Will You Help Me Find Myself

‘Will You Help Me Find Myself ? ’


Chapter Four: A Cut Too Deep.


Hermione stared down at her arm. A long red line now ran down it’s perfect length. Another good result in a test, essay and an experiment. Two mores ans and her work would be done. She had adapted this new method of coping. The cutting helped with the worthlessness she felt. Another good grade meant another time she was seen as a know it all instead of a person, another time she was seen as book head instead of a young woman. One more just to get rid of the self disgust she felt. With silencing spell cast on her room Hermione could scream as loud as she wanted. The razor blade made short work of cutting the skin and into the tissue below. Blood welled up in the thin slice. Hermione looked down at the cut and gave herself a little smile. It was amazing to think that she felt so much better because of this action. Getting her bandages out from her desk draw she slowly wrapped her arm. Covering it with the sleeve of her jumper Hermione checked the time. She had five minutes to get to Lucius’ office in time for their meeting.

Making her way down the stairs to the defence against the dark arts classroom Hermione stopped and quickly checked her arm. She was feeling a little dizzy. This often occurred after a cutting session. The blood had begun to seep through the bandages. A little more then normal, but Hermione believed that this was nothing to worry about. In a little while it would stop. It always did.

Reaching the entrance to the defence against the dark art classroom Hermione checked her appearance by straightening her robes and casting a hand over her hair. Before her hand could meet the wood of the door a voice boomed through it.

‘You may enter Miss. Granger.’

This unsettled Hermione he should not have known that she was there. But then again Snape had a way of doing that. Of knowing exactly when someone was right outside his classroom. What had she expected from someone linked wihe Dhe Dark Lord. Flowers and bunny rabbits. Opening the door she found the room dark and miserable. It suited her mood at the moment. She felt like this room in so many ways. Maybe it was the only other occupant that was making her feel so familiar with the dark and pain that seemed to emanate from the room.

‘You wished to see me?’

Was that her voice? She had known that recently she had become more docile but his didn’t sound like her. Weak and most of all scared. Hermione peered into the dark. She could just make out the shape of a man in the corner of the room. He was hovering over something.

‘Come in and close the door Miss. Granger. I won’t hurt you here. What would be the point?’

‘Would you mind telling me why im here. If you needed information about how Hogwarts is run then you could have asked Draco. He is your son after all.’

‘Yes I could have asked him but then again He isn’t as good looking as you Miss. Granger! Now would you like to take a seat you look a little pale. I noticed that you didn’t eat anything at dinner.’

‘So nice that you are concern about me but could we please get this over with I have much better things to be doing with my time them standing around in this dark room with a man I aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh………….’

Lucius had strode forward and grasped her by her arm near her wrist.

‘What did you say? Do you not know who I am?’

Hermione tried to concentrate on what was being sbut but Lucius had a death grip on her arm right on the cuts she had made just minutes earlier. The blood had begun to seep through the bandages and she could feel it running down her arm. Tear prickled in her eyes. Lucius was staring at her. He must have been able to feel the hot liquid against his fingers because he let go of her arm and ripped her jumper sleeve up her arm.

‘What happened here? Why are you bleeding? Miss. Granger, answer me!’

Hermione would have answered if the room had not been spinning the was it was. Trying her hardest she tried to concentrate on the face in front of her. Trying to pin point exactly what the voice was saying but blackness was creeping into her mind. The hand that was once gripping her arm now went around her as the room finally spilled away into nothingness.

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A/N

Thank you very much to the people that have review my fic.
It’s weird I actually dreamt most of this fiction once night and wrote it down. Now little bits keeping coming to me.