Slipping Through

*

"Why do I have to be the bottom in this 'relationship'?"

"Please, Potter, do I look like a bottom to you?"

Harry scowled deeply as he watched Draco turn around from the window and lean casually against the ledge. They were back in the same room from the night of the party. Outside, the early summer sun filtered in through the dark curtains that were drawn back. Draco stood with his back to the window, leaning against the ledge, one leg casually resting on the wall behind him.

"Well, you are more feminine than I am," Harry replied.

"I resent that," Draco said, scowling. "Simply because I actually have a fashion sense does not make me more feminine."

He gave a very obvious rake of Harry's body, his eyes lingering over the ripped jeans.

Harry rolled his eyes and moved closer to Draco. "At least I'm not obsessed with my hair," he said, reaching out to ruffle Draco's hair, but Draco immediately stepped out of reach.

"Don't touch," he warned. "Besides, Potter, once this is over, you can go back to having whatever reputation you want."

"Oh yeah," Harry said sarcastically. "Because I've always gotten to choose my image."

Draco chose to ignore that comment, walking around Harry and sitting down on the couch behind him.

Harry turned as he went, watching him sit down. "And how long do we have to keep this up exactly? My whole House thinks I've gone mad."

"Really? I'm a hero," Draco drawled. "Apparently shagging The-Boy-Who-Lived is something of an accomplishment."

"Of course it would be," Harry muttered darkly. "Is that all I am, Malfoy? Another notch in your belt?"

"What are you upset about?" Draco asked facetiously. "We're not even sleeping together. None of this is real."

"I know," Harry replied resentfully. "I just don't like knowing that all these people think I've sold my soul to the devil by 'sleeping' with you."

"But the devil gives the best rewards," Draco said with a knowing smirk.

"Only you would know," Harry said, rolling his eyes and scowling. He got tired of standing and sat down on the other side of the couch, furthest away from Draco.

He didn't know why he had agreed to start this ridiculous rumor, but it certainly had created a buzz. His announcement in the common room the night before had spread through the school like wildfire. He couldn't turn a corner without someone whispering furtively to their neighbor and pointing openly at him. He was desperately trying to remember why he'd wanted to do this. What would it accomplish? He supposed that after a few days it would die down.

"When can we stop this?" he asked. "People are going to think I'm crazier than they already do."

"That’s not much, Potter," Draco drawled.

"Tell me how this changes anything?" Harry asked, trying to ignore Draco's jibe.

"If they think we did it already, they'll stop pushing," Draco explained. "I won't have to listen to how cute of a couple we would be!" he finished sarcastically. He shook his head and scowled as he looked out the window once more. A few birds swooped past the open window, twittering incessantly.

"Why are people so obsessed with us anyway?" Harry asked, sighing as he watched the birds flutter past. "I mean, we were enemies for years, and we still don't get along! Do they think they're doing us a favor by forcing us together? Don't they realize this can only end badly?"

"People aren't as smart as you give them credit for, Potter," Draco drawled, looking over at him. "They don't care about consequences. They only care about immediate results."

"You should have more faith in people," Harry told him, frowning slightly at his cynicism.

"Yeah?" Draco asked sarcastically, raising an eyebrow. "Because they have so much faith in me."

"Maybe if you gave them reason to trust you, they might," Harry said as though it was obvious.

Draco's look was one of masked incredulity, turning his body to face him. "Why should I trust them? So they can save me when there's no one else left? I've got news for you, Potter, people don't stick around. People you thought cared for you won't save you in the end. In the end, we're all alone."

"You really believe that?" Harry asked, looking at him closely. He'd never heard Draco talk about what had happened during the war. Harry had just assumed that he'd been hidden away by his parents. Harry knew he had been a Death Eater but had been cleared under some questionable circumstances.

"I believe what I know, Potter, and I know that in the end, there's no escape." He turned from Harry to stare out the window once more. Harry stared at him for several moments, wondering what exactly had happened to make him this way.

"Malfoy?" he asked after a few moments of quiet. Draco turned to look at him, his face blank, his mask firmly in place. "What happened during the war?"

A flicker of some emotion crossed Draco's face for a mere second before disappearing behind the mask. Draco looked back out the window.

"Nothing."

"It can't have been nothing," Harry said. "Tell me what happened."

"I'm not going to tell you, of all people, Potter," Draco replied scathingly, not looking at him.

"Why not? Don't you think I'd understand?" Harry asked. He didn't know why he was so interested to know but something just made him ask. He realized that the reason he'd come to meet Malfoy, to discuss their rumor, was long over. He should have left long ago but he hadn't. He had stayed and was now trying to get his nemesis to divulge a personal secret to him.

"You probably would, Potter," Draco replied, giving a small laugh, but it was a cold laugh. "But no one can know."

"Why not?" Harry pressed. He just wanted to know why Draco had so little faith in people.

"Listen, Potter," Draco said coldly, looking at him once again. "You don't like the quiet, do you?"

"No," Harry said slowly, wondering what that meant. He'd told Draco to never ask him that again but somehow the circumstances had changed.

"And you don't talk about it, do you?"

"No," Harry said again.

"So there are some things that people just don't discuss," Draco finished coldly. He held Harry's gaze for a few seconds before looking away, his expression dark once more.

Harry sat on the couch for a moment, trying to work out what could have been so bad that Draco wouldn't talk about it. But then again, he wasn't exactly his closest confidant. He wondered if Blaise knew.

When Draco showed no more signs of wanting to talk with Harry, Harry stood up from the couch, realizing there was nothing more he could do. He was stuck with this rumor they had started and he would hope that this would blow over soon. He didn't know why he had agreed, but it had seemed a good idea at the time. Then again, they had both been slightly drunk from the alcohol.

Harry walked over to the door without a word and pushed it open. Before he left the room, he cast one more glance over to where Draco sat on the couch, still staring out the window. He shook his head and left the room, the door swinging shut behind him.

He trudged up the dark corridors through the dungeons until he reached the bright Entrance Hall. He looked in the direction of the Great Hall where people were having lunch. He decided he'd rather not go where tons of people would be craning their necks to get a look at him and speculate on where he'd been. They had probably already come up with many theories. In the end, Harry chose to retreat to the Gryffindor common room and do some much needed studying for his N.E.W.Ts.

He gathered a few books from his dormitory and dragged them downstairs, spreading them over one of the low tables. He sat down in a comfortable armchair and began to read up on tropical plants used in potion making. He had been reading less than ten minutes when the portrait hole opened, and Hermione and Ron clambered through.

Harry sighed but didn't set down his book, knowing he was in for a grilling on where he'd gone. He heard them sit down on either side of him and, thankfully, didn't say anything for once. Harry sat with his nose in the book, trying to read up on why palm tree leaves were so important in Sleeping Draughts.

After a while, though, he began to wonder why Ron and Hermione hadn't said anything yet. He lowered the book carefully to look over the top at them suspiciously. Ron was sitting low in the chair, his eyes half-closed. He finally seemed to be coming to himself after the last few days. Harry then looked over at Hermione who was staring at him intently. He groaned and set down the book, knowing she had been waiting for him.

"Harry," she said, her eyes glittering. "You never told me, what exactly happened with Malfoy?"

"I already told you," Harry sighed. "I don't really remember. We had a lot to drink, if you recall. I just know we went to some room and then we kissed and I can't really remember much after that. I know the next morning he was there and so was I."

Harry wondered for a second if she could see through his lies. They had done nothing of the sort. They had simply discussed what they wanted to do to get back at those people who had been so eager to see them together, then taken their leave and gone to their respective dormitories. But Hermione didn't need to know that.

"But you must remember something?" she pushed, trying to get some kind of information out of him.

"Why are you so interested, Hermione?" Harry asked, tired of her constant pushing. Normally she was only this pushy with things like S.P.E.W.

"You can't blame a girl for asking," she said, sniffing. "I was just curious is all."

Harry looked at her closely and she turned away but not before a slight blush appeared on her cheeks. Over in his armchair, Ron was noticing nothing of the goings on between his best friends.

"Do you know something I don't?" he asked shrewdly.

Hermione tutted and turned to him. "Of course not! I wouldn't hide things from you."

"Really?" Harry asked skeptically. "So you didn't have some ulterior motive for getting me to that ridiculous party the other night?"

"Well, I-- I mean, no! Of course not!" she said firmly.

Harry turned to her and fixed her with an intent stare, his emerald green eyes trying to find out what she really knew. He looked steadily back for several moments until she faltered.

"Oh, fine!" she said, throwing her hands up in defeat. "Blaise and I thought it would be a good idea for you and Malfoy to... you know."

"You planned this?!" Harry exclaimed.

"Not planned, but we tried to make sure it was you and Malfoy left at the end."

"Well, gee, thanks," Harry said sarcastically.

"But it worked didn't it? How do you feel about Malfoy?"

Harry didn't reply for a moment. She thought they had already slept together. What was he supposed to be feeling? At the moment, he didn't feel much for Malfoy; no feelings of hate or even dislike. It was like he had no feelings for him. His previous feelings had somehow dissolved in the past couple days since this had started.

He still didn't know what Draco wasn't telling him about what had gone on in the war, but just the fact that he hadn't had an easy time of it made Harry feel a bit more sympathetic towards him than he had previously. He was feeling oddly curious to know what he was hiding or not telling him.

He knew he shouldn't push it though. Through this whole party fiasco, they had formed some form of odd truce. Whenever they met to discuss what was going on, Draco no longer attacked him verbally. They actually seemed to get along, oddly enough.

Harry turned back to Hermione, who was waiting for his answer. "Uh, no different," he lied, shrugging.

Hermione sighed as though disappointed. "The sex wasn't even good?"

Harry stared at her for a second then glanced over at Ron. He didn't appear to be listening. He was gazing the other way, looking out the window where a yellow butterfly was perched on the window ledge.

"Ron?" Harry asked. "How are you okay with this?"

"Huh?" he asked, looking round at Harry. "You and who?"

"Malfoy," Harry said, looking at him closely.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Ron said vaguely.

Harry turned to Hermione. "You didn't have anything to do with that, did you?" he asked, jerking his head toward Ron who was now sighing wistfully, his eyes unfocused as he watched the butterfly once more.

"No," she said simply. "I don't know what's wrong with him."

Harry watched Ron for a few moments before shrugging and letting it go for the time-being. He turned back to Hermione, who, unfortunately, hadn't forgotten her original purpose.

"So how was it?" she asked again.

"Fine, Hermione, it was fine," Harry sighed.

"Just fine?" she asked. "Harry, this was Draco Malfoy."

"I know who it was," Harry replied scathingly.

She just huffed and continued. "So he's the Slytherin Sex God. Everyone wants to sleep with him. And you actually got that chance, and you're telling me that it was just fine?"

"Yes, okay!" he exclaimed, sick of her pushing. He couldn't tell her that they hadn't actually done it.

I thought this rumor was supposed to get people off our backs, Harry thought mulishly. It seemed to be having the opposite effect on Hermione. Then again, he hadn't counted on her being so interested in what he did with Malfoy. Most people would simply accept it and move on; say something like, "That Harry Potter is at it again" and leave him alone. Unfortunately for him, Hermione was not to be deterred on a mission.

"Are you going to see him again?" Hermione asked interestedly.

"I don't know, Hermione. Probably not," he said exasperatedly.

"Oh, but why not? Everyone thinks you'd be the perfect couple."

"Except for the fact that we hate each other!" Harry said, realizing it was a lie before he even finished the sentence. That was no longer true. Really, it hadn't been true since the beginning of the year, they'd just never noticed.

They had hardly spoken to each other, Harry now realized. Draco had mostly kept to himself besides screwing everything that moved. Other than that, he didn't talk to anyone, speak up in class, taunt Harry, nothing. Harry hadn't really thought about it until now.

"That's a minor detail," Hermione said dismissively, and Harry stared at her.

"Minor detail? That would probably ruin the whole thing!"

"Feelings can be changed," she said, waving away his statement.

"Hermione," Harry said desperately. "Why are you so set on this?"

"Because I want you to be happy!" she exclaimed, turning to him and giving him pleading look. "I want you to find someone! I know that since the war you haven't been with anyone. I know you're afraid of being alone. I know you care. I know you need someone, Harry. Just let me find that someone for you."

Harry was momentarily speechless as Hermione finished her spiel. He had no idea she actually had a good reason behind her scheme. He had just assumed she wanted to see him and Draco together.

"But why Draco Malfoy?" he finally asked.

She sighed. "Harry, you probably don't realize how much you have in common. You both went through the war, suffered horrors the other can't imagine. You've experienced loss; you know what it feels like. And god, Harry, you used to fight all the time; that only means two things. Either you truly hate him, or you subconsciously love him."

"Love him?!" Harry exclaimed. "I don't even know him!"

"I didn't say you did, I meant there was a very real possibility. And besides, it takes time to love someone."

"And how do you know I don't really hate him?"

"Because, Harry, have you fought at all in the last year?"

"No..."

"What have you done instead?"

"I don't know..."

"You've been moping."

"I have not!"

"You have, and that's why."

Harry scowled. He hadn't thought that he'd been depressed because of it. He had just thought it was because now that the war was actually over, he had the chance for a normal life. He'd just supposed that it was part of a normal life. He hadn't realized how much Draco's taunting had affected him.

He looked over at Hermione who was giving him a sympathetic smile and scowled at her. Why did she have to be so smart? Why couldn't he have more friends like Ron? He glanced over at Ron who had a dreamy expression on his face and was gazing out the window, completely oblivious to any of their conversations. He rolled his eyes and turned back to Hermione.

"So your suggestion to cheer me up was to make me sleep with Malfoy?" he asked skeptically.

"Well, no," she said. "I was hoping you would see what everyone else has."

"Everyone else?" Harry asked.

"Not everyone," she amended. "But all those who care to notice. It was Michael, actually, who noticed it first."

"Michael?" Harry repeated. "Damn that Ravenclaw. I never should have dated him..."

Hermione laughed lightly at him. "It's not entirely his fault. Blaise and I helped."

"Of course," Harry muttered. "And why are you all so set on controlling my life?"

"It's not just your life, you realize. Draco is a part of this too."

"So you wanted us both to suffer at your hands?"

"No, Harry," Hermione sighed exasperatedly. "We want you to be happy."

"I don't know how that's possible with so many people meddling in our lives!" Harry exclaimed.

Hermione sighed again and grabbed Harry's shoulders, forcing him to look at her. "Listen to me, Harry. I have your best interests at heart. Blaise has Draco's. We're just trying to make your lives a little happier is all."

"And by happier, you mean all messed up?" Harry asked sarcastically, completely forgetting that this was all a lie in the first place. Hermione had no idea that he and Draco had not had sex at all. But Harry, wrapped up in the moment, forgot that fact.

"No, Harry!" Hermione cried in exasperation. "We just wanted you to relax a little, have some fun, find someone you can really connect with."

"Connect with?" Harry asked rhetorically. "You think I can connect with Draco Malfoy?" Hermione opened her mouth to respond but he cut her off. "I-- I don't want to hear it, Hermione. I know you think you're doing the best for me, but I don't see where you got this idea. I am never sleeping with Draco Malfoy again!"

He stood up abruptly from the armchair and strode over to the portrait hole, Hermione watching him hopelessly. He stalked out the door, ignoring the reprimand from the Fat Lady for slamming the door shut.

He stomped down the corridor, muttering darkly to himself about meddling friends. He didn't need more people interfering in his life. It had been bad enough during the war, but now to have it happening afterwards was just too much!

Without noticing where he'd been going, Harry found himself in the dungeon corridors. He made purposefully for the room at the end of the corridor. He slammed open the door and strode into the room.

His eyes traveled around the room, landing on Draco who was sitting on the couch, panting harshly. Harry looked down to see Terry Boot on his knees in front of Draco.

"We need to talk," Harry said suddenly, effectively startling both boys.


~**~~

A/N: I'm SO sorry! I totally skipped this chapter here *facepalm* Gah. I'm sorry, really.