Snapey Went A Courting

Snapey Went A Courting

It all belongs to Rowling, except what you don’t recognize.

Chapter Four – Ooh Baby Love, I Need You, Oh How I Need You


Hermione’s laughter was cut short by the sharp pain from pulling stitches. Snape strode into the room, and quickly picked up the squalling infant. Hermione tensed even as the babe stopped crying. She felt a mild dread come over her that her child could be so quickly comforted by someone she’d planned to be a total stranger to him.

“Professor Snape?” she addressed him but he didn’t seem to notice her. To her horror, it was as if a mask had slipped from him and even his clownish attire couldn’t belie the sentimental-- nay soppy even-- look revealed on his visage. She’d known him for years, first as her professor and then as a fellow Order member and, finally, as a drunken accidental sperm donor. She’d seen him angry and triumphantly mean; she’d seen many sides of him, none of them likeable. So where was this new Snape coming from? His face, normally so harsh and tense, had become gentle and, no, but she would swear she saw his eyes glisten with unshed tears. He was holding her child, she refused to think of Waldo as theirs, and a naked, open longing and vulnerability showed on his face, an expression which she would have sworn a few minutes ago he was incapable of. Her breath caught as she realized that it was going to be next to impossible to get rid of this suddenly oh-so-human Snape who had replaced the caricature of old.

Snape for his part was caught up in a passion that he never knew he was capable of either. From the second he’d laid eyes on Saccius he lost all thought of strategy or elegant plans of winning Hermione. All speeches fled him. Saccius was more than he ever thought possible a mere child could be. In an instant Snape realized that he would give his life for this tiny creature and that he’d never be able to discipline him. He could be clumsier than Longbottom or more doltish than Potter, but he’d never strike this child or hurt him verbally—such things were no longer in his repertoire, not with this child, the fruit of his loins. He now knew why Draco’s family had spoiled the boy rotten. He understood it completely. He wanted to do the same. Reverently, he leaned his mouth down and kissed the boy on his tiny forehead. He whispered the name, “Saccius”. The infant quietly observed him, smacked his lips and fell back asleep.

It’s not fair, thought Hermione in a panic. It just isn’t. Her mind refused to comment any further. Instead, “Hand him to me. Please, Professor.”

Snape slowly looked from the baby to his mother. His eyes went to where blood was beginning to seep through the sheet covering her and the mask returned to his face. “Hermione, you are bleeding!”

“It’s Ms. Granger to you. Give me my son, Waldo.” She put out her arms to take him.

“What did those Muggles do to you?” he hissed. Most annoyingly, he held the babe even closer to him.

“Caesarean section, not that it’s any of your concern. My baby, please?” Her voice was starting to take on an edge of hysteria. She started blinking away tears. Gods, those stitches were stinging.

“You’re in pain. We are going to St. Mungo’s—you and Saccius need proper medical care.” The old Snape returned in full force. She was suddenly eleven years old again and about to get detention. It was all there in his voice.

“I’ll do nothing of the sort and his name is Waldo!” The one nerve Hermione had left was peeling, straining and about to snap.

“What did they do to you? Cut you open? Stupid girl, no arguments now, you are both going.” He voice was low and in control. Snape would not have his authority questioned, especially not where the health and welng ong of “his family” were concerned.

Hermione began to gulp air and tried to scoot her body over to her child. She put her hand over the incisions and came away with it covered in bright red blood. Her last nerve snapped.

“Give him here,” she sobbed and wondered what Harry had done with her wand. She was going to hex Snape as soon as she found it.

“Keep your voice down, do you wish to startle Saccius? And look at yourself.” His voice took on a deep menacing quality. “Do you want to bleed on our child? Be reasonable and give me no trouble. You should have learned your lesson by now. Muggles are nothing but doltish savages. We’re going.” He took a step further, planning to Apparate them on the spot to St. Mungo’s.

Hermione caught the look in Snape’s eyes and drew away.

“Give the good Witch her baby back, Snape.” The voice coming from the doorway was cool and relaxed, with a touch of amusement. “It would be a shame to hex you.”

“Ron!” Hermione smiled in relief.

Ron Weasley was leaning in the doorway, pointing his wand directly at Snape.

“Well, I wouldn’t give you a jelly legs ‘cause then you might drop the baby, but how about a nice case of boils? Would that suit you?”

Sneering, Snape handed the baby to Hermione who leaned back on her pillows with a sigh. Snape only gave her the baby so he’d have his hands free to get to his wand and hex the red haired Wizard. He slowly moved to make sure that Hermione and the boy were out of the line of fire.

“Make him leave, Ron,” she said. It seemed rather pathetic that she had to rely on him; however, she was feeling rather tired and sad.

“In a moment, love.” Ron-- still dressed in his Keeper’s uniform and looking and smelling like he’d just left a Quidditch match, walked into the room. He had grown quite tall and was easily two or three inches larger than Snape. “Who dressed you, Snape? You look awful. Don’t you know any better than to wear a pit helmet with a business suit? You should be wearing a Stetson.”

“This is none of your concern, Weasley. Nor do you have the right to be telling me what to wear.” He waited for an opportunity to get to his wand.

“This is my concern, Snape. When I come in here and see you harassing my fiancée, well, I get shirty about these things.” Ron smiled.

“Lupin said Hermione wasn’t interested in having a father for Wal… Wall… Waldo.” It took a supreme effort to say the horrid name, but if Weasley were in the running he’d have to change tactics.

“Well, we didn’t want to hurt Harry or Remus’ feelings, didn’t we now my little honeycup?” Ron waggled his eyebrows and Hermione swallowed hard not to burst out laughing and pull a few more stitches.

“How so?” Snape suspected that Weasley was just taking the piss, but he needed to be sure. Two decades of being a House Master and he knew a lie when he heard one.

“Well, Lupin gets furry once a month and Harry, well, we still don’t exactly know about Harry’s orientation, do we?” Ron blushed a little. “But I did propose, and there’s nothing wrong with me. Pure blooded as they come.”

Snape slowly smiled. He was sure that Weasley was lying now. He could just about taste it.

“But Hermione—“ Snape started.

“That’s Ms. Granger to you, Professor.” Said Hermione blushing furiously.

“But has she accepted?” Snape’s eyes darted from former student to former student.

“Waldo Weasley. Nice ring to it! What do you think, eh, Snapey old boy?”

Snape quirked a smile. “I think that she has no intention of marrying into the Weasley clan.”

Ron continued to smile, but his free hand went into a fist and a few green sparks few out of his wand still leveled at Snape. “Herm?”

“I’m feeling tired, please leave both of you.” She wanted to see if she could rouse Waldo enough to try nursing again and she wasn’t about to have her stitches investigated with the two men in the room. And she was thoroughly sick of the two men’s attempts at whatever game it was that men played.

“Snape, you heard her—shove off.”

“She hasn’t agreed to marry you. She’ll be marrying the father of her child, as is right and proper.” Ron still had his wand leveled at Snape, barring any chance for Snape to get his out.

“Quite. Oh, and then what will you do when Mama Snape puts a contract out on your heads with the Elfin Mafia? She doesn’t know yet, does she?” Ron smirked.

Snape went pale. “Hermione, I shall see you tomorrow,” he said between clenched teeth.

“It’s Ms. Granger!”

Snape started to reach into his pocket and Weasley gave him a warning cough. Snape raised his eyebrows and said, “I’m not going for my wand.” Snape slowly reached into his pocket and produced a slim volume. “I remember… you like books. Here’s a rare, out-of-print edition from the Snape library which, of course, shall soon be all yours.”

Snape carefully put the book at the foot of her bed and turned to leave. Just as he was halfway out the door he turned and sa“Oh,“Oh, and please do call me Severus.” The door closed.

“Hermione!” Ron came over to the witch who immediately burst into tears.

“Oh, Ron. Could you put Waldo into his bassinette? He’s sleeping again.”

Ron took the child and put him down as requested without a glance at him.

“So, you will marry me? Right?”

“No, Ron. That thing you sent me on a smelly and soggy fish and chips wrapper written with what looked to be a women’s eyebrow pencil does not qualify as a marriage proposal. But as garbage it did qualify and so into the dustbin it went.”

“You’re breaking my heart, love. I mean, it’s as I said. Here I am, and I’m perfect. No expectations, no ties. I’ll have my career and the harem and you’ll have the Weasley name. It’s perfect.”

“What harem, Ron?” Hermione kept her voice mild. She felt faint.

“Why, that’s what my groupies call themselves, Ron’s Harem. There are a few of them in every town. Rather comforting they are. Sort of like a big hen party, they keep me out of trouble.”

“Oh,” Hermione swallowed. Then she sniffed.

Ron continued, “I mean if you wanted something more, well, we did have a pretty good snogging session or two back in Sixth year. So I wouldn’t mind having sex with you.”

“How big of you… Ron, I haven’t seen you in months.”

“Well, between the coach making us practice and me mum making me come back to the Burrow every spare chance... And then your schedule’s been pretty tight, right? And I probably won’t see you for another six months or so. But you wouldn’t mind, I know, Harry said you don’t want a man in your child’s life.”

“Harry said that? Yes, I suppose that was the impression I gave,” she said distractedly, no longer quite sure what it was that she wanted.

Hermione felt herself sinking deeper into a dark trough. Changing the subject she asked, “What was that about Snape’s mum? You gave him a right start, you did.”

“Oh, you never heard? Well, yeah, I was told to keep it under my hat. I found out from Moody about Snape’s past when we were out drinking with some of the Order members around the time of our victory. It’s pretty rich. I would have told you but—“

“Well, what is it?”

“Nothing in particular. Seems Snape’s mum is a real piece of work. Snape’s father hated her so much he upped and killed himself when Snapey was just an infant. Then she married some follower of Voldemort and he upped and killed himself, too. A right black widow she was.” Ron spied a fruit basket and began picking through it to find something he might fancy. Choosing an apple, he continued, “According to Moody, she may have even been Tom Riddle’s mistress at one point. Married hubby number one to get a hold of the Snape family fortune which she gave to the Death Eaters. Losing the war pretty much did her in. She sits alone at the old family estate, like a spider in a web and with not two knuts left to rub together.”

Hermione stared at Ron. “You know. I think that explains a lot about him.”

“Do you think so?”

“Rather. Well, it’s a good thing I won’t be marrying him, then. By the way, how’s Molly taking your proposal?”

Ron’s skin faded under his freckles and tan. “Mum! Oh, er… yes, well, I didn’t mention anything because you never wrote back. I suppose,” Ron’s voice came out an octave higher and strangled. He coughed, ”a bit of dust in the back of my throat. Do you have any water?”

Hermione pointed to the jug and a paper cup. Ron poured himself a cup.

“Better. OH, look at the time. Got to fly, Hermione.” Ron gave her a swift peck on the cheek.

“One thing before you go.”

“Anything you want,” said Ron stopping in mid stride and looking nervous.

“Could you have a quick look see for my wand?”

“Accio Hermione’s wand.” Ron said. Suddenly the top drawer of her dresser flew open and the wand hovered and darted into her hand. Hermione smiled. “Good, now get the Hell out before I give you a good case of Jelly legs.”

“Hermione?”

“OUT!” She pointed her wand at Ron.

“Right. Well. Be seeing you.” The door closed behind him and Hermione sighed.

“Prats! They are all royal prats!” Tears rolled down her face. Her stitches had stopped bleeding, but she decided to call the nurse anyway. She put her wand in the top drawer of her nightstand, gasping a little as the incision protested her movement, and pressed the call button. She scooted down and managed to get hold of the book Snape had left by flipping it into her lap using her foot.

She looked at the cover and squealed in sheer delight, “Mrs. Kentish Blossom’s Olde Book of Practical Spells and Cures for the Nursery. Oh Merlin! He was right: there’s not a copy to be had for love or money.” In her frenzy of antiquarian joy, she lifted up the book and kissed it. “Yes!” She started flipping the pages, “Right here, For Newborns Who Sleep All the Time and Refuse to Nurse.”

Grunting a little, she endured the pain to get her wand back from the top drawer and quickly did the incantation, trusting that the Nurse would, as usual, totally ignore her bell call for at least a half hour. Just seconds after the incantation, Waldo gave a lusty cry of hunger.

Hermione hid her wand under her pillows and endured more pain as she leaned over and got her baby up and out of the bassinette. She drew out her seemingly huge, blue veined breast and tickled it under the baby’s lip. He opened his mouth and latched on like a pro. Hermione felt wonderful as the precious colostrum flowed from her. Waldo took huge, furiously noisy gulps and she watched him swallow in pride. Finally, her body had done something right!


&&&

Snape sat in his office surrounded by all some 150 crates of books from his family’s library. He had had to bring them all out of storage just to locate the one book that he felt sure was vital to his son’s well being. His library, the Snape family library was only his because he’d paid Mundungus Fletcher to bid upon it when his mother put it all up for auction several years ago. He hadn’t spoken to his mother in about two decades and he dreaded the thought that the old harridan might discover the addition to the Snape family tree. Gods only knew what she might do if she found out the newest scion of the Snapes was of Mudbl—scratch that, Muggle-born stock.

Snape eyed the unopened fire whiskey bottle before him. Hadn’t it caused enough trouble already? But no, it was the reason that he now had a son. Snape closed his eyes and remembered the feel and smell of the boy and the contented, wide-eyed look on his red, squashed-in face. Snape wiped away a tear. His son. No, neither Weasley nor Potter would ever raise his boy.

He opened the bottle and poured slightly more than a tot. He then opened a directory of Wizarding businesses. Taking a sip and grimacing, he leafed through the pages until he found the adverts for Solicitors.


A/N: Big hugs and many thanks to my wonderful reviewers: Deb, LovesthePotionBoy, Spaz141, Nocturnus, Mele, DeblovesDragon, Mother, Yncarn8, Bambu, Redone, Tifsuz, Ran, Karen, Scorpion, Pauline, Moony Reader, Katta and Nesscafe.

And an extra thanks to Ozratbag2 for her read through and lovely support. Big Hugs.


Artist: The Supremes
Song: Baby Love
Ooh baby love, my baby love
I need you, oh how I need you
But all you do is treat me bad
Break my heart and leave me sad
Tell me, what did I do wrong
To make you stay away so long

\'Cause baby love, my baby love
Been missing ya, miss kissing ya
Instead of breaking up
Let\'s do some kissing and making up
Don\'t throw our love away
In my arms why don\'t you stay
Need ya, need ya
Baby love, ooh, baby love

Baby love, my baby love
Why must we separate, my love
All of my whole life through
I never loved no one but you
Why you do me like you do
I get this need

Ooh, ooh, need to hold you
Once again, my love
Feel your warm embrace, my love
Don\'t throw our love away

Please don\'t do me this way
Not happy like I used to be
Loneliness has got the best of me
My love, my baby love

I need you, oh how I need you
Why you do me like you do
After I\'ve been true to you
So deep in love with you

Baby, baby, ooh \'til it\'s hurtin\' me
\'Til it\'s hurtin\' me
Ooh, baby love
Don\'t throw our love away
Don\'t throw our love away

http://www.stlyrics.com/lyrics/mygirl2/babylove.htm