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Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
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Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
4
Views:
2,155
Reviews:
19
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
It Covers My Eyes...
Chapter 4: It covers my eyes…
----------
“Harry?”
“Hmm?”
I’ve recently found that one of the most annoying things a person can do while lying in bed with you is talking. I would rather Draco be doing something else, instead of just lying his head on my chest, but it’s almost curfew. We opted not to go to dinner, both of us eating our fair share of snacks on the train and neither of us wanting more ridicule once the word spread. Tomorrow. Tomorrow we can deal with anything.
I look at Draco and continue to stroke his hair. It is rather nice just to hold him, just to hold anyone this close. I don’t think anyone has ever been this close to me before.
“On the train…” Draco looks hesitant, but I want him to be able to ask me anything.
“Come on, what is it?”
“Why did you come over and comfort me?”
“Because someone needed to.”
“Okay. But we fought for 5 years. It just…doesn’t make sense that you would so willingly help me.”
“I guess not. It’s just…that look on your face. I know that look, Draco. Needing someone to be there, and no one there. And it’s awful. I didn’t want anyone to go through that.”
“Why do you know that look, Harry?” He says it very quietly. I look away from him. I can barely stand to have him so close now, close enough that he can see inside my mind. See everything that I wanted to keep from everyone. I want to jump up, move across the room, run away out the door, straight to the Forbidden Forest and out, anywhere. Anywhere where I can be alone and no one is going to ask me these questions to make me relive these memories and have everyone haunt me till the day I die.
“Harry?”
I get up and sit on the edge of the bed, trying to curl the edges of my body into myself, become invisible without my cloak.
“Draco, there are two ways you can see the world. You either see the sadness behind everything or you can choose to keep it out. I’m just choosing to keep it out.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
“I know. But you making me tell you that will let it in.”
“Why won’t you let it in?”
“Because…sometimes I let it in, and it covers my eyes. It’s all I can see. Say there’s some kids playing Quidditch. All I see is Neville, or some other one kid, that they won’t let play because he makes mistakes in Potions and tells corny jokes, and no one thinks they’re funny. Or I see a boy and a girl, in love and kissing, you know? I just see that they’re going to be one of those sad old couples on day, who just cheat on each other and can’t even look at each other in the eye. And I feel it. I feel all of their sadness. I feel it probably worse than that sad old couple or that corny kid will ever feel it.” And I start to cry. I don’t mean to. I don’t want to. I try to hold it back until the tears burn so bad behind my eyes I feel like I’m going blind. But they all just keep coming, and suddenly I feel like I am drowning in it all. In everything I’ve lived through. Everything I’ve seen. And for one second, before Draco wraps his arm around me, I just want it all to end.
“Shh. Harry, it’s okay, love. It’s okay.”
I just put my head on his shoulder, right above his heart. And as my body wracks with sobs, I can feel his heartbeat, like it’s mine.
“Harry, what happened?”
“Everything, Draco. Everything happened.” I sit up and look at him again, wiping my eyes on my sleeve. “My whole life…I never had anything. I was left with my Aunt and Uncle, my only living relatives, and I didn’t even know about Sirius cause he was in Azkaban, you know. And they just…they hated me. Since I was a kid, I lived in the cupboard under the stairs. I was barely fed. I was beaten up constantly by my cousin Dudley and his friends. My Uncle and Aunt didn’t care at all. And my aunt, she’s my Mum’s sister! She’s her bloody sister and she still didn’t do anything! And I thought that Dudley was the worst, you know? When I couldn’t get away, which I usually could, but I thought he and his friends beating me to a bloody pulp was the worst pain I was ever going to feel. Physical pain, that is, you know. But once I started coming to Hogwarts, after Hagrid came and got me, and told me about my parents and how they died and what I am, my Uncle hated me more than ever. He started to…he started to beat me. All the time, sometimes for days he would keep beating me. When he needed a break to go do something, he’d lock me in my room without food. A glass of water. That’s it. And Hogwarts was the only place I had, you know? And then I didn’t have that. Because no matter what, I couldn’t tell anyone. I couldn’t let it out. If I told someone, it would make it real. And I didn’t want it to be real. And Hermione and Ron kept pestering me. And Hermione kept following me around, and chatting about me with Ginny. And Dumbledore kept telling me nothing. And then with Cedric and Voldemort and…and Sirius. It’s all just too--” tears are rolling down my face and I feel more coming on. I break down again, falling against Draco and grasping onto his shirt with dear life. Because I know, he’s the only one who can keep me here.
----------
“I think there are two ways you can see the world. You either see the sadness that\'s behind everything or you choose to keep it all out.”
“It covers my eyes. It\'s all I can see. Say there\'s some kids playing baseball. All I see is the one kid they won\'t let play because he tells corny jokes. And no-one thinks they\'re funny. Or I see a boy and a girl in love and kissing, you know. I just see that they\'re gonna be one of those sad old couples one day who just cheats on each other and can\'t even look at each other in the eye. And I feel it. I feel all of their sadness. I feel it probably even worse than that sad old couple or that corny kid will ever feel it.” both from United States of Leland (great movie). Just changed some of it with creative license to make it fit the story.
Sorry for the shortness. I just got random inspiration for this chapter.
----------
“Harry?”
“Hmm?”
I’ve recently found that one of the most annoying things a person can do while lying in bed with you is talking. I would rather Draco be doing something else, instead of just lying his head on my chest, but it’s almost curfew. We opted not to go to dinner, both of us eating our fair share of snacks on the train and neither of us wanting more ridicule once the word spread. Tomorrow. Tomorrow we can deal with anything.
I look at Draco and continue to stroke his hair. It is rather nice just to hold him, just to hold anyone this close. I don’t think anyone has ever been this close to me before.
“On the train…” Draco looks hesitant, but I want him to be able to ask me anything.
“Come on, what is it?”
“Why did you come over and comfort me?”
“Because someone needed to.”
“Okay. But we fought for 5 years. It just…doesn’t make sense that you would so willingly help me.”
“I guess not. It’s just…that look on your face. I know that look, Draco. Needing someone to be there, and no one there. And it’s awful. I didn’t want anyone to go through that.”
“Why do you know that look, Harry?” He says it very quietly. I look away from him. I can barely stand to have him so close now, close enough that he can see inside my mind. See everything that I wanted to keep from everyone. I want to jump up, move across the room, run away out the door, straight to the Forbidden Forest and out, anywhere. Anywhere where I can be alone and no one is going to ask me these questions to make me relive these memories and have everyone haunt me till the day I die.
“Harry?”
I get up and sit on the edge of the bed, trying to curl the edges of my body into myself, become invisible without my cloak.
“Draco, there are two ways you can see the world. You either see the sadness behind everything or you can choose to keep it out. I’m just choosing to keep it out.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
“I know. But you making me tell you that will let it in.”
“Why won’t you let it in?”
“Because…sometimes I let it in, and it covers my eyes. It’s all I can see. Say there’s some kids playing Quidditch. All I see is Neville, or some other one kid, that they won’t let play because he makes mistakes in Potions and tells corny jokes, and no one thinks they’re funny. Or I see a boy and a girl, in love and kissing, you know? I just see that they’re going to be one of those sad old couples on day, who just cheat on each other and can’t even look at each other in the eye. And I feel it. I feel all of their sadness. I feel it probably worse than that sad old couple or that corny kid will ever feel it.” And I start to cry. I don’t mean to. I don’t want to. I try to hold it back until the tears burn so bad behind my eyes I feel like I’m going blind. But they all just keep coming, and suddenly I feel like I am drowning in it all. In everything I’ve lived through. Everything I’ve seen. And for one second, before Draco wraps his arm around me, I just want it all to end.
“Shh. Harry, it’s okay, love. It’s okay.”
I just put my head on his shoulder, right above his heart. And as my body wracks with sobs, I can feel his heartbeat, like it’s mine.
“Harry, what happened?”
“Everything, Draco. Everything happened.” I sit up and look at him again, wiping my eyes on my sleeve. “My whole life…I never had anything. I was left with my Aunt and Uncle, my only living relatives, and I didn’t even know about Sirius cause he was in Azkaban, you know. And they just…they hated me. Since I was a kid, I lived in the cupboard under the stairs. I was barely fed. I was beaten up constantly by my cousin Dudley and his friends. My Uncle and Aunt didn’t care at all. And my aunt, she’s my Mum’s sister! She’s her bloody sister and she still didn’t do anything! And I thought that Dudley was the worst, you know? When I couldn’t get away, which I usually could, but I thought he and his friends beating me to a bloody pulp was the worst pain I was ever going to feel. Physical pain, that is, you know. But once I started coming to Hogwarts, after Hagrid came and got me, and told me about my parents and how they died and what I am, my Uncle hated me more than ever. He started to…he started to beat me. All the time, sometimes for days he would keep beating me. When he needed a break to go do something, he’d lock me in my room without food. A glass of water. That’s it. And Hogwarts was the only place I had, you know? And then I didn’t have that. Because no matter what, I couldn’t tell anyone. I couldn’t let it out. If I told someone, it would make it real. And I didn’t want it to be real. And Hermione and Ron kept pestering me. And Hermione kept following me around, and chatting about me with Ginny. And Dumbledore kept telling me nothing. And then with Cedric and Voldemort and…and Sirius. It’s all just too--” tears are rolling down my face and I feel more coming on. I break down again, falling against Draco and grasping onto his shirt with dear life. Because I know, he’s the only one who can keep me here.
----------
“I think there are two ways you can see the world. You either see the sadness that\'s behind everything or you choose to keep it all out.”
“It covers my eyes. It\'s all I can see. Say there\'s some kids playing baseball. All I see is the one kid they won\'t let play because he tells corny jokes. And no-one thinks they\'re funny. Or I see a boy and a girl in love and kissing, you know. I just see that they\'re gonna be one of those sad old couples one day who just cheats on each other and can\'t even look at each other in the eye. And I feel it. I feel all of their sadness. I feel it probably even worse than that sad old couple or that corny kid will ever feel it.” both from United States of Leland (great movie). Just changed some of it with creative license to make it fit the story.
Sorry for the shortness. I just got random inspiration for this chapter.