to find a very confused looking Professor standing across the classroom holding a book.

“What the bloody hell were you doing over there, making all that racket?” Snape asked, sitting the book neatly on a shelf. “Trying to rip off my doorknob?”

Harry shook his head sheepishly. “Sorry…”

Severus turned away with a slight shrug and began to stack more books onto the shelves. There were so many of them! They must have been books from all his separate potions classes. Harry stood there without a purpose, gazing distractedly around the room.

“Would you mind helping me shelve these books?” Severus asked suddenly, no looking at Harry as he continued to stack seventh year potions.

Harry nodded, but when he realized Severus couldn’t see him he spoke. “Yeah, sure.” He walked over to the bookshelves and picked a three books of potion ingredient dictionaries and turned to Severus. “Where do you want these?” he questioned, gesturing to the books in his hands.

Severus pointed to the left at a barren place on the third shelf. “There would do nicely.”

Harry scooted over to the area. It was a cramped place at the middle and right of the shelves, any escape blocked off by a table and precariously stacked books that were a mere foot or two away from the shelves where they stacked them. Harry found it difficult to move in the area without dropping books.

Soon enough, he and Severus had a steady rhythm; Harry staying to the left, and Severus to the right. They hadn’t spoken for the half an hour they had been shelving and excepting a few sideways glances at each other, they had made no attempt to, perfectly content in their work.

Harry stood at the middle of the confines between table and shelf now, reaching up to stick another fourth year potions book on the top shelf. He started when he felt a tap on his shoulder.

“I need to get by,” Severus spoke, nodding towards the space to the left of Harry.

Harry blushed, realizing he was in the man’s way. “Oh, ok,” he mumbled, and he moved forward to let Severus pass behind him, not thinking of just getting out of the small area to let him pass.

Severus moved to shift behind Harry, unconsciously laying a hand on the young wizard’s hip as he did so. As Severus began to slip by, Harry felt the Potion Master’s body press fully against his own in the tight confines of the space. They both froze at the intimate position. Harry couldn’t help but shiver as a chill went up his spine. Severus felt the shiver and his eyes widened, his heart pounding a mile a minute and his mind not computing the current situation. Severus leaned forward ever so slightly, breathing in the scent of Harry’s hair slowly. Harry closed his eyes when Severus did this. Then, the Professor remembered himself and slid past, letting his fingers drag lazily across the small of Harry’s back as he did so.

This all took place in under five seconds.

But even though it happened so quickly, it left Harry breathing shallow, erratic breaths and his forehead was sweating torrents.

What the hell was that!

……………………………………………..

Harry and Severus had finished their book stacking and had moved to Severus’s private quarters to sit in front of the fire. Neither of them had spoken of the moment when they had touched, but as they sat staring at the crackling flames, they both realized that it had actually been the first time, in all the years they had known each other, that they had touched for such an extended period of time, even if it was just a few seconds.

Harry yawned suddenly, stretching his arms out sedately.

“Tired already, Potter?” Severus mused.

“No I just…” Harry yawned again in irony, “I don’t get much sleep lately.”

“Why is that?” Severus asked, sounding interested.

Harry frowned, unsure of what Severus would think if he told him of his visions.

“The whole point of you being here is so we talk, Harry,” Severus spoke, his voice gravely.

“I have visions,” Harry replied, “Of Voldemort.” Severus frowned. “Sorry, I’ll call him Tom.”

“No, it’s fine,” Severus said, “Fear of a name is ridiculous.”

“Ok,” Harry nodded, remembering the time when Hermoine had said something quite similar. “Anyway, I have visions of him; of him torturing people or speaking to his followers. The dreams often give me pain.” Harry sighed.

Severus thought for a moment, is eyebrows suddenly raising the way they did when he had an idea. “Would you like a dreamless sleep potion?” he suggested, turning to look at the younger man.

Harry smiled. “That would be nice. I bet that might work. I never actually thought of that before.”

“Of course you didn’t,” Severus replied, “You’ve never been all that accomplished at potions.”

Harry made a pouty face at the wall and crossed his arms defiantly.

Severus stood and walked over to a cabinet lining the wall. He grabbed a vial from it and hands it to Harry, their fingers brushing slightly, making them both look away.

“Drink it right before you go to bed,” Severus said, returning to his seat on the couch. “It should make it so you don’t have those dreams.”
”Thank you,” Harry muttered as he rose from his chair, “I hope it works. I should get going. I’ve already been here for an hour and a half.” He paused, thinking silently o himself. “I can come back tomorrow right?” he asked, not turning around.

There was a moment of silence before he heard the reply. “Yes.”

“Goodnight, then,” Harry nodded to Severus who nodded in return.

With that, Harry left, closing the door of the classroom softly on his way out.

Severus groaned, leaning forward and rubbing his temples furiously. “What am I getting myself into?” he grumbled angrily.

………………………………………………..

Harry sat on his four poster bed with the vial set firmly between his fingers. He studied the slightly glowing liquid for a moment. It was a light blueish purple. At leas tit wasn’t black or some other unappetizing color.

Harry was tired of his nightly terrors and so were his roommates. He woke of every night screaming. Even if he put a silencing charm around his bed his roommates could still see him thrashing around.

He pulled the sheets around his bed for privacy and crossed his fingers. Tipping the vial to his lips he closed his eyes and gulped down the contents.

Bottoms up.

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Fjdsfkdsjfndskjfndsk. That’s all I have to say about that. There’s chapter four for you all! Hope you liked it! I’m actually introducing sexual tension! OMG!